“I have attempted to reach for that knowledge many times. The answers are there, like a promise that exists within my mind, but there is nothing clear. As I said, only flashes remain.”
“I could try to help unlock some of those answers,” he said.
“There are no answers to be unlocked. It is merely a matter of time, not a matter of what I can or cannot remember.”
The Draasin Lord rested his head, watching him.
As he did, Tolan tried to reach through the connection between them. There was a sense of fire and spirit, a sense of something that existed between the two of them, but focusing on it didn’t give him any of the answers that he wanted. He strained, thinking that he might be able to uncover some answer from the Draasin Lord, but either the waste or the Draasin Lord himself made the connection difficult.
“I can connect to the lizard,” Tolan said.
“I doubt even spirit could help me.”
“Is it that you don’t want those memories?”
In suggesting it, he also suggested that the Draasin Lord was scared, something that he knew the Draasin Lord would resent, but he couldn’t help feeling as if there was something and some reason the Draasin Lord didn’t want him to try to reach for more understanding.
“Everything that happened was so long ago that it no longer matters.”
Tolan looked over at the nearest of the Guardians. Earth. It sat unmoving, though power did radiate from it. “My experience tells me that knowledge of the past matters very much. Everything that has come before can serve as a lesson, if we’re willing to keep our minds open and try to understand.” He took a step toward the Draasin Lord, resting his hand on the massive creature’s snout. His horned jaw was warm, though not as hot as Tolan remembered.
It surprised him.
The Draasin Lord was changing.
Not just changing, but fading. Eventually, when the Draasin Lord was gone, the possibility to regain the memories the Draasin Lord once had would be gone with him.
If he needed to find those memories, he was going to have to do it relatively soon.
The Draasin Lord might deny that he was fading, but Tolan could feel it. Each time that he was around the Draasin Lord, he recognized that he had less and less time remaining than he had believed before.
Eventually, the Draasin Lord would pass.
Then what?
Then any attempt to learn more from a creature like the Draasin Lord would be lost. The last of the draasin would be lost.
Tolan pushed across the connection between them. There was power between them. It was one of energy coming from fire and from the spirit bond. “I can help.”
“So much has been lost,” the Draasin Lord rumbled.
“So much has been, but much has been gained. Think about our experience and what we know.”
“We know what your kind has preserved.”
“Is that what bothers you?”
“It should be what bothers you as well.”
“Would the elementals want their memories to return?”
“Many are like me. They are content,” the Draasin Lord said.
“What would happen if you were to remember?”
“There would be pain.”
“Why?” Tolan asked.
“Because we would remember why we made the choices we did. We would remember why we chose to enter the bond. We would remember what it was like when your kind chose to bond with us, and when we chose to bond with you.”
“If that can be remembered, why fear it?”
The Draasin Lord regarded him a moment, breathing out with a heated breath. “Why have you feared the memories of your mother?”
Tolan understood. “I went looking for the answers about my mother. I went looking to try to understand my past. I knew it was going to be painful, but I also knew I couldn’t move on until I better understood that part of me.”
“You believe I should pursue that part of myself.”
“I believe all the elementals need to pursue it. If there’s something that you’re hiding from, or if there are memories you lost but still need, we should look for what we can uncover about them.”
“There may not be any way for us to uncover those secrets. Spirit may not be able to unlock these memories.”
“Maybe not,” Tolan said. “Then again, it might be able to show us something more.” It might help him know what Roland intended.
He had been here in the waste with orb bondars holding elementals.
It was tied to something he’d learned from Tolan.
What, though?
He reached out for the Draasin Lord, feeling the heat coming off him. He pushed fire out from him, drawing through his connection to Thoren to connect to the fire bond out here in the waste.
“You don’t need to push me toward the fire bond,” the Draasin Lord said.
“I feel like I need to do something for you.”
“You have done much for the elementals.”
Tolan sighed and looked around. “This Convergence is unlike any other that I have ever been around. There isn’t anything in the archives at the Academy, and even though I want to look for what exists within the library and the land Beyond, I don’t know the language well enough to be able to read what we found there. Even if I did, it’s far too extensive to be able to work through with any speed. And I’m convinced that this is the key to whatever Roland intends.”
“Is there another possibility?”
Tolan frowned. “What would you propose?”
“What other way would you have of accessing the knowledge of those who preceded you?”
“Other than the elementals?”
“As we’ve established, I doubt the elementals would be able to provide you what you seek to learn. Not because we would be unwilling to help, but simply because we don’t recall. Time is difficult.”
“I don’t know how else. Other than the records, the only things that we have are…”
Tolan frowned, an idea coming to him, but it was one that he thought was too impossible to even believe.
He thought about what he knew of the paintings within the hall of portraits and the power that existed there. He thought about what Master Minden had shared with him of those paintings, the way that they had been used.
Hadn’t it been through the portraits that I’d uncovered the lizard?
