by Jackie May
I nod slowly. “It’s how I ended up with Charlie.” I wave in his direction. “I couldn’t stop myself from using my song on him. Once I had him enthralled, it was like I had to have him. I accidentally claimed him as a mate, but it felt like it was more than that. Like I wanted to…I don’t know, exactly…”
“Devour him?” Giselle guesses. “Consume him?”
I flinch at the startlingly accurate description. “Yeah.” My face heats with embarrassment, and I can’t bring myself to look at Charlie. “It was dark and tempting.”
Giselle lets out a long sigh. “I was hoping this wouldn’t happen. At least not for a few hundred years. I like you, Nora.”
That does not sound good.
“Why?” Terrance demands. “What’s going on?”
Giselle meets his eyes with an uncharacteristically grave expression. “It’s the curse.”
I exchange glances with my guys. They all look just as confused as me, except Illren. He looks suspicious. I’m not sure why. Could be just his go-to expression when he’s not looking bored.
“Curse?” Oliver asks.
Giselle nods. “All sirens eventually get overwhelmed by their curse and become dangerous. They lose control. The last one in the Great Lakes was killed after she started taking out entire ships, killing hundreds of human sailors at a time. That particular myth about sirens is true. Eventually, they all go crazy.”
“What kind of curse is it?” Terrance asks.
Illren steps up to the rail, gripping it tightly. “How do we break it?”
Giselle frowns at him. “You don’t.” She shifts her gaze to me. “Remember when I told you that the first sirens’ magic was born from a curse placed on them by the Summer King?”
“Yeah…?”
Illren goes rigid. His eyes fill with understanding. “Power born from any curse is always dark.”
Giselle nods and gives me a sympathetic smile. “Your power itself is the curse.”
“Dark magic,” Terrance growls.
Giselle nods again. Her demeanor is now sad, as if she’s genuinely sorry for my plight. Or maybe she feels like she’s already lost me as a friend. “And like with all dark magic, the more you use it, the more it takes over. I heard what happened in the club a few weeks ago. Using that much of your power likely awakened something in you.”
I can’t really process what she’s telling me. I’m a dark magic user? The only dark magic user I’ve ever known was Elijah—the psycho sorcerer who kidnapped a bunch of underworlders and stabbed me because he wanted my blood sacrifice. He was off the rails. Is that my future?
My stomach churns, and my breathing becomes erratic. Sensing my panic, Rook squeezes me in a tight hug. “Just because you have dark magic doesn’t mean you have to use it.”
Illren cuts Rook a sharp look. “It won’t be that easy. There’s a reason sirens throughout history have been hunted down and killed. They’re dangerous. Deadly.”
I can’t help but wonder if that was part of my appeal to Illren. Like calls to like…darkness calls to darkness.
Illren shakes his head, as if mentally chastising himself. “I should have put this together sooner.”
Giselle nods. “I hoped that being raised human would keep you wary of your power, and you’d stay your sweet self a long time,” she says sadly.
I don’t like the way she makes my fall sound inevitable. “So that’s it? I’m cursed to slowly slip into darkness?”
“What about us?” Rook asks. “Isn’t that the point of her having so many men? So she can control her power?”
“Oh, yes.” Giselle nods enthusiastically. “That’s a big part of it. The more content the siren, the less the curse can take hold.”
The I told you so look Illren shoots me is not surprising. “You’re not as content as you should be,” he says. And yes, he says it like an accusation.
I want to stick my tongue out at him, but he’s right. I’ve been holding myself back out of fear. I want the physical intimacy Illren keeps insisting I need. I do. I just don’t know how to get past my PTSD. Sometimes I feel like I’m making huge progress, and other times I think I’ll never be free of my fear.
A heavy silence stretches out between the entire group. We’re all thinking about the same thing. I know none of them blame me for my issues, but I still feel like it’s all somehow my fault. Logically, I know it isn’t. I’m a victim. I’m not to blame for what all those men did. But I can’t help feeling like I’m not strong enough to overcome the trauma. Heaviness settles in my chest, and I swallow back my emotions. “I’m trying,” I whisper.
