by J E Mueller
When they were gone my fear dissipated. I finally had a moment to look down to see Lee was unconscious and his chest was not moving.
I fell to my knees and listened for a breath, but was rewarded with nothing.
All of it was for nothing.
I cried, cursed, and screamed. My magic picked up once more and dying out as my screams turned into sobs. He was gone.
Lee was dead.
The sounds of fighting echoed around me. There was no one here, and for once I felt terrible that no one was here. I couldn’t move Lee from the battle – he was too heavy for me to lift – so instead I ran to find someone. The two people I found to help had trouble moving him. His body was still so warm from my fire…
When they took him away, I left. There was still some parts of the village on fire, and it danced with glee behind me, but I could see that help had arrived sometime during my fight. They wouldn’t need me here, and I had no desire left to stay. Beaten and numb, I was done. Another friend was gone.
Chapter 19
I stared at Celia and Leia, having forgotten where I was while rehashing my past for them. I still was grieving terribly. I had been pushing myself into a routine and trying to make life normal again, but it wasn’t enough. I missed my friend. Stupid sarcastic Lee. In the end I was right and my magic had won out. Such a bitter victory.
Without another word I went to bed. My eyes stung with fresh tears and my throat hurt from the retelling. There really was nothing they could do to help this, and if time were the answer it wouldn’t show until much later.
The next morning I didn’t get up. I laid in bed until noon. I wanted to go back to work, but the illusion that things would be all right was broken. I tried anyway and made myself as useful as possible. The next day wasn’t much better, but I got up earlier and forced myself to help more. They tried to talk to me, but I didn’t have much to say. One or two word answers were the best I could give.
At some point Leia had left. I felt as if her disappearance confirmed that they could not help me, even though I had known she was just passing through from the beginning.
My dreams were nightmares, and all were of that most recent terrible night. The flames spreading from building to building faster than we could work seemed to trap me in the dream. Then the fighting would make my dreams more restless. The fire, the swords, and those final moments caused me to wake in a cold sweat. My heart was racing, as if it could break free from my ribs and be done with this cursed body.
If I had arrived moments earlier would he have survived? It was too much to tell if my timing was at fault or if things would have still ended badly regardless. Awash in my own feelings, I didn’t notice the days ticking by.
Surprise struck me as I ran into Leia one afternoon.
“Oh, you’re back,” I said dropping the pile of blankets I had just folded. I bent down to pick them up again and Leia helped me.
“My task is done, so I have returned.” She replied with soft words and a kind smile. “Are you feeling any better today?”
I ignored the question. “How did your task go?” I asked instead. It was clear I wasn’t better, so I chose to ignore the rhetorics.
“Well, I was only extra help. They just needed someone with strong healing powers. The aid they had was very well experienced so I hadn’t needed to do much.”
“Oh, that’s good…” I thought about it for a moment, “If they already had healers why did they send for another?”
“The situation was special.” She laughed with glee at the thought, “In short, the person had wanted to be fully healed so they could set off for a noble quest. I gave the story a listen and decided it was worth it. One of those rare true love tales you can get swept away in.”
“Oh,” I replied, not wanting to hear it. “I’m sure Celia will be happy you’re back.”
“She hates my unannounced visits.” Leia laughed with childish delight. “My little Celia demands perfection in her life and I waltz in here with little notice and bring my chaos and charm. This time she hasn’t had time to miss me, so we’ll see what she says.”
“She says what the heck are you doing back without notice?” Celia said for herself. She leaned in the doorway, arms crossed and covered in dust and dirt. “I thought I smelled a brat.”
“Did you not bathe recently, sister?” Leia asked sweetly, batting her eyes.
“If I could smite you with my broom I would.” Celia tossed her broom at her sister who caught it was ease. “While you’re here you can sweep up. I have to head to the market.”
“Send Key. You’ll love the story I have to tell,” Leia insisted.
I shrugged, already knowing the tale would not be for me. “I don’t mind.” If it would spare me from hearing a tale of love and life I’d gladly jump for it. I was already filled with enough grief and didn’t need a fairy tale to worsen it.
She glanced from her sister to me, then back to her sister. “It’s decided then,” Celia said handing me a change purse. “Best rush off before Leia gets started. She’s overly dramatic in her tales.”
“Am not!” Leia gasped as dramatically as she possibly could. “Where’s the sisterly love?”
“It needs a notice,” Celia joked. “Go on, what’s the tale this time?”
I made my way out the door before she could start it.
The air in the market was cool and I set about finding the things on the list Celia had left in her pouch. The commotion of the end of the day was a wonderful distraction. I let the noise push out any thoughts I had and instead took in all the gossip I could hear. Most of the conversation was about the quality of the crops and that an easy winter ahead might make the next season less bountiful. If the ground thawed before it was ready it would hurt much of the crops and the forest.
It was odd to think that winter was near, but with my task quickly completed I headed back.
