by Elle Lincoln
I turn back to the box store, and my feet carry me at a sprint as I step through the broken glass doors. I rush to the garden department, tearing through their supplies, but all I need is a shovel. With a heavy heart I drag it back outside.
The forest is always near, and this place is no different. I walk to the edge of the lot and into the trees to find a space for seventy-one graves. There, I begin to dig.
∞∞∞
My hands burn and blisters bubble as I carry the very last of the dead to a grave. Night has fallen, casting my actions in long, drawn out shadows as the moon highlights my deeds. With each one, I demanded my memories to tell me their story, even the vampire I drained the life from. The irony was strong with that one. I discovered their names, what they used to do for a living, and what they did now.
They were all gathered to leave Asheville, heading out to find a better life. They didn’t approve of Balor, but it didn’t help me feel any better. Their sins were vast. Petty theft, as Balor stated, while some murdered others. Most only committed crimes after magic swept the globe as survival become an individual sport.
Yet none of that excuses my actions.
For hours I did nothing but think. In the end, the only one I fear is myself. Acceptance isn’t coming easily. In the past I’ve done some heinous shit. But always to those who held dirty secrets, and I manipulated them for my gain. That I accepted about myself. And yet, there is blood on my hands that I can’t wash off.
I do not feel sorry for myself. I don’t want their pity and I doubt they’d grant it anyway. But their love? I never, fucking never, want to feel like I did when they all walked away. Never again. I am better than that. I can be better for them and for me. But first I need to own my truth.
“I am a killer,” I say into the night air as I shovel dirt onto the man whose worst crime was admitting to cheating on his wife before the fall. She died with so many other humans.
My life has changed so much. I never imagined love would find me and when it did, I didn’t expect it. A good time, sure. But love? I wasn’t supposed to fall in love. But if I lost them like this man lost his wife, my world would end. I’d be no more.
They once told me never to lose my humanity, because it kept them grounded. Yet that is exactly what I did today. I lost everything about myself. Worse, I knew it. I could feel it.
I will remember this moment forever, and that was the whole fucking point. Balor knew if he babied me and told me all was alright, I may do it again. It was a hard lesson to swallow and I’m not sure I’m there yet, but I know I have centuries to get there. I just hope no more death follows in my wake.
Immortals play a different game. They are in it for the long haul. When infinity spreads out before you, mortal emotions fade. Yet those emotions make us relatable. Likeable. Loveable. Those emotions that will either make or break a kingdom.
Balor called me a demon tonight, something he hates. But demons can learn, they can love, even if they make hellish mistakes that no one can relate to.
I can now. I drop the shovel and head toward my demon. Because now I fucking get it.
Chapter 20
Logan
Questionable Intentions
I prowl along the edge of the forest. Watching her. Scenting her grief, her confusion, and worse, her love. She worries we’ve left her.
Never.
My wolf growls. He’s restless, our mind struggling not to go to her. To comfort her and assure her everything will be okay. Because it fucking isn’t okay. She lost herself.
We almost lost her.
She doesn’t realize that a corrupt mind can consume, destroy, and take over. Balor is our pillar of strength, and yet we each keep him in check. Now, it is she we must watch. Though I suspect we will all stand in her shoes eventually. All of us.
Magic holds no prisoners, and if we aren’t careful, we will all become her fucking toys. So, I sit, hiding in the shadows. She doesn’t feel me beyond her grief, which is better off. I don’t want her to know I’m here and defeat the purpose of this hellish lesson.
Demon. The word swirls in my mind. The human term tastes bitter on my tongue, and yet I know such a creature exists. Balor is impervious to time, his walls crumbling to allow us a glimpse inside of his head. Demons are those who dwell within the darkest recesses of this world. A mold of sin and greed. He is that creature.
I snort, glad he is on our fucking side. That eye... I shudder. Without that eye patch, it’s a reminder of his power he keeps in check. A lesson and reminder for us all. That without restraint we can succumb to the worst aspects of ourselves.
