by Amanda Renee
By the time they returned to the horse trailers, volunteers had erected a temporary chute and holding pen. Ryder recognized some people, including Belle Barnes. Or rather Belle Barnes-Slade since she had married his brother Harlan last summer. She waved and smiled—a genuine smile—in his direction as she continued talking to Dr. Lydia Presley, Saddle Ridge’s resident large animal veterinarian.
“This will give us a chance to assess each horse without traumatizing them further than they’ve already been,” Nate explained. “You should have seen the pens they were in. They could barely move. They had trampled fallen weaker horses and babies to death.”
The sound of horse whinnies and loud thumps filled the air as the horses moved around in the trailers.
“We’re ready!” Lydia’s husband, Calvin, shouted to Nate above the noise.
“Let’s do this.” Nate waved his hat, signaling for them to open the first trailer’s door. Huddled together, the horses hesitated to break from the herd. Everyone fell silent and remained still as a bay-colored stallion gingerly stepped onto the ramp. His eyes blazed wild with fear as he snorted and stomped his hoof. “You can do it,” Nate whispered. “Show them how it’s done.”
The mustang took another cautious step, giving Lydia a chance to look him over from her side while Calvin did the same from the other. After an approving nod from both, Belle reached through the tubular rails and lightly tapped the horse’s rump, causing him to move forward.
Silently, they quickly checked each horse from the first trailer and then moved on to the next. By the time the sun dipped beneath the horizon, they’d off-loaded and freed the final mustang in the south pasture. The rumble of hooves against the ground sounded better than any song Ryder had ever heard on the radio. He’d been a part of something big. Larger than he’d experienced before. Even though he only had a couple dollars to his name and Tori probably wouldn’t be able to pay him much of anything after today, it didn’t matter. They had saved eighty-two lives. And he’d continue to be a part of their progress as he gained their trust.
The sanctuary strived to train, rehabilitate and adopt out as many wild horses as possible so they could live a full and happy life. Tori and Nate had both warned Ryder his job wouldn’t be easy, and he had to admit, the prospect almost seemed daunting. The only experience these horses had had with humans to date had been cruel and inhumane. He’d trained a handful of mustangs before with some success, but this time his life depended on it. They needed one another.
“It’s good to see you again.”
Ryder jumped at the sound of Belle’s voice behind him. He turned to face her, glad that at least one member of his family was talking to him. “You too, Belle.”
She reached up and gave him a hug, holding him tight to her. “Welcome home.”
Ryder squeezed his eyes shut. Outside of a single hug from Tori the day of his release from jail, a handshake from Nate and Chelsea’s sympathetic gesture yesterday, he hadn’t felt a genuine human touch since his arrest. “Thank you.”
She released him and patted the side of his cheek. “You look good. I know it’s Friday night and all, but if you don’t already have other plans, I’d like you to swing by the house for dinner and see your niece and nephew. Ivy’s eight now and Travis is five-and-a-half months old.”
He gave her a small smile, touched at the invite. “I don’t think Harlan would approve. I haven’t seen or heard from him.”
Belle furrowed her brows. “Harlan’s been away for over a week at a police training seminar. It came up last minute. He wasn’t supposed to go until next month, but someone got sick and he went in their place. I guess he had no way of reaching you before your...your release. He doesn’t get home until later tonight. It would be such a great surprise for him when he walks through the door.”
Good grief, does she ever come up for air? Ryder tried not to laugh, but he couldn’t. “Oh, Belle, it’s nice to see some things haven’t changed. You’re still the chatterbox I remember.”
“Ryder Slade, that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me considering you tried to drown me in Flathead Lake when we were kids.”
Ryder laughed so hard he snorted. “I did, didn’t I. Sorry, kiddo. And yes, I’d love to come to dinner. Are you still a vegan?”
“You know that will never change.”
Ryder walked Belle to her truck. “Let me take a quick shower and then I’ll be there. I’m assuming the address hasn’t changed.”
