by Lisa Harris
When he’d been given the chance to come home and work the ranch, it had initially just been something to do between leaving the military and figuring out what he was going to do next. It had kept him busy while he worked through the adjustment back to civilian life, but one day, it hit him that he was doing exactly what he loved—spending his days working the land. And while the work was never done, and the hours were long, it gave him a sense of purpose and freedom.
He shoved aside the memories. “We’ve got ten thousand acres nestled beneath incredible views of Pikes Peak. Hunting, hay production, grazing and raising cattle. And what I love is that it’s surrounded by thousands of areas of public land, so it’s private and completely peaceful no matter where you go.”
“Where is it located?”
“It’s about thirty minutes outside Timber Falls.”
She shifted slightly in order to reposition her leg. “I love that town. I try to stop every time I drive through and buy fudge from that little chocolate shop on Main Street.”
“I know the owner. She goes to my church, and yes, her chocolate is to die for.”
“I can see why you came back.” Gwen laid down another word on the board. “I’d like to visit one day.”
He was surprised at her confession, but didn’t miss the flinch in her expression. Like she wanted to take back her words as soon as she said them. Spending more time together after this was over was hard to picture. The two of them had always been like oil and water. But then again, maybe he’d never known the real Gwen. Maybe what he’d believed—like what she’d believed about him all these years—wasn’t true.
“You’d love it,” he said, swapping out three of his tiles. “There’s a view of the mountains on every side, and if you like horseback riding, you won’t find a more perfect setting.”
He rested against the wall, realizing he sounded like a travel agent. While he did love the ranch, when they eventually got out of this—which they would—he had no intention of cultivating their relationship. And he was pretty sure she felt the same. All he wanted to do right now was find a way to escape. Then he would go his way, and she, sadly, would have to deal with the fallout of her brother’s crimes.
“Your family sounds wonderful,” she said. “I always wanted a big family with lots of kids and cousins running around.”
“Me, too.”
Or at least he had. Once. Years ago, with Cammie. Now he didn’t trust women—or his heart—enough to choose the right one a second time.
“And yet somehow you’re still single,” Gwen said.
“Reid and I are holdouts, I suppose, though I’m not sure why he hasn’t been snatched up.”
His brother Griffin had recently asked him about still being single. But as far as he was concerned, he was content with his life and didn’t have to get married to be happy.
“You said you were doing some horse therapy. I’d like to hear more about that.”
Her questions pulled him out of his thoughts, and he realized he’d missed her last move. “Wait a minute…you just scored over a hundred points.”
She shot him a smile. “I always did like this game.”
“And I’m realizing I need to pay more attention.”
He searched for another play, wondering what it was about her that seemed to keep him constantly feeling off balance. Even…vulnerable. Something he was definitely not used to feeling. And the reason evaded him. He didn’t care what she thought about him—he’d determined that a long time ago—and yet somehow that didn’t seem true anymore. He owed her nothing, and yet just like he’d vowed to give his life for his country if necessary, he realized he was willing to do anything to save hers.
He switched his mind back to her interest in horse therapy. That should be a safe place to go.
“I started last year in an effort to help a single father in town and his eight-year-old boy,” he said, adding an s tile to a word. “His physiatrist suggested therapy with a horse, but the family didn’t have the money or the resources. I did a bunch of research and talked to some contacts, and in the end was able to bring the right people together. We have a woman who boards two therapy horses at the ranch and volunteers two days a week. It’s ended up making an amazing difference in her clients’ lives.
“Wow. I’m impressed.”
“At this point, I’m not really personally involved other than offering the ranch.”
Gwen studied the board and then drew new tiles. “It’s interesting that you’ve gotten involved in that kind of therapy.”
“From what I’ve seen so far, the results are amazing.”
Gwen looked up and caught his gaze. “Have you ever thought of expanding the program?”
“At this point, I can’t really call it a program. It’s more of a—a test really. To see what’s possible.”
He studied her, wishing he didn’t feel the subtle attraction between them and wondering how she’d gotten him to talk so much. Normally he was the quiet one, comfortable being with a group of people, while even more at ease alone out on the ranch.
“And yet you’ve already seen the results,” she said. “You’ve got a working cattle ranch. Like with the horses, it’s the perfect place to teach leadership, teamwork, life skills and accountability.”
“Sounds as if you really have thought this out.”
“I have.”
For a moment, the game was forgotten as he focused his attention on her and wished he could ask her what was really on his mind. But maybe he was the only one feeling the unwanted tug of attraction between them.
He shifted uncomfortably on his spot on the floor. “I don’t know. I’ve never thought beyond that one opportunity. To be honest, I don’t know what all the possibilities are.”
“Like I said before, I am pretty passionate about the kids I work with and tend to let my mind go a bit wild with the possibilities.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that. Nothing would move forward without dreams. I’m impressed with what you’re doing. And I’m not just talking about the Scrabble board.”
