by Jackie May
“Howdy, partner! Hope you’re not busy. Got a missing griffin I could use your help finding.”
I’m so angry I literally shake with it. “When someone intentionally sends your calls to voice mail, you should take the hint. Go away, Nick. I’m not helping you. Not now, not ever again. I want nothing to do with the FUA.”
I push past him to the door, but he grips my shoulder and turns me to face him. “Hey,” he says, his voice softening with concern. “What’s all this about?”
“I can’t talk to you right now.”
I jerk out of his grasp and reach for the door. He slides in front of it, blocking my way. I glance back at my clan, looking for help, but they all seem content to let me battle this one on my own. Terrance even looks like he’s on Nick’s side and would hold me down to make me work this out with Nick if he had to.
“Hang on, little spitfire. Talk to me. What have I done to piss you off so much?”
His genuine concern and even a hint of hurt make me feel guilty, which only makes me angrier. “You knew about my mother!” I snap. “About the rogues that killed her. You’ve known all along.”
Understanding hits Nick. He looks shocked for a brief second, and then his face goes blank. Even now, with me throwing it in his face, he doesn’t want to come clean. “Nora,” he starts, holding up his hands in a defensive gesture. His voice is cautious, as if he’s trying to calm a wild animal to keep them from bolting. “I wasn’t sure—”
Wasn’t sure? WASN’T SURE? “Spare me whatever bullshit is about to come out of your mouth, Nick! I know you knew. I asked you months ago about the rogues who killed my mom. I asked you to help me find them, and you said nothing! You pawned me off on Oliver and Ren, knowing they wouldn’t find the truth because you and Director West buried it.”
When Nick realizes I know what really happened, he sighs. His voice sounds tired when he says, “Nora, you didn’t want to know the truth.”
I grind my teeth and hiss, “No. You didn’t want me to know the truth. Because then I’d know that you were responsible for what happened, and I wouldn’t trust you.”
Nick frowns. “I’m not the one who gave those rogues free reign in this city. Henry—”
“Henry made a mistake!” I shout so loud they can probably hear me across the river in Canada. “Yeah, he let those rogues loose because he was trying to stop a war, but when he realized what kind of monsters they were, he came to you for help—you and Director West. Only you did nothing! You let those vampires continue to terrorize this city for months when you could have stopped them. But why do that, right? They were only killing humans, after all, wasn’t that right? And hey, if they killed enough of them, maybe the underworlders of this city would finally jump on board with the FUA.”
Nick looks away from me. He glances out at the River and rubs the back of his neck as if he feels guilty. Good. He should. “You don’t understand everything,” he says. “You don’t know what we were dealing with back then.”
“I know you let murderers roam the city, and that you did it for your own gain, not caring who was hurt in the process. I know that because you and Director West looked the other way, my mother and I were attacked. I was nearly killed, and my mother is dead. They didn’t just drain her, Nick. They raped her and broke her body into pieces. They tortured her for hours until they got bored of her screams, and then they drank her dry. That’s on you. You let it happen. You were happy about it. Even now, I bet you don’t care. I bet you have no remorse over how many people died because it got you what you wanted. Well, congratulations. I hope it was worth it. Forgive me if I don’t think it was. Take your case, and your Agency, and shove them up your ass. I’m out.”
I try to push him out of the way of the door, but he plants his feet, stubbornly refusing to move. “I get that you’re pissed, and you have a right to be, but you can’t just give up on the Agency. The fey have decided they’re going to join, but you know the stipulation. If you don’t, then they won’t. We need you.”
“Yeah? Well, I needed my mother. Now get the hell out of my way.”
“Nora—”
In a flash, my power rises to the surface. I don’t try to stop it. I’m too angry. I reach out and grab hold of Nick’s will. I push my siren power into my voice and growl, “I said move.”
Nick steps aside, and I shove past him, releasing him from my hold as I slam the door shut behind me. I shouldn’t have used my powers on him, I know that, but at the moment I can’t make myself regret it.
