I’ve drawn Emmett Ford into my lungs, and he’s been pumped into every part of me, including my writing. I now feel qualified to communicate this sacred revelation: the fear of falling in love with someone is insignificant compared to the joy of letting yourself fall in love with someone who pushes you to become more of who you are and calls you “baby.”
That is what I have ultimately learned in Professor Ford’s class.
In this way, I am willing to always be his student.
34
EMMETT
This time yesterday, I thought Fiona was in California and I didn’t know when I’d see her again. Today, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to go more than a day without seeing her and I think I want to live here with her all the time. Not now but someday. All of the feelings I’ve been holding back since I met her seem to be flooding in to fill the void that was my cold, dead heart.
We’ve thoroughly explored every inch of each other’s bodies. I woke up in bed, with her in my arms. I didn’t have to wonder if she’d walk into the steam shower with me this morning because she asked if we could shower together, and then she did the thing that most men fantasize about having a woman do to them in a shower. We’ve watched Frozen while eating store-bought pie for breakfast. She didn’t have hers a la mode due to her mild lactose intolerance. I wanted to go buy her some kind of bullshit nondairy ice cream, but she didn’t want me to leave, and we didn’t want to risk being seen together by Beowulf.
We aren’t exactly on the run like Jack and Catalina, but we’re kind of in hiding. This adds an extra sense of urgency and a layer of intimacy that I could only imagine when I was writing the chapters in my book. The other thing that adds a sense of urgency and intimacy—not wearing pants. We’re both wearing sweatshirts, underwear, and thick socks. Ignoring the whole professor-student thing, this is about as ideal a situation as I could dream up for myself.
I’m sitting in an armchair in the living room, reading an old Robert Ludlum hardcover. Fiona is sitting curled up on the floor, between my legs, reading what I have so far of The Departure on my iPad. She’s been so quiet, and I’ve never been so nervous while someone reads my work before. I keep glancing down to see what page she’s on. Other than that, it’s very relaxing.
Okay, it’s relaxing aside from the fact that there’s a four-foot metal cock staring at me from ten feet away. But I’ve gotten used to him. I just can’t help but feel like he was judging me while I was fucking Fiona on the sofa last night.
I’ve got sandalwood incense burning on the coffee table, and one of the patio doors is open a crack. It’s cold out, but the clean, fresh air is both bracing and soothing. And I’m struck by that memory of being here, years ago. The same memory that came to me the night I met Fiona, because of her scent. The lavender isn’t blooming in the backyard, but this beautiful young woman between my legs is in full bloom and fragrant as springtime. That longing I’d had back then, when I was here all alone, for some faceless woman to join me in the quiet moments. The woman now has a face—an amazing one—and the quiet moment is now.
She inhales sharply and then says, “I can’t believe she just walks off with the red-haired man at the Whispering Gallery!”
“Is it not believable?”
She wriggles around to face me, places the iPad on the floor, and snakes her arms around the backs of my knees. “It’s totally believable the way you wrote it. I just can’t believe I didn’t see it coming. That he was her ex-husband.”
“But you buy that he is?”
“Yes! I just—how did I not see that coming? I guess I was so wrapped up in the love story between Jack and Catalina that I didn’t think of it.”
“She’s a good love interest for him, huh?”
“Very. And he’s so romantic. It’s so unexpected.”
“Yes. It’s kind of surprising to me too.”
“What was the thing she was going to say to him? About when she first met him?”
“You’ll just have to wait and see.”
She wrinkles her nose, annoyed with me. Then she sits up on her knees, slides her arms up the sides of my legs, and presses herself against the chair, closer to me. “I love it, Emmett. It’s really good, and I can’t wait to find out what happens next.”
“Thank you.” I put my book aside, lean forward to kiss her.
She climbs up onto my lap, straddling me. “Catalina isn’t exactly me though…”
I wrap my arms around her waist. “No. I don’t want to share you with Jack Irons. But you’re still the inspiration. I’m not William Dexter either.”
“No. But you’re still the inspiration.”
“It’s interesting how that works, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Very.”
I bury my face into her chest, let my fingers casually roam beneath her sweatshirt. It is sort of alarming how comfortable we are with each other already. My fingers must be a little cold because she shivers and pulls away from me, almost imperceptibly.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Something else, you mean?”
She nods, rests her arms on my shoulders. “Did Sophie used to come here? To your cabin?”
I wait for the familiar clenching of insides whenever someone mentions her name, but it doesn’t come. “No. I bought this place after I’d been in New York for a few years. Once I was confident that I was going to remain a millionaire.”
