Chapter 18
The sand was hot beneath my feet, the warm tide lapping with soft caresses over my toes. I frowned, unsettled by my unfamiliar surroundings. I began to look about and then leapt back in surprise as three large pigs ran past me, squealing and grunting, clearly terrified as they thundered past. I turned to watch them as they disappeared into the undergrowth beside the beach and started in surprise as I found a man in front of me. He was big and swarthy and ... I was angry with him - I had no idea why. He took a step forward, and I threw out my hand. A moment later and I was looking at a large grey wolf. The creature panicked, frantic on four legs, terror in his eyes, and I laughed and laughed ...
With a gasp of horror I found myself sitting on a rock. I breathed carefully, trying to calm my thundering heart. What the hell had that been about?
I turned as I realised there was the roaring sound of water and found there was a waterfall at my back. The river tumbled over massive, smooth stones and down into the river that snaked through the trees, swirling in busy little eddies at the base of the rock I was sitting on. It was a beautiful place, in the heart of the woodland and all around branches overhung the river. It was deliciously green, late spring, and the leaves were vibrant, lush and freshly minted. I remembered it as a sacred place, and I could see in the shallows the glint of jewellery and offerings to the gods. Movement in the trees to my right had me turning back and I caught my breath as I saw him striding towards me. Corvus.
My heart seemed to leap in my chest and I ran to him. He laughed, catching me in his arms and pulling me to him.
“Did you miss me?” he said with a grin and suddenly I was laughing too, except there was hysteria in my voice, and I clung to him, my joy turning to tears as I remembered this wasn't real.
“Hush, my heart,” he said, but I just cried harder, my cheek pressed against the leather cuirass on his chest. He was still human, dressed in uniform to denote his rank as Roman Legate. He was the commander of a legion of men, a powerful man in his own right, a soldier, a hero to his men ... but a fragile thing compared to the vampire he had become. “You should not have brought me back, Jéhenne.”
I stopped abruptly and looked up into his eyes, seeing such sadness in the vivid blue I loved so much.
I gripped his arms, looking at him in disbelief. “I had to ... I can't ... I can't be without you. I won't!” I shouted.
He shook his head. “You have so much to do. I'm just getting in your way. Give me peace, my heart.”
I shook my head, understanding what he was asking for. “No.” The tears rolled down my face, hot against my skin, my eyes burning. “No. Never.”
I pulled his head down to me before he could say another word and kissed him, kissed him as though I needed it to breathe, to make my heart beat and my blood flow. It was true after all. His arms held me too tight, hurting me they pulled so hard, but I was holding him the same way - daring the gods to tear us apart. I would destroy everything and anyone who stood between us.
We broke apart gasping, and I laid my head on his shoulder. His hand went to my hair, stroking gently, murmuring soft words. “I'm here, my love. I'm here. I love you ... I won't let you down.” I looked up to smile at him and gasped in shock ...
***
I woke with a start to find a strong pair of arms wrapped around me and Lucas' head buried against my shoulder. I kicked him, and he woke, wide-eyed and alarmed.
“Get away from me!” I screamed as he scrambled back, and I ran for the bathroom, slamming the door behind me.
I stood with my arms braced on the sink to keep me upright and gasped for breath, but sorrow and fear welled up and a sob caught in my throat. I bowed my head, determined not to cry, but my head was in turmoil.
There was a quiet knock at the door.
“Jéhenne?” I swallowed hard and ran the cold tap, splashing the water over my face and forcing myself to take a deep breath. “Jéhenne, are you alright?” Lucas asked, and I almost laughed.
“Yeah,” I said, though my voice was trembling.
There was a pause. “Can I come in?”
“No!” I practically screamed before collecting myself. “I mean ... No, thank you. I'm fine really.”
“Well ... OK then,” he replied, clearly not believing a word of it. “I'm not going anywhere, though, so ... I'm here, Jéhenne ... I'm here if you need me.”
I slid down the wall and sat on the cold, tiled floor and put my head in my hands.
