I laugh as the Masons continue razzing each other. Oliver wraps his arm around Siggy and kisses her cheek.
The vibe in this room is what I want in life.
My gaze falls to Rosie. Someday, little girl, I’ll find this for us.
As if she can hear my thoughts, she looks up at me. “’Mere.”
I walk over to her. “How are you doing?”
“Good. They’re loud,” Rosie says.
“Yes, they are.”
Rosie scoots around and rests the back of her head on my chest. I swipe the hair off her forehead and kiss the top of her head.
“Jaxi,” Siggy says, coming around the counter. “While they’re occupied, could I show you what we brought? Just in case you don’t want something or have questions?”
“Sure.”
“Can I come?” Rosie asks.
“You sure can,” I say, picking her up and putting her on the floor.
Rosie takes my hand immediately. It causes the breath in my chest to hold.
I normally feel really alone in situations like this. I think I stick out like a sore thumb. But having a child need me, be mine, is something that I always expected would be a joy.
I never realized just how different it would really make things.
When the house empties this evening, Rosie will be here. If Boone tells us we’re screwing up his life, Rosie and I will leave. If I find myself in another shitty apartment in the city with a douchebag of a landlord, I won’t sit alone at night while I cry into my ramen. And while I don’t know what Rosie has been through in her life, she’ll always have me.
She looks up at me and smiles.
That feels really, really nice.
The three of us walk down the hallway and into a bedroom on the right. I helped Boone carry a bunch of boxes and suitcases and totes from this room into the garage earlier. It’s a decent-sized room with a big window overlooking the driveway. Once we opened the blinds, the room was bathed in sunlight.
“That box is a toddler bed with removable rails so you can still use it as she gets older,” she says, pointing at a long box against the back wall. “There’s a dresser to match.” She moves into the room and looks around. “We got a couple of lamps and a bookcase. And books, of course. And a few stuffed animals because I wasn’t sure what she loved.”
“Is this for me?” Rosie looks up at Siggy. “Will this be where I sleep?”
Siggy kneels. “Do you like it here?”
Rosie nods.
“We wanted you to feel happy here, so we got you some fun things for your room,” Siggy tells her. “A big girl like you should have her own big girl bed.”
“I slept on the couch at my mommy’s house. Mommy and Kurt slept in the bed.”
I twist my lips and close my eyes.
“Well, now you’ll have your own bed,” Siggy says softly. “Right across the hall from Boone and Jaxi.”
My eyes fly open. Thank God Siggy isn’t looking at me.
My heartbeat races at the thought of sleeping arrangements for me. I hadn’t thought of this. Of course, I’ll sleep on the sofa, but why does Siggy think I’ll sleep with Boone? What did he tell her?
My insides wither.
“Hey, Mom,” Wade says from the doorway. “There’s a lady here from Halcyon. Ellie, I think? She said you have an order of children’s clothes that she’s delivering, and I don’t know what to tell her.”
Siggy stands. “Ah, yes. I’ll take care of that.” She slips out the door, her heels clicking on the tile down the hallway.
Wade turns to follow her. Rosie lunges forward.
“Can I see your watch?” she asks him.
He looks at me, his brow furrowed. “Sure.” He stretches his arm out for Rosie. She touches the face. “I like it.”
“Thanks,” he says.
He pulls his arm back. “I’m Wade.”
“I’m Rosie.” Rosie steps toward him.
He looks down at her like a caged animal. She smiles up and moves right along with him.
“Well, okay then …” Wade tries to sidestep her and fails.
“Okay then,” Rosie repeats, sticking right with him.
Wade backs out into the hall, looking at me warily. I just laugh.
“Hey,” Rosie says to him.
“Um, hey, what?” Wade says back.
“Do you like dogs?”
“I guess.”
“I like dogs,” she says as they disappear from my sight.
The moment I’m alone, the adrenaline from meeting everyone is stripped from me. My body aches with stress, and suddenly, the weight of the past few days sits ripely on my heart.
I run a hand down my face as I try to talk myself down from the proverbial ledge.
This is going to be fine. You can trust them. Take things one day at a time.
I walk to the window and look outside. The afternoon is bright and sunny. Children play on the sidewalk. Beautiful houses and fabulous cars line the street.
It’s a picture-perfect vision.
One I don’t belong in.
This isn’t my reality. I screwed up and landed here by accident—quite literally.
I press my thumb to the inside of my elbow.
Use this as a springboard, be grateful, and get out of here before they see you for what you are.
My nail bites into my skin, and I wince at the pain.
“Hey.” Boone’s voice makes me turn.
He’s leaned against the doorframe, one long leg crossed over the other. He knows whatever I was thinking isn’t nice. I can tell by the way he holds his face.
“What are you thinking?” he asks.
I don’t tell him because I know what he’ll say. We’ve been through this.
Instead, I give him the best smile I can manage.
“Your family is great,” I say.
“They are.”
I wait for him to expound on that, but he doesn’t.
“How do they just accept people so easily?” I ask. “You would think they’ve known me and Rosie forever.”