A whistle in the distance makes my ears twitch. My head turns then snaps back to Bette as she digs yet another hole. Alone. Again, the whistle sounds. Distracting me. My ears twitch once more.
It’s probably just Patrick bleeding for those damn creatures. That could have cleaned up this entire mess, but an unspoken vote dismissed that notion.
Except that fucking whistle sounds again. I growl low in my throat, may as well check it out. Bette still has a dozen bodies left.
I lower to the forest floor, my tail between my legs as I let the foliage cover me. The wind is nothing more than a slight breeze here and there, hardly making its way through the trees. I creep toward the whistling. I make no sound as I crawl over logs and rocks, darting beneath branches and bramble.
Until I catch it. The snarl leaves my mouth before I can swallow the noise. Fae.
“Good, you scent me,” her voice taunts.
I creep into the clearing where Kelsie sits on a log, munching on a beef stick. My stomach grumbles and twists, reminding me I haven’t eaten today. But I’ll be damned if I let her know that.
My hackles rise as I keep my distance, wondering what the fuck she is doing out here whistling.
“Don’t be like that. I’ve brought food and clothes.” She takes another bite. She looks... Normal. Dirty, but normal.
I sniff the air. My eyes drawing toward the bag of jerky.
“I’d like to have a chat.”
I growl at her, fucking Fae. I know how they manipulate. Taunt with the things you want until you cave. Well, I won’t be that fucking person. Still, I wonder if I can get the jerky and get away.
“I see you eyeing my jerky.” She kicks the bag closer. “It’s yours if you chat.”
What fresh hell is this? Confusion swarms me.
“Clothes.” She nods her head toward the folded jeans and shirt. Then the bitch opens another jerky stick, breaks off a piece, and throws it at me.
Fueled by hunger and what will obviously be a very bad decision, I eat the fucking thing as fast as possible then grab the jeans. I shift behind a tree, shoving one foot and then the other into the jeans.
“What the fuck are you doing, Logan?” I whisper to myself, before stepping around the tree to face Bette’s best friend.
“That’s better. Eat. I’m sure you don’t eat what the others do,” she taunts, because she knows damn well I need real fucking food and not the sins of others.
I snatch the jerky sticks up, sitting as far away as I can from Kelsie. Her motives still unknown.
“I’m supposed to be in hiding, but it seems if I want something done right, I have to do it myself.” She twirls a dirty finger around her grimy hair.
“What are you talking about?” She really has gone mental.
“How’s Landon?” Her smile is full of malicious intent, not at all like the woman I met before. A chill races up my spine.
“I wouldn’t know,” I grind out, not at all comfortable with this fucking conversation.
“That’s right,” she snaps. “Your alpha punished him. And you for that matter. All because he what? Fucked a Fae.” She mock shudders. “Wouldn’t want to be caught doing that, huh?”
My fists clench the jerky. “What do you want?” Why else would she lure me here with that fucking whistling?
“Insurance really.” Her smile is all teeth. “See, Mac made me a promise.”
I knew something was off with him. I keep my fucking mouth shut because if she got to Mac, then I’m in a lot of fucking danger.
“Tell me, do you want to know how your brother is?” she singsongs. Her madness creeping into every syllable.
But I do want to know how my brother is. I’m almost desperate for it. He’s more than just my brother, he’s my cub mate. We spent years apart and yet it was us against the world for so long until we found the pack. By the gleam in Kelsie’s eyes, she fucking knows this.
“Good. I have your attention.” She leans in, her scent drifting to me. The rot of her clothing almost masks the scent of Fae, but it’s still there, I smelled it earlier with a hint of something else. Insanity, most likely. “Do something for me and I will lead you to your brother.”
“I don’t trust you.” I break my vow of silence. My jaw clenches.
“You shouldn’t trust me.” There it is. I’ve met crazed Fae, but none have fallen this quickly before. Kelsie will need to be stopped, and I fear the only one who will be able to do it is Bette. And that is something I doubt she will be able to bring herself to do. I know if it were my brother, I wouldn’t be able to.