***
Once I'd got my head together I went to find Cain, taking care not to disturb Lucas on my way through. I couldn't handle seeing him right now.
Cain, predictably, was in the kitchen ploughing through enough food to supply the Marine corps. Nerva, Corvus’ loyal white crow, sat on his shoulder looking more flea-bitten than ever and Cain reached up and fed him a tiny piece of waffle. Nerva pecked at it half-heartedly, dropping crumbs on Cain's shoulder. I sat beside him and reached for one myself, but Cain smacked my hand away.
“Get your own,” he mumbled.
“Oh, you'll share with Nerva but not your own sister. That's nice.” I huffed at him.
“He doesn't eat enough to feed three people.”
I snorted and muttered that it must run in the family while I followed my nose until I found a stack of waffles in the warming oven. I helped myself and when I finally considered them suitably drowned in maple syrup I went back to the table, taking the syrup bottle with me just in case. Once upon a time misery and stress would have stopped me eating. Cain had forced me past that point, making me eat even if the food lodged in my throat. He had pushed me to understand that I had to eat to be strong. With everything I did, whether it was training with him or actually fighting for my life, I burned through a lot of calories. I had to be strong to survive and so I ate. Possibly waffles weren't the best choice, but Cain had a surprisingly sweet tooth and loved junk food himself so he never moaned at me for eating crap as long as I covered all the other bases. As he'd cheerfully pointed out, I was more than likely to die a violent death. It was unlikely to be heart disease that did it for me.
“Who was it?” he asked, before reaching for his coffee.
I started at the question, guilt burning through me until I realised he couldn't possibly know about my dream. Even Cain wasn't that omniscient.
“Who was what?” I asked.
He put his mug down and reached for the maple syrup I'd brought and bathed a new stack of five waffles liberally before he answered. “There was some powerful shit in your room last night.”
“Oh.” I nodded and swallowed, waving my fork at him. “You won't believe it.” I snorted and nearly choked myself on a waffle crumb that went down the wrong way. “I don't believe it,” I spluttered, my eyes watering.
Cain rolled his eyes and passed me his coffee. I took a gulp, scalding the roof of my mouth and downing enough caffeine in one mouthful to keep me awake for a fortnight.
“Shit, Cain, how do you drink that ... Ugh!” I stuffed down another bite of waffled to kill the taste. No wonder my brother had a short fuse, it wasn't just the red hair.
“Come on then, spit it out,” he urged, curiosity in his eyes.
I swallowed and turned to look at him, wanting to gauge his reaction. “It was my mother, my real Mother ... Hekatê.”
He held my eyes for a moment, not the slightest flicker of reaction and then he nodded as though it made perfect sense.
I was immediately furious. “You knew!” I yelled at him, thumping his arm. “You bastard! You knew and you didn't tell me!”
He scowled at me and shook his head. “I didn't know, I swear it, but ... I figured it had to be something like this. It ... It just makes sense.”
“In what fucked up version of the world does this make the slightest bit of sense?” I demanded, totally incredulous that he could say something so extraordinary with a straight face.
I watched as he sighed and put down his knife and fork, aware that he wasn't going to be able t
o eat in peace until he'd explained himself. “Jéhenne,” he said, clearly striving to add some measure of patience into his voice. “I told you before that there was something about you. You're a beautiful girl but,” he hesitated and furious as I was it was still amusing to see him trying to be tactful. “But you're not ... that beautiful. So why are all these powerful men falling over themselves to be with you? Dis Pater, Corvus, Corin. They're not your average men, Nina, and you're just not that special.”
“Thanks a bunch,” I muttered, and he snorted with amusement.
“Oh, come on. You've got a worse temper than me, you're pig-headed and you're a magnet for trouble of the worst kind. You're not exactly a catch are you?”
I spluttered at his description and wondered when he'd decided to give up trying to be tactful. I would have thumped him again but unfortunately it was all too true.