I stomp down the stairs, fighting back tears and praying Nick doesn’t follow me. I don’t know what I’ll do if he does. I’m a total mess right now. I’d storm off to my room for some alone time if Parker weren’t sleeping in my bed, so I head for the kitchen instead. I’m still full from brunch, but I could use some hot chocolate.
I grab a teakettle and set some water to boil, then hunt down the chocolate mix. The damn stuff is on the top shelf of the pantry. As I futilely stretch for the can, a warm body presses up against me. Angry or not, I close my eyes and melt into the man behind me, grateful for the comfort I thought I didn’t want. I assume it’s Rook. He’s the most touchy-feely. One hand grips my shoulder, and the other reaches around me to pluck the hot chocolate mix off the shelf for me. “Thanks,” I mumble.
“Of course, Mistress.”
That is not Rook. My anger fires up again. I spin around, pushing Illren away from me, and I glare at him like I could rip his head off with just a look. He barely backs up a step, refusing to give me any space, and he narrows his eyes. “You’re angry with me as well.”
I grind my teeth. “No shit! You’re as bad as Gorgeous—going around killing whoever you want and not caring.”
The other guys file into the kitchen at my shout, but I’m too angry to care about the audience. Illren frowns and folds his arms across his chest. “I don’t just kill freely, Nora. Henry came after you again. He needed to be stopped.”
“And if you’d cut his head off in that moment, I probably would have been grateful. But systematically killing off his vampires one by one in cold blood is way different. How am I supposed to live with that?”
Illren’s frown deepens. “Those deaths were the result of my actions and Henry’s. You didn’t kill them.”
“Didn’t I?” I pinch my eyes shut and pray for patience. “As Terrance loves to point out, I’m responsible for you, and you’ve spent the last couple weeks murdering people in my name. That’s on me, Illren. Eleven innocent vampires. Those deaths are on my conscience.”
The teakettle whistles, startling me. Terrance moves it from the heat and leans against the counter. Illren grips my arms to gain my attention again. “None of those vampires were innocent. All of them had blood on their hands. Henry’s vampires are not good people.”
I jerk out of his grasp and lean back against the counter. “You don’t know that. Parker is a great man, and he was Henry’s right hand for centuries.”
Illren scoffs. “Parker Reed has plenty of blood on his hands. The only reason he was able to defy his sire bond in your case was because he was under your spell. Good man or not, he followed Henry’s orders. As does anyone Henry has sired.”
“That’s why you went after only his sired vampires,” Rook murmurs. He, like all the others, has taken a seat and is listening intently. I think each of them wants the same answers I do.
Illren nods to Rook. “They are the most dangerous. And because of Henry’s obsession, they are a threat to us.” He gives me another sharp look. There’s wariness in his expression, but no remorse. “I am not a heartless monster. I do not mindlessly kill. I did what I did to protect you.”
I shake my head. “Those men did nothing wrong.”
Illren clenches his fist. “Henry threatened you. He told you you made an enemy of him and that you would regret using your power on him like you did. Henry Stadther does not make idle threats or empty promises. I kept an eye on the clan and did not make a move until Henry forced my
hand. The first two vamps I killed I did so because I caught them about to burn down Underworld on Henry’s orders to get back at you for the casino incident.”
I suck in a breath. I’m not the only one shocked. All of the guys go stiff, and Terrance lets out a very scary growl. His eyes turn black, so I move over beside him and slip my arm around his waist. Illren meets his angry stare with a steady look. “I sent their heads to him in a box.”
Terrance grinds his jaw and sucks in a sharp breath through his nose. He quickly regains control of his temper and nods to Illren. “I thank you.”
For a faerie to officially thank someone is a huge deal. It puts them in the person’s debt. In all the time I’ve known Terrance, those words have only left his lips once—the time I helped him find a missing troll. Everyone in the room recognizes the weight of the situation. Illren nods respectfully back and says, “You have welcomed me into your home and taken me into your clan. Please consider us even.”
Terrance nods again and the room falls silent, all of us lost in our own thoughts. Henry was going to burn down Underworld. Aside from our clan, that’s Terrance’s entire life—his pride and joy. “I can’t believe he would hurt Terrance like that just to get back at me.”
