by J. L. Beck
I pick up speed, each step full of determination. Is he fighting somebody? Is someone hurting him? My thoughts are all over the place.
Running through the warehouse, I weave in between large machinery and things that look like storage containers. When I finally get close enough for the voices to make sense, it hits me.
Hero is yelling at someone, not the other way around. “Tell me where he is!” Hero bellows.
When the other person doesn't answer, a loud smacking noise fills my ears, followed by a grunt.
Confused by what I’m hearing, I keep searching for them, hoping for the best and praying Hero is okay.
“You better tell my friend here what he wants to know. You don’t want to see what he is capable of…”
The menace in the unfamiliar voice scares me. There is no way he is talking about Hero, is there?
If you would have asked me ten minutes ago, I would have said no, but when I turn the next corner and Hero comes into view, everything I thought I knew about him changes.
His back is turned to me, but I know it’s him, there’s no denying it. Images of the way he cares for me, the gentleness of his touch, and the way he smiles down at me. All of those things fade away when I see the man before me.
He's not the same. This I know. Deep in the pit of my belly, I know...this is the part of him he hides.
My body shakes, my feet are cemented to the floor. I know I shouldn't watch, that I should look away, but I can't. Hero looms over a guy tied to a chair. His head is hanging low, his face bloody and bruised. I cover my mouth with my hands, watching the blood trickle down the man’s face.
Is he even alive?
Hero’s sleeves are rolled up, his hands balled into blood-covered fists. He pulls his arm back, the muscles in his body tense, and hits the poor guy in his stomach full force again and again. One hit, two hits, three hits. Air whooshes from the guy’s body, and when blood sputters from his mouth, I whimper, swallowing down the vomit rising into my throat.
In that moment, the guy who appears to be Hero’s friend turns in my direction, his eyes homing in on me.
I freeze like a deer caught in headlights, afraid to breathe, blink. I’ve been caught—and now, they’re going to kill me. They’re going to do the same thing to me they’re doing to him.
“Hey...you!” Hero’s friend yells at me.
His voice is so angry, it makes me jump back half a foot. My pulse pounds in my ears when Hero’s gaze swings in my direction. All the air leaves my lungs, and my blood turns ice cold when his eyes meet mine. Nothing could have prepared me for what I see when he looks at me.
His eyes are so dark, cold and calculating, they look like they don't even belong to him. I’m paralyzed by fear, and unable to move a single muscle. His lips move, as if he’s saying my name, but I can’t hear anything.
It isn’t until I see him take a step toward me that my body decides to work again. I twist around and start running back the same way I came. My chest heaves as my legs move frantically, wanting to get out of here as fast as possible. I can’t breathe, can’t think, I just need to leave this place and forget what I saw.
Everything will be better if I forget. Forget the look in his eyes…the blood on his fists. I squeeze my lids closed for half a second, wishing I hadn’t seen what I had.
“Elyse!” Hero’s voice calls out after me. I can’t tell if he’s angry, but that only makes my legs stronger and faster, pushing harder to get away from this nightmare—from him.
“Elyse!” he screams my name.
He’s getting closer now. I turn my head to look behind me, to see there are only a few feet between us, and he is closing the distance quickly.
Before I can turn my head back around, my foot catches on the side of one of the shipping containers. Everything seems to happen in slow motion.
One moment, I’m running, and the next, I’m tumbling, losing my balance mid run. My other foot lands wrong, and I know right away I’m in trouble. Pain like I’ve never felt before radiates through my ankle and up my leg.
Out the corner of my eye, I see Hero reach for me, but he’s still too far away and his hand grabs thin air.
I fly forward, about to the hit the unforgiving concrete floor when my arms come up by instinct, trying to break my fall. Bad idea. Bad idea, I tell myself, but it’s too late. My right hand touches the ground before anything else, and I hear the crack before I feel the pain.
