by Tommy Baker
The edge in your life can materialize in countless ways but will include a common set of elements, which will help you to know when you’ve reached it. These elements include:
You feel a pull. Your edge feels like a magnetic pull—because it is. It’s calling on you to grow, to step into a more powerful version of who you are today. When your edge calls you, often you’ll find yourself moving toward it with little to no idea as to why.
You’re in a painful place. Your edge can come from a place of pain, and that’s a great thing. Hear me out: pain is a great motivator, designed to remind you what truly matters.
You can’t explain it. Your usual self loves to explain things and figure them out. This is how you stay stuck. In this case, though, logic wins but is also a feedback mechanism to let you know you’re getting closer to your edge. You can’t explain why, but it’s calling you and you must go.
It’s daunting and beautiful at once. While it’s daunting to step closer to your edge, every step builds you. It’s beautiful, riveting, and audacious. You feel alive. You feel courageous and bold and have a level of clarity you’ve never felt before.
If you had no fear, you’d sprint right to it. Your edge is going to come with fear. And that’s a great thing—otherwise, it wouldn’t be your edge. We must break the conditioned thinking of “If I feel fear, then it means I should back off.” No—not here. If you feel it, embrace it.
Arriving at your edge is one thing, but what you do afterward will determine everything. We’re not lacking for moments on the edge: what we’re lacking is the courage to step into them fully. To stop waiting, or delaying until the date on the calendar moves from 9 to 0 or from 0 to 1. Or until we get the next big promotion or life gets a little less hectic. All of these ploys are simply fear masquerading as logic, are simply attempts to make “sense” of something that transcends sense. The leap of your life will come from one place only, and it’s not your head.
The most important marker of your edge will be the rush you feel through your entire mind, body, and spirit—a combination of intense clarity and knee-buckling fear.
And if you’ve arrived at your edge by being brought to your knees, that’s a good thing.
If Your Edge Brings You to Your Knees, Great
Lisa Nichols felt broken. She desperately needed diapers for her newborn and needed them bad. Lisa was 25 years old with her baby’s father sitting in Los Angeles County jail—life was looking bleak. She walked to the ATM, punched in the numbers, and prayed. She was attempting to withdraw $20, but the screen glared back at her: insufficient funds.
Must be a mistake, she thought. She tried again, knowing there had to be something in there. And yet, the blue screen came back with the same message. The account balance was $11.42. Living on welfare, Lisa was already struggling.
But this broke her. She went home that night and instead of diapers, she wrapped her newborn in towels for two days. The shame and humiliation of standing in line at the welfare office didn’t hold a candle to the shame of failing as a mother, of not being able to look into her son’s eyes.
This was her edge, and it wasn’t pretty. That evening she made a vow as her son Jelani:1
“Don’t you worry, Jelani, Mommy will never, be this broke again.” As she said those words, she leaned into her edge. This was different, and she would never be the same after this moment. She explains:
“And that day, what shifted for me, was I was willing…and I don’t know if this is going to sound crazy…I was willing to completely die to any form of me that I had been so that I could birth the woman that I was becoming.”2
If your edge comes from pain, honor it. No, it’s not easy—but sometimes, pain is exactly what we need to grab our attention and give us the clarity required to chart a new path and take the leap. Sure, it’s messy, and intense—but what’s the alternative? If the pain leads to a radical shift and a decision born out of conviction, the on-your-knees moment becomes empowering.
This doesn’t mean we’re always looking for these moments to become catalysts for change. Psychologists have long researched what compels humans to change and why moments like Lisa’s lead to a lifelong transformation, and why others stay stuck. In most cases, change is inspired by something we don’t want. In others, change is inspired by what we do want.
Either way, what matters is that you get to the edge and lean in.
Leap Tip: Avoid the Middle
Bold decisions in life happen at the fringes. Either your circumstances are so dire you can’t help but change, or you’re being pulled so strongly by a vision of the future that you can’t not listen.
Where do dreams die? The middle.
Identify the one place in your life that must change and whether you’re going to leverage the pain of staying the same, a vision of the future, or both.
How You Get There Matters Less Than Getting There
Your leap is about a decision. This decision is rooted in conviction, where every part of your body is in alignment. How you get there is less important.
Would we rather get there in a state of bliss and inspiration while sipping on our favorite cocktail? Of course, but that’s not always the case. The reality is that our lives will have moments where we take leaps out of sheer pain, recognizing that we never want to experience the same circumstances again. But we’ll also have moments where we’re in a state of inspiration and are being pulled by a vision we can’t not bring to life.
Either way, what matters is the result: you were at a place where you chose yourself and committed to a new path. You stepped into the unknown—and reaped incredible rewards.