“He knows you, Nora,” Oliver murmurs. “He knows how much you care about us. He knows the best way to hurt you would be to hurt us.”
Bile climbs up my throat. “That’s despicable.”
Illren sighs. “He’s a thug, Nora. A gangster. He rules this city through blood and fear. There is only one language a man like him speaks: violence. I couldn’t let him get away with his actions. I had to show him our strength. Sending him the two men who acted out against us wasn’t enough. Henry needed to see that he is not the only dangerous man in this town that does not make idle threats. If he does not fear us, he will never stop.”
I swallow hard. As much as I don’t want to condone Illren’s killing spree, he makes a solid point. Henry wouldn’t stop if he didn’t have to. And there’s no question in my mind that Henry was rocked hard by Illren’s retaliation. He was a wreck. He promised a ceasefire, and I believed him.
“Okay.” My body sags in defeat, and I meet Illren’s piercing stare. “Okay, I understand.”
Illren steps close again and lifts my chin. “I am sorry that I upset you, but I promise you, I only did what I must to protect you and this clan.”
He’s so close I can no longer think. His presence is overpowering, and his scent is making my head spin. My heart speeds up, and I start to tremble. “Do not be angry with me anymore, Mistress,” he whispers.
My eyes follow his words as they fall from his lips. I know I’m staring at his mouth, and I know what kind of a signal that is, but I can’t tear my eyes away.
Illren sees my gaze drop and decides to act on it. He leans down slowly. I tell myself I should push him away, but my body betrays me. When his mouth covers mine, I lift up onto my toes and lean into the kiss. He pulls me flush against him and pushes his tongue into my mouth. The kiss is rough and commanding. Domineering, just like him. It’s a shock, but it lights me on fire, and I find myself submitting. I’m at his mercy for as long as he feels like holding the kiss. Which he does, until someone clears their throat.
The moment is broken, leaving me feeling lightheaded. I can’t move. My entire body is Jell-O. Illren keeps me plastered against him as I catch my breath, and he smirks at me, loving how much his kiss affected me. Smug bastard. I glare at him—which does absolutely nothing to lessen his arrogance—then tear myself out of his arms and scowl at Charlie. He lifts his eyebrows in surprise. “What’d I do?”
I’m not buying his innocent act. “Why is it that every time I’m in a room with you, someone kisses me?”
Charlie, mischievous faerie that he is, grins. “You’re just lucky, I guess.”
I clench my hands out in front of me, miming wringing his neck.
Charlie steps toward me and takes my hands in his. His smile softens into something a lot more sincere. “Don’t fight it, love. You need your men. Let them take care of you. Let them make you happy.
Charlie’s thoughts are focused on my feelings. So much turmoil. Why is she so scared of intimacy? Why doesn’t she embrace what her men are so desperate to give her? Their love for her is stronger than anything I’ve ever felt. How can I make her see it?
It’s hard to stay mad when his thoughts are so sincere, and I can feel his distress through our mate bond. But I’m still so overwhelmed with everything that I just need room to breathe. I suck in a deep breath through my nose, give his hands a squeeze, and try to manage a smile as I pull out of his grip. “They do make me happy,” I promise. I catch everyone’s gazes one after the other, making sure they all know how much I mean it. Forcing another smile, I back up from the group. “If you all don’t mind, I just need a little space right now.”
None of them stop me when I walk away. Parker’s still sleeping in my room, so I bypass it and head for Oliver’s. I close the door quietly behind me and make straight for his messy bed. The sloppy covers make me smile. I’d always pegged Oliver for a neat freak, and in ways he is organized to a fault. But he never makes his bed. I asked him about it once, and he just shrugged and said, “What’s the point? No one’s going to see it, and I’m just going to mess it up again.”
I climb onto the bed, bury myself in the covers, and hug his pillows. They smell like him, and it’s just what I need right now. I close my eyes and let myself miss my mother. Learning that her death could have been prevented hurts, but there’s still closure in knowing what happened, and I’m grateful to Henry for telling me the truth. But it’s brought back memories I’d long since buried, and for now, I just need to grieve.