“What do you want me to do?” Regret laces my thoughts as the words spill from my mouth.
“I need you to make sure Mac keeps his word.” Her own words soften just a hair, and for one moment the old Kelsie slips through. The innocent, naive woman I first met. Then it’s gone, replaced by the mask of a crazed Fae. I can’t help but wonder how much of her actions are due to the need to survive. When people are backed into a corner, they are likely to make desperate decisions. Immortals are no different. In fact, they probably made that rule.
I lick my lips, the salty jerky exploding on my tongue. “That doesn’t tell me what you want me to do.”
She looks at me, her big blue eyes blinking slowly. My stomach churns with that damn jerky, sitting in there like a lead weight. “Do you want to see your brother?”
Warning bells begin to go off in my head. I want to see my brother, but something just isn’t right. My mind seeks out the closest guy. Patrick. I open to him completely, hoping he sees everything I do right now, that he hears everything. I watch Kelsie, unsure of her magic nor what she is truly capable of.
Her lips widen to a smile. “You’re suspicious.”
“Wouldn’t you be?” I counter right back.
“Yes. But you didn’t answer my question. Your brother, Landon. I know where he is.” She stands and I instantly take two steps back. I can feel Patrick now, miles away but watching silently.
“Of course, I want to see my brother.” No point in lying about that. It’s fucking evident.
“Good. That’s all you must do. See your brother.”
“Bring him to me.”
“I can’t do that, Logan. See, the deal is that you must ensure Mac keeps his word.” Her body is completely relaxed, but my senses are on high alert. She’s trying to trick me. Any second she will make a move.
And I don’t know if I will be ready for it. With all six of us, we are formidable, but alone? Against a woman born of both Fae courts? I can only hope the others find me in time.
She tsks, clucking her tongue. “Logan. I’m not about to trick you. I just want you to come with me to see your brother.”
“Why don’t we talk to Bette and Mac about what you want. You can bring my brother and we can all work together.”
Her face darkens, her brows lower, and her lips twist for just a moment. “I can’t do that.”
“What? Work with someone?” I hate that I’m curious about what her plans are.
“Bette wouldn’t like what I’ve done, yet I need her.” Her head snaps up, her movements jerky and unusual. “I’ve had enough chitchat. We need to go.”
I call on my wolf as my eyes see Patrick just beyond the tree line, silent as can be. I spring for the opposite side, but I don’t make it. Kelsie’s arm shoots out, holding me prisoner midair.
“I said we needed to go now, Logan.” She waves her other hand, spiraling as a horizontal cyclone forms. She pulls me closer to her. I’m unable to move or resist. My mind is trapped just like that fucking Fae collar once more. I’m held prisoner as she steps toward the cyclone. Yet she pauses, looking right at Patrick. “Tell Mac that I’ll return him once he upholds his end of the bargain.”
She steps into the cyclone, dragging me with her. I can feel her magic surround me, suffocating me from the inside out. I will never fucking forgive her for this. I don’t care who she is friends with. This is too far. Too fucking much.
The air leaves my lungs as I’m sucked through a tunnel as images distort all around me, until my body is spit out on the other side. I land on cold concrete with a crack. Nausea overpowers me and I throw up the fucking jerky.
“I hope you can forgive me, but I understand if you can’t.” Kelsie’s haunting voice burns me with anger.
“Fuck. You.” I tilt my head, watching as she locks me in a fucking prison cell.
“These are silver.” The lock clicks loudly in the dank room as her feet soundlessly tap away.
I kneel, knowing I can’t fucking touch those damn bars. I close my eyes, trying to link with the others, but though I can feel them they are so fucking far. Helplessness creeps into my thoughts.
“Logan?”
My head whips around, my eyes widen. I don’t fucking care if it isn’t manly enough, a sob breaks free of my lips. “Landon?”
He charges the bars as his skin sizzles. “Logan!”
“Landon, it’s silver.” He’s completely out of it. “That fucking bitch kept her word.”