“Takes one to know one,” I snapped, feeling aggrieved.
Cain shrugged, apparently unperturbed. “True enough but the fact remains, those men were drawn to you for a reason. The fact that you're the reincarnation of Circe makes complete sense to me.”
“I never said it was Circe.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Who else?”
I huffed, irritated that he could be so reasonable in the face of such insanity. Cain just frowned and took another large bite of waffle. “So,” he mumbled through his food. “That makes ... Apollo your father?” he asked.
I nodded. “What do you know about him?”
I got another shrug in reply until he took a large gulp of coffee. I grimaced just watching him. “Not much,” he admitted. “He faded as far as I know.”
“Faded?”
“Uh-huh, it's what happens to gods when their powers wane, when people forget them and no longer worship. They just kind of ... fade away.”
I shuddered and a feeling close to sorrow swept over me. I hadn't even met him. I wondered if he'd be easier to deal with than Hekatê or worse? Maybe it was for the best.
I felt Cain's eyes on me and looked up.
“Want me to find out about him?” he offered. I nodded.
“Thanks.”
He went to take another bite of waffle and suddenly his fork clattered onto his plate. He looked at me, eyes wide. “It was Hekatê,” he said. It took me a moment to realise what he was saying but then I nodded.
“Yes.” I reached over and put my hand on his arm. “She knew I'd end up back here, sooner or later so ...”
“She gave me your powers,” he finished.
“Yes, and made the Sibyl warn you I'd be coming back ...” I smiled at him, though he wasn't looking at me. “That I'd need you.”
He just sat staring across the table, and I wondered what he was thinking. I wished I knew more about him, the brother who had sacrificed so much to be with me now.
“You OK?”
He looked around as though he'd only just remembered I was there at all. “Fine.”
I sighed. He picked up his fork again as though nothing had happened. “Cain, did you ever marry?”
He stopped with the fork halfway to his mouth. “What kind of question is that?” he asked in annoyance.
“Um, the normal kind?” I said, rolling my eyes at him. “Come on, you know pretty much everything there is to know about me. Far more than I'm comfortable with,” I added, remembering the awkward conversations I'd had with him about Corin.
“Me too,” he replied with a grimace. “All the more reason not to ask any more stupid questions.”
“It isn't stupid!” I snapped, getting up to make myself a cup of tea. “I want to know more about you.”
“You know everything you need to know,” he grumbled.
I filled the kettle and turned to glare at him. “I know you were my little brother in my first lifetime, that you blamed yourself when I died and that Hekatê gave you my powers. I know you've sold your soul piece by piece to be here for me now.” I paused and lowered my voice to make sure he heard the truth of my words. “I know I will do anything it takes to keep you safe and to repay you for everything you've done for me.”
He scowled and refused to look at me, and I sighed inwardly. “Come on, Cain. You've lived nearly two thousand years. I just want to know a little bit about my brother other than the fact he likes to yell at me and never lets me down.”
He pushed his chair back and got to his feet, and I knew the conversation was over.
“You don't owe me anything, Jéhenne,” he said, heading for the door. He paused with his hand on the jamb and turned back to me. “I was married once,” he added. “Briefly. It was a mistake I won't repeat.”
***
Training with Cain was a tense affair. After an interrogation about my intentions with Hekatê, I'd casually explained the details of our new partnership and the plan to destroy Dis Pater and predictably he'd gone completely mental. I doubted I'd heard the last of it but at least he hadn't washed his hands of me. That meant I'd be treated to a lot more ranting and lectures about my stupidity but that was nothing new, and in the end he'd pull out all the stops to help me just the same.
I was almost relieved to retreat to Corvus' office and the pile of books Lucas had left out for me to swat up on for the coming visit from the vampire Senate. I studied hard, with far more diligence than I'd ever shown at school but by early evening I was cross eyed and my head was spinning. I needed to see Corvus. The dream had left me aching to be with him. He'd still be sleeping for an hour or so yet so at least he wouldn't try and rip my head off for a while.