Twenty minutes pass before Oliver finds me quietly crying in his bed. He doesn’t question me, simply crawls into the bed with me and curls up against my back. I press my eyes closed, and a few tears escape when he wraps himself around me in a hug. He says nothing, just holds me tight and runs his fingers through my hair. He knows me well enough to know that I need both comfort and space.
When I have control of my tears, I sniffle and break the silence. “Sorry.” I wipe at my salt-crusted cheeks. “Parker was asleep in my room. I didn’t want to wake him.”
Oliver kisses my head and squeezes me even tighter. “You know you’re always welcome in my bed.”
I snort because he said it kindly enough that it could easily be taken as sincere instead of the innuendo that it was. Not many realize it, but Oliver isn’t as innocent as he would have people believe.
At my laugh, Oliver leans up on his elbow and urges me to face him. I roll toward him, and he thumbs the last of my tears away. My eyes flutter shut, encouraging Oliver to touch me more. He trails his fingertips along my arms so lightly that a violent shiver rocks me. When he reaches my wrist, he takes my hand, lacing our fingers together, and kisses the corner of my mouth. I’m now a melted puddle of need, but Oliver’s thoughts aren’t nearly as heated as mine. “Will you come with me somewhere?” he asks.
I catch an image of Wulf’s place in his mind. His thoughts are specifically on the pool in his gym. I’m so surprised that I sit up. “You want to take me swimming?”
Oliver sighs playfully. “No surprising a mind reader.”
I crack a smile. “Not when you can’t keep your hands to yourself.”
Oliver chuckles. “Worth it.” He kisses the back of my hand before sitting up. “So do you want to go? Get out of here for a while, just you and me?”
That sounds like heaven, but there’s a problem. “I don’t own a swimsuit.”
Oliver gives me a sheepish shrug. His cheeks frost with the lightest layer of pink. “I sort of already bought you one. I’ve just been waiting for the right time to give it to you.”
My eyebrows fly up, though I shouldn’t be so surprised. Oliver is a swimmer. It’s his thing. Of course he’d want to share that with me. “I also don’t know how to swim,” I point out.
&n
bsp; “I can fix that.” He pulls me off the bed and grabs a gym bag from his closet. “Come on. You’re a siren. A water faerie. You’ll probably be more at home in the pool than you’ve ever been on land.”
“I’m not arguing with you.” I flash him a wicked grin. “I’m just wondering if you swim in a Speedo.”
The pink returns to Ollie’s cheeks, but he chuckles again and shakes his head. “Not since my high school swim team.”
“Bummer.”
Oliver meets my gaze with surprising confidence. “I don’t think you’ll be disappointed even if I’m wearing my board shorts.”
Damn. My adorable one just went and got sexy on me.
Oliver’s lips quirk up into the tiniest, cocky smile, and he nods his head toward the bedroom door. “Come on.”
. . . . .
I stand in the bathroom at Wulf’s place, scared to join Oliver in the pool. I’m not sure why I’m so nervous. It could just be the amount of skin I’m showing. I trust Oliver, but I’ve never been this undressed in front of someone before.
I look pretty good, though. Oliver has great taste. I’m wearing a jade boy shorts and halter-top bikini. It’s both cute and sexy. And my body has some definition for the first time in my life. It’s not hard enough to cut glass on or anything, but there’s some outline to my muscles thanks to all of Rook’s training.
I take a deep breath and try to suppress the butterflies in my stomach when I exit the bathroom and join Oliver by the water. The pool itself isn’t huge. It’s a simple and functional rectangle with a few lap lanes on one side and a deep end with a diving board.
Oliver is already in the water, standing waist deep near the edge of the pool. My mouth dries up, and those butterflies I was trying to suppress? Yeah, they busted the hell out and are going wild in my stomach. Oliver may be a little on the pale side, but his body is perfection. He’s tall and lean, and unlike me, his muscles are hard enough to cut glass on. I want to touch him very, very badly. I want to trace every groove. Possibly with my tongue. My body warms at the idea of tasting him.