The cry that leaves my lips is unlike any sound I’ve heard myself make before. It scares me, terrifies me straight to the bone. I curl up on the cold, hard floor into the fetal position, holding my wrist to my chest, hoping my outcome isn’t the same as the man’s back there.
“No…Elyse. Shit, babe…” Hero’s hand lands on my shoulder, pulling me toward him.
I jerk away, like his touch burns my skin. Even through the pain, I don’t want his bloodied hands on me.
All I can see inside my head is the man slumped over in the chair, blood dripping from his face.
Rolling onto my back, I scoot back on my elbows, trying to get away from him. “D-Don’t touch me! Just don’t hurt me, and I won’t tell anyone. I promise.”
The hurt in his eyes is apparent, but it’s nothing compared to the hurt I’m feeling. I feel like I just took a bullet through the heart that left me with a gaping wound in my chest.
I try to push myself up onto my feet, but quickly realize I must have twisted my ankle as well. Crying out in pain, I sink back to the floor with a hard thud.
“Baby, please, let me help you.” Hero doesn’t wait for my answer even as I scurry away from him. Slipping one arm under my legs and the other around my shoulders, he lifts me up and cradles me to his chest.
I try to break free of his hold, but there isn’t any point. With a hurt leg and hurt wrist, even if I did get him to let me go, how would I get away? I try to calm my breathing and erratic heartbeat, but nothing helps.
I want to hate him. How can I feel anything besides disgust and hate after what I just witnessed? I’m conflicted...confused...
Yet, when I’m in his arms, so close to him, I feel safe.
Turning my head, I bury my face into his shirt and start crying. I know it doesn’t make sense for him to be able to calm me down, since he is the one causing the panic in the first place, but he does.
“It’s okay. You’re okay. I’ve got you.” Hero continues to whisper sweet nothings in my ear, and I let him.
I let him comfort me, because despite everything, he is the only one who can give me the comfort I need right now. “What…were you doing?” I manage to get out between the sobs wracking my body. I have to know—was he going to kill again? Did that man ask him to? I need answers, and I need them now.
Hero doesn’t answer or even look at me at first. All I see is his jaw set in a hard line. He’s angry, pissed, but so am I.
“Hero?” I whisper carefully.
“What are you doing here?” he growls, ignoring my question, his arms tightening around my body. “I asked…no, I begged you to stay at home and wait for me.” His words make it sound like he is sad, but he isn't. Not really. He’s only sad I found out. “Why did you have to come here? Fuck, why, Elyse? I never wanted you to see this.”
His grip on me is almost painful, but I don’t say a word. There’s nothing left for me to say if he won’t give me the answers I need.
Feeling more broken than I’ve ever felt before, I consider the fact that maybe Tasha and my parents were right—maybe Hero isn’t really a hero after all.
Chapter Nine
Hero
I want to throttle myself. Every sob shaking her small body in my arms sends another shard of glass straight through my heart.
This is all my fault. I knew I should’ve told Damon to fuck off and deal with his problems on his own. But he’s like a brother to me and had my back when I needed it, so I figured I could repay him without getting my hands too dirty.
Ha. It’s never that easy, though
. I should have known. Why was I so fucking stupid to think otherwise? Now, I will have to live with this mistake for the rest of my life, never being able to forget the way Elyse looked at me. The horror in her gaze made me feel as if I had lost her. She was scared of me, scooting away from me as if I was going to hurt her.
I could feel the turmoil within Elyse. She wants to hate me, to be scared of me, and maybe she should be, but the way she’s leaning into me and fisting my shirt in her tiny hands tells me she needs me just as badly as I need her.
I want to tell her I’m sorry, but I can’t bring myself to say it yet. I’m too angry with her right now. Angry for coming here, getting hurt, and for making me show her the worst part of me—a part she never should’ve seen.
I heave the warehouse door open and step outside into the parking lot. The air is cool against my heated skin. I cradle Elyse closer to my chest, as if doing so will change the things she saw or the way she looks at me.
