by Brynne Asher
“How does that feel, motherfucker? Huh? It doesn’t feel so good, does it?” I ask as I bring a knee down hard to his back, roughly pulling his arms around as I reach for the cuffs in my vest.
“Ortiz,” I hear Mac warn me.
Not feeling like heeding any warning, I get him cuffed, stand up but bend over, grab him by his wrists and his silly-ass hair, yanking him to his feet, turn to slam him face first into the hood of the armored truck. And because I can’t help it, I pull him up a couple inches, slam him down again before I lean over and bite in his ear, “If you ever get near Gabrielle Carpino again, I will rip you a-fucking-part, piece by filthy piece, and kill you with my bare hands. Do you understand me, asshole? You had better heed my warning fuckwad, because I will make sure you will not enjoy it one bit,” I say throwing his words back at him.
I give him another slam into the hood of the truck as I feel strong hands on my biceps pulling me back and hear Mac say, “That’s it, Ortiz. We won’t be able to cover you for any more.”
I yank my arms away, take about ten long strides, stop, close my eyes and breathe deep trying to get hold of myself. I attempt to get all thoughts of Gabby at the hands of that asshole out of my head. Clearing my mind, thinking of Gabby in the shower with me this morning—healed, full of life—I open my eyes and turn to see they have Harper in a marked unit. They’ll transport him to the Omaha PD, process him, and get him ready to face charges. But this time, his charges will include assault and battery.
Getting my act together so we can get on with it, I’m anxious to get back to Gabby to give her the good news she can freely do her part to support the economy again. Feeling my lips barely tip up, I head back in the terminal to get shit done so I can go home.
Chapter Thirteen
Shoes
“I still can’t believe it.”
I mean, really. I’m in shock that Megan has been arrested and is awaiting bail for conspiracy to gun distribution as well as aiding and abetting a felon.
Trevor is being held without bail, an obvious flight risk. His case is going in front of a judge and he will be formally charged tomorrow. Busy from all the action this morning, Jude didn’t get to my house until well after seven-thirty. Tony had come over and no one had eaten yet so we headed to Granite City because they are brewing their seasonal Octoberfest Beer. Octoberfest is one of the best parts about fall. We just got our drinks and are sitting in a back booth in the bar area. Jude pushed me in first, following me in and proceeded to tuck me into his side with Tony sitting across from us.
“That bitch is out of her mind. She’s totally driven by money and greed, Gabby, you’re just too nice to see it in her. Her jackass of a husband dragged her into this, but she’s getting what she deserves by going along with it,” Tony lays it out.
Jude, who gives me a squeeze and I look up at him, agrees with Tony but does it more gently. “He’s right. I know you think she’s your friend, but you didn’t see her interrogated. That woman has the nerve of steel, but she finally broke and started spilling quick when she realized she needed to do what she can to save her own ass. She knew about the gun trafficking business and even where Harper stashed some of his cash. She’s not in as much heat as her husband, but she’s an accessory to many federal crimes. She needs to start being smart and cooperate or be prepared to do some time, losing her kids in the process.”
“But they got the kids back to their grandparents, right?” I ask, concerned about her little hoodlums.
“Yeah, they came immediately. The kids were only with Omaha PD for a bit, but once their drama queen mother was taken away, they started to settle down.” Jude shakes his head, preparing to take another drink of his beer.
The waiter came for our orders and I leaned back into Jude’s side, deciding I need to enjoy my Octoberfest and forget about Megan for tonight. Although, secretively, I can’t wait to call Lilly, Leigh, and Reagan to give them the scoop tomorrow. I also decide to focus on my life getting back to normal again.
The thought of this makes me smile, so I share with my dinner companions, “You know what this means, right? It means I’m a free woman. I can come and go, shop at will and catch up with my life. It might suck to be Megan but it’s a good day to be Gabby.”
Tony grins as I hear Jude chuckle, feeling him lean in to kiss the side of my head. “Yeah, Gabby. Looks like you’re free to do as you please.”
“Well, it’s just in time. I’ve got the Children’s Home charity gig I need to decorate for this weekend.”