“Funny.”
He matched her smile, but knew he shouldn’t be flirting with her. There was simply no way to forget who she really was. He was treading far too close to the personal, a place he didn’t need to go, because he shouldn’t like her. Shouldn’t like the way she clearly cared about other people and not only voiced her passion, but was also doing something about it.
He pushed away the memories lurking just below the surface. Maybe he’d been wrong about her, but telling her what had really happened that night with Cammie wouldn’t change anything. He had no desire to go back there and dredge up the past, and trusting his heart again certainly wasn’t going to happen. All that mattered right now was trying to get out of here. There had to be a way, and he just needed to figure it out.
“What are you thinking?” she asked.
“Just working on a plan to get us out of here.”
“You’ve changed,” she said, putting down another word.
“After a decade, I’d hope so.”
“I meant it as a compliment. There’s something about you that wasn’t there before. A focus. A calmness. Besides, I never really did see you with Cammie, anyway. She’s too high-strung.”
“Looks like I’m not the only one who’s changed,” he said, realizing he was moving into risky territory. “I guess I always saw you as caught up with status and image. I’ve enjoyed seeing the other side of you.”
“Cammie was always ready to shop, or get her nails done, or make sure she had the latest fashion. Not that I mind any of those things, but I did find that when I wasn’t around her, they seemed far less important and more frivolous. I guess I was also just growing up and getting involved in a cause I feel passionate about.”
“That feeling you’re making a difference in your life is important
. I had that when I was in the military. When I had to leave, I was lost for a long time. I was used to being a part of this larger team and mission, and when I was on my own I realized I’d lost my direction.”
“What made a difference?”
“There was this old man at church. He challenged me to think about what I really wanted in life and then to not just talk about it, but write it down, and then make the necessary moves to get there. It wasn’t automatic, but it worked for me.”
“Can I ask you something else personal?” she asked.
He nodded, wishing she didn’t both entice and terrify him at the same time.
She hesitated a moment, then said, “Do you have any regrets over not marrying Cammie?”
ELEVEN
Gwen paused again, wondering if she’d pushed too far. But what if she’d been wrong all these years about the man sitting across from her? What if he wasn’t the villain in the story she’d made him out to be? She’d heard Cammie’s version of what had happened that day, had sat with her friend as she’d cried for hours after the breakup. But Cammie had always tended to exaggerate and ensure she was the center of attention. That was part of the reason they’d ended up growing apart over the years. But Gwen’s image of Caden had never changed.
Until now.
“Do I regret our not getting married?” Caden seemed to mull over the question. “At the time, I imagined spending the rest of my life with her, so it was hard, but now…honestly, I have no regrets.”
She listened to him talk and realized there was another thing about their breakup that didn’t make sense. For a girl with a broken heart, Cammie had recovered quickly. In less than a year, she’d become engaged again and this time had gotten married—something that had always surprised Gwen. And now, listening to Caden…he seemed over Cammie, but she couldn’t help but wonder why he hadn’t found anyone else after all this time.
“I know I’m prying,” she continued, “but the night you and Cammie broke up… I had a lot of choice words for you. Words that while they might have been true, probably should have been left unsaid. Or at least toned down.” She glanced back down at the board. “I guess that even after all these years I owe you an apology.”
“Forget it. You don’t owe me anything. Like you said, we’ve both changed. And everything that happened back then… I’m not sure it matters anymore.” Caden shifted his position on the floor. “She was your best friend. You were angry, believing I broke her heart. You also believed I deserved to hear those things. I understood.”
“But something tells me you don’t agree with what I said.”
Caden fiddled with his tiles, but she was pretty sure his heart wasn’t in the game anymore. “There were a lot of things that happened that night that no one except Cammie and I know about. Things that were said between the two of us that I put behind me a long time ago.”
Something about his expression told her there were still things that he was holding on to. Maybe not grief over a broken relationship, but definitely a lack of trust. Was that why he’d never married? She wasn’t sure what it was, but she was missing something.
“You’re not telling me everything, are you?” she asked.
Caden let out a sigh. “I haven’t talked about that night for years, and to be honest, I see no reason to dredge it up now. We went our separate ways, which in the end was fine with me.”
“I understand.” Gwen searched for the right response. “I guess it’s just that I know her side of the story, and I’d like to know yours. It’s something I never gave you a chance to do before. Instead, I made too many judgments.”
Caden frowned as he laid down another word on the Scrabble board. “She’s your friend. It was a long time ago, and honestly, I’d rather leave it in the past.”
Gwen studied his face, trying to read between the lines. “Are you saying if I really knew what happened that night, it might change how I see her?”
“I didn’t say that. What I am saying, though, is that we all made mistakes and said things we shouldn’t have.”