He crashes to the floor. I crawl over to the bars, daring to get as close as I can. His body is filthy, and shredded jeans cover him and yet stay unbuttoned, riding low on his hips. I look him over, searching for any kind of brand. Relief hits me when I don’t find one. His eyes, brown like mine, focus on me as his mind returns to normal.
“Sorry about that. Kelsie brings out the worst in me.” He sits up against the wall and closes his eyes. “I’m guessing she bribed you as well.”
“I knew she was trying to trick me, but I wasn’t fast enough.” Again, helplessness settles into my bones. “How long have you been here? You look like hell.”
“Few days.” His answer makes me wonder just how long Kelsie has been scheming. “I smelled this intriguing scent and I had to know what it was.”
I groan. “Not her, man.” What is it with my brother and the Fae?
He snorts. “Tell me about it. She fucking knew too. Was nice until I told her I had a brother. Then the crazy came out.”
“She isn’t right, man.” Bette is going to be pissed. I moan, she’s really going to lose it and we just got her calmed down. “Bette is going to kill her.”
“That’s the girl, right?” He snaps his fingers. “The one Killian punished you off to.”
I smile. “You’ve made some shitty decisions in the past, but that one, that one I’m thankful for.”
His eyes pop open and a dimpled smile stretches his face. My rogue brother shining through. “Yeah. Yours?”
I nod, not quite ready to tell him mine and four others. “Now what?”
“We wait.”
“You know her plan?” I’m almost afraid of his answer.
“I have an idea. But you’re not going to like it.” His eyes close once more. “Brace yourself for this shit.”
Chapter 21
Bette
A Price to Pay
Grime covers my body, dirt embeds into my nails, and my feet hurt like hell. My hair has plastered itself to the sweat beading along my body. My clothing is torn in places, rendering it fucking useless. And honestly, it feels fucking amazing. I learned something digging all those graves. I can stop my body from healing. I can choose to feel pain, and I chose to let these wounds heal at a mortal pace. Why? Because it’s a reminder that I am alive, but I could fall prey to my own magic, losing everything in the blink
of an eye.
It’s been a sobering thought. One that I need to hold on to for just a little longer. I close my eyes, reaching out to the guys through our mental link. They were never fucking far.
Logan prowls a few miles away, Patrick a few miles beyond that, Balor sits high up on a roof directly ahead, while Mac and Casseus watch me from a balcony just under him. I turn to face them, their silhouettes dancing in the moonlight as they stand. I close my eyes, sending everything I’m feeling, everything I’ve thought through and more. I owe them so much, and while I felt Balor was moderately heavy-handed earlier, he wasn’t wrong.
I needed to do this on my own. Learn and grow. I just hope I can move forward. My priorities have changed. No longer do I want to destroy a species, I want to help them gain mental clarity. To evolve without the curse of immortal insanity.
My body bows with alarm, and my heart races in fear and panic. It’s not mine. My eyes widen and I turn on a heel. My chest heaving. Feet slap against the asphalt.
“Where? Where is he?” Everything in me struggles to keep control. Then I feel it. The thread thinning and thinning until one strong gust and it will fucking snap. “Logan.”
I fucking run.
Balor and the others don’t hold me back, instead I can feel their own worry and confusion as they race beside me, darting through the tree line and into the forest. Branches smack me as my panic grows, unable to dodge out of their way. He has to be okay.
Logan. I try through that thin thread. Logan.
Nothing. I’ve got nothing. I break through into a clearing where a lone log sits with jerky wrappers. “He was here. Where is he?”
I spin as a scuffle sounds behind me. Patrick’s blade rests against Mac’s throat, his face purple in anger. His hands shaking. And for the first time his pain is visible as tears gather in his eyes.
“I coulnae save ‘im.” His brogue is thick with emotion. “What she ‘ave ya do?” He steps closer into Mac. “What she offer ya?”
“Patrick.” But my eyes are now on Mac, his face twisted in disgust. I get the feeling it is only directed at himself. “Mac?”