“No, it hasn’t.” Belle reached out and gave his hand a sympathetic squeeze. “If there’s a special someone you’d like to invite, you’re more than welcome to.”
“What?” Chelsea’s angelic face immediately came to mind after pushing her from his thoughts all afternoon. “I got out of prison a week and a half ago. I assure you there is no one in my life.”
“Hmm. Lydia said someone told her you and Chelsea Logan were all cuddly in town yesterday.”
“Wow. Rumors spread faster here than they do in the state pen. Chelsea’s and Tori’s daughters are friends. I’ve only seen her twice. Once here and once in town. We’ve had a couple brief conversations, and that’s it.” Then why did the memory of her warm, soft skin beneath his make the hair on the back of his neck stand at attention? “She’s way out of my league.”
“From what I hear, Chelsea’s extremely down to earth. I don’t know her personally, but she has a stellar reputation. She does a lot of pro bono work for single parents and families who can’t afford representation.”
“Thank you for the info.” Ryder cleared his throat. “But I’ll pass. I have too much baggage to empty first.”
“I’m assuming some of that baggage is your family.” Belle slid behind the wheel of her truck. “I can’t speak for Dylan, Garrett or Wes but you don’t have to worry about your relationship with Harlan. He knows it was an accident.”
And Harlan had also questioned if Ryder was hiding the whole truth. “Do me a favor...please tell my brother any discussion about my father’s death is off limits. I’ve answered all the questions and done the time. I can’t change that night and as much as I’d love to see my family back together, I’ve made peace with the fact it may never happen.”
His family could disown him a hundred times over and he’d never admit who really drove the truck that killed their father. He’d take that secret to the grave.
* * *
A few hours later, Ryder sat idling at the entrance to Harlan’s ranch. He’d borrowed Nate’s Jeep and picked up a bottle of wine on the way over, but he still hadn’t willed the nerve to make it to the front door. The chirp of a siren and the flashing lights in his rearview mirror just about gave him a heart attack until he saw his brother step out the driver’s side of the police SUV.
“I’m sorry.” Harlan laughed as Ryder jumped off the Jeep’s running board. “I wasn’t thinking when I did that. I bet sirens and lights are the last thing you need.” His brother pulled him into a hug. “It’s good to see you, man.”
“You have no idea.” Ryder clapped him on the back, relieved to finally see one of his brothers. “Thanks for visiting me when I was inside.”
Harlan nodded and held him at arm’s length, as if taking inventory of him. “I should have visited more often than I did.”
“Nah, you didn’t owe me anything.” Ryder jammed his hands in his pockets. The jeans still stiff from newness, he wondered what had happened to all his clothes and belongings that had been at his parents’ house. “How’d you know it was me, anyway?”
“Nate’s FRWILD2 plate. Tori has FRWILD1. I couldn’t imagine either of them sitting out here too chicken to drive up to the house.”
Ryder checked the back of the Jeep. “I hadn’t noticed that before. Clever abbreviation for the sanctuary. And for the record, I’m not chicken. Seeing you and Belle is one thing but facing your kid—my niece—after everything that’s happ
ened... I just didn’t know how to do it.”
“Fair enough. Let’s go do it together.” Harlan gave his brother another hug. “It sure is good to have you home.”
“It’s good to be here.” Ryder held on tight, fighting to forget the loneliness and despair that had been his constant companion for the last five and a half years. “I’m so sorry.”
He was sorry for lying to his brother when he had asked him if he’d really been the driver responsible for killing their father. He was sorry for not being able to stop the nightmare that had unfolded that night. And he was sorry his family went through such hell, publicly and privately as they’d had to clean up the mess while he’d been incarcerated.
“Hey,” Ryder soothed. “What’s going on? You doing okay?” His brother reached in the Jeep and shut it off. “Talk to me.”
