My Daddy Is a Hero

by Lena Derhally

  Chapter 15

  “Ready to be home with Chris and the girls”

  August 12, the last day of Shanann’s, Bella’s, and CeCe’s lives, seemed like a typical day. Shanann woke up, and before anything else, sent Chris a text saying, “Good morning baby. Love you.”

  Although she was with Addy in Arizona, Shanann texted her afterward, telling her she had a lot of work to do for the week because she wanted to go completely offline when she and Chris went to Aspen. Shanann was often glued to her phone, but she knew her relationship with Chris needed 110 percent of her attention.

  Before starting her day with her Le-Vel crew in Arizona, she checked in with Chris again, asking how the girls were. He told her they were drinking shakes. Shanann told him she missed them and asked Chris to give the girls kisses from her.

  Cassie’s husband, Josh, also texted Chris that afternoon. Most likely, he was aware of the issues Chris and Shanann were having and all the talk of selling the house and downsizing. Josh, Cassie, and their young children had plans to move to Colorado, and they had arranged to stay with Chris and Shanann until they got settled. This was normal for Chris and Shanann to have house guests long term. As stated earlier, Shanann’s parents lived with them for a while, and Shanann’s good friend, Cristina, and her daughter moved in with them to help after Shanann had neck surgery.

  Josh asked Chris if it was still cool for their family to stay with them when they arrived in Colorado. Chris, always the people pleaser, said of course it was. When Josh asked him how the Rockies game was, Chris lied once again and told him it was “epic.”

  Shanann had been doing some introspection and trying to think of things she could change about herself to make the relationship better. She was invested in making her husband happy, and she was trying to dig deep to figure out what she could do to improve the situation.

  She texted Addy again. “l need to do better with my calendar! I don’t block out family time, I fill in family time. He said to me last night it has nothing to do with business though.”

  Addy told Shanann she agreed and that Shanann needed to make more time for the family.

  “No, I agree. I think its itty-bitty things. I sometimes can be bitchy, and he gets that side of me. I know l tend to make him feel like he isn’t able to do things because I have control issues. He said the other night he wishes I’d just let him hang up a picture, he also never calls me out. He never fights me, just goes with flow. He knows I like things done a certain way, but I never thought about how that may make him feel as a man. I don’t even know if this is what’s bothering him. He still hasn’t said! I’m praying he wrote me a letter like I asked since he can express himself better in a letter than talking. I’m the pusher and he’s the withdrawer. He has strengths that are my weaknesses and vice versa. The lack of communication isn’t on my part. I can be better at how I communicate, but he doesn’t communicate! I say things sometimes just to get him to react in any way since he doesn’t react and that’s not good. It’s not even all the time. 99% of the time we are perfectly fine. And we have never ever fought. Literally over anything serious. I have fought with him over stupid shit like not doing something I asked in a timely manner. I did belittle him without realizing it with his parents. Told him he needed to find his balls and protect his family. He is submissive when his parents are involved.”

  There is a little clue in this statement from Shanann about Chris’s personality. She mentions that in order to get her husband to react, she has to say things to try to rile him up. She needed more emotion from him, but she didn’t realize that she was dealing with someone who was probably void of real emotions and attachment.

  Addy told Shanann that being submissive was just who Chris was. She added, “He would kill for you.”

  Shanann told Addy, “Told him in a letter I would for him and there has to be mutual respect. I did respect his parents enough to deal with them. His mom just didn’t and when alone with me jabs at me... it’s not fair... I mean fuck, I agreed to spend 5 weeks with both parents. That’s hell for me. But I did it for him and kids”

  Shanann continued, “He was NEVER close to anyone but his dad. I, being the family person tried bringing them closer and it backfired... I need to feel like he will stand up for us faced with difficult situations... that’s his flaw... or weakness. My weakness is I have an Italian temper that can’t hold back when pissed... I’m a fixer and I want to talk this out and he just wants to work it out in his head. I’ve just been acting kind of normal. Morning baby, love you, etc., but not over doing it... Over doing it is what we do. We are so affectionate, can’t stop touching each other, etc. not just the sex but the touch.”