Just as I reached the door, Celia was there with another list.
“I forgot to write some things down.”
“No problem.” I read over the items.
“Hurry along then.” She was biting her lip, gazing off into the distance.
“Everything okay?” I asked, confused. Celia never had appeared nervous before. Did her sister create some sort of trouble in the time I was gone?
She shook her head. “My lovely uninvited sister brought extra guests.”
“Oh.” I nodded, understanding. “I’ll be back quickly then.” I handed her the full basket and took the empty one she had ready.
It seemed odd that her sister wouldn’t let her know such an important fact right away but then again she did enjoy giving her a hard time. Leia was probably amused by it, but was also likely helping her sister fix things up after causing such a stir. I quickened my pace so I could be back soon to help them and was once more in the market.
The more I thought about it while I shopped, the less it made sense. While her sister may show up once in a while with little or no notice Leia knew how much her sister cared about having everything ready and in perfect order. It seemed unlikely that she would just invite other people over when her sister wouldn’t be ready. With everything on the new list now safely tucked into the basket, I headed back quickly, wanting to see what was actually going on. Everything felt strangely out of place, but I could have been overthinking things.
Celia and Leia were both sitting outside awaiting my return, and I had to pause at the the edge of the walk.
“What’s going on?” I demanded an answer. Now this confirmed something was amiss.
Leia waved at me. “Well dinner first and then the story,” She insisted.
Celia nodded. “That’ll be the best. Yes.”
I stood firmly where I was. “There weren’t unexpected guests?”
“There are.” Celia sighed. “That wasn’t a lie in any fashion.” Her glare at her sister seemed convincing enough.
“Unexpected, yes, but she had an hours notice.” Leia waved off her sister’s glare
, unconcerned, “It went with my crazy story.”
“It actually was a good story this time.” Celia smiled. “Come on, Key.” She stood up. “Ignore my sister not writing to us about this and let’s go in.”
I hesitated for a moment, but there weren’t going to be answers unless I went inside. Surprises were not my thing, so I stayed on my guard. Celia took the basket from me when I reached her and I followed her in with Leia behind me. The sisters were a strange pair when put together, but I was curious to see what was going to play out.
At first I couldn’t hear anyone, and Celia stepped out of the way and I saw him.
I stumbled right back into Leia, and she caught me.
“A little friend told me you just needed to stay put until the full moon,” she explained with a wink.
My brain was not comprehending what I was seeing. Slowly standing up from his chair in the kitchen was Lee. Juni helped him to his feet. I sank to the ground.
“How are you not dead? I checked and you were dead!” I sobbed. Every part of me felt emotionally overloaded.
“Turns out Leia did have a fantastic tale.” Celia smiled, happy with my reaction.
“It’s a bit of a story, Key,” Lee replied with a laugh that turned into a cough.
“Will you stay and listen?” Leia asked with a sly grin.
Leia helped me to regain my feet and we all sat in the living room.
Together, Lee and I were on the sofa. I just hugged him, not believing he was real. I had checked! This was more than I could handle, but for once I was very glad to be wrong.
Lee didn’t try and move me. He began telling his story even as I held him.
“I thought for sure we were going to die. That fight was beyond our skill.” He said. “It was a surprise that you made it in time to save me after I first was hit, but then we were surrounded and soon you were disarmed… I don’t really know what happened next, since I was dizzy and bleeding everywhere, but suddenly your magic appeared like an explosion! I had never felt anything like it before. I could feel you pushing it from yourself. In that moment I knew you couldn’t have complete control over it, so I covered myself with my own magic. Yours bit and kicked at me, but I was able to keep it from consuming me.
I put all of my focus on keeping myself alive until I felt your magic die out. I must have used too much because I blacked out. Several of the healers said I was hardly breathing from the combined loss of blood and energy. It took two days for me to get well enough to start talking but by that point I knew you had to have been gone, which Mother confirmed. No one saw you leave, but she knew if you thought I was dead and had seen the guards arrive you’d have left in an instant. It would have been too hard to lose another friend, I’m sure.”
I still hadn’t let go of him and laid against him with my eyes closed, my energy gone from this shock and days of restless sleep.
“I still don’t believe it,” I told him softly. It was too insane of a miracle for me to comprehend.
“Yeah yeah.” He chuckled. “I basically come back from the dead and you’re too stubborn to accept it.”
“I think we should give you a few moments,” Juni said, walking to the doorway. “Ladies?”
Celia and Leia smiled at each other.
“Best story yet,” Celia told her sister.
“Well worth the journey,” Leia agreed as they left.
I finally looked up at Lee, “But I really did check to see if you were dead.”
“Did you try a pulse?” Lee teased me.
I shook my head. “No.”
“I don’t suggest anything in the medical field.” He laughed wearily. “Everything's okay. Home’s being fixed up and the palace is supplying a real guard for us. Just about all of the raiders were detained, and there’s more than enough information to find the village this stemmed from. Things are starting to look up.”