Ryder struggled to tamp down the overwhelming fear that lived inside him. “I’m good. I’m... Wow. This is harder than I thought it would be.”
“What’s harder? Talking to me or being out?”
“Being out.” Ryder attempted a smile. “How crazy is that? There’s no one telling me when to get up or go to bed. I don’t have to watch my back constantly, yet I still catch myself doing it. A private shower and bathroom feel like a luxury, even in that old bunkhouse of Tori’s. Inside I didn’t have to deal with anything except survival. Now that I’m out, I’m seeing people in town I haven’t seen in years and I want to say, ‘hey let’s grab a beer and catch up,’ but they want nothing to do with me. Or I’m meeting new people that don’t know about my past, but I know they’ll find out about it soon enough.” An image of Chelsea the first day they’d met drifted into his thoughts. The warmth in her eyes, followed by the anger and disappointment he’d seen the next day when she’d learned the truth...or at least his version. “I didn’t have to deal with any of this when I was inside. I hate to say it, but in many ways, it was easier in there.”
“I can only imagine. It’s not uncommon though. I’ve arrested people with long histories who want to go back because they feel safer inside. I’m not saying you’re one of them, but I do understand. Anytime you want to talk, or not talk and just hang out, call me. It doesn’t matter what time. I’m here for you.”
“I may take you up on that.” His anxiety over tonight had begun to fade some and he felt ready to face whatever came next. “Now how about that dinner your beautiful bride promised me?”
“Knowing my wife, it’s quite a spread.” Harlan walked back to his SUV. “You’ll never know it’s vegan. And if she’s made her chocolate cake, man oh man, you’ll think you’ve died and gone to heaven.”
Ryder never thought he’d see the day Mr. Steak and Potatoes would salivate over vegan chocolate cake...or vegan anything. It proved how the love of a good woman could make anything possible. Again Chelsea came to mind. If only he had a chance of winning her heart the way Harlan had won Belle’s.
* * *
Chelsea and Peyton climbed the steps of Tori’s front porch shortly after eight on Friday night. Normally they’d be home and Peyton would be getting ready for bed, but a few of the partners in Chelsea’s law firm had made a sizable donation to the sanctuary after hearing about the mustang rescue this afternoon. Since Tori and Chelsea were friends, they’d asked her to deliver it personally. On any other day, she wouldn’t have minded. Today she did.
She hadn’t been in the office for five minutes this morning when a senior partner confronted her about Ryder. He had spotted the two of them together on his way to the courthouse and spent a good half hour warning her to stay away from him. By the end of the conversation, she couldn’t figure out if he was cautioning her out of the goodness of his heart or if her job would be in jeopardy if she continued her relationship with Ryder. They didn’t have a relationship, of course, but Chelsea didn’t appreciate her employer interfering in her personal life.
Tori rang the bell and was relieved when Nate answered the door. She figured the chances of Ryder being at the house were slim, but Nate’s presence erased those fears.
“Hi, Chelsea. I didn’t know you were stopping over.” Nate signed as he spoke. Stepping aside, he motioned for them to come in. “What brings you by?”
A man’s voice followed by Tori’s laughter in the other room stopped Chelsea mid step. Maybe Ryder was there. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“You’re not. We just returned from checking on the wild horses we brought in today. Tori’s in the kitchen with her brother. Would you like a cup of coffee?”
The tension eased from her body as she followed Nate through the house. “I’d love that.”
Nate turned and faced Peyton, walking backward as he signed. “How about a chocolate cupcake and some milk?”
Peyton’s face lit brighter than fireworks on the Fourth of July. “Yes, please.”
“You said the magic word. Chocolate. She’ll be your best friend for life.”
Tori rose from the table when they entered the kitchen. “Chelsea, this is a surprise. Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine. I’m here to drop off a check from my firm. They heard about today and they wanted to make a donation.” She removed the envelope from her bag and handed it to Tori. “And there’s one from me in there, too. Mine’s not much, but I wanted to help in whatever way I could.”