Master Minden had said the paintings were a way to understand the past.
Perhaps she meant that much differently.
“Do you have an answer?” the Draasin Lord asked.
“There are other ways of keeping knowledge,” he said carefully.
“Perhaps,” the Draasin Lord said. The massive creature began to get to his feet, and he spread his wings.
Tolan remained near the Draasin Lord. He could feel energy coming off him. Tolan couldn’t tell whether that the diminished power that he felt was simply a lack of drawing it out of the bond or if there was some other reason for it, a reason that left Tolan saddened.
“Come with me,” the Draasin Lord said.
Tolan climbed onto his back. There was something comforting about riding atop the Draasin Lord, feeling the heat wafting off him, gripping his massive spikes while he clutched his arms around the scaled draasin’s sides. He settled in, holding on to the draasin with a connection of wind and earth, anchoring himself to the draasin so that he could feel the power within him.
The Draasin Lord took flight. It happened more slowly than Tolan was accustomed to. He stretched out his massive wings, pounding at the air with a steady rhythm, and they took to the sky, making a circle as they gained altitude. Tolan held tightly to the Draasin Lord, feeling that energy burning through him, recognizing the Draasin Lord’s connection to fire, but also to spirit.
Was that more prominent now?
Since he had a bridge to that connection, Tolan couldn’t tell if there was some aspect that had been bonded more fully than it had been before. He hadn’t taken the time to try
to determine whether the Draasin Lord’s connection to spirit had changed anything in a way that mattered. Perhaps it would permit the Draasin Lord to be better connected to spirit, and perhaps it would allow the Draasin Lord the opportunity to last longer.
They circled above the waste. “What do you feel?” The Draasin Lord’s rumbling voice carried to Tolan, and as it did, Tolan didn’t have any answers. The only thing he had was more questions.
“I feel the emptiness of the waste.”
“What do you feel?”
Tolan closed his eyes. He breathed in, letting it out slowly. Heat pressed down upon him from the bright sunlight and radiated off the draasin. The wind whipped past him, carrying the strange acrid heat of the waste, an odor that he had come to know from his time traveling with the Draasin Lord, but also in his time flying over the waste itself. He detected the energy of earth, along with the pounding of the blood within his body and within the Draasin Lord.
All of the elements were here.
A signature, though one that was unlike any other place. Still, despite every claim he had ever made about the waste, there was energy here. It was energy that had existed, and it filled him with an understanding of it.
“You wanted me to be reminded that there is the power of the elements even out in the waste,” Tolan said.
“You didn’t need that reminder,” the Draasin Lord said.
Tolan grunted. “I’m not so sure. When it comes to what we’ve been doing, I’ve been singularly focused on trying to learn what Roland might be after, but I haven’t uncovered anything.”
“Why must he be after anything?”
“Because he’s planning for something,” Tolan said. “I don’t know what it is, but I know that it will harm Terndahl.”
“Have you seen any additional harm in Terndahl?”
Tolan frowned. “I suppose not.”
“Then perhaps he doesn’t intend to harm Terndahl.”
“He attacked the element bonds.”
“After.”
“After he attacked the Convergence, trying to target the waste.”
“Yes.”
“Are you saying they’re connected?”
“I believe hyza has shared with you the answer to that.”
Tolan grunted again. “Thoren believes the answer is within me. I’m not so sure that it is.”
“What is similar?” the Draasin Lord asked.
They reached the edge of the waste, heading over the free elemental village. In the distance, Tolan could just make out the outskirts of his father’s home. He should visit, if only to have more conversation with his father about the bondars, along with what Tolan remembered of his mother. It wasn’t much. He closed his eyes, focusing on spirit, and stretched that connection out from him. Now that they had passed beyond the edge of the waste, and now that they were this close to this free elemental village that had a Convergence within it, Tolan could tap into more strength and power. The village was constructed in such a way that it created a rune of power that allowed him to dip into that Convergence even from a distance.
His father was there. Not alone. Now that he had found someone else, he wasn’t going to be alone. Tolan should be relieved that his father wouldn’t be alone anymore. He deserved to have the comfort of companionship, the same as Tolan wanted the comfort of companionship.
Why should they have to suffer separately?
They had been tormented by Tolan’s mother long enough, and through all of that, they had never known the truth.
Until now.
Tolan now believed that he had some aspect of the truth. Whether it was real or only imagined was a different matter. It was possible that he still hadn’t tapped into the real truth of the matter, and possible that his mother had still hidden some aspects within him that he would be searching for long after all of this was resolved. At least he thought he understood, though. That seemed to matter the most.
“It’s always been about power,” Tolan said.
“Perhaps,” the Draasin Lord said.
“But he never brought the attack over to Terndahl before,” Tolan said slowly.
Why did that seem as if it mattered?
It troubled him. Roland had wanted power. It had been tied to bondars, capturing the energy of the Convergence, and perhaps even Chaos, but even when he had acquired that power, he had not brought it to bear against Terndahl. He had brought Tolan’s mother, but that was different.
