by Jo Ann Brown
Her brows lowered. “What gossip?”
“As I was warned before I bought my farm, everyone knows everything about everyone in Salem.” He chuckled. “There’s not a person in the village who hasn’t heard my sister went to the thrift store and bought as many clothes for a boppli as she could find and brought them to your farm.”
“Those gossips have heard about Becky Sue and Joey already, so they won’t be surprised.”
“You’re right.” He took his eyes off the road and gave her a wink. “But you know as well as I do stories change when they’re repeated, whether along the Amish grapevine or among the Englischers. Who knows what the tale might become?”
* * *
Annie smiled beneath her scarf, which was covered in frost where her breath had turned to ice on the wool. How kind of Caleb to try to make her feel better about leaving when he was upset by how Joey reacted to him! She had no idea how to help him, so she played along with his silliness.
“I know too well about how things get distorted,” she said as he steered the wagon around a rut. Though riding in the open wagon was far colder than his buggy, she didn’t want to complain. It would take time to unhitch and rehitch his horse, time he wanted to spend at the bakery. Shoving down another shiver, she went on, “In my circle letter, sometimes I hear outrageous things that the writer believes is true.”
“I’m sure the rest of you set her straight.”
“We try to, but by the time the letter gets back to that person, the matter’s been forgotten.”
When he chuckled, she savored the sound. She’d met Caleb in the living room at Onkel Myron’s house a little over a year ago. He’d laughed like that, too, with her family. He’d come to talk about his plans for a settlement in northern New York. Many of the younger people in their district couldn’t afford a farm in ever more crowded Lancaster County. To the north, they would be able to purchase land and build a future for themselves and their kinder.
Lyndon had been enthusiastic. He’d been working at a meat-processing plant and had hated being stuck inside for most of each day. The opportunity to have a farm was too sweet for him to let it pass him by. He’d told Caleb he wanted to come before discussing it with his wife. Rhoda had been as excited about the prospect of having a farm of their own as Lyndon, and the kinder had looked forward to having their daed home throughout the day.
Annie had listened as well, delighted to see her brother look happy for the first time since he’d gone to work at the plant five years before. But then she’d noticed how her twin was more interested in Caleb than what he had to say. How Leanna’s eyes had glowed when she gazed upon him! Annie hadn’t seen such joy on her twin’s face since the news had come of Gabriel Miller marrying someone else the previous week. From that point until Lyndon purchased land for them in Harmony Creek Hollow days later, Leanna hadn’t talked of anything but Caleb’s plans and how it was an opportunity for them to put the small inheritance left by their late parents into a farm that could provide them with a home of their own.
At that moment, a plan—one to help her sister—had blossomed in Annie’s mind. She’d waited to see if Leanna would let Caleb know or if her twin had found someone else in the new settlement. Neither had happened, but when she concocted the idea, Annie hadn’t guessed how she would be drawn to Caleb herself. She couldn’t be happy if her sister was miserable, so she must...
“What did you say?” She realized Caleb had asked her a question while she was lost in her thoughts.
“I was wondering if Becky Sue has said anything about anyone in Iowa.” He stopped the wagon beside the bakery and jumped out.
“Not that I recall,” she replied as he came around to her side and held up his arms to assist her.
She put her hands on his shoulders. Leaning forward as he guided her to the ground, she found her eyes too close to his as his thick scarves brushed against hers. Her lips tingled as she imagined them on his without the wool between them. His gaze shredded her defenses. What would she discover if she were brave enough to explore the depths that were the color of deep green shadows?
Then her feet were on the ground, jolting her enough to break the connection between them. She thanked God for the pulse of common sense that had come in time.
“Why are you asking about Iowa?” Annie asked, focusing again on the mysteries surrounding Becky Sue.
“The day we found her at the bakery and I left a message for her family, I noticed there was an earlier call made to a number in the 319 area code. When I checked with Q yesterday, he looked online and found out the area code is in Iowa.”
Annie recognized the nickname for the Salem Volunteer Fire Department’s assistant fire chief, Robert Quartermaine. Caleb and Q had worked together to bring plain men in as volunteers. It’d been vital to the fire department because many of their members worked out of town, and there might not be enough to answer the siren and fight a fire. Because the Amish men worked at home, they were almost always available to respond.
“You think Becky Sue called someone?” Annie asked as Caleb opened the door and they went into the bakery.
“Who else?” He began unwrapping his scarves.
“The door was unlocked. Anyone could have wandered in and discovered the phone was working.”
“That’s true. I’d hoped it would be a clue to where she was heading.” His face fell as hope dimmed in his eyes.
She regretted being blunt. Putting her fingertips on his sleeve, she said, “And it may be, Caleb. I wanted you to consider alternatives, but I’ve been wrong before. Plenty of times.”
She was filled with the icy memories of how she’d been wrong to trust Rolan. As before, she tried to remind herself it was better she’d learned the truth before she’d risked her heart. That didn’t help. His betrayal had seared her.
And she would never betray her sister the same way. Annie had to put aside her attraction for Caleb and help him see Leanna was perfect for him. She had to figure out how.