Tori tore it open and covered her mouth. “Oh my God.” Nate and her brother peered over her shoulder to read the amounts.
“Chelsea, this is extremely generous.” Nate wrapped an arm around his wife’s shoulders. “You have no idea how much this means to us.”
“I tried getting an emergency credit line increase this afternoon and the bank only gave me a fraction of what we needed. Nate had to put his trailer up for collateral just to cover the transportation costs. This more than makes up the difference.” Tori enveloped her in a hug. “Thank you. Thank you so much.”
“I’ll be sure to tell everyone. I wish I could do more.”
“You could always volunteer on the weekends,” Tori’s brother said.
“Where are my manners?” Tori stuffed the checks back in the envelope and pocketed it. “Chelsea, this is my brother Judd. Judd, this is Chelsea and her daughter, Peyton.”
“It’s nice to meet you both.” He shook their hands. “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that.”
“No, you’re right. I should volunteer on the weekends. I’m ashamed I haven’t offered before. I don’t have a lot of experience with horses, but if you need any clerical assistance in the adoption center or if there is anything both Peyton and I could do together, I’d be willing to help for a few hours a week.”
Just as long as it wasn’t in Ryder’s vicinity. She’d been on an emotional roller coaster ever since she saw him yesterday. Correction...ever since she made the mistake of touching him. The man had gone through hell and her only instinct had been to comfort him. She may be a compassionate woman—she had to be as a family law attorney—but she didn’t make a habit out of getting touchy-feely with people.
Nate sat a mug of coffee on the table for Chelsea along with a plate of cupcakes and two glasses of milk. “Missy is in her room. Would you run and get her?” he asked Peyton. She debated for a few seconds as if she wasn’t sure her friend was worth waiting an extra few minutes for her cupcake. Choosing friendship over chocolate, she disappeared down the hallway.
“Would you really be willing to volunteer?” Tori asked. “Even after the other day?”
“I’m still not a hundred percent convinced Ryder should be around my daughter.” Chelsea pulled out a chair and sat down. “But I appreciated him reaching out to me yesterday and explaining his situation. He doesn’t want to come between Peyton and Missy’s friendship or ours.”
“No, he doesn’t. I think once you get to know him, you’ll realize he’s not the man you think he is.”
Chelsea’s jaw tightened. That was part of the problem. She didn’t want to get to know Ryder. She didn’t want to repeat the same mistakes she’d made in the past. As much as she hated to say she had a type, she did. She’d always been drawn to her polar opposite. And Ryder came pretty damn close.
“How about we take the whole Ryder thing one day at a time?”
“I think I can handle that.” Tori pushed the plate of cupcakes toward her. “Now eat before the girls get in here and there’s nothing left.”
For the next few hours, the six of them sat around the kitchen table playing board games and polishing off whatever snacks Tori and Nate had in the house. It wasn’t exactly a wild night out on the town, but it felt good spending time with adults outside work. And Judd was a nice enough man. He was single, lived an hour away, had a decent job, and she was completely unattracted to him. The sentiment appeared to be mutual, allowing her to relax and enjoy the company of the opposite sex with zero pressure for it to be something more.
No one had mentioned Ryder’s name for the rest of the evening and a part of her couldn’t help wondering if he was sitting alone in the bunkhouse. She’d even considered asking Tori if she wanted to invite him, figuring she hadn’t included him because she and Peyton were there. But she hadn’t and by the time they left, guilt had bored a hole in her stomach. That was until she saw Ryder drive up to the stables in Nate’s Jeep. Here she’d felt guilty for hours and he’d had plans.
He waved but made no attempt to come to her. Instead, he stood by the door to the bunkhouse and watched.
Chelsea opened the rear passenger door for Peyton. “Wait here for Mommy. I’ll be right back,” she quickly signed before closing the door.