She had a connection to Terndahl, and he believed that connection was the reason she had remained. There was something more that he had to find.
What was it within the land Beyond? That was the key, wasn’t it?
Convergences. The bondars. Elementals. Even the element bonds.
All of it was tied together.
The puzzle was there, and it seemed to Tolan that he just couldn’t fit the pieces together the way that he needed. It was almost as if he could find those answers, but when he strained for them, they didn’t come to him.
“He was holding onto elementals,” Tolan said.
The Draasin Lord turned, flying once again out over the waste, and Tolan clutched around the Draasin Lord’s neck, holding tightly. As they flew, he breathed in the energy of the waste, again aware of how distinct the signature here was. It was far more distinct than Tolan had ever credited it. Now that he recognized it, he also recognized the energy that was here, and he recognized how it flowed. The waste was separated from the element bonds. The Convergences directed power toward the bondar here at the heart of the waste. That bondar created the waste.
“How many Convergences are there?” Tolan asked.
“The Convergences are a way to reach for the power of the Great Mother,” the Draasin Lord said. “They connect places that are focused power.”
“I know that,” Tolan said gently, tapping the Draasin Lord on the back. They flew without the same speed that they once would have been able to. Perhaps the Draasin Lord took a more leisurely pace, but Tolan didn’t think that was the case. It seemed to him that the Draasin Lord simply could not fly as fast as he once did. If Tolan were to tap into the fire bond, reaching through his connection to hyza, he suspected he might be able to augment the speed with which they flew.
But would there be any point in doing that? Would it benefit the Draasin Lord in any way?
Tolan doubted that it would make any difference. The only thing it would do would be to point out to the Draasin Lord how he had been diminished. Tolan didn’t want to do that to the Draasin Lord. He didn’t want to remind his friend of his weakness.
“We’ve found Convergences all throughout Terndahl, but I haven’t looked beyond Terndahl. How many Convergences are there outside of Terndahl?”
The Draasin Lord flew for a while before answering. Tolan sensed a hint of frustration within him. “I don’t know.”
“You don’t know or you can’t feel them?”
“I don’t know.”
It was one more thing that his time in this world, time that had ravaged him, had taken from the Draasin Lord.
“When I was within the element bonds, he hadn’t paid any attention to them. I was aware that there were flickers of power, but not so aware of the key to it,” Tolan said.
“There is power within the convergences,” the Draasin Lord said. “It would connect each land to the bonds. To the Great Mother.”
Tolan understood that, but more than that, it seemed to him that the Convergences weren’t only within Terndahl. There should be Convergences within the land Beyond.
He needed to find them.
If he could, he might get closer to understanding what Roland was after.
They neared the edge of the waste and the edge of the land Beyond. The Draasin Lord landed and Tolan climbed off. He focused, closing his eyes, reaching for the connection to the element bonds. Out here, the only way he could do that was by tapping into the power he could reach through hyza, though he could also borrow from the Draasin Lord. As Tolan rest
ed his hand on the Draasin Lord’s side, he recognized energy within the Draasin Lord, but something more. A sense that told him the Draasin Lord struggled here. That he faded.
“We don’t have to stay,” Tolan said.
The Draasin Lord rumbled. “I can remain.”
Instead of borrowing from the Draasin Lord, Tolan focused only on Thoren. At least by going through hyza, he wouldn’t diminish the Draasin Lord. He wouldn’t run the risk of depleting his reserves of power.
As he touched upon the fire bond, he added a connection to the earth bond. Tolan pushed out, straining. He focused on the connection those bonds shared with the Convergences.
Knowing that they tapped into the Convergence, Tolan recognized them as beacons of power straining away from him. Surprisingly, all of it was across the waste.
He opened his eyes, looking at the Draasin Lord. “There are no Convergences here.”
The Draasin Lord rumbled. “There should be a connection to the Great Mother in all lands.”
Tolan shook his head. He continued probing, reaching through the Convergence, but even as he did, he found no sign of other Convergences here.
Maybe that was the reason this land felt so different. It had a different signature, one that was unique even compared to the waste. That mattered.
Tolan strained, searching for something that would provide him with an answer regarding the Convergence, but could not come up with it.
“There isn’t anything here,” he said.
The Draasin Lord rumbled again. “That is your answer, then.”
“The Convergences?”
“He wants power. You have said that.”
Could that be it? Could it be something as simple as Roland borrowing power, using the Convergence in order to reach it?
If that were the case, then what would happen if he were to succeed?
He would have access to a different power. The element bonds.
When he traveled to Terndahl, he had that same access, so it seemed as if that shouldn’t matter. Somehow, it did. Maybe he wanted to strengthen these lands, build them up so that the people here, if there were people—though Tolan had not seen anyone other than Roland—were able to turn their attention to Terndahl.
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