Chapter Seven
“I’ve told you everything, Caleb!” Becky Sue stood with her hands on her hips and her chin lifted in the pose she took whenever Caleb tried to probe into the secrets she refused to share.
He’d invited her to visit the bakery that morning on the pretense that he wanted to show her the recent changes, but she’d seen right through him. During the drive from the Waglers’ farm to the main road, she’d repeated the story she’d told him and Annie when they’d discovered her hiding in the building. Not a fact changed, which made him more suspicious. Had she memorized what she was going to say ahead of time?
Caleb doubted his young cousin had any idea how difficult it was to keep his frustration from bursting forth. Only Annie’s urging for him to let Becky Sue open to him in her own time kept him from demanding that she be honest right then.
“I’m willing to listen without judging,” he said. “Whenever you want to talk, let me know.”
“I want to talk without every conversation being about Joey.” Tears blossomed in her eyes.
He looked at her standing in the half-finished kitchen. The appliances were connected and some of the cabinets hung. Supplies remained in crates, stacked almost to the ceiling. One wall was partially painted a fresh white, the project Annie had begun yesterday.
Among the large boxes and shining appliances, Becky Sue appeared so young, so vulnerable...so much in pain. Sympathy flooded him, and he nodded. Annie had been right. Becky Sue was deeply hurt and had left everything familiar in the hopes of escaping that pain. Pushing her further would only add to her grief.
“Not talking about Joey won’t be easy,” Caleb said, trying to make his voice sound carefree. “He does so many new things every day, and if you don’t tell me about them, Annie does.”
Becky Sue regarded him with suspicion. Did she think he was trying to coerce her into letting down her guard?
&
nbsp; Ja, she did.
He sighed. If she mistrusted him so much, what hope was there of him convincing her to be honest? He wondered why she’d come to Harmony Creek Hollow. Maybe she’d thought he would welcome her and her son and ask no questions.
She’d miscalculated. And his curiosity was matched by Miriam’s. His sister had asked him almost every time they spoke if he’d discovered the reason Becky Sue had traveled north from Pennsylvania, but Miriam hadn’t got anything more from the girl.
“Annie doesn’t focus every conversation on why I’m here and what I plan to do next,” Becky Sue retorted, her hands fisted at her waist. “She treats me like a person instead of a problem.”
He flinched, remembering how he’d used the same word to describe Becky Sue and how Annie had chided him. Could they both be right? Had he got so accustomed to dealing with challenge after challenge with the new settlement that he’d lost sight of how people were involved? If so, it was gut he’d stepped aside as the district’s leader. The Leit had been blessed by the lot when Eli Troyer had been chosen as their new minister and Jeremiah Stoltzfus as their deacon.
“You’re right,” he said. When Becky Sue stared at him in shock, he added, “I do admit when I’m wrong.”
“Not something everyone in our family does.”
At her bitter tone, he wanted to ask her to be specific, but guessed she would see his questions as another attempt to get the truth from her.
“Well, I’m one who admits when he’s wrong. To do otherwise chances putting me on the road to hochmut.” He sighed. “But I wish Joey would give me a chance. It’s unsettling to hear him scream whenever I come near.”
“Stay away from him, and he won’t cry.”
Again he had to bite back what he wanted to say. If her words were an attempt to infuriate him, he wasn’t going to play her game.
Instead he said, “True, but I’d hoped for a different solution.”
“I’ve got to get going.” She edged toward the door.
Opening the door, she was gone. A wave of cold washed into the bakery in the moment before the door closed again.
Caleb watched out the window as she climbed into his buggy. Slapping the reins on Dusty, she drove at a speed that made the back wheels bounce on the frozen ground. She hadn’t asked if she could use his buggy, and he’d have to grab a ride home with Annie.
Glancing at the clock, he saw she should be arriving in about an hour. He’d arranged for her to drive herself that morning so he could have time with his cousin. Persuading Becky Sue to open up to him had failed.
He pushed away from the window as the buggy disappeared along the road. Jamming his hands into his pockets, he strode across the kitchen, maneuvering around the big boxes holding supplies.
Today, he had no interest in unpacking crates. He was making a mess of dealing with his cousin, and he wasn’t sure what to do next. His self-doubts surged forward, eager to consume him.
Most of those doubts spoke to him in his ex’s voice. Verba had insisted he give up his dream of opening a bakery, and she’d wanted to keep him under her thumb because she’d started dictating to whom he could speak and when.
Fool that he was, he hadn’t seen the truth until she’d demanded he ignore one of his gut friends and sit with her at a youth event. He’d said he wanted to talk with his friend, and she’d flown into a rage. Embarrassed by the accusations filled with half-truths that she’d spewed in front of everyone gathered in the barn, he’d had his eyes opened.
So he’d set out to make his dreams come true. He’d found the fallow farms along Harmony Creek Hollow that would make homes for others who shared his longing to own property and farm it. Now that the settlement was thriving, he’d turned to building a bakery where he could use products from his farm and others’.