  This is one reason it was impossible for Shanann to know what her husband was capable of. He was consistently affectionate with her. She felt loved, appreciated, and cherished for most of their marriage.

  Before Shanann met up with friends for the day, she texted Chris asking him if he would get the girls’ backpacks ready for their first day of school the next day. He said he would, knowing full well that he wouldn’t need to. Shanann also asked for photos of the girls. Chris obliged and sent her one photo of Bella and one photo of CeCe. Later Shanann checked in at the girls’ naptime and told Chris that if he was available, she would love to talk to him. He never called or returned her message.

  When the girls woke up from the nap, Chris took them to Jeremy Lindstrom’s house for his son’s birthday party. The girls had fun playing in the inflatable pools with the other kids. Chris was acting normal to everyone at the party, and, as usual, he was attentive to the girls. But his mind was on more than his daughters. He knew this was his last day with them.

  While at the party, he texted back and forth with Nikki. She had spent the day with her family, and he texted to her, “Nice!! That sounds like a good time! I haven’t seen IMAX in a while. Sounds like you’re having a fun day with the folks! I’m still at the bday party. Kids are soaked from water balloons.”

  An hour later, he went back to texting about his favorite topic, what he had been eating. “Been pounding fruit and had a whole jar of asparagus. He didn’t smoke any bbq this time. He did hot dogs, so I did the fruit and veggies.” The messages were banal and surprisingly normal, considering Chris would murder his family less than twenty-four hours after texting these messages from a child’s birthday party.

  CeCe fell and hurt herself during the party. She was crying, and Chris ran over to console her. Nobody would have sensed anything was amiss. He seemed totally normal to everyone who interacted with him, chatting about Shanann’s pregnancy and the gender reveal party (that Shanann had canceled). He mentioned it would be cool to have a boy and said he was excited to find out the sex—even though he already knew it was a boy at this point. Shanann checked in again, asking if the girls were having fun at the party. Chris said they were. When Shanann responded with “love you,” Chris didn’t respond. He was finished pretending.

  At 5 pm that evening, Chris’ co-worker Kodi Roberts, was surprised to get a text from Chris, which was unusual on weekends.

  “I have the whip checks for the Cervi 6-29. I’m gonna go straight out there from my house in the morning. I will look at that 3-19 as well and run the 11-29 if you want?” Chris said.

  “l was going to head out there first thing tomorrow to check out the 3-19. Did Troy talk to you about what I had found out there Friday afternoon??” Kodi asked.

  “Yup. I was standing right next to him LOL... l was giving him a Firestick to look at... I can go out there though. No sense in both of us going out there LOL.”

  “Alright sounds good man,” Kodi replied. “I appreciate it. I think I still have a couple Konys left out there. I can let you know in the morning. And let me know if you find anything at the 3-19. If not, we may pressure test that BP line and see if it’s leaking underground.”

  On a normal day, Chris would almost always head to th
e office before doing a site visit. In this exchange, he was orchestrating a scenario where he would be out in the oil fields alone so he could dispose of the bodies of his family.

  Still in Arizona, Shanann, Addy, Nicki, and another friend, Cindy, headed to dinner at 5:30 pm. Right before they left, Shanann made a quick Facebook post, sharing her excitement. “Felt the baby move twice this weekend!” Even though Shanann’s Facebook posts sounded upbeat, she wasn’t acting like herself at dinner. She wasn’t feeling well, but she was also still distraught and worried about the state of her marriage. She confided in the small group about her worries as she sipped on ice water with lemon and picked at her chicken Caesar salad. She told them about the strange credit card charge at The Lazy Dog restaurant for $62 that Chris said was for a beer and salmon. She also mentioned her concerns about his possible infidelity but didn’t think that could be the case because Chris had “no game.”