Seeing the pain on Elyse’s face, I’m certain I need to take her to the hospital.
With the way she fell onto her hand, I’m pretty sure she’s broken her wrist.
“Oh god, it hurts so bad,” she whimpers into my shirt.
Fuck, this is all my fault. All my fucking fault.
“I know, baby. I’m taking you to the hospital.” And then, it dawns on me. How the hell did she even get here? “Who drove you here?” I barely get the words out before I look up from Elyse’s face and spot Tasha’s car parked a few hundred feet away. Her car door flings open, and she jumps out, running toward us.
Shit! I don’t need her here.
Her brows furrow in confusion, that confusion slowly turning to worry as she gets closer, taking in the situation. “What happened?”
“She fell and twisted her ankle,” I say, trying to keep my voice even and calm, but the adrenaline is still coursing through my veins. I feel like losing it, ripping this whole fucking place to pieces. I haven’t felt this way since prison, and I don’t know how to reel it in—or if I want to.
Tasha comes to a sudden stop a few feet away from us. Her face turns a ghostly white as she catches a glimpse of my hands. I know what she’s thinking, and it’s true. I’m a monster. A criminal. A piece of shit.
Then, as if Elyse can tell what’s going on, she interjects, “I’m fine, Tasha, really. He is telling the truth. I just fell.”
Elyse tries her best to assure her friend, but it’s already too late. Tasha is terrified.
I clench my jaw, holding back the words I want to say. I can’t deal with her right now. She’s my last priority—the last thing I care about in this situation. So, instead of trying to calm her down and explain the situation, I just walk past her toward my car. “You can believe whatever the fuck you want, but I’m taking Elyse to the hospital.”
To my surprise, Tasha doesn’t say another word. Instead, she follows me to my car, opening the back door for me.
Carefully, I lay Elyse on the backseat, making sure not to touch her wrist or foot. I give her a once over, hating myself even more when I see the tears slipping from her beautiful blue eyes. I never wanted to see her cry, not at my hands, or anyone else's, and here I am, the reason she’s hurt.
I swallow down the pain I’m feeling and shut the door before walking around to the driver’s side. My hand hovers on the handle when I see Damon running across the parking lot, heading directly for me.
He’s giving me a crazy look, like I’m insane or something. “What the fuck are you doing, Hero?”
“She’s hurt, so I’m taking her to the hospital.” I pull open the door and sink into the driver's seat. I don’t care what Damon thinks right now. Nothing he says will change what I need to do for her, my everything.
When I try to pull the door shut, Damon grabs it, halting my movements. “Are you fucking crazy? She saw us. She’s a liability, Hero. We need to get rid of her, not take her to a fucking doctor.”
Get rid of her? I’m not sure I heard him right, so I play back his words inside my head. Get rid of her? To my people, that means one thing: death.
That’s the last word I hear rattle around inside my head before I lose all my senses. My mind goes blank, my body goes numb, and all I see is red. My vision is blurred with fury and rage.
I shove from the car and charge him. There was a time when I couldn't have imagined myself fighting my best friend for any reason, let alone over a girl, but right now, I could kill him, and I just might. How dare he threaten her. Threaten my Elyse. The thought of her hurt any more than she is snaps me in two.
Fuck him. Fuck them all.
There’s a flicker of surprise and terror in Damon’s dark eyes as my fist connects with his jaw. The impact is so violent, it vibrates through my entire body. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love it. Bones crunching underneath my knuckles is all I feel. I hit him again, and again, not letting him get even a single punch in.
Tasha screams something, but I don’t hear a single word. I do, however, feel her hands against my skin, trying to pull me back toward my car, but I’m not done with this fucker...not even close.
“Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Damon staggers, wiping at his bloodied lip and nose.
I point straight at him. “You!” I roar. “You are the problem. Having me come out here. Making me do this shit.” I’m losing my mind. My nostrils flare, and my body shakes. I tug at my hair, taking an unsteady step back.