“A millionaire, huh?”
“Fuck yeah, I’m a millionaire. You impressed?”
“Obviously. I’m a gold digger, so this is my favorite thing about you.”
“Well, I can see why. I mean, I could literally buy you anything you need. It’s hot.”
“So hot.”
“What do you need?”
She wrinkles her nose again, blushing. “I can’t even joke about that. I don’t want a sugar daddy.”
“Well, that’s too bad. Because I already bought you a few things. They’re back at my apartment.”
“You did?”
“Yeah. Christmas presents.”
She pouts. Her lower lip quivers. “You did? You got me Christmas presents?”
I nod. “I was going to have them delivered to you, but then you said you didn’t want to see me, so…”
“Aww. Emmett. I didn’t get you anything.”
“That’s okay. You were mad at me.”
“What’d you get me?”
“Just little things. A bunch of pens and notebooks.”
She claps her hands together and bounces up and down a little, which is troubling due to the position she’s in on my lap. “That is so sweet! That is the best thing you could get me!”
“And a MacBook. And a few bras. And some really nice panties from a French store. And a corset.”
Her jaw drops. “Are you kidding?”
I shake my head.
“You got me a MacBook?”
“Just a thirteen-inch one.”
“Emmett.”
“What? You need a new one.”
“I’ve been saving up for one.”
“Yeah, well. You have tuition to pay off. It’s not a big deal. I mean, don’t tell anyone I gave it to you. Say it’s from your parents.”
She’s quiet for a moment.
I shouldn’t have brought up the fact that it has to be kept a secret. Because everything about us has to be kept a secret for now. I didn’t want to bring up the world outside this bubble yet. I touch her face. “Hey. It made me happy to get those things for you. I want you to have them.”
She nods and smiles, and we’re back in the bubble again. Just as I’m leaning in to kiss her, she climbs off me and skips over to the rooster. “Well, if you got me a thirteen-inch MacBook, then I’m giving you a four-foot cock.” She picks up Goliath then puts him back down again, goes over to the door to step into her shoes, and jogs over to pick him up again. She has so much energy, it’s exhausting to watch. “I was looking at your backyard, and I was thinking it needs a little some
thing!” She goes over to the patio door that’s open a crack and slides it open more with one foot.
“Hey, don’t go out like that. You don’t have pants on.”
“No one will see!” She carries the damn thing out to the patch of lawn in front of the pool.
I get up to go to the door. “It’s cold outside! Get back in here!” Now I feel like an old man yelling at a neighborhood kid.
She just laughs at me. She looks so fucking cute and hot, even when she’s in a sweatshirt and underwear and waterproof ankle boots. She carefully places the metal cock down a few feet away from a lawn chair and angles him just so. I have to admit, he does look good there. His colors match the lawn furniture. She holds her arms out, smiling wide. “Right?”
“Right. Come back inside.”
She gives the cock a gentle kiss on the head—which does not sound right—smirks at me and walks very slowly back to the house.
Once she reaches the covered part of the deck, I go out, pick her up, and carry her inside. She laughs and squeals. I slide the door shut all the way with my foot because it’s going to get loud in here and I don’t want Goliath to hear us.
“When I say come inside, you come inside, young lady.” When I put her down, I give her a little smack on the ass.
Her eyes widen and her whole face lights up, but she tries so hard not to smile at me. She calmly removes her shoes and says, “I shall re-enter the manor when I am good and ready, my lord.”
“You shall sit yourself back down upon my lap this instant, Lady Ford.” I don’t even think about how I just implied that she’s my wife as I drag her over to the armchair and pull her down to my lap.
We frantically remove each other’s sweatshirts. She bears down on me, rocks back and forth as I kiss her neck. Her skin isn’t as cold as I thought it would be, probably because she’s made of hawt.
“Thank you for the rooster. Are you sure you want to leave him here? What about the cock pics?”
“I think my mom will understand…” She stands up to remove her panties, and I lift up my ass so she can pull off my boxers. “I mean, it’s only fair. Since your cock is mine now.” She straddles me again, positioning herself.
“I can’t believe you said it.”
“Bad dialogue?”
“The worst.”
“It’s true though. It’s one true sentence.” She slowly lowers herself down on me.
“It’s the truest sentence I know.”
35
FIONA
“Get closer to the cock. Why are you being so shy with him all of a sudden?”
“I don’t know! It feels weird now that I’ve given him to you.”