He pushes off the doorway. Standing in front of me, he peers down.
“You didn’t answer my question,” he says.
“By design.”
“Why?”
I sigh. “I don’t know what I’m thinking, to be honest. I don’t know what to think. It’s like all of this stuff happened in my life at one moment.” I take a deep breath. “I think about it and how you, a man I didn’t know, were there to help me pick up the pieces. It’s wild, don’t you think?”
“Not really.”
I make a face. “How can this work out so perfectly?”
How can you be so perfect?
My stomach flip-flops at the predicament I’m in. Having Boone and the whole Mason clan to lean on is a prayer I didn’t even have the guts to pray. Yet they aren’t my family. They don’t owe me a thing. Their kindness and willingness to include Rosie and me in their lives can be withdrawn as readily as it was given.
As glorious as this afternoon has been, I know that losing this would hurt more than not having it.
For Rosie.
And for me.
It’s a double-edged sword.
“My grandma Annabelle used to say that nothing happens by accident. Holt just reminded me of that,” he says, his voice gruffer than usual. “That’s how it can work out so perfectly, as you say.”
He’s so wide that I can’t see around him. He’s so tall I can’t see over him. He’s so all-consuming that I can’t focus on anything but him.
I should say something to use as a defense. It would be smart to throw up a few quick roadblocks because I can guess where he’s going with this. But the intensity in his eyes, mixed with the sincerity that routinely takes my breath away, has me rendered speechless.
“If nothing happens by accident,” he says, “that means everything that happens is purposeful.”
My blood begins to pound through my veins.
He takes a step closer to me.
/>
“And that means you dropped into my life for a reason,” he says.
“I dropped into your life because you don’t lock your windows,” I say, hoping he’ll get distracted from where this is going.
He doesn’t. His eyes just burn hotter.
“I’m going to be honest—I don’t know what to think either. I like having you here,” he says quietly. “I liked having you here before Rosie, but I like her too. I can’t explain it. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but I do.”
It doesn’t make sense knowing the risks, but I like being here too. It feels safe. It’s easy. He’s wonderful. But that doesn’t mean it’s anything I should put stock in—especially when everything is so new.
“It’s only been a couple of days, Boone. Let’s give it time.”
He nods. “Yes, let’s.”
I don’t know what that means. I’m afraid to think about it. He’s talking out of his ass, if he means what I think he means.
What on earth would he do with Rosie and me?
Maybe we can be friends. Maybe we can even be fuck buddies at some point once I figure out this new role in my life, but that’s not now.
It can’t be.
That would be insane.
He takes a step closer, cutting the distance between us in half. I can feel his chest moving as he breathes. The energy wafting off him in continuous waves makes me dizzy.
He reaches up and touches my chin. His fingers zap my skin, sending sparks all the way to my toes.
“You better be careful,” I whisper. “There is a house full of people out there.”
A slow, sly smile splits his cheeks.
My throat burns as I nearly pant at the feel of his hand against my face.
“Should I close the door?” he asks.
“You still haven’t learned to lock things?”
He chuckles, his chest rumbling next to mine.
I’m playing a dangerous game here, but I can’t help myself. I like this. I like him.
I’ve never had a man touch me this gently or be so sweet to me. I’ve never felt so seen, so heard, so worthy of communication. I’ve never had someone believe in me so effortlessly. Genuinely. It’s surreal.
It turns out that great shoulders, a sexy back, and an excellent smile aren’t my kryptonite. It’s respect.
Who knew?
Our breathing quickens. My pulse races. His fingers dip into my cheek.
“Boone …”
All of the reasons I shouldn’t do this disappear, and all I can think about is being whisked away from the problems in my life by Boone’s lips.
I want that.
I need that.
He dips his head toward mine, and I tilt my mouth to meet his. His eyes penetrate mine with a sweet heat that makes me moan well before any contact has been made.
I can feel the heat of his breath. The spiciness of his cologne sweeps through my senses.
A small gasp slips by my lips just before his mouth reaches mine.
Oh, my gosh.
I close my eyes and then—
“Boone!” Rosie’s voice billows down the hallway and into the room.
Boone’s fingers press into my cheeks as our eyes fly open.
We part as though we are the children and are being caught by our parents.
“That kid …” He chuckles. “I’m in here!”
Her feet patter against the floor before she rounds the corner and launches herself against Boone’s leg. She looks up at me with chocolate all over her face.
She giggles. “Wade gave me chocolate!”
Boone pats her on the head. “We can tell.”
“Why don’t we go make sure you get some vegetables for once?” I say, picking her up.
She kicks her legs. “I want to play.”
“You need something good to eat,” I tell her, ignoring the heat of Boone’s stare.
I start out of the room. Boone tugs on my shirt.
I look over my shoulder at him.
“Did I overstep?” he whispers.
I consider his question.
It’s better that we didn’t kiss. It’ll only make things murkier. Still, since we didn’t, I guess I can be honest.
“Sadly, no.” I shrug as his eyes go wide. “Now we’re going to get some food.”
He growls behind me and I laugh as we leave him in Rosie’s room.