It is at this moment about one thousand, seven hundred and forty-four things crash together in my head.
There’s no threat against me. Does that mean Jude will go back to his condo? He’s here with me now, but still, nothing is defined. He’s made it clear he’s interested in me and wants to see where this could lead, but what’s the next step? My life has been upside-down crazy and I’m not sure how Jude is going to fit into my normal everyday life when I’m not being beat up, threatened, or my house is being broken into. Will he want to back-off and slow down now that things are normal? What if he’s one of those guys that needs alone time and I’ve been a burden?
My face must look as upsetting as my thoughts because Jude gives me a little shake. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
I try to fake it. “Nothing, sorry, just started thinking about all I have to do for this event this weekend.” Not sure of how to explain myself, I start to babble on. “Lilly works in advertising, but volunteers to put together this fund raiser event every year and she roped me into decorating.”
“You sure you’re okay, Gabba?” Tony presses, knowing me well.
I pull my beer up to my mouth and mumble, “Fine, just behind on everything.”
I see Tony give a look to Jude and then back to me but keeps on, “I’m just glad I don’t have to dress up this year. Last year’s sucked. How Casino Night turned into formal attire, I have no idea. I’m all up for a Country and Western BBQ and since the practice buys the table, I can’t complain.”
Trying to concentrate on Tony and not Jude, I press, “Who are you bringing this year? And if you bring that bimbo Shayla again, I might throw up on your cowboy boots. Honestly, where you meet these women is beyond me.” I roll my eyes.
Tony has no desire to settle down, which drives my aunt and uncle crazy. He might bring a woman to social events, such as this charity gig, but never brings anyone to a family gathering.
“No, Gabby. Shayla was fun for a while, but I got tired of having to explain everything to her. Not the sharpest knife.” He winces. “I haven’t decided who to bring yet. I have a plethora of choices.”
“Gross,” I mutter.
Luckily, we were saved by our food as the waiter starts plopping down our dinners. “Here we go. Bruschetta Salad, Adult Bock Mac and Cheese, and a Bleu Peppercorn Burger. Let me know if you need anything.”
I look over and Jude is grinning at my salad, so I immediately go on the defense. “What? This salad isn’t about the salad, it’s about the bread. Look at this, six enormous slices of garlicy, buttery and cheesy crostini.”
As Jude takes a big bite of his burger he doesn’t say anything, just shakes his head. I dig into my bread and salad, listening to Jude and Tony talk football. I find myself start to worry about what’s going to happen now that Trevor Harper isn’t on the loose. During the past three and a half weeks, I’ve felt a lot of things, but not the loneliness that I’ve become used to. I like Jude being with me, in my house, and although I’ve hated being locked up, I love having him around. Now I wonder if I should have guarded myself more, not let myself become accustomed to him and enjoy the easy feeling he gives me.
As I’m thinking, letting the fear seep in and feeling like I might overflow with loneliness all over again, I hear, “Sugar.” I’m pulled from my thoughts as Jude looks down at me. “You haven’t eaten much, you sure you’re okay?”
“No, there’s just a lot to think about, with Megan and all. Stuff I’m behind on, y
ou know? I’m full, I ate most of the bread. I should be carbed up, I’m sure I’ll have to run two extra miles tomorrow.”
“I’m outta here.” Tony throws some bills on the table for his dinner. “I’ve got an early meeting—I need to hit it.”
“Bye, Tone. Thanks for coming over today,” I say, and Jude gives him a head lift.
“See ya both this weekend,” Tony says and I get stiff, wondering what my weekend will bring with Jude as Tony leaves.
“You ready?” Jude asks as he’s signing his credit card payment I didn’t even know he made.
“Yeah.” Jude gets up and takes my hand pulling me after him as we make our way to his truck.
Back at my house, I let Mia in, turn around and Jude is standing at the island finishing a work call that I can tell is about Trevor. “Sounds good, I’ll see you at the courthouse at nine. We’re meeting the US Attorney and Harper’s hearing is at ten. Gotcha, later.”
