by Levine, Nina
“Open the door and let me in,” I demanded. “Your daughter needs you, so you need to hear me out.”
She debated about allowing me in for another good minute before finally unlocking the door and swinging it open.
I entered the house and walked into the kitchen, doing my best to ignore the onslaught of memories. Fuck, they were like a hundred motherfuckers coming at me all at once. Fucking stabbing me all over.
“Tony Romano is dead,” I said, facing her.
I would have expected a reaction to that statement, but all she gave me was an arch of her eyebrows.
Fucking stunned, I said, “That’s all you have to say when I tell you your daughter’s husband is dead? You’re a fucking piece of work, Bethany.”
“Watch your mouth,” she snapped.
“You care more about a fuck coming out of my mouth than the fact your daughter is alone in this world?” This woman made my fucking blood boil, and I regretted coming here. Ivy was better off without her.
“I care more about being subjected to your presence than the words out of your mouth. As for Ivy, she made her bed years ago. In fact, she made it the first time with you, and I should have known she was incapable of making better decisions, but I fell under her spell again for a while there.”
“You fell under her spell? What the hell does that mean? She’s your child for fuck’s sake. What kind of parent talks about their children like that?” Fucking hell.
Her displeasure plastered itself over her face, but I ignored it. I didn’t give a flying fuck if I upset her. “She’s not my blood. I tried to help her, and look what I got in return—nothing but heartache.”
My breaths came harder. Heavier. They carried my fury as I let loose on her. “There’s a reason you weren’t blessed with children of your own. Heartache is part of love, and when you choose to bring a child into your life, you choose all the things that go with love. You can’t fucking have love without pain. As a parent, it’s your job to teach your child how to deal with both so that they can go out into the world and stand on their own two feet and weather the fucking storm of love. If you weren’t ready for that job or to accept that sometimes those you love will tear pieces of your heart out, you should never have taken Ivy in. Because the very word mother means unconditional fucking love. It means protection. It means safety. And while you knew how to make cookies and decorate a house so it looked like you were a mother, you never had a fucking clue how to give any of those things.”
My tirade angered her to the point where she finally gave me the kind of emotional response I felt this conversation deserved, but it wasn’t the response I’d hoped for. Pointing at the front door, she snarled, “You’ve said what you came for and now you can leave. And don’t ever come back here. You are never welcome here again.”
I had no intention of ever coming back here. I wasn’t sure why I thought this had been a good idea to begin with.
Anger and disappointment punched through me as I stalked out to my bike. Thank fuck I hadn’t told Ivy I was coming here. Bethany’s rejection would have killed her.
* * *
Thoughts of Bethany filled my mind for the rest of the day. As much as I tried, I couldn’t get her out of there. A headache settled in at lunchtime and intensified to the point where I wanted to rip my fucking head off by 6:00 p.m. I called Lily to let her know I wouldn’t be over tonight. Fuck knew I was in a mood, and she didn’t need to be subjected to it.
“Hey you,” she answered with a smile I could hear all the way over here. “I’ve just put dinner in the oven, and the best news of the day is that Linc took the kids, so we have the place to ourselves.”
Fuck.
“I can’t make it tonight.” I was a fucking bastard, but the choice was made for her, and as far as I was concerned, it was the right one.
She went silent for a beat. “What’s wrong, King? You sound off.”
I rubbed my temple. “It’s been a shit of a fucking day, and trust me, you do not need me there tonight.”
Silence again, and then softly—“Okay so while I get that, here’s something for you to consider. Maybe when you have a shit of a fucking day, coming to see me is exactly what you need. That’s what relationships are about, right? Sometimes you give, sometimes you take. Let me give tonight. And if all you want is to sit in front of the TV in silence, I’m good with that. We can just be tonight. We don’t have to do.”
Somehow I knew that when Lily made an offer or promise like this, she meant it and would make good on her word. I also knew this was her telling me she wanted to be the one to help me. And while I had never been big on people helping me, because mostly they just fucking let me down, I also knew I’d finally found someone I wanted to allow in to help. Lily wouldn’t let me down.
“I’m leaving now,” I said gruffly. “You got beer?”
“Yes,” she said around another smile I figured they could fucking see from Mars, “I have beer.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Lily
Monday night, I sat outside on my back patio, grabbing as many quiet moments to myself as I could while my kids and mother fussed over Brynn inside. I leaned back in my seat and stared up at the dark sky while trying not to think about the fact I wasn’t smoking. I’d given it up again this morning. I was sure I was already nearly dead from that. Everyone told me smoking would kill me; I figured not smoking might be more dangerous to my health. My mental health at least.
I shifted my thoughts to King and the weekend we’d just had together. He’d shown up Friday night all screwed up by something that had happened that day. I hadn’t asked him what. He hadn’t offered. I’d learnt that King didn’t like to discuss shit, and I was okay with that. I mean, I wanted to know everything about him, but I refused to try to change him to be someone he wasn’t. King had a lot of baggage, but he didn’t want or need someone to carry it for him. He just needed someone to take the trip with him, and I liked the views his journey offered, so I was all on board.