I carry Rosie toward the commotion in the kitchen and think about what Boone said about his grandma. My grandma had words of wisdom too.
She used to say that if things seemed too good to be true, they usually are.
I hope to God that she’s wrong this time.
Fifteen
Boone
“You’re here early again?” Oliver leans against my office door with a smug grin. “It’s like I don’t even know who you are anymore.”
I sit back in my chair and smooth my tie down the center of my chest. “Don’t worry, Golden Boy. I’m not coming for your job.”
He snorts. “I’m hardly worried about that.” He walks inside and sits down across from me.
The early morning sun rises over downtown Savannah. It’s a really cool thing to watch. It’s my new thing this week—grab a cup of coffee and then wait for the show.
It’s weird being at the company headquarters routinely, let alone at six in the morning. I had an idea about the Greyshell property after talking with Holt on Sunday at my house and came in Monday to work on it. I came back all week.
Turns out, working doesn’t kill me. Who knew?
“How are things going at your place?” Oliver asks. “Is it weird having housemates that you aren’t fucking?”
“Who said I’m not fucking Jaxi?”
He grins.
It’s like he knows that I haven’t slept with her.
Every day that passes, it gets harder—both literally and figuratively. I considered that my attraction to her might lessen over time, that having a child around would make her less sexy.
I was wrong.
My life before this tsunami was a lot of fun. It was wild and filled with late nights and even later mornings. I had a great thing going.
So why am I enjoying this new thing this much?
It’s not hard to enjoy walking into a room and have someone catapult themselves at you like you’re the coolest person in the world. It’s quite nice to have someone expect you to come home in the evening and ask you questions about your day. I love the way the house smells and feels like a home—like burnt food and cleaning supplies and laundry soap.
I’m needed and appreciated because of who I am and not just what I can give someone. It’s pretty fucking fabulous.
As long as I don’t screw it up, anyway.
“Well, look at you,” Holt says, poking his head around the corner. “In the office like a proper fucking adult.”
“Good morning to you, too,” I say.
He grins as he sips his coffee and slides into the chair next to Oliver.
“What are we talking about?” Holt asks.
“Nothing,” Oliver says, his eyes trained on me. “Meaning, how much ass our little brother is getting.”
I rock back in my chair and look at the ceiling. “Grow up, Ollie.”
“I never thought I’d hear Boone telling Oliver to grow up.” Wade walks in and stands behind Holt. “That’s what I heard him say, right?”
“Yup.” Holt laughs. “We’re just teasing you, Boone.”
I sit back up and stare into the faces of my brothers. “Does anyone have anything nice to say to me today?”
“Nope,” Oliver says.
Holt grins.
“I don’t. You look like shit,” Wade says.
He’s right. I know it. I feel like I look like shit.
My back aches from sleeping on the couch. My neck is cramped from the weird bend it has to take to fit on the pillow that clearly wasn’t made to be on a narrow space. I can’t sprawl out or stretch at all, and I woke up this morning de
termined to find a solution to the problem that’s marring me.
But the more I think about it, the more I realize that there’s not another space for me to sleep without losing my workout room. And I don’t want to do that. I also don’t know what to do about that.
I hate being an adult.
I sigh.
“Everything good with Jaxi?” Holt asks. “All joking aside. Don’t say anything stupid, Oliver.”
I consider how to respond to Holt’s question.
Yes, things are good. Very fucking good, really. She’s the easiest woman to be around. We love the same foods, the same movies, and laugh at the same jokes. We work together as a team like nobody’s business. And the sexual tension? It’s in spades.
I can tell she’s intentionally avoiding fucking around with me. Instead of being frustrated, and although I don’t fully understand why, I respect it. She has a lot on her plate and I admire how methodical she’s being about everything.
It’s better than I’d do if I were in her shoes.
“I’m thinking about getting a dog,” I say.
Oliver laughs. “You better slow down with the dog business.”
“Why?” I ask. “A dog would be nice.”
“Does Rosie want a dog?” Holt asks.
I nod but immediately feel embarrassed. “Yes, but it might be nice just having an animal around. They are man’s best friend, you know.”
Wade adjusts his tie. “May I point out to you that a dog is a commitment?”
“Obviously.”
“A long commitment,” he adds.
“Clearly, Wade. You can’t just decide you don’t want it in six weeks. I get it.”
Oliver leans forward. “I mean this nicely, but do you even have that level of commitment with Jaxi and the kid?”
And Wade moves up the Favorite Brother Leaderboard into third place.
Holt watches my reaction with the care of the oldest child.
“I think if you want a dog, you should get a dog,” Holt says.
Oliver makes a scene of looking at him like he’s lost his mind. Holt ignores him.
“I, for one, know what it’s like to fall in love,” Holt says. “It happens so fast you don’t even realize it’s happening.”
But I think I know that it’s happening.
I thought about buying a bigger house today. When I looked at houses on the market, I checked the school ratings in each neighborhood. I asked my secretary to find someone to give swim lessons to a four-year-old.
Reckless (The Mason Family Series Book 3) Page 13