Jo held him in front of her. "It matters all. You matter most."
He shook his head. "I don't believe you. I can't."
"Why?"
When he looked at her with that anguished, celestial gaze, she saw every bit of his scarred soul. "Because you will have to abandon me, too. And I'm done with it. I'm tired of being left behind."
Jo pulled him into her arms and held him close. "Then I will stay with you."
"You can't do that. You have to return to your family, and your life."
She snorted. "My life is a disaster, Cadegan. The divorce bankrupted me. I'm losing my house. I had to beg a job off my cousins. Right now, the only thing in my life, other than my dogs, that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning is you. Well, not entirely. I'd actually prefer to stay naked in the bed with you forever, but you know what I mean."
"Nay, Josette, I don't. The last time a woman plied me with such sentiment, she carved out me heart and fed it to me until I choked on it."
"And my husband told me I was the only woman in the world he'd ever love or want. Then I find him in bed with not one, but two bimbos. Notice, I'm not holding his assholishness against you."
"We can't stay together, lass. You know that."
"I refuse to believe it. I was put here for a reason. Right?"
"Aye. To torment me more."
She popped him lightly on the stomach. "Stop that! I am not going to give up on you, Cadegan. Not without a fight."
His eyes darkened with agony, he shook his head. "I am Cadegan Maboddimun ... son of no one. Wanted by none. Conceived for evil intent. I entered this world alone and that is how I was destined to stay in it. I will not ask you to sacrifice yourself for me."
He broke her heart in so many ways. It didn't make sense. She didn't know him at all and yet he owned a part of her that no one had ever claimed.
All she wanted was to save him. To pull him to safety and keep him far away from all the ones who were out to cause him harm. It was so unfair that a man so decent was locked in here, while the world she knew was filled with utter assholes.
"That's the thing about love, Cade. You don't have to ask for anything."
He laughed bitterly at her words. "You don't love me, lass. You can't."
How she wished feelings were that easy to control. That she could magically take away hurt and grief, and tell her heart who she wanted it to beat for. And have it listen to her.
Unfortunately, the little bastard didn't work that way. It did what it wanted to, regardless of feelings and intent. Regardless of common sense and wishes.
She nuzzled his shoulder. "Then I'm falling head over heels for someone who looks an awful lot like you, buddy. Same eyes. Same lips. Same irritating tendency to look at me like I'm crazy. He even has a last name that sounds like he's lisping when he says it."
Cadegan laughed. "The things you come up with, lass. You are a real star-turn, aren't you?"
"Like a wombat in a cornfield."
He scowled at her. "Beg pardon?"
"You're not the only one who can throw together random words that make no sense and use them in a sentence like they do."
Cadegan laughed out loud at her silly nonsense. How could she make him laugh when he felt like utter shite? Make him want to be inside her when he should be running away as fast as his feet could carry him?
Unable to sort through the myriad of conflicting emotions she stirred inside him, he buried his hand in her dark tresses and fisted it. Then he did the one thing he wanted to do most.
He kissed her until his head spun with her sweet scent.
Jo was completely unprepared for the intensity of his kiss. For the hunger he made her feel. Wanting to show him just how much he meant to her, she pulled at his robe. "Take your clothes off, Cadegan. I want to feel your skin on mine."
She'd barely finished the sentence before they were both naked and he was inside her.
Sucking her breath in sharply, she groaned aloud as he held her while he thrust against her hips. "We really need to talk about foreplay, sweetie."
He paused to stare down at her. "You want more people for this?"
"No!" She laughed at his assumption. "Foreplay is the petting that leads up to this. Not that this isn't incredible, but a little pre-petting goes a long way."
"Sorry. I always thought women wanted it over with as quickly as possible."
"Why would you think that?"
"'Tis what they've always said to me. 'Hurry and be done with you.' Once they have their fancy, they're ready to leave."
She cupped his cheek in her hand and stared into his beautiful eyes that betrayed all the hurt that had been ruthlessly served to him. "There is nothing I treasure more than having you inside me, Cadegan. Take your time and let me love you until you're blind from it."
