by J. L. Wilder
“I feel like I’m losing my mind,” she murmured. “God, Wyatt, just the smell of you right now.”
“Thirdly,” he went on, “even if you did want to have sex all the time, that’s your business, and it’s no reason for them to disparage you.”
“How do you know so much about this Wolf Moon stuff?” she asked. “I thought you had never known an omega before me.”
“I haven’t. But I read. Once I met you, once I realized what you meant to me, I started studying up on omegas. There’s so much myth out there because omegas are so rare. Many of our kind go through life without ever meeting one. But there are some out there, of course, and accounts of them have been written.”
She felt a rush of love. “You read about omegas because of me? Really?”
“I wanted to make sure I knew everything I would need to take care of you,” he said. “I wanted to have the best chance I could at helping you to be happy here.”
She kissed him. “I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t joined the pack when you did,” she said. “I don’t know how I would have survived.”
“You would have. You’re stronger than you think you are.”
Izzy wasn’t so sure—she didn’t feel very strong most of the time—but she loved him for saying so. She leaned in to kiss him again.
Her lips met empty air.
A moment later, she realized why. Faster than she would have believed possible, especially for a man of his age, Wyatt had jumped to his feet. He stood in a low crouch, his head cocked, listening.
“Shhh,” he whispered.
Izzy felt no desire to disobey. A bolt of panic shot through her. Wyatt bent low again. “I heard someone. A footstep.”
“Where?”
“The second-floor landing, I think.”
“What do we do?”
“I’ll go upstairs,” he said. “I can go out the window and climb down the tree, and then I’ll come in from the garage.”
“You can’t climb out the third floor—”
“Shh! We don’t have a choice. You go down. You can pretend you were looking for something in your old room, if you’re caught.” His hands found her body and explored briefly, setting rumpled clothing to rights, tugging her skirt so it hung evenly. He lingered over her curves for just a moment, and even through her fear she felt a twinge of arousal. “Go now,” he said, pushing her gently toward the door that opened on the second floor.
She opened her mouth to argue, but he was already gone.
Izzy patted her hair straight and descended the steps, trying to look as if nothing out of the ordinary were going on. Let it be Val, she thought desperately. Val had always been a little kinder to her than most of the others, leaving magazines on her bed when the rest of the girls had finished with them and voluntarily taking the seat next to Izzy at the breakfast table when nobody else would. She had an idea that Val wouldn’t interrogate her if she caught her doing something suspicious.
Before she could summon her courage to leave the stairway, however, the door swung open.
There was no mistaking the squat, muscular figure on the other side.
Even in the low light, she could see that his eyes were narrowed. “What are you doing here?” he asked. “People are looking for you.”
“I—” She remember what Wyatt had told her. “I had a coin. A lucky penny, from my mother. I think it must have fallen out of my pocket when I was in the upstairs room. I thought I’d go see if it was still there.”
“You’re not supposed to go anywhere alone,” he pointed out.
“I’m sorry. I won’t again.”
There was a long silence. She felt as if he was analyzing every word she’d said, picking her story apart, looking for lies.
“Let’s go look for your coin then,” he said after a pause.
Would Wyatt have gotten out yet? “I already checked. It isn’t there.”
Gunner inhaled deeply, and his eyes narrowed even further.
“You smell like sex,” he said.
Panic, hot like electricity. “The Wolf Moon is coming,” she whispered. “I’ll be in heat soon.”
“Where’s Wyatt?”
It seemed to take forever to unstick her tongue from the roof of her mouth. “I haven’t seen him.”
Gunner stared at her. His expression was full of rage, and for a moment she thought he might actually hit her. “I know you’re up to something.”
Wordless, at the end of her capacity for speech, she merely shook her head.
Gunner turned and stormed away, leaving the door to the landing open behind him.
Izzy collapsed to sit on a step, trembling.
Chapter Thirteen
IZZY
Fear had left her exhausted, and after having dinner with the rest of the pack, Izzy decided to go to bed early. For once, she had the entire room to herself, and she took her time changing into pajamas and choosing a book to read. But once she was in bed, she found she couldn’t shake the feeling of uneasiness that had been following her all evening.
What would happen if Gunner knew something? He had almost caught them today. In her desperation and need, she had been too careless. She should never have approached Wyatt the way she had, in that stairwell. It might have been rarely used—no one ever went up to the third floor anymore—but they were in a house full of wolves, for God’s sake. Anybody could smell something suspicious and decide to investigate.
They had been lucky. Shockingly lucky. But they might not be lucky again.
Maybe I shouldn’t go to him again, she thought, flipping her pillow to the cool side and turning over restlessly. Her book lay forgotten on her nightstand. Maybe he was right all along. We’re taking too great a risk. His odds of winning the games might not be ideal, but if they catch us together, he won’t even be allowed to compete. Then we’ll have no chance.
She brought her palm to her cheek and closed her eyes, remembering when his hand had rested there and how comforting that had been. Someday, she told herself, they would share more than stolen moments in stairwells and garages. They would share a bed. She would be able to fall asleep in his arms, knowing that no one could ever tear them apart.