He’d worked my body so hard that night that there hadn’t been any more sex for us on the weekend. I’d taken care of him, but he hadn’t tried to fuck me again, and I hadn’t asked for it. Jesus, the man was brutal in bed, but I couldn’t get enough of him. King put a smile on my face simply by breathing. All it took was a thought of him, and I was smiling like a loon.
Adelaide had asked me on Friday why I wasn’t fearful of getting involved with a man like King, a man who ran an MC. I’d told her she didn’t know his heart, which meant she didn’t know anything. When I met King, I saw two things—that he had the kind of looks I was attracted to, and that he was a bit of an asshole. Then I saw how he cared for and looked after his sister. Then I saw a moody bastard who liked to boss people around, but who also helped people when they needed it. Through all of that, I saw a man trying to handle his business and look after those he cared for. I didn’t see the biker or club president with a dark streak that Adelaide would have run a mile from. By the time I saw King’s club and all that entailed, I’d already fallen for his heart. And for me, everything in life was about the heart.
I had been worried when he’d told me the kids and I may have been in danger. I’d definitely spent some time running through scenarios in my mind of what he could possibly have been referring to. I had also thought long and hard about what this meant for my life going forward. In the end, I’d decided to put my faith in him and his men to protect us. At the core of the matter was my heart. I couldn’t change who it led me to. And King had mine. Now he had my complete trust, too.
“Lily.”
I turned my face to find King walking towards me. Standing, I met him halfway and looped my hands around his neck. That was after I took the time to run my gaze over his body, appreciating the way his muscles filled out his clothes. My belly fluttered as I thought about those muscles. His powerful thighs straddling me, his strong arms holding me, his firm ass that I couldn’t get enough of.
After I caught his lip
s in a kiss, I said, “I was just thinking about you.”
He snaked his hands around my waist and settled them on my butt. “Your mother told me you’ve been sitting out here for a while now. You good?”
I liked how he always had a way of taking in the stuff I said to him without feeling the need to comment on it or engage in conversation about it. Because honestly, sometimes I rambled. King let me do that without complaint.
“I’m good. I’m taking advantage of the kids being occupied by Brynn and Mum.” I leaned in close and inhaled his scent. “Oh God, you smell so good.” At his frown, I said, “I quit smoking again today. I can smell the cigarettes on you, so you should expect me to be smelling you a lot going forward.”
His lips twitched and he brought his mouth back to mine. He then kissed me so thoroughly and for so long that I got lost in it and missed him as soon as he pulled away. “Maybe I’ll smoke more and kiss you more, just so you can get the taste,” he rumbled.
I tightened my hold on his neck as I cocked my head to the side. “Is that you being playful?”
His eyes flashed with heat. “That’s me figuring how to get my hands and mouth on you as often as I fucking can.”
I let go of his neck and slowly dragged my hands over his shoulder and down his chest and stomach. Stopping when I reached his jeans, I said, “Baby, you don’t have to engineer ways to do that. I’m down with you getting those hands and that mouth on me whenever and however you can.”
He seemed to like that, because the heat in his eyes flashed in ways that wouldn’t leave anyone confused as to what he wanted. We were interrupted by my mother, though, so the moment was broken.
“Lily, I really hate to barge in on you two, because, well, we all know that King is doing wonders for your dry spell, and I never want to do anything to stop that, but we really need to think about dinner. Brynn suggested we could order pizza. I think she’s desperate for some junk after all that hospital food, but I’m not sure I can stomach it. I was thinking more along the lines of Thai if we’re going to order, but that requires someone to go out and pick it up, and I wasn’t sure if you would want to do that, and I certainly can’t drive at the moment.” She eyed me with expectation, wanting me to say yes.
“Mum, you really need to let my dry spell go. I mean, I didn’t see the need to talk about it in the first place, because women are allowed to take time off sex, you know? But—”
“Oh, Lily, why do you always say that? And what woman in her right mind would want time off sex? I mean, really.”
King positioned me in front of him with his arm around my chest, and I didn’t miss the way his body shook gently with laughter.
“Maybe a woman who’s taking some time to be with herself for a while,” I threw out, exasperated with her.
Her forehead wrinkled as she thought about that for a moment. The idea seemed foreign to her, and in the end, she simply ignored it and carried on. “So about dinner. What do you want to do?”
“You order it. I’ll go out and pick it up,” King said.
Mum met his gaze and smiled. “Thank you.” She then glanced at me again, still seemingly trying to wrap her mind around what I’d said. With a quick shake of her head, she turned and left us alone again.
King let me go, and I faced him, smacking him lightly on the chest. At the questioning arch of his brow, I said, “That was for laughing at me and my dry spell.”
His mouth spread out in a smile. “I was laughing at your mother, not at you. She comes out with some fucking funny shit.” He shrugged. “And if it’s about you, I like it even more.”
My mouth almost dropped open. I had never seen him like this. And I really freaking liked it. “You just like the fact I was almost a virgin again by the time you got to me.”
And just like that, his sense of humour vanished and his heat returned. Yanking me to him, his mouth brushed my ear as he growled, “As far as I’m fucking concerned, you were a virgin when I got to you because you had never been fucked properly.”