He thrust deep, burying himself to his hilt, and held her there, without moving.
Kissing his cheek, she cradled his head in her arms. His breathing ragged, he stared at her with his half-hooded eyes that seared her. He whispered something in medieval Welsh before he captured her lips and began to slowly, methodically make love to her. All the while, he stared at her as if she was the sole light in his darkness.
No one had ever looked at her like that before.
Jo struggled to breathe as he delivered fierce stroke after stroke to her. He held her effortlessly while he savored her body. She ran her hand over the muscles in his back and shoulders that bulged. Nothing had ever felt better than his hard body against and inside hers.
In that moment, she never wanted to go home. Never wanted to be without him.
Cadegan pressed his cheek to hers and inhaled the scent of her hair. If he could, he'd die right here and now in this one perfect instant of bliss. This instant where he was warm and happy. Where he felt loved and desired.
It's a lie.
It had to be. Yet it felt real. If she was lying to him, he hoped that he never found it out. He'd much rather live in this lie than deal with the reality that had been his life.
Crying out, she dug her nails into his back as she came for him. He quickened his strokes until he made her sing from the pleasure of her release.
And he waited until she was completely done before he joined her there.
Completely satiated, and feeling calmer than he could ever remember, he carried her to the bed and placed her in it. He slid in beside her and gathered her into his arms as a storm began striking against the castle windows.
She lifted her head. "That's normal rain, right? It's not like a swarm of angry piranha locusts or something, is it?"
He laughed at her panic. "It does storm here. And we do have the occasional swarm of angry locusts that devour the harvests. But that just sounds like a small autumn shower."
She let out a relieved breath. "Good. I'm not sure I could handle any more excitement today." She leaned over him and began to nibble the whiskers on his chin.
He arched a brow at her actions. "What are you doing?"
Wrinkling her nose, she gave him an evil smile. "You didn't think I was done with you, did you?"
"I did, indeed."
She shook her head. "Oh, sweetie, I've only begun. Before this night is over, you're going to be begging me for mercy."
He took her hand into his and led it to his cock that was already starting to swell again. "Methinks I'm up to that challenge, me lady. Let us see how well met you are to your word."
By the time dawn broke, Cadegan had to cede victory to his lady vixen. She did indeed wear him out and leave him begging for the mercy of a few hours of sleep.
But it was far from peaceful. His dreams tortured him with nightmares of his father's legions coming for her and ripping her out of his arms. Of having to watch her die before him.
When he awoke, he felt as though he hadn't slept at all.
"Cadegan?"
He scowled at the deep masculine voice in his ear. Opening his eyes, he found himself spread out over a man's body.
Furious and stunned, he pulled back, ready to battle. Then he froze in all-out shock.
That was his body he'd been lying upon.
And he was in Josette's.
9
Jo was terrified to be staring at her own body, from the outside of it. "Cade? Is that you? Please tell me that's you I'm looking at."
"Aye, lass ... that be you in me body?"
She nodded. "What's happened to us?"
Cadegan held his hands up to inspect them. Then, the moment he realized he had female breasts and that they were exposed, he snatched the sheet to cover himself.
She laughed at his actions. "Awkward doesn't quite cover this, does it?"
He shook his head.
"Oh, hello!" She jumped as a part of her anatomy hardened unexpectedly. Cringing, she bit her lip. "So that's what that feels like. It's not exactly comfortable, is it?"
"Nay, love, and especially not when 'tis obvious to others."
Likewise, he was grimacing, and crossing and uncrossing his arms.
"What?"
Making a very unattractive grimace, he squeezed his biceps over "his" breasts. "How can they be in the way and yet be so small and squishy?"
"Hey now! I could make that ... well, okay, you're seriously not small, but still! That's rude! And for the record, I am a solid B cup."
"B cup?"
"Means those," she pointed at his breasts, "are normal size. Average. They're not that small."