If he wins the Games. What if Gunner wins?
It was her greatest fear, and no matter how many times she tried to force her mind away from it, her thoughts kept returning to the same place. If Gunner won the Games, there would be no reason to go on living. She would be torn apart from Wyatt, the only man she had ever loved. She would have to live in the same home with him, see him every day, and never touch him. She would become the veritable property of the man she hated and feared most, a man who was likely to treat her with disrespect, cruelty, and possibly even violence.
I’ll run, she swore to herself. If it comes to that, I’ll run away. Wyatt would help me run.
But that would mean leaving him behind forever.
There was nothing to do but wait, she knew. Either Wyatt would win the Games, and everything would be wonderful, or he would lose and her world would be destroyed.
And she couldn’t do anything about it.
She was still awake when the others began to come in for bed, though she feigned sleep to avoid having to speak to anyone. Her nervousness about Gunner, and about what the future held, kept her from aching for Wyatt as she had every other night this week. It was a small relief in the midst of all her fear. She wished they could run away, just the two of them, and leave the Hell’s Wolves behind forever. She wouldn’t miss anyone, she thought, not the women who seemed to resent her very presence and certainly not the men who thought they had the right to compete over her body.
We’d get away on his motorcycle, she thought. The wind in our hair would tell us we were free. I’d hold onto him, my arms around his waist, and he’d keep us steady as we rode. When night fell we’d take a room at a motel and make love for hours, and we wouldn’t have to worry about how loud we were being or whether anyone would walk in. Our lives would finall
y be our own.
She fell asleep still thinking about the fantasy, and it carried her into dreams. She was kissing Wyatt, and they were making love, and she was chasing an orgasm that refused to come. It felt like nothing would ever be enough to satisfy her. In the dream she tipped her head, exposing her neck, and he nipped her gently, staking his claim to her as he never had in life. It was enough to push her over the edge, and she awoke, shaking, in a beam of pale sunlight.
It was barely morning. The sun was still low in the sky, and everyone around her was still asleep. She sat up slowly, thinking carefully about the details of the dream, fixing them in her mind so they wouldn’t slip away and be forgotten. She wanted to hold onto every moment. Wyatt might never claim her like that, but last night he had, and it had been the most wonderful thing she had ever experienced. She would have given anything for the dream to be real.
She got to her feet, meaning to go down and see about an early breakfast. Lena usually started cooking at dawn. But she had barely gotten to her feet when a wave of nausea swept over her. She clapped a hand to her mouth, managed not to vomit, and sprinted for the bathroom. Moments later she was hunched over the toilet, her face drenched in sweat, every muscle trembling.
There was a knock on the door.
“Just a minute,” she managed, and reached up to flush away the mess. She got to her feet, slowly this time, and went to the sink to splash some water on her face. Her skin was pale, her eyes shining, but she felt much better now. In fact, she realized suddenly, she was ravenous.
She opened the door. Heather pushed past her, a tampon in hand and an irritated look on her face. She slammed the door behind her, leaving Izzy out in the hall.
Izzy was halfway back to the bedroom before the picture came together in her mind. I’m late, she realized. My period. It should have been this week.
Her thoughts were coming a mile a minute now. She hadn’t always been safe with Wyatt. She’d tried, of course, but as her need for him had grown more powerful, she hadn’t always been able to think logically. It was as if the animal in her had ruled during those times, and what did a wolf care if her partner used a condom. The wolf wanted to get pregnant. The wolf didn’t worry about Omega Games or what the pack would do to her and Wyatt when they found out—which was inevitable now. The wolf wanted a litter. And the omega wolf probably wanted that more than any other.
Of course, this happened. How could I have been so stupid?
And yet...
Had she been stupid? If she was honest with herself, didn’t her human aspect want exactly the same things as her wolf self? Hadn’t she longed to mate with Wyatt and bear his children? She had never let herself dwell on it, knowing how impossible it was for now. But when she closed her eyes and pictured the future, she saw herself on Wyatt’s arm and a litter of children around their feet.
She touched her belly wonderingly. A pregnancy would cause no end of problems, she knew, both for her and for Wyatt. There was no telling what the pack would do when they found out, and there was no way she could keep it hidden for long. But she found she couldn’t wish it undone. I’m carrying Wyatt’s pups, she thought to herself, and the idea filled her with joy and pride.
She had to let him know.
She hoped he wouldn’t be upset. Wyatt tended to worry more than she did, and lately that was saying something. She knew his concern was centered on a fear that something terrible would happen to her if it was discovered that she was breaking pack rules. And he might be right about that. But she’d still have the babies, and the babies would tie her to Wyatt in a way that nothing else ever could. What could they really do to her now?
They couldn’t force me to terminate, could they?
She shuddered at the thought. This was Wyatt’s litter. If the pack found out about it and forced her to get rid of it...she couldn’t think about it. And if that did happen, she knew they would never let the two of them close enough together to conceive again. They would never have another chance.
