“But?”
He nodded. “But ...” he repeated with a grim smile. “It won't finish him. The Knife is a powerful weapon and it will do him great harm, but Dis Pater is not just any supernatural creature. He is a god.”
I cursed and then looked up at him, wondering where this was going. “You said you had something for me?”
He smiled and it was far too wicked an expression to see on an angel's face. A tremor of fear ran over me, and I was thankful it was Dis Pater he hated. He put down his mug, apparently the novelty of tea having worn off, and moved to stand in front of me. I swallowed with unease at having him so close and being the centre of his attention.
“You've always wanted to touch them I think?” he said, his voice soft and my eyes widened with surprise and alarm as I realised what he was referring to.
His wings were massive and powerful, and he was right. I'd always been curious to know if they were as soft as they appeared to be. Cain had told me to never, ever consider trying it. It was considered a very intimate gesture as far as an angel was concerned and likely to end in imminent death to anyone foolhardy enough to give it a go uninvited.
I felt myself blush, squirming inwardly as he watched me. The idea that he knew I'd thought about it was very unsettling. He didn't look unsettled, however. Not even a little. He was enjoying this, and there was a glint in his eyes that I was pretty sure was amusement.
“It's alright, Jéhenne, go ahead.”
His mouth twitched a little. Yup, angel, vampire or human, the male of the species were all the same underneath.
I looked up at him and cleared my throat. “Umm, why are you doing this?”
His mouth quirked a little further now, that was definitely a smile. “I'm giving you a gift,” he said, and I could hear the laughter in his voice. “You may not know this, but a feather from an angel's wing is an immensely powerful thing.”
“Oh?” OK he had my attention now. “How powerful?”
“In the right hands ... powerful enough to kill a god.”
I grinned at him, loving the fact that he was so on board with my plans. “OK, I'm liking the gift now.”
He chuckled and there was a rush of air as he shook out his wings. “Help yourself,” he said, his eyes glittering with anticipation.
My mouth was suddenly dry and this felt weird, but I stepped forward, touched my fingers to his wings ... and sighed.
When I was a kid one of my classmates had brought her pet chinchilla to school, and it was the softest thing I'd ever touched. Compared to his wings it might as well have been sandpaper. The feel of them was like nothing else, a whisper of silk over my skin but warm and so very inviting. The more I touched them - stroking my hand from the high curve down to the longest feathers - the more I wanted to continue. It was soothing, sensual, and strangely addictive. I looked at my fingers which were covered in gold dust, glittering in the light as I turned my hand back and forth. I couldn't help it. I reached up and swept my hand over them again, slowly, revelling in the feel as they slid beneath my hand.
I reached up again, finding the softest, shortest feather between his shoulder blades where the wings met. It was enticingly warm, and I trailed my fingers through them, following the path of his spine.
I realised suddenly that Sariel had gone very still. I froze and wondered which of us had overstepped the mark. I certainly hadn't meant to.
I moved slightly so I could see his face. He was standing with his eyes closed. OK this was awkward now.
I cleared my throat, loudly. “Er, so which do I pick?” I asked, striving to sound normal and failing badly.
He didn't answer at once and definitely sounded rather strained when he did. “None of the largest ones but higher up. Choose whichever you desire.” The timbre of his voice made the words burn over my skin, and I decided I'd better move quickly.
“OK, then,” I muttered and reached up, making my selection. “Do I just pull it out?” I asked, feeling anxious in case I hurt him.
“Yes,” he said.
I curled my fingers around the calamus and gave a sharp tug. I heard him gasp.
“Sorry.” I walked around and showed him the one I'd chosen. It was beautiful, starting in a rich chocolate brown and then moving through bronze and copper to gold at the end. “Is this OK?”
He smiled at me. “Yes, that's fine. Take care of it, Jéhenne. You have no idea how precious that is.”
I stroked my finger over it and then froze as I realised how his eyes were following the movement. I blushed, feeling my cheeks blaze.