He grinned, only it wasn't nearly as charming on her face as it was on his. In fact, it was extremely creepy to look at yourself from another body.
How could Tabitha and Amanda cope with this as twins? She'd always thought it would be cool to have an identical twin.
It wasn't. She hated looking at herself. It was like a vicious, cruel mirror that pointed out every single flaw, from every single angle. "I am so going on a diet when I get back in my body. And you better watch what you eat, bucko, while you're in there. If I gain so much as one pound, I'll ... figure out some way to punish you for it."
She moved to scratch an itch on her thigh and cringed as she brushed her hand through the hair there, and especially the hair under his arms. "Oh my God, I need a bush hog, in the worst way! Some serious manscaping needs to be done to this body. How do you stand being so hairy? It's everywhere, except on your head where it's supposed to be." She started scratching all over, and in particular, her face and chest. "It's like having fleas."
"Don't you even take that tone to me. I promise you 'tis no comparison to the itchies I have in me nether regions. What is that and why?"
She paused in her scratching. "Oh yeah, I haven't had the money to get that waxed lately. You're right. It's itchy there too. We're even. Kind of." She dropped her hand to her lap and sucked her breath in sharply as she accidentally racked herself. Oh holy God and his saints!
In utter misery, she fell sideways in the bed and groaned in agony.
"Breathe, lass. It'll stop in a moment."
She couldn't speak as she writhed on the bed, cupping herself. When she finally recovered enough to draw breath again, she looked at him with tears in her eyes. "I'll never laugh again when a guy gets racked in a movie. Holy cow! I barely touched it! What happens when you actually get kicked there?"
"There's one lesson you don't want to learn. Ever."
"No kidding. Protect the jewels! I think my first call to action is a super-industrial cup. I see now why men liked codpieces."
Suddenly, the color washed from Cadegan's face. "I have no powers. Are they with me body?"
That couldn't be good. Her heart pounding, she met his panicked gaze. "I don't know. How do you use them?"
He shrugged. "'Tis the same as moving a limb. I think it and they do it."
She closed her eyes. "Now what?"
"Picture us clothed."
She did, and when she opened her eyes, she burst out laughing.
Cadegan not so much, as he stared at her in his body, wearing a lacy pink V-neck tee and jeans. "That is an abomination on me body. Could you please have a little respect for it and me dignity? I've so little enough that I can't spare to lose any more."
"Sorry." She changed her clothes to a white man's shirt, then grinned. "I have to say, though, that I look rather hot in chain mail. I like that look."
He snorted. "You say that, but your muscles are so weak, I can't lift me arms. How do you cope with no more strength than this, lass? Uh, this is hell!"
She daintily plucked at the mail sleeve on "his" arm. "Well, for one thing I don't walk around in a hundred pounds of armor every day. There's a good reason my boyfriend's so buff."
He paused at her words. "Boyfriend?"
Jo cringed at what she'd inadvertently said. "Sorry, I didn't mean to assume anything."
He smiled at her. "I like the sound of that. Except, I think I'm more of your girlfriend, right now. Duw! This is so disturbing, and in so many ways." Hissing, he placed his hand to his stomach. He grimaced and groaned.
"Oh yeah. PMS. Sucks, don't it?"
"'Tis like a wicked stitch from running."
"Yeah, one with steroids. Just breathe through it. It'll pass in a second." While he followed her advice, she put him into a shirt and jeans that were more suited to his tastes.
She reached out and touched his face that was her face. "You're right. This is so disturbing and yet..." She leaned in to kiss him. "Want to try something kinky?"
"I don't understand."
"I've always wanted to know what it was like to make love as a man. Haven't you ever wondered what sex feels like for a woman?"
"Nay, not really. I haven't had all that much of it as a man. And from what I have, they didn't seem to enjoy it near as much as I did."
There was a strange note in his tone. "What? Were you paying them for it, or something?"
He blushed.
"Oh my God, you were!" She shook her head. "Cade, there's a big difference between sleeping with a prostitute and a woman who's attracted to you."