As I'd expected, Kai was with him. He looked at me as I walked in, his apple green eyes wary as I headed towards the cage and looked down at Corvus, sleeping on the floor. We'd tried to make him comfortable and given him a mattress to sleep on but he had just shredded it in rage as he did with anything that entered his cage once he was awake.
“Hey,” I said with a smile.
“Hey, Jéhenne.” He was sitting cross legged on the floor in front of the cage with Max stretched out beside him. Kai was rubbing his belly while the massive cat purred, legs akimbo. Both of them acting as though the vampiric cat was actually just a gigantic kitten. I moved to sit beside them. Hesitating for a moment I forced myself to try and be the touchy feely type and put my arm around his shoulders. He sighed and leaned into me.
“You’re not alone, Kai,” I said softly. “You're part of the family now. You don't have to be on your own anymore.” He looked up at me and blinked, his eyes bright and then smiled, leaning his head on my shoulder. “I wondered if you'd like to go shopping with me some time?” I added. “Get you some things of your own.”
His head came up and his eyes widened, a grin spreading over his face. “Truly?”
I nodded, and he threw his arms around me, hugging me tight. I laughed and hugged him back. If only everyone was as easy to please.
I looked down at him just as his face changed, terror in his eyes as I felt the first wash of power sweep over the room. We both ducked, Max hissing with fear as we were driven to the floor by the pulse of sheer power that crushed us as a blinding light split the air and Sariel appeared before us.
Chapter 19
Sariel's violet eyes swept over us and then he turned to the cage, his vast wings trailing a shimmer of gold across the wooden floor at his feet. Corvus was sleeping, the sleep of the dead, undisturbed by angels or madness.
Kai quivered with fear beside me, Max standing in front of me with his fur all on end, a low growl rumbling through his chest. I patted both of them, assuring them they were in no danger before moving forward with my heart beating too fast. Fear and hope and desperation pulsed through my veins like a powerful cocktail, making me giddy with everything I wanted.
“Sariel,” I said by way of greeting, keeping my tone respectful for once. “Thank you for coming.”
He didn't look at me, his eyes trained on the slumbering body in the cage. “I'm impressed,” he said, and to my surprise I realised he meant it.
&n
bsp; “I didn't do it alone,” I replied and saw him nod.
“I know.” He turned to me, and I took a breath as his eyes held mine. It was always disturbing to look into his eyes. He knew. He knew everything. “That is, in part, what is impressive. That you can inspire such devotion in people, Jéhenne. People follow you, even into the depths of hell. Have you noticed that?” There was a flicker of amusement in his eyes, and I shrugged, unsure of what he wanted from me.
“I know my true name,” I blurted out, discomforted to the point that I had to say something.
A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “I know.”
I laughed uneasily, of course he knew. He walked around the cage and the dim light of the room illuminated his massive wings. They glowed in shades of bronze and copper and gold and it was all I could do not to reach over and stroke them. I had always wondered if they were as soft as they looked. He shook them out suddenly, and I started and then caught the glimmer in his eyes. He was laughing at me. I swallowed and took a step forward, looking at him through the bars of the cage.
“Can you help him?” I asked, hardly daring to breath, hearing the desperation in my voice. I clenched my fists, unsure of what I would do if he refused. His eyes held mine for a moment, and I forced myself not to look away. Let him see then. Let him see everything I was ... all that would be lost without Corvus. He nodded.
“Yes, Jéhenne,” he said. “I can help but ...” He paused and walked around until he was standing beside me. “He won't be as you remember him.”
I swallowed, forcing myself not to react. Not yet. “What do you mean?” I asked, emotion clogging my voice.
“I can take the madness from his mind but to do it I must take him, mentally at least, back into his past. I cannot guarantee that he will remember either his human life or his time with you in this lifetime. It is probable that he won't remember anything at all in fact before the moment I awaken him. He will have forgotten the man he was, the man he became.”
The Fires of Tartarus Page 14