“I'm sorry, Jéhenne,” he said, looking at my heated skin with amusement. “It has been a ... very long time since anyone touched me.”
I bit my lip. “That's ... a pity,” I said, wincing inwardly as I wasn't sure that was what I'd meant to say but damn it was a pity. What a waste. I wondered if the half-demon had been the last.
I coughed and tried to bring the conversation back to the far safer subject of killing gods. “So what do I do with it?” I asked, holding the feather up.
“Ask your brother,” he said with a grim smile. “He'll know.”
Of course he would.
I frowned, twisting the feather back and forth as something occurred to me. “Sariel, you said you couldn't be seen to be involved with this plan.” I held the feather up. “Won't this kind of give you up?”
He gave a sly smile, and I wondered just what angels could get away with and still be angels. “In the first place it will be destroyed utterly when Dis Pater dies, so there will be no physical evidence, though it will be obvious that a feather was used in the weapon. As it happens I was once responsible for collecting such gifts as these. It is strictly forbidden for them to be given away, such is their power. But of course there are always those who bend the rules.”
I raised my eyebrows at him and his mouth twitched. “I was selected for the job as I had never done such a thing myself, but I was very careful to keep every single feather I retrieved from a variety of donors.”
“So why not use theirs instead of yours, remove the possibility of blame going to you?”
“For the same reason you want Dis Pater to look in your eyes when you send him to Tartarus, Jéhenne. So that he knows you did it to him. It is a risk I am willing to take.”
I nodded, totally understanding his need for revenge. “So ...” I said. “Dis Pater will know you had a hand in his demise and your brethren may suspect, but they can't accuse you because you've got something on them already.” He smirked, and I laughed. “You cunning devil.”
He raised his eyebrows at that and reached for his mug of tea, raising it in a toast.
Chapter 29
I found Cain in one of the outbuildings, and he looked up with an uncharacteristic expression of alarm as I walked in.
“Oh, thank the gods,” he sighed, returning his attention to a frankly terrifying collection of knives, daggers and throwing stars which he was in the process of cleaning and sharpening.
“What's up with you?” I asked, concerned that there was some other shit about to rain down on us that he hadn't told me about.
“Kai,” he said succinctly. “I came in here to work in peace, and he comes running in sobbing.” He caught my look of horror and scowled. “I did my best to express concern for his well-being.”
I put my head in my hands and groaned at the idea. “We really need to talk about improving your social skills. Perhaps in time we can find a way to reintroduce you into the community,” I said, sounding skeptical, and he glared and me and huffed in annoyance.
“What the hell was it all about anyway?” he demanded, waving a dagger in my face with no clue as to how threatening someone who didn't know him really well would find it.
I rolled my eyes at him. “Well if you'd have bothered to ask Kai you might have found out.”
“Yes,” he nodded. “And he might have told me.” He shuddered, and I shook my head in despair. His eyes narrowed. “And for the record, as f
ar as I'm concerned the community can go to hell. I don't need or want social skills!”
He flung the dagger across the barn where it hit the dead centre of a target he'd hung with a sharp thud.
“Maybe that's for the best,” I said faintly.
He went and retrieved the dagger. “So did you want something or did you just come to annoy me?”
“Actually I have something for you. Something very special.” I grinned at him.
“What kind of something?” he asked, looking suspicious.
“The kind that could kill a god,” I replied.
His face lit up like a kid being offered ice-cream. “Show me!” he demanded.
I opened up the leather document folder I'd found to keep the feather safe and took it out, handing it to Cain. He automatically stretched his hand out to take it before he'd seen what I was offering and then snatched it back again as he realised what I was holding. His eyes widened.
“Is that ...?”
“Sariel's,” I said, nodding. “An angel feather.”
The expression on his face was a picture. “Shit, Jéhenne,” he murmured, shaking his head slowly. “You have some fucking scary friends.”
I looked at him in astonishment. “Have you seen my enemies?”
He stared at the feather with such awe that I started to feel uncomfortable. He glanced up at me.
