‘Still, you could have warned me, like yesterday, this morning even?’
She sighed. ‘I was tempted not to tell you at all.’
‘EJ...’
‘What?’ she blurted, a hand waving dismissively around her. ‘Honestly, Zara, when Shit-Bag did his thing, it was hell watching you suffer, but that? That was nothing compared to what you’re going through now.’
That was an understatement. But it didn’t mean she should risk more pain, more heartache.
‘He should’ve sent one of his assistants.’
‘Yes, well, I’m sure he would’ve done in any normal situation, but this at least gives him a chance at seeing you,’ she stated the obvious. ‘I mean, the man has spent the last three weeks trying to reach you, flowers every other day, phone calls, I bet he’s even been emailing, texting...’
EJ looked at her pointedly for confirmation and Zara gave a small nod. Not that his emails or texts ever gave much away. His apology dominating heavily and signing off with his desire to talk. The last one, arriving seven days ago, had simply said, You know where I am when you’re ready, and then he’d gone quiet. Save for the flowers. They still came and, although they saddened her, she couldn’t quite tell him to stop sending them. Even though she split them among her team, even though the happiness at seeing them was bittersweet, they were a reminder that he was still thinking of her, as she was him. And that, in some way, he suffered too.
Hell, maybe EJ was right: maybe she owed him a chance to talk, to explain.
And then what? You crumble at his protestations of ‘possible’ love and it all kicks off again, only to end up back here a few weeks down the line.
No, she just couldn’t do it. She’d gone three weeks without any contact, without even a glimpse of him in the paper—and, boy, had she looked. Anticipating him to go on the rebound, to hook up with the next exquisite model, actress, figurehead, you name it. Anyone to confirm her suspicions that he was still a billionaire playboy regardless of his actions towards her.
But nothing.
And she wondered, really wondered, had she been different for him too?
That small spark of hope lit anew and fear rose to swamp it, coffee sticking in her closed-up throat, and she forced it down. She needed to get out of there.
‘I’m going to take an early lunch.’ She rose out of her seat. ‘Can you message when he’s gone?’
EJ started, ‘Come on, Zara, just one conversation?’
‘Please, EJ—leave it alone.’
Her PA’s gaze wavered, and Zara wondered whether she would push again, but then she gave a resigned nod.
‘Okay, boss.’
* * *
Daniel had known she wouldn’t be there, had felt it in his bones, but it didn’t help the disappointment that slugged him when Elizabeth confirmed it. ‘She had to go out,’ she’d said, but he’d read the silent reason well enough.
She knew you were coming.
And he got it. He knew he’d screwed up. But it was driving him crazy. How could he prove he loved her if she wouldn’t let him anywhere near her?
He looked to the envelope weighing heavy in his hand—it was his last hope. It had to work. He flew to Sweden imminently and he had to make sure she had this before he left.
‘Can you give her this when she returns, please?’ he asked, passing it to Elizabeth.
‘Of course.’ She gave him a small smile that smacked of sympathy and he wondered at just how much she knew, just how much Zara had told her—did she know how Zara felt about him?
‘How is she?’ He asked the question before he thought better of it. Prying while standing in front of the entire office staff was not a great move, but he had to know.
‘She’s been better.’
He could sense the ears in the office pricking, the eyes being cast discreetly their way, and reined himself in. It wasn’t the time or the place. But Elizabeth had said enough—Zara wasn’t in a good place and, as much as it hurt that she wasn’t happy, it gave him hope.
It was that hope that had him drawing out his stride as he left, taking a phone call in the lobby that could have waited until he was in the car, praying she might return before he left and he’d finally get to speak to her.
But she didn’t.
And he left, hope still there, no matter how small.
He still wasn’t giving up.
Not yet.
* * *
Zara waited another twenty minutes after EJ’s ‘all clear’ message before risking her return, and by that point she was an emotional wreck. Just knowing he had been here, in her space, only moments before had her throat choking up. She could barely acknowledge EJ as she passed by her desk and headed into her office, knowing that words alone would break the seal.
‘Sorry, Zara,’ EJ said, coming into the office behind her, ‘but he left this for you.’
Zara turned to see an envelope in EJ’s outstretched hand. She swallowed hard, her hand reaching to take it, almost fearful. ‘What is it?’
‘No idea, he didn’t say.’
Her fingers shook as she lifted the letter opener off her desk and slit it open. She tapped out the contents and the air escaped her lungs in a rush—no way.
EJ bent forward and gave a low whistle. ‘Flight tickets?’
Fingers quaking ever more, she sifted through the papers: three tickets, to Nice.
Three? Nice? What’s he playing at?
And then she saw the dates—next week...the Monaco Grand Prix. She was transported back to their car journey, to the moment when she’d told him of her plans for her father and had accidentally led onto her history with Charles. He’d remembered it all. He’d listened and...
Oh, my God.
The ache inside swelled, the tears with it. Had she been wrong? Could he actually...?
‘There’s a note,’ EJ said, prodding a bit of paper out from underneath.