What now, Lord?
Instead of an answer deep in his heart, leading him in the right direction, he heard the clip-clop of hooves. He glanced out the window and saw a buggy coming to a stop.
Why had Becky Sue returned? Had something gone wrong with the vehicle, or—and he prayed he was right—had she decided to be honest with him?
He reached for the knob, then froze when he saw Annie step out of the buggy. What was she doing here? She wasn’t supposed to come until...
The wall clock chiming the hour startled him, and he realized Annie was on time. He’d spent the last hour lost in thought.
Wasted the last hour, his conscience reminded him. Instead of opening a box and wrestling out the contents so he could hang another cabinet in place to get him one step closer to being able to open his shop, he’d stewed about the past he couldn’t change.
Annie breezed in along with another punch of cold air. She called a cheery greeting as she unwrapped her wool shawl. That he gave her no answer didn’t seem to bother her because, as she hung the shawl, her heavy coat and her black bonnet up, she told him about Joey’s latest antics.
Caleb’s failure to laugh at her story seemed to cut through her chatter.
She halted in the middle of a sentence and stared at him before asking with her usual candor, “What’s bothering you?”
“How little work I’ve got done today.” It was the truth...or most of it.
“What would you like me to do?” She bustled across the kitchen to where she’d left off painting the previous day. “Keep going with the white? Or do you want this wall a different color? Customers will be able to see through the door to this wall. Maybe you’d like it to match or contrast with the color in the front section.”
“Why?” For once, he was glad to let her keep talking. It would allow him to pretend his biggest worry was the color of the walls instead of the secrets his cousin was keeping from them.
She shrugged. “To pull their eyes toward the kitchen and the aromas emanating from it.”
“I’ll worry about those details after the bakery opens when I see if anyone comes to buy my goods.”
Her eyes narrowed. “What’s this depressing talk? Your bakery is going to be a success, Caleb.”
“You sound sure.”
“I am.” She smiled, and the sunshine seemed to glitter more brightly on the snow. “You’ve considered the roadblocks for you and the bakery. You’ve mapped out the route you want to take.”
“I thought I had until you made some excellent suggestions for things I hadn’t considered.”
* * *
Annie tried to ignore the warmth of his compliment washing over her and figure out what was bothering him, but it was impossible.
Caleb thought at least some of her ideas were gut. Did that mean he wanted her to keep offering them? Should she ask?
In the moment of her hesitation, he went on, “Don’t ever get the idea I don’t want to hear your ideas. I can’t promise I’ll agree with them or do anything with them.”
“I appreciate your honesty.”
“And I appreciate yours.”
Her stiff shoulders sagged as she let her anxiety sift away. He was open to listening to her ideas. Even so, she shouldn’t verbalize every thought in her head.
Yet she couldn’t help herself from replying, “If you appreciate my honesty, tell me honestly what’s going on with you. I don’t know if I’ve ever heard you sound so glum.”
While he explained his futile attempts to get to the truth of why his cousin had appeared in his bakery, she prayed again for the right words to remind him that everything that happened was in God’s hands. In his frustration, he was forgetting that the One who knew everything wanted Becky Sue and Joey safe, too.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Maybe by seeing how close your family is, Becky Sue will begin to miss her own enough to want to return home.”
She laughed in spite of the tension lingering in the kitchen. “I don’t know if she’ll be able to pull Joey away from Penny. That b
oppli and puppy are never more than inches apart.”
“Let’s handle that obstacle when we get to it.” He moved to a half-opened crate. As he bent to tear the cardboard away, he said, “Danki for listening to my troubles.” He gave her an uneven smile. “Danki for listening to them again, I should say.”
“I wish I could do more.”
“You’re doing more than you can guess. It should be our way to listen to each other and to learn from each other. Not just in our faith, but in the ways we decide to make our way while on this earth.”
She pulled an extralarge shirt that had belonged to Lyndon over her clothes before reaching to reopen the paint can. “People are right, Caleb, when they say they know you would have done a gut job for us if your name had been drawn in the lot for minister or for deacon.”
“It’s time for others to lead the settlement.”
“You don’t miss it?”
When he didn’t give her a quick answer, she perceived that, for Caleb, choosing whether or not to lead the settlement was a more complicated decision than she’d imagined. And why wouldn’t it be? The settlement was something he’d worked very hard for, sacrificing his time and dreams to bring it to fruition.
“Ja,” he replied, “there are times when I miss being involved. There are plenty of other days when I thank God for giving me time to build my business and to allow me to spend time studying His word so I may grow closer to Him.” He sighed. “And ask His advice on how to help Becky Sue and Joey. She’s a stubborn kind.”
Pouring white paint into the roller tray, Annie glanced over her shoulder for a brief second. “She may seem like a kind to you, Caleb, but she’s been thrust into adulthood by becoming a mamm.”
“That doesn’t mean she can withhold basic information from me when I’m trying to help her.”
“Would you reveal everything you’ve experienced if she asked you to be honest with her?”
“It’s not the same. I’m not a single parent who won’t identify the other parent.”