"That I wouldn't know, lass. You're the only woman I've ever touched who wanted me to for any reason other than coin or shelter."
His words choked her. How could any woman not want this man? Heck, for that matter, if she was a prostitute, she'd pay him. She couldn't imagine a male this hot and gorgeous not fighting off every female who laid eyes on him.
"I will always want you, Cadegan, and never for any reason other than love. I don't care what you look like or where we are." She kissed him again and laid him back on the bed.
She tried to remove their clothes with her powers, but she still didn't have the hang of it. Rather, she resorted to peeling him out of his jeans and tee the old-fashioned way.
Cadegan shivered at the sensation of her scraping his body with her whiskers. "Remind me, I need to shave more carefully for you."
She looked up with an arched brow. "What?"
He fingered her lips. "I never realized how harsh me beard was on your skin, lass. It's like sandpaper."
"Yes, but I like the sensation." She dragged her chin over his breast and around the nipple.
Cadegan sucked his breath in sharply as chills exploded over his body. "Aye, I can see the appeal now."
She laughed. Until he reached down to cup her.
Jo couldn't breathe at the sensation of the exquisite pleasure that went through her as he gently squeezed her body and danced his fingers down the length of her. "Now I know what to do for you down there. Wow! I had no idea how good this feels for a guy."
He nodded. "Sadly, I've had a lot of practice working it on me own."
She gaped as she realized what he was telling her. "So you should have gone blind by now, huh?"
Laughing, he kissed her. "Well, there's not much else to do, truth be told. Only so many times you can throw the dice without losing all sanity, eh?"
She tsked at him. "You didn't tell me this little nugget when I asked what you did for fun."
"Not exactly something one admits the first time they meet a stranger. Hey man, what's your favorite pastime, alone? Tossing me oats in me sheets, of course.... Aye, nay, that confession doesn't appeal to me."
"Tossing me oats in me sheets," she repeated, then laughed. "I love the way you explain things."
"Like a wombat in a cornfield."
They were both laughing now.
Until she kissed him again.
Cadegan breathed her in and shuddered at the emotions she awoke. Happiness. Joy. Warmth. Protectiveness. For centuries, he'd lived in a numb cocoon. Feeling nothing. No laughter. Just survival.
But she was like sunshine to his darkness. Breath to his lungs.
And when she slid inside him, he cried out.
"Nice, huh?" she breathed in his ear.
Yes and no. Honestly, he wasn't quite sure what to make of it. "This is so peculiar, lass."
"Yeah, it's really weird, but not. Same, but different."
Yet it wasn't just the pleasure in his body that made this moment unique. It was the warmth in his heart that came from being held by someone who cared about him. Someone who didn't look at him with disdain or fear.
Or worse, bored indifference.
That was why he'd mostly avoided sex with women. With the exception of AEthla, he'd known they were watching the half-hourglass while he was there, just biding their time until it ran out or he finished with them.
And while AEthla had shared her body with him, he'd felt her reserve every time they were together. Her fear. Since he'd never slept with anyone other than prostitutes, he'd attributed it to her noble, innocent status.
Never to cold, blind hatred. Or to her ruthless ambition that drove her to use his desperate, bleeding heart to keep herself and her family safe, while wishing him dead and buried.
But this was so different. Josette gave herself to him openly. Without reservation.
With humor and love.
And best of all, Josette didn't just love him.
She actually liked him--it was unfathomable.
Most of all, it was exceedingly dangerous for all his kind. Throughout history, his species had been laid low by the gentle hand of a maid. He'd already come close to losing his life over one.
Now ...
He couldn't stop himself from wanting her. From needing to feel her touch his flesh. She will be the end of me.
But could there ever be a better way to go?
Jo closed her eyes as she buried her face against Cadegan's neck. This was the strangest moment in her entire life. No wonder men craved it. She was nestled in utter warmth. In tender softness. A blanket of limbs. But there was more to it than that. She felt so safe with him. Accepted. In all the world, even when her life was quickly diving into hell, she felt him pulling her out of it.
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