“We know,” Oliver promises while Illren says, “Not hard enough.”
“Illren!” Terrance snaps.
Illren squares his shoulders and stares Terrance down with a look that would strike fear into the hearts of most people. “It’s true,” he says. “She’s not pushing herself like she could. All of you coddle her too much.”
“She was raped!” Oliver snaps. We all flinch at the crass term, but it’s the truth, and sometimes the truth is ugly. “Multiple times! And beaten within inches of her life!”
Oliver is shaking with rage. I can’t blame him. He’s the one who found me when I had only inches of life left. He saved me. And he killed two men to do it. He’s the one who scraped my broken body off the ground and carried me to help. For him, the nightmare is as real as it is for me.
“Nora has spent her entire life a victim of physical and sexual abuse. She’s never been able to trust men, until now. She deserves time to heal.”
I pull myself out of Rook’s arms and take Oliver’s hands. “Hey,” I whisper. I place my gloved hands on his rosy cheeks and force him to focus on me. “We’re okay. We’re safe, and together, and we’re happy. We’re healing together.”
Oliver blinks a couple of times and sucks in a deep breath. “Sorry. I know. You’re right. I just can’t stand him attacking you like that. He doesn’t respect you like he should. He doesn’t take your past seriously.”
I give him a soft smile and a peck on the lips. “He doesn’t know my past. And he may not be sensitive, but maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe I do need someone who won’t treat me with kid gloves. I’m not going to get over my fears if I’m not pushed. He’s right that I should be trying harder.”
Oliver shakes his head. “You should never be pushed. Not in this.”
Rook takes me from Oliver. “When we make love for the first time, it will be because you want to, not because you feel like you have to in order to fight your curse. Do you understand me? We will wait until you are ready.”
As much as I love him and Oliver for their patience and understanding, I can’t help feeling Illren may be right. “What if I am ready, and I’m just scared?”
Rook gazes deeply into my eyes, searching for the truth in my statement. I don’t know what he finds, but his face softens and he brushes my cheek with his thumb before pulling me against his chest. “If you really feel that way, then maybe we can push your boundaries a bit.”
“Yay! Sexytimes!” Giselle squeals, clapping her hands.
I crack a small smile at her antics, and a tiny laugh escapes me. Rook smiles when I do. “I’ll even take one for the team,” he says, “and volunteer to be your test dummy.”
I can’t stop the semi-hysterical laugh that escapes me. Rook grins and kisses me before letting me go. I blush when I find everyone watching me, several of them with eager expressions. Illren and Charlie both look just as willing to help me on this topic as Rook and Oliver. I don’t want to think about it anymore. “Okay, okay. Other than me having sex until my heart’s content, there has to be something else I can do. Some way to break the curse.”
Thankfully, everyone lets the subject change slide. “It’s not a breakable curse,” Illren says. “If you have dark magic in you, then you have it in you. The only thing you can do is not use it.”
I suck in a deep breath and strengthen my resolve. “Then I won’t use it.” I glare
at Illren’s skeptical look. “I didn’t know how important it was before. I can be stronger.”
“We’ll also research,” Oliver offers. “I don’t believe there are no options. If a light magic user can go dark, then a dark magic user must be able to embrace light. There has to be a way.”
Have I mentioned how much I love Oliver? “Thanks, Ollie.”
He grips my hand and squeezes it. “We’ll find a way.”
Charlie was right that the IHOP is open despite it being New Year’s Day. It’s not busy, though. We mostly have the place to ourselves, which is nice, but we’re wreaking havoc on our poor waitress. The human girl can’t be more than eighteen or twenty, and she gives off a shy vibe. We’ve reduced her to a shaking, stuttering mess simply by being us.
I can’t blame her for being flustered. Humans have an instinctive aversion to most underworlders. They subconsciously recognize us as predators, whether they realize it or not. With such a large group of us, the poor girl barely manages to take our orders. On top of that, Terrance is huge and grumpy, Illren is terrifying no matter what he does, and even Rook gives off this intimidating dangerous-alpha vibe. Then there’s Charming Charlie, too gorgeous for his own good, who keeps making her blush with his killer smile and flirty personality. Even I make her nervous. The only person she seems at all comfortable with is Oliver. Her lack of intimidation toward him is obvious, and it’s amusing the hell out of the other guys. It’s a welcomed distraction from the bad news Giselle delivered.