  She told her friends she was going to have another talk with him upon her return, although it would have to wait until the next day because her flight would land too late, and he would be asleep. She said she planned on putting her arm around him in bed when she got home. She wanted to make a simple gesture of affection toward him since they had almost no physical touch recently. The sudden shift of always being physically affectionate to nothing was jarring and unsettling.

  In general, Shanann’s friends had been concerned about her in Arizona because she wasn’t acting like herself. She wasn’t eating or drinking enough water, and they tried making sure she was getting proper fluids, so she didn’t dehydrate.

  It was a great dinner, and the women were so happy to be together celebrating such close-knit bonds. If there was ever a time in Shanann’s life where she had found her “tribe,” it was in this season of her life, and she didn’t take any of it for granted.

  Shanann and Nicki left for the airport, only to find out that their flight was delayed due to storms. Shanann was anxious to get back home and to see if Chris had read her letter and responded. She was ready to go to Aspen and begin repairing the relationship. The utter confusion and helplessness she had felt the entire summer was something she was ready to leave behind in the dust. She wanted to move forward, and she wanted to do it quickly. She knew something was wrong, but she didn’t know what or how to fix it. That was torture for Shanann. She was a fixer.

  She texted Chris to ask if the kids were in bed and asked for more photos. Chris had fed the girls cold pizza and candy. He and the girls Facetimed with Shannan’s father Frank. It was 7:45, and Bella had just gone to bed. Bedtime was normally at 7 pm, but she missed her mom and knew she was coming home that evening. Chris told her she would see her mom in the morning, even though he knew she wouldn’t see her mother alive ever again. He also sent Shanann one last picture of Bella, taken earlier in the day at the birthday party. Chris told Cadle in a letter that he was fully aware it would be the last time he would put his children to bed, saying: “August 12th when I finished putting the girls to bed, I walked away and said ‘’That’s the last time I’m going to be tucking my babies in.’’ I knew what was going to happen the day before and I did nothing to stop it!’

  “The power went out in the restaurant when we were there,” Shanann texted, sending Chris a photo of a dark restaurant. “Great job on Bella’s hair!” she added, referencing the picture he had sent of Bella in her party dress, her hair up in little pigtails.

  “That sucks! Yea, she cooperated,” he answered back.

  “Really bad dust storm, rain, thunder, and lightning. Praying it doesn’t cancel flight. Addy’s flight was cancelled this morning,” she said, trying to make normal conversation with her husband. Things hadn’t been normal for a while now, and she was probably craving normalcy again.

  She decided instead of texting, she would pick up and call him, just to chat. She would not have thought twice about doing that before, but now she felt as if she were walking on eggshells. The call didn’t go as she had hoped. She turned to her friend Nicki.

  “He was short with me,” she said glumly. “I think he was working out.”

  Wanting to smooth things over and feeling hyper aware of her every move, she texted him. “Sorry I bothered you. I just wanted to talk to you.”

  Shanann then texted Addy and told her she could call Chris because he was still awake. Chris gave Addy mechanical advice for her car, and Shanann texted him, trying to show her appreciation. “Thank you for taking good care of the girls this weekend so I can learn and work,” she wrote. “I appreciate it!”

  Chris got off the phone with Addy and responded to Shanann, “You’re welcome! I just talked to Addy.”

  Shanann, always organized, was already thinking of meal planning for the week.

  “What kind of vegetables do you want with dinner tomorrow?” she asked Chris, assuming the week would be a completely normal one.

  “Green beans,” he replied.

  “I’m ready to be home. I’m ready for bed,” she texted, exhausted.

  While waiting for updates on the status of her flight, she texted Addy again. Her mind was obsessing over the talk she planned on having with Chris.