Setting his phone down on the island, he turns fully to me and crosses his arms across his chest. “All right, Gabby. What’s goin on?”
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t try and bullshit me. You turned funny at dinner, and I’m not talking about your cute funny.”
Trying to stall, I ask, “You think I’m cute?” I don’t need to ask this, I know he thinks I’m cute. He’s told me plenty of times over the last few weeks.
Now glaring, looking more than a little pissed, he gives me a warning. “Gabrielle.”
I take in a visible breath and let it out. Jude’s dark chocolate eyes are on me but they aren’t very melty at the moment. I haven’t known him long, but I do know that he’s losing his patience. I’ve got to let him off the hook. If he wants to be unleashed, he’ll take it or if I’m lucky he’ll want to stay, but it’s time I give him the option.
“It’s just that the last few weeks have been crazy. Trevor’s behind bars now and isn’t a threat anymore.” I look him in the eyes and keep on. “We haven’t defined what this is with us, so I don’t want you to feel obligated to be here all the time because we’ve become what we’ve become. I know you said you wanted to see how good this could be and I do, too. But you must have a life you want to get back to—friends, schedules. I won’t go psycho on you, you never made me any promises. I’ll understand,” I say, finishing so quietly I can barely hear it myself, but I can hear my heart beating out of my chest.
Finding this moment scarier than anything I’ve experienced in the last few weeks, all I can do is just stand here and watch him stare down at me. Another few beats go by and nothing. I’m not sure if it’s possible for me to lull Jude into a Gabby coma, so I’m not sure what’s happening.
Taking a chance, I call out quietly, “Jude?”
That’s when he moves. Dropping his arms, taking long strides toward me I barely get a foot backwards before he’s in front of me, his left hand grabbing my right one as he bends while giving my arm a tug. He puts a shoulder to my waist and I’m up, flung over his back in no time with his other arm tight around my thighs.
I let out a scream and yell, “Jude! Put me down!” Of course, he doesn’t put me down, but he does start moving to my bedroom. “Put me down, now!” I demand again.
“Shut it, Gabby,” he barks back at me, smacking my ass lightly at the same time, making me gasp. Making the turn to my room, he gives me a little bounce off his shoulder and I end up being tossed on my bed.
“What are you doing?” I yell, trying to find my equilibrium.
“What’s wrong with you?” he says almost through gritted teeth, fists to the bed leaning over me as I prop myself up on my elbows as best I can.
Finding myself pissed as well, I snap back. “Nothing is wrong with me, but I should ask what’s wrong with you!”
“What did you think, Gabby? What’s working in that fucked-up head of yours, huh? Did you think I was going to stay long enough for you to let me fuck you, take what I want, and leave you high and dry? Is that what you think of me?”
Doing my best to hold my own and not move an inch, I whisper, “I don’t know what to think of anything.”
“Well, I’ve lost my patience with this, but I’ll enlighten you again. Yeah, I might’ve been here to make sure you were safe, but I was here because I wanted to be. I’m fucking happy as hell things have gotten where they are between us, but I gotta tell you, I’m getting tired of explaining myself, so I’ll be as straight forward as I can and I’ll ask you to pay attention this time.”
I clamp my mouth shut and bite my lip as he keeps going.
“I’ve got a shit condo with my stuff in it, but even before I moved here, I haven’t had a home in a long fucking time. The last few weeks, I’ve felt settled in a way I can’t remember feeling. You’ve got a sweet house, Gabby, but I could care less about your house. It’s only has to do with you, coming here to you, eating a meal with you, going to bed with you, waking up with you, but really just fucking being with you. Now, I shouldn’t be so presumptuous to think that you are feeling the same way, but just letting you know, you’re giving off those same vibes. I have no desire to pack my shit up and get back to what I had before this, I don’t even want to remember what my life was like the day before I patted your sweet ass down,” he pauses to take in a breath. “So now you know. It’s your turn, Gabrielle. What the fuck do you want?”