You’re Here for a Reason and It’s Time to Unleash It
There are no mistakes. You didn’t pick up this book for no reason. This life is everything, and you’d better hold onto it with everything you’ve got. Because putting the leap off for another day, another week, another month, or another year is too much. Every day that passes is a stark reminder of what you haven’t done, where you lose a fraction of belief. These fractions add up, until one day you’re living a life you can’t wait to run away from.
If you don’t take your leap, it’s only going to get worse. The voice during your quiet moments will get louder, even though you’ll be equipped to drown it out. With every minute that passes, there are missed opportunities for you to step into who you really are.
The stakes have never been higher. And I want you to embrace that, once and for all. This is no time for sugarcoating. It’s no time to put things off. You’re here, and that’s all that matters. That tells me something—the story of who you are and what you want, including:
You’re tired of the path you’ve been on. Belief in a better future drives our sense of fulfillment in this world. It compels us toward powerful decisions and lets us put our head on our pillow at night knowing we’re moving toward our dreams. One of the ways of measuring this belief is simply to look one, three, and five years down the path you’re currently on and ask the following questions:
When you imagine your future, are you excited and inspired?
Do you see a greater, bolder version of yourself coming to life?
Are hope, possibility, and growth on the horizon?
If the answer to any of these questions is no, that’s a great thing. It means you’re willing to get honest, which is the first step toward changing anything.
You’re tired of feeling stuck in the same place. We’ve all felt stuck. It’s debilitating, and it’s a tough pill to swallow. We’re pulled by something bigger yet stay in the same place. It impacts every part of our life. We want more, but we simply don’t know how to get it.
Is there a part of your life where you’re feeling stuck and in a rut?
You’re tired of thinking bold but not acting bold. Accessing information about business, success, personal development, and living your best life has never been easier. Yet many people seem to be able to regurgitate the principles but don’t have much to show for it.
You don’t want to simply know what it takes to be bold—you’re here to be bold.
Have you recently gotten excited about the possibility of change and yet woken up a few weeks or months later with nothing to show for it?
You’re tired of others around you telling you to “get real.” Not everyone is going to “get” your leap and your dreams. Sometimes those closest to you will try to bring you down to keep you safe. Many won’t agree about your path, but you must be willing to override their feedback and listen to your own. I’ll be giving you some tools that will show you how to use this as leverage instead of being held back.
Do you have a dream, a calling, a vision inside that you’ve been afraid to let out, or that others have told you isn’t worthy?
You’ve taken a leap in the past but are holding back. You remember taking big leaps in life—maybe you’ve already launched a business and taken big risks to reap powerful rewards. But now that seems like a distant memory, and you’ve been putting off another leap that’s been calling you.
Have you lost the boldness behind your original leap and lack the courage to step into your next one?
Something is missing, and you don’t know what it is. You feel it, you sense it—and it’s always in the back of your head. Something is missing, but you don’t know what to do with this feeling.
Do you get a sense you’re not where you should be—yet you don’t know how to connect the dots?
If any of those resonated with you, you’ve come to the right place.
Insight Is Overrated—You Already Know What to Do
You’re on your way to accomplishing the first part of any leap: getting honest about where you are today. Don’t underestimate the power of this. We’ve been conditioned to mask (and even blatantly lie about) our edge. We’re uncomfortable facing ourselves or even telling the grocery store clerk the truth when he or she asks about our day.
This lack of clarity robs us from the much-needed power to change our circumstances. You may be also be thinking you’re here to optimize your life and business and create exponential results. That, too, starts with getting honest. Because no matter how much growth you’ve experienced, there’s always another leap waiting for us around the corner. This is the beautiful game of life, the push and pull, the so-called dance between who we are today and who we’re becoming.
You already know what to do. This is why insights are cheap and a dime a dozen. But before we get you to a place of identifying the leap of your life, we’re going to have to get rid of what’s been in the way.
Because something has been holding you back, and the price is the heftiest you could ever pay: your dreams.
Chapter 1 Key Takeaways
Your leap is inside of you. There’s a bold step you’ve been waiting to take, and not taking it is keeping you from not only a deep level of fulfillment but results in your life.
The edge is where a decision happens. Whether it comes from a crumbling moment of pain or an inspiring moment of clarity, only one thing matters: you commit to change.
Honor the (real) reason why you’re here. We usually know what to do—yet we pile up reasons why it’s not the right time. Identify why you’re here and what specifically you’re looking for.
CHAPTER 1 LEAP POWER STEP
What is your edge? Identify the big, bold, audacious dream you’ve been keeping secret or a circumstance you know needs to change. Be specific and radically honest.