  “This is what I’m planning on sharing with Chris tomorrow night when we talk: Can you please tell me something, because just like you, I’m in my head? I try to fix things and make them better and this is making me crazy. I know that you need time. I want to give you what you’re asking for and respect your space. I need some time. This place that I’m in, in my head, is not a good place. It is not healthy for me, or Nico. I need you to help me help you. I need you to give just a little bit of what I did, or didn’t do, so I’m not going crazy in my head to figure it out. I know I can’t fix this by myself; that, we are going to have to work together.”

  At 9:28 pm, Shanann called Chris to try to give him an update on her delayed flight. He didn’t pick up, but he did call Nikki a minute later and spoke to her on the phone for almost two hours. While they were talking, Shanann texted him again at 9:44 pm: “Tried calling you to give you update. Was starting to board and they announced that our crew isn’t here yet and it’s going to be a minimum of an hour before they are here.”

  Shortly after 11 pm, Shanann made the last Facebook post of her life, sharing her flight info with the message, “Ready to be home with Chris and the girls.”

  After Chris got off the phone with Nikki, close to 11:30 pm, he texted Shanann back, lying to her. “Holy crap. Sorry, I passed out on the couch. That’s gonna be late.” This was the last text exchange between the couple while Shanann was alive.

  Chapter 16

  “Mommy doesn’t feel good.”

  **Before reading any farther, the reader should be warned that the content in this chapter is disturbing and depicts the murder of Shanann and her daughters. It may be wise for some readers to skip this chapter. It should also be stated that the events portrayed in this chapter are Chris’s version of what happened. This chapter is based on his interview from prison with law enforcement, his letters with Cheryln Cadle, and the evidence in the police discovery. Chris has changed his story and contradicted himself numerous times, but this is the only account we have to go on. Readers can decide for themselves what they believe. Regardless of what truly happened, what Chris has testified to and, in all versions of the story, is beyond evil.

  Around 1:50 am, Nicki watched Shanann walk inside her house and close the door behind her. Shanann, wearing jeans, a black cardigan and gray T-shirt that had the word “love” on it in pink letters entered her home that was mostly dark except for the lights on the porch. She kicked off her favorite black flips flops and left them by the door with her suitcase.

  Exhausted, she made her way upstairs to the master bedroom, shed her clothes, pulled on a purple T-shirt and crawled into bed next to Chris. Chris had been sleeping in the basement since the family had returned from North Carolina, but he was in the master bedroom
this evening.

  According to statements by Chris, this is what happened next. Soon after she snuggled under the bed covers, she put her arm around Chris. She started caressing his hand and chest. Although it had been months since they had been intimate, and Chris had been rejecting sex, he was receptive to Shanann’s advances this time. This was the first time Chris had been sexually intimate with his wife since he started sleeping with Nikki.

  Chris knew what he had to do to take care of the mess. He’d found it easy to shower Nikki with attention when Shanann and the girls were away, but now he wouldn’t be able to see her at all if he was still living under the same roof as his family. He felt Shanann would keep him from being with Nikki, and the only way he felt he could be with her was if he killed his family.

  Chris knew he would go through with his plan. Even though he had enjoyed the previous day alone with his daughters, laughing, playing, and singing with them, he still had no desire to stop his evil plan from happening. In his letter to Cadle, he claims he went to Bella’s room, then CeCe’s, took the pillows from their beds and smothered them. Then believing they were dead, he was ready to talk to Shanann. The affair with Nikki, the anger and disappointment of the drama with his family and Shanann over the years, and his inability to deal with emotional problems all boiled to the surface.

  He crawled back into the large mahogany four-poster bed and decided to have the talk with Shanann. He planned on telling her he was leaving her and no longer loved her. It is strange and incredibly cruel to think that, knowing he was going to kill her, he still wanted to make her suffer emotionally before he took her life.

  Shanann had married Chris partially because he was a safe choice. He was always loyal, devoted, and submissive. They never fought. Chris rarely raised his voice. He was so easy going. Shanann thought they would be together forever. Shanann had given everything to Chris as a wife. They had always been so happy. Her own anger, despair, and sadness came to the surface all at once.