“I’m glad you’re not dead,” I replied, burying my face into his side. “How did you know where to look?”
“I remembered that one day you were looking at the map and which towns you pointed out. When Leia came to help and we were explaining the story and where we thought you were, she was able to confirm that she knew where you were. Lucky us you somehow ended up staying with her sister. It made getting you to stay put a lot easier, and we didn’t have to involve anyone else in a search.”
“I still don’t know how my magic didn’t kill you. It flared out a second time after I thought you were gone.” My voice was muffled, but he understood.
“With all the practice I’ve had, it may have been an instinctive response. Magic often does its own thing.” Lee yawned. “Either way you look at it, I’m alive and you’ve got a lot of magic to work on controlling, but you did really well. You got us out of a bad situation. I thank you for that. We just need to work on this habit of running away.”
“You would have run too.” That may not have been true but it was my best response.
He held me tightly for a while, not saying anything.
Finally the women returned and set up dinner. There wasn’t much talking, but I knew they were ready to pry. I still didn’t know what to say. Instead Juni talked about the village’s repair efforts and the help the extra guards were putting into rebuilding.
After dinner we were left to ourselves once more and I had a feeling I knew what was coming.
“I don’t know if I should go back to the village after all that’s happened,” I told Lee.
He nodded. “Then don’t go back.”
I looked at the floor, “I think I’d like you to come with me though.” Aside from his stubbornness, we’d likely be great traveling companions.
“I had hoped as much.” He smiled and gave me a tight hug. “I’ve got so many new ideas about how to help you with controlling your magic now too. I’ve had a lot of down time to just think. Not to mention you’ll probably want someone to come with you to meet your family.”
“What?” I pushed away from him in surprise. That had taken an unexpected turn.
“They’re looking for you everywhere. I’m surprised you hadn’t heard. After everything that happened at my village they have solid confirmation you’re alive. They want to see you again, and have stated they want you to rejoin the family.”
“I don’t know if that’s what I want.” I shook my head. There was too much going on and one hugely emotional event was more than enough for me to handle in one night.
“You don’t have to rejoin them, but seeing them would be good for both sides. Mend the past and it can finally be where it belongs. Nightmares won’t leave you when there’s something still tying you to them.” He responded firmly.
“I hate that you’re probably right,” I sighed trying to be open to the suggestion. It all came back down to the fact that I was still cursed. “But not until my magic is actually under control.”
“Won’t it be great shaking your brother and sister's hands? That’d be a nice family meeting. That should be the goal.” He beamed at the idea.
“Well, yeah, that is the overarching goal....” Defined goals couldn’t hurt right?
“Then for the second goal!” He smiled.
“What’s that?” I asked, unsure where he was going with this. He had had too much time to think about all of this.
“You’ll go on a date with me.”
I stared at him baffled for a moment and then just laughed. Seeing as he had survived me at my worst state, maybe that could be a possible future. However, there was still too much else to work on to worry about silly things like that.
Lee smiled blissfully, not feeling any sting of defeat in my reaction. “Obviously this magic problem’s been going on too long. I think we can solve that in no time now. Then we can worry about all the rest of that lame stuff people like doing in life.”
I had to smile and shake my head at his phrasing. “Yes, all that ‘lame stuff’. Guess it’s decided then,” I agreed. A date wouldn’t hurt anything, since apparently I couldn’
t easily or accidentally kill him. At this point I still highly doubted any of my problems would be solved on the magic end in the near future.
“Awesome, but we’ll start tomorrow. Traveling was a lot tougher than I thought,” Lee said, stretching out. The plans for our journey appeared to be already set in his mind.
“I bet your mother wasn’t happy with your decision to take off so soon.” Even with the help of a healer, healing still took a lot of time.
“Of course not. She wanted me to wait at least another week, but aside from that, she liked the idea. She was really disappointed that you had assumed the worst case scenario had come to pass, but I couldn’t blame you. With your luck it would have been easier to jump to that conclusion than to think there were other options.”
It was true. It was easier to believe he had died since everyone else who was exposed to my magic had. Maybe I should have checked with a healer first, but those thoughts never came to mind. “Yes, yes, don’t become a healer.” I rolled my eyes, expecting him to joke about it once more.
“Have you considered herding sheep? You might like it,” he offered instead.
“I’ve considered punching your sarcastic face, but that’d be in bad taste.” I paused, “And I think I’d cry.” It wasn’t a lie. For once luck had been on my side, and I was glad to see he was alive.
He squeezed my arm. “Not going anywhere.”
Chapter 20
The next morning we got started on our plans right away, before anyone could scold us. Lee knew he would have to take it easy, but with all of his recent ideas, I was curious to see how they would play out. We sat on the grass out in the back yard holding hands, ready to begin.