After bringing the last of our food to the table, the girl glances quickly around our group before settling her attention on Oliver. “Can I get you guys anything else?”
The guys all snicker. Oliver forces a polite smile at the girl and shakes his head. “I think we’re good now. Thanks.”
She blushes, tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, and gives him a shy smile. “Okay. If you’re sure. Just holler if you need me.”
As she walks away, the guys’ snickers become laughs. “I think she’s sweet on you, Oliver,” Rook teases.
“She is,” Charlie confirms. He would know.
Oliver blushes at this.
Their banter is nice, even if it’s at poor Ollie’s expense. It’s good to see the guys joking around with each other. Even Terrance gets in on the action, surprising us all when he says, “It’s because he’s so adorable.”
Oliver’s face turns cherry red, but he rolls his eyes at the group. “I’m never going to live that down, am I?”
“Nope,” Rook confirms.
“Never,” Charlie agrees.
Terrance smirks and shakes his head.
Illren is too busy pouring an unhealthy amount of sugar into his coffee to respond.
“Be nice, you guys,” I say, cutting into my raspberry and cream cheese crepes. “There’s nothing wrong with being cute.”
“Cute?” Rook parrots.
The guys all laugh again, and Oliver groans. “Not helping, Nora.”
I try to wince, but I’m sure everyone can see I’m close to laughing, too. “Sorry, Ollie.”
Oliver tries to glare at me, but he cracks a smile and laughs softly as he cuts into his ham and green pepper omelet. He gets a moment’s reprieve from the harassment while the guys all dig into their food. The way these men can attack a meal is always a bit awe-inspiring and slightly horrifying at the same time. After they’re all nice and settled in, Rook clears his mouth and says, “If Oliver’s the adorable one, that makes me the sexy one, right?”
I consider him for a moment and shake my head. “You’re more ruggedly good-looking.”
Rook grins. “I can live with that.”
“Then who’s the sexy one?” Oliver asks. “Parker?”
“No, Parker’s gorgeous, but sexy is different.”
My eyes flick to Illren before I can stop them, and everyone at the table notices. Rook drops his fork and gapes at me. “Kovros? You think the assassin is sexy?”
My face turns as red as Oliver’s was, and I focus on my plate, refusing to look Illren’s direction even though his smug stare is burning a hole in the side of my head. “What?” I shrug my shoulders. I’m busted. May as well own up to it and save some of my dignity. “Dangerous and mysterious is sexy. Haven’t you ever heard that chicks dig the bad boys?”
“Then what’s Terrance?” Rook asks. “He’s just as dangerous as Illren. Is he sexy, too?”
“Nah, Terrance is broody for sure, but he’s a big teddy bear on the inside.” I grin at T-man, and he cocks an eyebrow as if daring me to call him sexy. “I’d say you’re more handsome than anything.”
Terrance snorts and shakes his head as if he finds me—or this whole conversation—ridiculous. I flash him a wide smile, showing off all my teeth.
“What am I?” Charlie asks. “And please don’t say cute or adorable.”
I smirk at him over the rim of my coffee mug. “No, you’re pretty.”
“Pretty!” he cries, horrified.
“Yup,” I tell him, popping the P at the end of the word. “Very beautiful. Almost as pretty as Ren.”
The guys roar with laughter, startling everyone in the otherwise peaceful dining room. Even Illren chuckles. It may be the first time I’ve ever seen him laugh.
My phone rings, and the guys all quiet down so I can answer it, going back to their plates of food. I frown at the unknown number flashing across the screen and answer the call cautiously. “Hello?”
“Nora.”
My anger spikes with just that one word. “Henry.”
The men around me still, the jovial mood at the table vanishing in an instant. Every single one of my guys glares at my phone.