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Notes
1 Goalcast (2017). “Lisa Nichols—Rescue Yourself.” https://www.goalcast.com/2017/07/31/lisa-nichols-rescue-yourself. See also Resist Average Academy (n.d.). “The Keys to Abundance and Prosperity with Lisa Nichols.” Resist Average Academy, Ep. 98.
2 https://resistaverageacademy.com/98. Lisa Nichols, Inside Quest Interview. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VS5FqBZWpYo
CHAPTER 2
What’s Holding You Back?
You’ve been holding back. Something has been in the way, because deep down you know there’s a leap you haven’t taken. Regardless of how much you try to ignore it or drown it out, the feeling that something is missing persists.
They say ignorance is bliss, and sometimes you wish you didn’t feel this longing for something greater. Then, it would be easier to digest the moments in life passing you by. It may be easier to not feel the impending regret. It would be easier to avoid what’s happening under the hood, and how much more time has passed.
I’m going to challenge you to identify where you’ve been playing small. This part of your story can be used as leverage in pursuit of your dreams. There is nothing wrong with you. You are not broken or defined by your past, no matter how challenging it may have been.
You’ve simply been held back. These forces at play are influential and keep you at bay, including:
When you have a powerful insight, they talk you out of it.
When you’re ready to make a big decision, they play private investigator and find the faults.
When you’re ready to lean into the edge of discomfort, they pull the reins back in.
In this chapter, we’re going to explore the forces that have been holding you back. We’ll explore why these forces are present and the consequences of giving in to them. But we’ll also explore how you can use them as leverage. You’re going to discover how to reframe your relationship with them in a way that serves you, a way that uses them as tools instead of roadblocks, trusted allies, instead of enemies. Otherwise, they’ll continue to own you and keep your dreams locked in a safe labeled “someday.”
And the great tragedy is that someday may never arrive.
Fear Has Taken Control of Your Life
Fear. We know fear, because we experience it all the time. It’s the biggest and baddest of all the negative forces in your life. It’s always present underneath the surface and it’s relentless and intense. Fear will do anything to keep us at bay.
Fear wants us to be comfortable, play small, and not speak up. Fear loves when we put our dreams off and it talks us into waiting for tomorrow. What’s one more day? Yeah, tomorrow sounds better, plus it’s going to be sunny. Then, we’ll get started. Except tomorrow, fear is back and has a little more evidence to make you wait, and the cycle repeats itself.
Fear is responsible for most of what you haven’t done to this point, including:
Turning your powerful aha moment of clarity into nothing but another forgotten memory.
Robbing you of the emotional, purpose-driven vision you created—and ensuring it stays a fantasy.
Stopping you from striking up the conversation with a stranger, thereby dissolving the possibility of a once-in-a-lifetime connection.
Eradicating the clarity around your business launch, and instead telling you to spend more time in research.
Minimizing your recent win and success into a small feat and finding ways you could have done better.
All of these are damning, with endless consequences. We often forget the domino effect of fear: how a trivial decision not to do something could have led to the opening of a door we never imagined.
However, fear isn’t bad. It’s actually awesome. Hear me out, because fear is powerful and can be used as leverage. What’s bad, or rather, toxic, is our relationship to fear. Instead of using as the force that it is, we allow it to demolish our hope, keep us stuck, and preventing us from moving forward with our dreams.
Let’s examine the conventi
onal wisdom around fear, so you can use it as your compass and use it to supercharge your leap.
#NotesFromTheLeap
Preston Pugmire
Founder, Next Level Life, Speaker
What’s the boldest leap you’ve ever taken and why was this important to you?
I had listened to podcasts for years and always thought “I should do a podcast someday.” I leaned on the word someday hard because in the back of my mind there was always the fear of “what if no one listens?” Not only did I make the decision to put myself out there and announce that I was going to start a podcast, I told everyone I knew personally and through my social media network that I was going to debut at number 1 in the world in my category. It was uncharted emotional territory for me and it was very uncomfortable.
What did you feel as you made this leap, and what happened after?
There’s a scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade where Harrison Ford’s character stands at a huge ravine inside a cave that is blocking his path. His notebook of secret steps tells him to take a leap of faith. He decides that this means a literal leap, so he closes his eyes, holds his breath, puts his leg out and leans forward into the ravine. At the last moment his foot hits a rock bridge spanning the ravine that was camouflaged making it invisible from his vantage point. This is honestly what it felt like. I had to take a step into the unknown not knowing exactly what it would look like or how I would get across my “bridge” to accomplish my goal.
Looking back, what would you tell someone else in a similar circumstance knowing what you now know?