I put my hands on his chest as his possessiveness rolled through me. It hit me in all the right places and had me desperate for him. God, but now was definitely not the time for that. Pushing against him, I stepped out of his hold. “You need to stop talking, and I need to go inside and get Brynn’s room set up for her.”
“You need a hand with that?”
I held my hand up at him and shook my head. “God no. I need you as far away from me as possible right now, otherwise, I might start climbing you.”
“Fuck,” he muttered.
“Yes, exactly,” I agreed. “You get to go sort dinner out with my mother.”
With that, I quickly headed inside to Zara’s bedroom where I was setting my sister up. I’d brought her home from the hospital this afternoon, telling her she would be staying with me until she’d recovered fully. She’d told me that King had rubbed off on me, because I was far too bossy for my own good now. I’d told her to shut up and just do what I said, to which she’d just looked at me and said, “Case in point.”
The doorbell sounded, so I made a detour to answer it.
“Hi,” I said to the dark-haired guy standing on the other side holding a bunch of flowers. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t take a little peek at his body. Dude was built. And had the face of a god.
He smiled, and I knew by the way it was almost a smirk that he’d seen me checking him out. But full points to him for not getting all cocky about it. “I’m looking for Brynn.”
“And you are?” As the words came out, though, it hit me. “Oh God, you’re the fishing dude, aren’t you?”
His smile turned into a grin. “I like the reference to me being the fishing dude rather than the other kind of dude. Classy. You must be Lily.”
I reached for his arm and pulled him inside. Turning my face towards the lounge room where Brynn was, I called out, “Brynn! Fishing dude is here!”
He leant in close and said, “Fishing dude’s name is Jamie.”
I returned his grin. “Oh, I like you! You should stay for dinner. We’re having Thai.”
“I love Thai.”
I dragged him into the lounge room and didn’t miss the way Brynn’s eyes lit up when she laid eyes on him. My sister liked more than just fishing with this guy.
Taking the flowers from him, I said, “I’ll find a vase for these while you two catch up.”
Jamie’s eyes didn’t leave Brynn. “We’ve been catching up for days over the phone.”
The way he said that, and the way he watched her told me that he also liked more than just fishing.
“Okay kids, it’s time to leave Auntie Brynn in peace.” When they grumbled about that, I said, “Anyone still in here in one minute will be on dishes duty all weekend.” With that, they all scrambled out of the room faster than I’d seen them move in weeks.
Brynn met my gaze with a smile and mouthed, “I love you.”
I could be a good sister sometimes.
* * *
Jamie stayed for dinner. He also convinced Mum and Zara to play a game of Scrabble with him and Brynn. King and Holly ended up in front of the television watching some sport while she grilled him some more about bikes. Robbie helped me with the dishes while my heart did a little dance over all the happiness in my house.
“Dad said he’d take me to karate on Saturday if you’re busy,” Robbie said as he wiped the last plate clean.
“Do you want him to take you, baby? I’m good either way.” I held my breath a little. This was the first conversation he’d initiated all week, and I hoped he’d spend some time opening up to me.
He shrugged. “I don’t know. I just thought you might be busy with King.”
I stopped wiping the counter so I could give him my full attention. “Does it feel like I’m busy with King all the time lately?”
He met my gaze, and I saw the hesitation in his eyes. “Maybe.”
“I’m sorry if it feels that way, but I want you to know that I am never too busy
for you. I have Saturday blocked off for karate and ice cream. I really want to take you, but it’s up to you, and I promise I won’t get upset if you want Dad to take you.”
“If you take me, will King go, too?”
“I haven’t asked him to go. I figured it would just be you and me.”
“Okay. I want you to take me, unless we spend the weekend at Dad’s.”
Shit.
Now I was confused about his feelings over King.
“Robbie, do you like King?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“No, really, you can be honest with me. If he’s done something to upset you, I want to know so we can fix it.”
“I like him.”
“But you don’t want him to go to karate with us?”
He glanced down for a moment before giving me back his eyes. “I think Dad would be upset if he went there with us. But he can hang out here with us. I asked him about hiring Thor to watch again, and he said if it was okay with you, he’d hire it again for us.”
Well fuck. My kid just broke my heart with his thoughtfulness and King patched it back up with his.
I nodded. “Okay, I understand what you’re saying, and I think you’re so thoughtful to consider your father’s feelings. And I am 100 percent on board with you guys watching Thor again.”
He grinned. “You’re gonna have a bath again while we watch it, aren’t you?”
I laughed. “You know me too well.”
“Mum!” Zara yelled out. “We need you!”
Robbie and I exchanged looks. “When does Zara ever need me?” I whispered.
He gave me a look that said he wondered the same thing, and then we headed out of the kitchen to look for her.
We found her in the lounge room with everyone. King sat on the end of the couch with Holly next to him and Mum next to her. His arm lay extended across the top of the lounge, and his long legs were stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen him so relaxed. Brynn and Jamie sat on the other couch, while Zara knelt in front of the coffee table. A cake sat on the coffee table. And not just any cake. It was my very favourite six-layer chocolate cake with toasted marshmallow filling and chocolate frosting.