“Me?” Damon huffs. “I didn’t make you do shit. You came here of your own free will, and that girl…” He points to my car.
I take a step toward him, ready to throw another fist at his face. Even the slightest mention of Elyse has me unhinged.
“She’s going to get you put back in jail, and then what...? What the fuck will you do?”
I shake my head, trying not to listen to him. Elyse is innocent, weak, unknown to the life I live.
She’ll never make it. I mean, look at her after just witnessing what she did tonight. Doubt swirls around inside my head.
I’m so angry at her, at myself...at my shit life. I’m obsessed with her, crazy with need for her, but I can’t risk hurting her. I can’t risk her being involved in any other crazy shit. This ends tonight.
“Do the right thing, Hero…” Damon backpedals, putting more distance between us, his hand wiping at his bloody nose, his eyes still piercing mine. “If you don’t, I will. We can’t have any loose ends ever, not even her.” I force myself to stay where I am.
I want to kill him, rip his heart out, but part of me knows he’s right. She’s a liability I cannot afford, and I don’t want to go to prison again. She’s ruined us—ruined it all.
Damon disappears back into the warehouse.
I can hear Tasha sobbing behind me. When I turn around, I see her hand over her mouth, fear spiking in her eyes. Good, she should be afraid, real fucking afraid. I separate the space between us in a second, my eyes bleeding into hers.
I don’t want to have to hurt Tasha, but I have to do whatever I can to protect myself…and since she doesn’t care about anyone but Elyse, I know exactly what I must do.
“Tell anyone what you saw here tonight, and I will hurt her,” I sneer, though my heart feels as if it’s bleeding as I say the words. “Anyone...the cops, a friend, your boyfriend, your grandma—anyone finds out, and I’ll destroy her.” I force myself to smile, making sure she understands how serious I am. “Do you understand?” I growl.
Tasha nods her head furiously. She looks like she might puke, but I don’t care.
I don’t fucking care about anyone. I’m broken, twisted, fucked up, and nothing and no one is ever going to change it.
If anything—tonight showed me that.
Chapter Ten
Elyse
Tears stain my cheeks and I force myself to breathe. In. Out. In. Out. But the panic attack claims me. I’m numb, hanging off the edge of a cliff, seconds away from falling into the unknown.
My heart is pounding so hard, I fee
l like I’m on the verge of a heart attack. My eyes are squeezed shut so tightly, I’m afraid to even open them. When I hear the squeaking of the car door and strong arms pick me up out of the backseat, they finally flutter open.
Hero’s holding me, carrying meI look up into his eyes, begging, pleading to see that man, the one I know cares for me.
“Hero...what’s happening?” I croak, my voice weak. He doesn’t answer me, though. In fact, his body is so tense, his anger vibrates off him, slamming into me.
I wish he would talk to me, say something, anything. I open my mouth to ask again, but the words freeze on my lips when he stops walking. His eyes stay trained ahead. Another car door opens, and he places me inside it. My gaze swings around, and I realize I’m now in Tasha’s car.
“What’s...what’s going on?” I’m in full blown panic mode. He told me he would take care of me, that he’d protect me no matter what.
“Take her to the hospital or back to the dorms. Whatever the fuck you want to do, but remember…” Hero’s voice is vacant of any emotion and a warning hangs in the air between them. I peer through the window, pounding on the glass with my good hand. Tasha visibly gulps, her eyes wide and full of fear.
Hero leans into her face. “Remember, you do anything stupid, she gets it.”
Something inside me snaps, breaking in two. All I know now is the Hero I knew, the Hero I cared for, is gone.
Tasha nods her head in understanding.
Hero dismisses her, turning around on his feet and walking back in the direction of his car.
I sag against the seat, my heart broken, fear, confusion, and sadness threatening to drown me.
Tasha enters the car slowly, her hands shaking as she closes the door and buckles her seatbelt.
She’s scared. It’s written all over her face.
“We—I-I need to get you to the hospital.” Her voice sounds calm.