“You don't get it do you?” he said. “You have no idea what power this holds, how rare this thing is.”
I shrugged. “He wants Dis Pater to pay as much as I do.”
He snorted and shook his head. “No shit.” He closed the leather case, as though he didn't want to look at it any more. “Wars have been fought over things like this, Jéhenne.”
“This is a war, Cain,” I said, my voice hard. “A war between us and a tyrant and that,” I said pointing at the case holding the feather. “That is our victory.”
Cain nodded, his face grim. “OK, then.”
“Sariel said you'd know what to do with it.”
“Yeah,” he said, his voice quiet. “I know.”
I sighed. At least amongst the ruins of my life I would claim this one victory. Revenge might not be the most honourable motivation but damn it was effective. It was a reason to keep going when everything else seemed to be disintegrating around me.
Cain picked up the case and frowned at me. I blinked at him as I realised I'd been lost in thought.
“What is it?” he asked.
“I was just wondering what it would feel like when Dis Pater was gone. What if I get rid of him but Corvus still doesn't remember, still doesn't love me. What will I do then? Will it all have been for nothing?”
“You're a goddess, Jéhenne,” he said, his tone dry. “Master of this family and you will rule the Underworld with Hekatê. I think you'll have enough to take your mind off Corvus. You'll accomplish great things. It won't have been in vain, not if I know you.” He smiled at me, and it was a warm smile; or as close as Cain could get to it.
I gave a huff of laughter. “Well, I guess I should manage OK with you to keep me in line, eh?”
His smile seemed to become fixed, brittle, and he turned suddenly away from me. “Cain?”
“I have to go and get on with this,” he said, holding the case up. “It's delicate work and it will take a while. Don't want to hold up the plan do you?” he said, moving away from me but I reached out and grabbed hold of his arm.
“What aren't you telling me?”
“Shit, Jéhenne, you're not expecting me to spill all my dirty secrets are you? It would take a few centuries to get through that lot,” he smirked, but I could tell it was forced. He was covering something.
“Are you leaving?” I demanded. “Is that it?”
He pulled his arm away from me.
“It is, isn't it?” I said feeling hurt. “You're going to leave.”
He ran a hand through his hair, making it stick up at weird angles and avoided my gaze.
“Why?” I asked, unable to keep the hurt from my voice.
He paused, not looking at me, and when he finally spoke his voice was hard. “Jéhenne, I've spent my entire life working towards your brilliant future, because you needed me. But once Dis Pater is gone, my part in your great destiny is done. You won't need me any more, so give me a break OK. Maybe I'd like to try and find a life of my own instead of living forever in your shadow. Did you ever think about that?”
I took a step back, shocked by his tone. I knew Cain wasn't the affectionate type, but I'd thought he'd come to care for me, to like having me around despite the usual sibling irritations. “I would never try to stop you having a life, Cain ... I--I just like having you around. You're my brother and ... I love you.”
He turned his back on me, and I couldn't see anything but the stiff line of his shoulders.
“I'll stay until you're safe, Jéhenne,” he said and walked out of the room without another word.
I stood staring after him and then leapt with shock as the air around me became charged and Sariel was standing beside me again.
I was too upset to complain about another abrupt arrival and just stood wondering what the hell had just happened.
“He's afraid, Jéhenne,” Sariel said, and I heard the swish of his wings as he moved towards me.
“Afraid of what?” I asked, my voice thick.
Sariel hesitated, obviously wondering whether to break whatever news he had gently or not.
“He's dying,” he said, obviously deciding on the direct approach.
“What?” I spun around, staring at him. “No!” I exclaimed. “He ... He can't be.”
“He's as old as Corvus, Jéhenne, and he is not a vampire. He was not supposed to live the life he has. He has defied fate and the gods. It was only by Hekatê's intervention that he gained the Sibyl's prediction that you would need someone to protect you. He took that role as his own. She and your mother interfered in a fate they were not supposed to touch. They changed his history.”