I have to protect these babies, she thought fiercely. I can’t let anything happen to them.
WYATT
It was starting to bother Wyatt that he hadn’t seen Izzy in so long. On one hand, he knew, it was probably for the best that she stays away. There had been too many close calls lately, and what had happened last night in the stairwell had been enough to scare Wyatt into not trying to get her alone today. Instead, he’d retreated to the garage, a place of sanctuary, to work on his bike.
The trouble was, his bike didn’t need any work.
Wyatt had been sitting out here for hours now, touching up every little thing on the bike he could think of and waiting for the time to pass. Now he was measuring the tire pressure for the third time, even though the first two measurements had matched each other. He didn’t want to go back inside and deal with the rest of the pack. He didn’t want to see Gunner’s accusing eyes or the little smirk he’d been wearing for the past couple of days. He didn’t want to face Robert and have to think about the ways he’d lied to and betrayed his alpha. And he especially didn’t want to see Izzy.
He didn’t know if he was strong enough to keep his hands off her.
That’s exactly what Gunner’s been saying, isn’t it? That I’m not strong enough?
He knew Gunner’s suggestion that he sit out of the Omega Games was a bad one. He would lose nothing in the games that he wouldn’t also lose by bowing out. That would show Robert and the rest of the pack that he was too afraid to compete. And it didn’t matter anyway. He didn’t care about being the pack beta. The only thing that mattered was Izzy.
He loved that she seemed to have so much confidence in him. It made him feel stronger. Braver. But he still didn’t think he could win. Gunner was right, unfortunately. Wyatt was old and past his prime. What kind of physical challenge could he possibly hope to do well in?
Hell, he couldn’t even manage to resist the house omega. He was the only one who had weakened that far.
It’s different, he told himself. I love her. I’m in love with her.
The door to the garage swung open suddenly. Wyatt was so surprised that he almost dropped his tire pressure gauge.
Val was standing in the doorway, with Izzy beside her. “She wants to hang out here,” Val said, unprompted. “Is that okay?”
He knew he should say no, but the battle was lost. It had been lost the moment he’d first laid eyes on her. “Sure.”
Val went back inside. Izzy turned over a bucket and sat down beside him. “Hi.”
“Hey. Are you okay? We haven’t talked since last night. I was starting to worry.”
“I’m okay.”
“Did anyone see you?”
She nodded. “Gunner.”
Wyatt sucked in a breath.
“He suspects.”
“Then, we have to stop.”
“Wyatt...”
“At least for now. At least until the Games. We have to, Izzy.”
“I can’t.” Her eyes were bright with tears. “Wyatt, I need you.”
“It’s not too much longer,” he said, reaching out to grip her shoulder. Seeing her cry like this pained him. “But if Gunner thinks he knows something...Izzy, he was already suspicious of us. He was already watching. If we give him a reason to watch more closely...we just have to make sure he doesn’t find anything. Then I can compete in the Games, and I can win. And then we’ll be together. We won’t have to hide anymore.”
“I want to believe that,” she said.
“You can,” Wyatt assured her, trying to project more confidence than he felt into his voice. “Trust me, all right, we’re going to be okay. It’s just a matter of time now.”
She took a deep breath. “Wyatt, I’m pregnant.”
He thought, at first, that he must have misheard her. “You’re what?”
“I’m pregnant.”
He looked up at her. The first few tears had finally spilled down her cheeks, and her chin was quivering. She looked like she might break
down at any moment.
She can’t be pregnant, was his first thought, and although he knew it was stupid, he clung to it momentarily. This would ruin everything. He should have known something would go wrong. He had known it, hadn’t he? He’d told himself over and over that he needed to stay away from her, and he’d simply failed to do it.
And now they were both reaping the consequences. It was no more than they deserved.
He should be able to take her in his arms right now, he thought bitterly. He should be able to comfort her and tell her that everything would be all right. He would have loved to be a family, to raise pups with her. He thought of her eight months from now, her belly swollen and full. He imagined himself caring for her in the final months of her pregnancy. It couldn’t be, and that made him want to snap the pressure gauge in his hand in half.
“You’re angry,” she whispered.
He looked up at her, and his heart nearly broke. Despite their circumstances, she had brought him this news with hope. She had believed, he saw, that he would think of something she hadn’t, and that somehow together they would make the best of this.
He reached out, as he should have done from the beginning, and pulled her close. She melted into him, crying into his grease stained shirt, shivering against him. “What are we going to do, Wyatt?”
He longed to give her an answer, to give her the comfort she needed so badly, but he couldn’t lie to her. “I don’t know.”
“We can’t let them hurt our babies.”
“We won’t,” he promised. “We’ll keep them safe.”
“How?”
“I’ll do whatever it takes.” He knew as he said it that it was true. He would go to war over this. He would fight any member of the pack who tried to touch Izzy. A fire had been lit within him like nothing he’d ever felt before, and suddenly the Omega Games didn’t seem so far out of reach. The way he was feeling now, he probably could win. Gunner wouldn’t stand a chance against the fire that was in him now.