Zara lifted it up, the handwritten words blurring as the tears trickled over.
Please accept this gift for you and your parents. You deserve it. You will be met at the airport in Nice. Everything is taken care of.
I want you to have a good time.
I want you to be happy.
Daniel x
She stared at it dumbly, his words leaping off the page.
I want you to be happy.
‘You can’t tell me that man doesn’t have feelings for you.’
She felt her head shake, her heart fluttering like crazy in her chest. ‘I don’t believe it.’
‘Well, I do.’ EJ plucked the documents off the desk and thrust them into her hand. ‘And it’s time you believed it too.’
‘I need to speak to him.’
‘Finally, the voice of reason.’ EJ beamed. ‘I’m going before you change your mind.’
She watched EJ leave, the world spinning, her head turning dizzy as adrenaline flooded her system. She had to go to him. Now.
But she didn’t even know where to find him.
She didn’t want to ring him, she didn’t want this conversation over the phone, but it was better than the delay.
She raced to grab up her mobile, her trembling fingers taking far too long to dial his number, and her stomach sank as it went straight to voicemail.
She dialled his office number and his PA answered.
‘Hello, is Mr Lazenby available? It’s Zara—Ms Anders from Anders Estates.’ She felt her cheeks heat over her flustered request.
‘I’m afraid he is unavailable for the next few days, Ms Anders. Can I take a message?’
‘No... Not really... Do you know where I can find him?’
There was a pause; she was probably wondering why Zara sounded so desperate and unprofessional. ‘He’s taking some annual leave, but, if it’s urgent, I can get a message sent to him?’
/> ‘No—no, it’s fine. It can wait. Thank you.’
She cut the call. Annual leave? It didn’t sound like him, unless...
She dialled Julia and the woman answered in two rings—thank goodness.
She had her answer pretty swiftly. He was going to Sweden; he was going to meet his new nephew; he really was making amends. She pressed a hand to her mouth, a fresh wave of tears threatening as a multitude of emotions swamped her all at once.
‘Is there a problem with the house purchase?’ Julia asked. ‘If so, I’m sure we can get a message to him?’
‘No, no problem,’ Zara assured her. ‘Nothing that should interfere with his personal trip.’
‘Well, I believe he is due in Monaco at the end of the week. Why don’t you try him again then?’
Her heart soared.
Monaco. He would be there too?
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
‘THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE. This is unbelievable. This is unbelievable.’
The same words had left her parents’ lips a hundred times over. But it was. The whole thing. From the first-class flights to Nice and the helicopter ride to Monaco to the limousine service, all accompanied by champagne, all with no expense spared.
And here she now stood. Not in a hotel room, but in the master quarters of a yacht, the magnitude of which she could scarcely believe.
Her parents were up top with the captain, soaking up the qualifying sessions currently tearing along the track. The sound of the engines thrumming through the air, they were that close, the track residing just the other side of the dock. It was the perfect position, a dream come true for her father.
But her dream was still hanging in the balance. She’d been crushed when a chauffeur had greeted them at the airport. Even though Daniel had made clear she would be met, she’d still hoped that it would have been by him.
Should she have texted him? Told him that she wanted to talk? That she wanted him to be here too? Or had she guessed wrongly? Maybe him being in Monaco hadn’t meant what she thought? Maybe he had no intention of actually calling on her?
No. No. No.
She strode across the vast room, straight to the bedside table where her phone was charging, and grabbed it up. She couldn’t debate his intent any longer; she needed to know; she needed to speak to him; she needed him here.
She launched her contact list and a tap at the door stalled her. She looked to it, her belly starting to flutter.
Would it be? Could it be?
Trance-like, she headed towards it. Not daring to let her excitement swell.
It swung open before she reached it and she froze to the spot, her knees weakening beneath her. Shock, surprise, joy, all overwhelming as Daniel filled the doorway.
* * *
‘Zara.’
Daniel’s entire world stood still; the sound of the ocean, the crew, the engines, all falling away, drowned out by the wild rush of blood in his ears, his heart slamming in his chest. He devoured the sight, her colourful presence calling to him among the backdrop of clean white and stealing his breath away.
She stepped towards him, her lips parting, her eyes glistening in the sunlight. ‘You are here?’
His lips quirked at the wonder in her soft-spoken observation. ‘I would have met you at the airport but I didn’t trust myself to keep it all in check in front of your parents.’
She smiled then, a gentle curve of her lips that filled him with warmth. ‘Keep what in check?’
‘My love for you.’
The words were so hushed he wondered if she’d heard him but then she suddenly came alive, sweeping across the room, her arms encasing him.
Kristus, yes.
He buried his head in her hair, breathing in her familiar scent as his arms wrapped tight around her.
‘I’m so happy to see you,’ she whispered, her cheek pressed against his chest.
‘And I you.’ He kissed the top of her hair, reality starting to sink in and in the best way possible. Did this mean she was starting to believe...? That she could also feel the same...?
He unhooked his arm from around her and sought out her chin, coaxing her to look up at him, the emotion in her gaze momentarily winding him.