I close my eyes and turn my head to the side. My heart is hammering away and I feel the tears threaten again. I hate them and everything they remind me of even though these are tears of relief. They start to seep through my eyes and fall over my cheeks as I open my eyes to look back to Jude. His eyes aren’t piercing anymore, they’re softer, moving over my face. I lift my arms putting one hand to his face and wrapping the other around his neck as I close the space between us and press my lips against his and leave them there.
“I’m sorry,” I murmur against his lips.
He grabs me at the back of my head and lower back, picks me up, and putting a knee to the bed, he turns to sit. I’m straddling him, sitting in his lap. He stuffs my face in his neck and pulls me as close as he can. My breath hitches and he starts to rub my back while putting his hand in my hair and for some reason this makes me cry even harder.
“I’m sorry,” I repeat through my sobs. “I just…I just didn’t know. I’m just sss-sso scared you might want to lll-leave. Damn it. I hh-hate crying.” Shaking my head and lifting up a bit to look at him, I go on. “You’ve been nothing but perfect with me, even when you’re bossy. The last few weeks have been so good—I’m just scared,” I ramble on. Through the still flowing tears, I let it all out. “I’ve been alone for so long, I’m afraid to hang on to anything. I was just trying to let you off the hook with me if you wanted it. It would be hard enough for you to leave now, but if I hold onto you and it gets even better, I don’t know what I’ll do if it’s ripped away. I’m so screwed up. I’m sorry,” I cry shoving my face back into his neck because now I can’t look at him out of embarrassment.
“Gabby, be quiet,” he whispers slash bosses in my ear and I press closer trying to pull in a deep breath to calm myself down. We sit here like this for what seems like a long time, him rubbing my back and me trying to take in air.
Finally, he gently pulls the back of my hair and I answer by lifting my head. We’re so close, all I can see are his eyes—melty and warm again. I can tell he has a small smile when he simply states, “You like it when I’m bossy.”
Closing my eyes again, I shake my head slowly. “Seriously? Is that all you got out of what I said to you?”
He gives me a squeeze, I open my eyes to look at him. “Yeah. And that you feel the same way I do, which I gotta say, I thought you did but it’s really fucking good to hear out loud.” He pulls me to him, kissing me soft and sweet. Letting me go, he sighs. “Let’s get ready for bed, Gabby. It’s been a long day, I’m drained.”
That sounds perfect to me. He helps me up and we both go through our getting ready for bed routine, mine taking
about five times longer than his. He lets Mia out one more time, closes down my house and sets the alarm. Such has become our going to bed routine.
I look at myself in the mirror thinking I can’t be happier about the man in my house, my bed and that we actually have a going to bed routine. He knows my fears but he wants to stay. He wants me. It’s time for me to relax and trust him. So, I make a choice. I’m going to hang on to Jude and let go of the loneliness.
I turn, head into my bedroom and come to a standstill in my nightie. I see Jude lying on his back, the covers up low to his waist, and his chest is bare. One hand is tucked behind his head and the other one is scratching Mia behind her ears since she is lying on his big, bare, muscular chest, her back legs stretched straight out behind her. Her head is leaning into his hand to deepen the scratch.
I look up to find Jude staring at me with a resigned look on his face. “She wouldn’t leave me alone.” He tries to rationalize his attention on Mia. “I pushed her off twice and she keeps climbing back on. Then she paws at my hand until I pet her. And if I don’t pet her, she gets up in my face to lick me. Offense seems to be my best defense with your dog.” He’s half-frustrated, half-amused.
Tilting my head to the side, I look at the beautiful sight in front of me. Sweet Tiny Little Mia sprawled out on Big Bad Hot Jude Ortiz and I can’t take it. “You like my dog.”
“You’re not gonna cry again are you? I mean, she really didn’t give me a choice here.”
“You like my dog,” I repeat. He just shakes his head but continues to scratch Mia. Then I go on to say with a slightly naughty grin, “Lucky Mia, she looks comfortable. I think I’m a little jealous, Jude Ortiz.”
Grinning back at me, he rasps, “Come to bed baby, I’ll make sure you get all the attention you need.”