“Don’t hang up.”
“How’d you get my number?”
Henry doesn’t answer me. “We need to talk.”
I grind my teeth. “I have nothing to say to you. Don’t call me again.”
I’m about to end the call when he says the one thing in the world that would keep me on the line. “I’ll tell you the truth about your mother.”
My stomach flips, and my blood roars in my ears, pounding with each beat of my shocked heart. “What about my mother?”
“I have information about the rogues that killed her. Meet me at the main bar in the casino in twenty minutes. I only want to talk.”
I clench my phone so hard my hand hurts. I can barely think outside the memory of the night I lost my mother. “I’m not meeting with you in person. Tell me now.”
Of course the bastard doesn’t relent. “The casino. Twenty minutes.”
He hangs up before I can respond. The following silence is heavy.
“You’re going to meet him.” It’s not a question.
I meet Terrance’s stare. Most people would only see a pissed off glare, but he’s not angry, he’s concerned. “Yes,” I tell him.
“It could be a trap,” Rook murmurs.
It probably is a trap. But he’s dangled the right carrot. “I have to know.” I make eye contact with every man around the table, silently pleading for their understanding. “I’ve wondered my entire life. I’ve grown up terrified of the monsters that killed her, afraid they’d realize they left me alive and come after me to finish the job. Henry’s seen the rogues in my memories. He’s the most powerful vampire in this city, and he was long before the rogues killed my mom. If anyone knows something about them, it’s going to be him. If he’s willing to tell me…” I shrug helplessly.
A long silence stretches out between us until eventually Terrance flags down our server. “Check, please.”
. . . . .
The drive to the casino is short, but it feels like an eternity. By the time we reach the building, I’m bouncing with nervous energy. I have no idea what to expect. As we pile out of the cars in the parking structure, the guys immediately surround me. They’re all on high alert, which does nothing to ease my anxiety.
Illren and Rook lead the charge, with Terrance taking up the rear. Oliver stays close to my side, and Charl
ie is glued to my other side, looking near terrified. “Are we really meeting with the master vampire of Detroit?” he mutters.
“Unfortunately.” I give his hand a squeeze, and he laces our fingers together in a tight grip. “Henry and I have a…complicated relationship.”
“He’s obsessed with her,” Rook grumbles.
“Crazy obsessed,” Oliver adds with a grimace. “He’s kidnapped her more than once.”
Charlie’s eyes widen. “And you guys think it’s a good idea to meet him on his own turf?”
“Of course it’s not a good idea,” Terrance grumps.
Illren flicks a look over his shoulder. “We’ll be fine. It’s daytime. Henry will be severely weakened.”
I stumble to a stop just shy of the casino doors. “I hadn’t even thought of that. How is Henry awake right now?”
“The older the vampire, the longer they can fight the sun curse.”
I blink at him. “How old is he? Parker is over four hundred, and he can only manage a few minutes.”
Terrance opens the door to the casino and shuffles me through it. “Parker could probably manage an hour or two, if he really needed to, but Henry is much older than Parker.”
Much older than four hundred? That’s hard to wrap my head around. Of course, Illren is close to two thousand. I’ve never tried to process that number because it’s so ridiculous. It would be like someone on my income trying to understand exactly how much a billion dollars is. You just tell yourself it’s a lot and move on.
“Henry is also a master vampire,” Illren says, quickly surveying the entire room before allowing all of us to move past the doors. “He’s naturally stronger. But he’ll still be struggling, and he’ll most likely be alone. I’m not sure any of his other clan members would have the strength to stay awake for so long.”
I let out a long breath. Finally, some good news today.
Apparently Illren deems it safe to continue on, because he heads toward the bar. I cringe as we make our way through the casino. It’s not my favorite place in the world. Aside from being Henry’s stomping ground, the smell of stale cigarette smoke and the obnoxious noises of all the slot machines assault me from every direction. It’s not as busy as it was the last time I was here, but it’s still distracting thanks to all my newly heightened fey senses that I gained when my glamour was broken. And my senses are nothing compared to Rook’s. I’m not sure how he tolerates it.