He’d swear it was love that he saw. Please let it be love.
‘I’m sorry I got things so wrong with us,’ he began, and her brow crinkled, her eyes wavering over his face. ‘What I mean is, I was a fool not to have seen it sooner... I love you, Zara. I loved you before I even realised what it was.’
Her smile bloomed, her welling gaze stripping him bare as the truth of his words sank in. ‘You really do.’
His fingers flexed around her chin. Was she making a statement or posing a question? He couldn’t tell. ‘Is it still so hard to believe that I can love you?’
She shook her head, the move infinitesimally small. ‘I’m just trying to convince myself this is really happening.’
‘Let me help you with that.’
He smoothed his palm along her jaw, his thumb brushing over her cheekbone and filling him with awe at the softness beneath—how he’d missed this.
‘I never want to be without you in my life,’ he said thickly, his eyes locked with hers, urging her to believe. ‘These past few weeks have been torture, not knowing how to get you back, how to make you see how I feel. This was my last hope. I figured if you realised how much I’d listened, how much I wanted you to be happy, you would see it for what it was—my love for you.’
She turned into his hand, her lashes lowering, a tear escaping over one lid as she pressed a kiss inside his hand. ‘I couldn’t believe it when I saw the tickets.’
Her eyes lifted to his on the last word, wet and blazing, and his heart exploded in his chest.
‘I wanted to come after you that very second,’ she continued. ‘When I realised you truly cared, that you’d listened and remembered something so small from our conversations so early on.’
‘It’s not small, not to you, not to your family.’
She smiled up at him. ‘No, it’s not, you’re right. But to you it would have been. And yet, you’d remembered and understood how much it means to us.’
‘Then why didn’t you hunt me down?’
‘I did,’ she admitted, her cheeks flushing slightly with her admission. ‘But when I discovered you’d gone to see your family, I knew I couldn’t intrude.’
‘Intrude?’ He tightened his arm around her. ‘If not for you I might never have gone in the first place. I might never have reconciled with them.’
‘Me?’
He smiled. ‘Don’t look so surprised.’
He brushed his thumb across her lower lip, the memory of which had haunted him the past three weeks, and his body stirred, the object of his fascination holding his eye. ‘You made me realise that if I could change then they could too. I was barely a man when I left them—a lot has happened since then. I only wished I could have taken you with me. I missed you so much. Seeing my nephew and the joy he’s brought to his parents, to see their happiness and wanting it for myself, for us...’ He shook his head. He was getting ahead of himself, but he couldn’t help it. The gates were open and there was no holding back. ‘I’m sorry, I just—’
‘Oh, Daniel.’ She bobbed up on tiptoes, her lips finding his in joy, a sudden kiss of happiness that was over before he’d had his fill. ‘I’m so hap—’
His hunger snapped, three weeks without her coming to the fore, and he groaned, crushing her against his chest, his lips silencing hers with such passion, such need. He was scared he’d hurt her but he couldn’t stop, and the way she clung to him, the way she moaned, he didn’t need to worry.
She curved into him, pressing up against his swelling hardness, granting him all that he needed physically. But there was something else he burned for more. He had to hear her say it.
He rip
ped his mouth away, his breathing ragged as he cupped her chin in both hands now. She opened her lust-filled eyes, wide and questioning. How did he ask? He’d never asked for those three words from anyone. He’d never needed to hear them before. But he needed them now more than life itself.
And then her expression eased, her head tilting to one side as she brought her own hands up to caress his jawline. ‘EJ was right.’
‘EJ?’
Who the hell is EJ?
‘Elizabeth, my PA, she said you had a puppy-dog-lost look about you.’ She smiled. ‘Of course, at the time, I saw you more as a lion.’
‘A lion?’ He chuckled, the sound strained in his pent-up throat.
Tell me you love me, that you can at least learn to love me...
‘An insatiable one at that.’
‘I don’t think I can ever get enough of you.’
She smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips.
‘You don’t have to,’ she said, dropping back. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’
Her assurance was enough. It would do for now. Be satisfied. He squeezed her to him, love swelling in his veins. ‘I love you, so very much.’
‘I love you too.’
He stilled. The words resonating through him, each and every syllable chiming with his heart, his head turning dizzy with it. ‘You do?’
She pushed back to stare up at him. ‘Christ, yes.’
And then she was kissing him, her hunger, her emotion filling him. Tears welled behind his lids, making further words impossible; he threw them all into his kiss and he knew she was doing the same. They were both duelling for what they wanted: each other. Life had never been more perfect, more complete. And for the very first time, he felt like he’d come home.
EPILOGUE
THREE MONTHS TOGETHER and it felt like for ever. In the best way possible.
It was her birthday and Daniel had insisted on a surprise. What kind of surprise she had no clue. But they were travelling north from London and she’d been blindfolded for the last twenty minutes.
‘You okay in there?’ he rumbled close to her ear, his fingers squeezing her leg over her jeans and making her smile.
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