“So?” I shouted. “So what? He's here and I still need him. He can't ...” My voice broke and Sariel looked at me with sympathy.
“He has made use of dark forces, used blood sacrifice ... He bargained with his own soul. He is beyond redemption.”
“No!” I yelled and flames blazes at my wrists with such heat that the straw in the barn caught and began to smoulder and burn. “Do something, damn you!” I shouted.
Sariel scowled at me and there was a rush of frigid air that put out the fire and chilled me to the marrow of my bones. “Remember to whom you speak,” he said, the words just as icy, and I shivered.
“Please, Sariel,” I said, running to stand in front of him. “I'll beg you if you want me to but please ... Don't let Cain die, you have to help him.”
I felt fear clutch at my heart at the idea that my brother would be taken from me so soon. I'd only just got to know him, to see past the bad temper and fearsome reputation to the man underneath. The man who had sacrificed any chance at a normal life to be here now, for me. I swallowed as Sariel's face softened, knowing this wasn't going to be an offer of help.
“Jéhenne, there is truly nothing I can do. No one can help him, not you nor I or any other power in the world. The only person who can save Cain is Cain himself, and I think he has ventured too far into the darkness to find his way back again.”
“You're telling me there's no hope for him?” I asked, almost shouting because ... he was an angel. What the bloody hell was the point of him if he couldn't save a lost soul?
He shook his head. “There is always hope, but it is Cain who needs to find something to hope for. There is nothing you can do.”
“But you said he was afraid,” I persisted. “If he has given up, if he has nothing to live for, to hope for, why would he be afraid?”
Sariel reached out a hand and touched my cheek, and it was like all the sharp edges of my emotions smoothed away. I felt calmer, more accepting of what I was being told. I kind of hated him for it.
>
“He cares for you, Jéhenne, more than he expected to - for all of you. He accepted his fate a long time ago but you have created a family here, and not just the family that Corvus created. You have friends, loved ones, people who depend and look up to you. He never expected to be a part of that and ... he regrets that he will soon lose it.”
“But then he does have something to hope for?”
“He gave up, Jéhenne. He doesn't believe there is anything in him except for destruction and violence, and at this point in his life there is too much truth in that for him to try and fight it.”
“How long?” I asked, wondering why it was that anything I cared for had to be taken from me.
Sariel shrugged. “He's strong and it is in his nature to fight no matter the outcome, but he can feel the touch of evil around him. It rather depends on the toll the battle with Dis Pater takes on him. If he escapes unscathed he may have a year or two yet. If not ...” He paused, looking at me with those cool violet eyes. “If not he will be weakened and the forces he has bargained with will overwhelm him soon enough. They will take the power that has been lent to him and his energy will be used by the evil in this world.”
I felt sick, chilled beneath my skin, as though my blood was cold and thick in my veins, freezing painfully around my heart. “Will he know, will he be ... aware of it.”
He nodded. “He's damned, Jéhenne, and that is the price for his sin.”
Chapter 30
Even with the calming effect of Sariel's touch I was in a bleak frame of mind as I walked back to the Château. Cain was my blood, my family and someone I'd only just begun to know. The idea that I would lose him so soon, and in such a way ... It made my heart ache, for both of us.
The night was humid and damp, and I shivered despite the heavy warmth in the air as I walked beneath the dripping trees. A cool drop of water fell down the back of my neck, increasing the clammy feel over my skin. I looked up at the sky, but there were no stars. They were obscured by a dark mass of murky cloud that lingered with an ominous weight. There would be a storm soon. The air around me seemed to glower with the oppressive force of the atmosphere. I went to move forward again and then lurched to a halt as a rush of energy washed over me. I gasped and reached out, clutching at a branch to steady myself as the power pulsed through me. What the hell? A breeze whispered through the trees, the first stirrings of the storm approaching and over the sound of the rustling leaves I began to hear voices. A chant lifted on the heated air and raised the hairs on the back of my neck. I closed my eyes and found Decimus once more.
The Fires of Tartarus Page 23