She appreciated his not wanting to speak badly of Cammie, but was he trying to protect her? Or maybe he was right, and what happened was something they needed to just let go of. The situation had been extremely stressful. She remembered that night as if it had been yesterday. She’d ended up making dozens of phone calls, while trying to evade the endless questions by friends and family. People wanted explanations, and as the maid of honor, she’d managed to simply let the guests know that there would be no wedding and leave it at that. She’d never quite understand how two people she’d believed had been in love had just canceled the wedding they’d been anticipating for months. In the days that followed, she’d helped Cammie send back the gifts, dropped off the wedding dress at a bridal shop to sell and fielded dozens of questions from curious friends. It had been frustrating, but as hard as it was, eventually people forgot. Life went on.
“Can I ask one more question?” she asked.
“You can ask.”
“But that doesn’t mean you’ll give me an answer?”
He just shot her a smile.
“Why didn’t you defend yourself back then? There are always two sides to a story, but you just walked away. No one ever knew what you were thinking.”
She wasn’t sure why it mattered that she heard his side of what happened that night, but for some reason—as evasive as he was being—it did.
Caden rested his elbows on his thighs, the game forgotten at the moment. “I’m not perfect, and I would never claim to be. I made mistakes in our relationship, but in the end, all I know is that I’m glad that we ended things before we got married. I believe strongly—if at all possible—marriage is for life, and I’m not sure the two of us really knew what we were getting into. I would have hated for things to have fallen apart later, especially if children had been involved.”
“Is she the reason you never married?” The question was out before she had a chance to think about it.
Caden just shrugged. “I’ve never been opposed to marriage, but I work a lot of hours on the ranch, which makes it hard to meet new people.”
“I’m just surprised.”
He shot her a smile. “Because I’m such a great catch?”
“Yes, actually. You’re handsome, and you can be somewhat charming when you try.”
This time he laughed. “Somewhat?”
She felt her insides flip. Was he flirting with her? “I do have to give you credit for saving my life twice. Though, to be honest, I’m still hoping for a third time. Still no brilliant ideas for getting us out of here?”
“No, and you ask too many questions.”
“It’s my job.” She laughed, glad he seemed to finally be relaxing. “Plus, I’ve learned that you have to find time for relationships. If you’re not proactive, it won’t happen.”
He caught her gaze. “Is that why you’re still single?”
“Touché.”
“I didn’t mean it that way, but you did say you’d come close to getting married. Sometimes staying busy becomes a way to cope with that loss.”
“I admit I stay too busy. It’s easy to get through another day, then before you know it another week is gone. And then there’s Seth. My ex. He lied to me about some pretty significant things. He left me with no desire to ever feel that vulnerable again. And now it…it’s hard to take that first step again.”
And from what she knew about Caden she was pretty sure she wasn’t the only one.
“I was recently told by my brother,” he said, “that I’m not one to give out relationship advice. I’ve tried dating some, but I always end up walking away for one reason or the other. Maybe my brother’s right. I’m pretty sure that Cammie affected me more than I realize.”
“Trust doesn’t always come easy,” she said, “especially after a relationship that’s gone s
our.”
“True.” He looked down at his tiles again. “I guess I’m just looking for someone who loves me as much as I love her.”
“She’s out there.”
“I’d like to think so.”
“So you are a bit of a romantic at heart.”
He let out a low chuckle. “Sorry, but that’s not something I’ll ever admit.”
“I don’t know. Girls like guys who are romantics.”
For a moment, she wished she could take back her words. She didn’t like him. At least not in that way. Clearly, the stress of the situation was playing with her mind. She’d let the ridiculous situation they were in make him into some kind of hero. She’d meant what she’d said about not ever wanting to feel vulnerable again like she had when Seth left her. When she’d found out the truth about him.
Except Caden had been her hero. He’d already saved her life more than once and she was trusting him to once again get her out of here alive. But that didn’t mean it was personal for her…or for him, for that matter. They were simply two people who had been thrown together in a terrifying life-and-death situation. When this was over, she would owe him her gratitude, but nothing more.
She focused on the board that they’d forgotten about.
“I appreciate your talking to me,” she said. “I know that what really happened between you and Cammie that day is none of my business.”
“You’re right.” He put down a new word and smiled at her. “Sappy for seven points.”
“Wait a minute… I thought you weren’t a romantic.”
“Very funny.”
She grabbed her tiles and put down another word. “Seal.”
Caden glanced at the door. “That’s it.”
“What’s it?”
“Seal.”
“A cute furry animal that lives in the water?”
“No.” He caught her gaze. “I think I just discovered a way out of here.”
Caden walked back to the wall around the door and stood in front of it. Gwen’s questions had led him to a place he’d rather forget, but he couldn’t think about that right now. He’d missed something. He knew enough about these structures to know that there had to be a way out from the inside, and yet while he’d searched extensively, he still hadn’t found one. At least he hadn’t found anything obvious. But that didn’t mean it wasn’t here. Because what if this safe room had never been intended to simply keep bad guys out? What if whoever owned it had another purpose in mind?