Emmett is holding up my phone, trying to get a shot of me with Goliath so I can send it to my mom. “Let’s not think of it as you giving him to me. He’s staying here at the cabin for now. You can come visit him anytime, and if you want him back you can have him.”
I don’t know how Emmett went from being the guy who said all the wrong things to the guy who says everything I need to hear, but I hope he doesn’t change back again once we leave Cold Spring. I have to get to Manhattan for the dinner shift, and I don’t want to leave this place. He told me to try to get someone to cover for me so we can stay here through New Year’s Day, but I need to make the money. I can’t actually let him give me cash for next month’s rent like he offered to. That would really be crossing a line.
I get closer to Goliath and wrap my arms around him. He’s a lot less fun to kiss than Emmett is, but I strike a pose and kiss him anyway. Hopefully Sissy won’t ask where I am and who took the picture of me when I send it to her because I don’t think either of us are ready to explain things to our parents yet.
“Beautiful,” he says. “You guys make a cute couple.”
Not as cute as us though, is what I’m thinking.
“Not as cute as us though,” he says.
I can’t believe he said that. I take a run at him and leap into his arms, kissing him all over his stupidly handsome face. He thinks we’re a couple!
I don’t even know how I’m going to be able to write sentences in my romance novel that aren’t corny anymore. Because I feel as though my heart has wings. And I see heaven in his eyes. It’s as if we’re living in a dream, and I don’t ever want to wake up. I want to stand with him on a mountain and bathe with him in the sea. My head is spinning, and I’m dizzy with love for this man. I would give him everything that I am, always. He is my muse and the creator of this new woman that I’m becoming. And we’ve only just begun.
It really sucks that I’m at the part in You Can Viscount on Me that’s supposed to be the dark moment for William and Lucy. I might not be able to bring the angst. It truly sucks that I can’t stay here with Emmett though.
I’m the first to pull away. That’s how it’s been all day today. “I need to order a cab. How long does it take to get to the train station from here? Less than ten minutes, right?” I slide down the front of his amazing body, and we walk back inside.
“Just let me drive you home. You can slouch down in the back seat.”
“I don’t want to take any chances.” Now I’m the one who’s being cautious. I don’t think I’m being overly cautious, but Emmett doesn’t seem to be thinking about the consequences if we get caught anymore. I must have a magical and truly distracting vagina or something.
He goes all serious again all of a sudden. “Yeah. You’re right.”
Okay, maybe my vagina isn’t as spectacular as I thought it was.
He hands me my phone, and I send the cock pic to my mother without any explanation. Then I check around the house to make sure I haven’t left anything lying around, like my notebook or my panties. When I’m upstairs, my phone starts vibrating in my pocket. My mother is FaceTiming me. I have only heard from them sporadically since they left on their cruise, so I close the door to the master bedroom and accept the video call. Emmett is downstairs, so hopefully I can get this over with without him having to worry about me spilling the beans to my mom.
I can tell as soon as I see Sissy’s face that she’s not going to let me go until I’ve given her every detail of my whereabouts.
“Hey! You look great! Are you in your room?”
“Yes, the Wi-Fi signal is strong right now. Where are you and Goliath? Are you still at your writers’ retreat?”
“Sort of! How’s the cruise? I haven’t checked your Insta yet today.”
“So you’re with the other grad students?”
“Hmmm? Have you had any humpback whale sightings?”
“Funny you should mention humpbacks because I can see by your aura that you’ve been humping quite a bit recently.”
“Mother. Shhh.”
“Oh, is there someone else around? Do tell.”
“I can’t.”
“You can’t tell me?”
“Not yet. It’s complicated.”
The door creaks open, and I turn the phone away so my mother can’t see Emmett. He pokes his head in. I hold the phone to my chest and whisper, “It’s my mom. I’ll be out in a minute.”
He grins and walks in. Which is unexpected. And awesome.
My mom has continued to question me. I hold the phone in front of my face again. “Um. It’s all good. I just can’t explain right now.”
“Is your sex partner there right now?”
“Mother.”
“I’m right here, Mrs. Walker,” Emmett says. He comes over to stand behind me, resting his chin on my shoulder and waving to Sissy. “Pleasure to meet you. I’m Emmett.”
My mother runs her fingers through her hair. “Well, hello there, Emmett. Please call me Sissy. My goodness, you’ve finally upgraded from your usual shaggy boys, Fiona.”
“Mom,” I mutter.
Emmett runs his fingers through his hair too. “I am a bit shaggier than usual, actually.”
I can feel his stubbly cheek rubbing against mine and nearly drop the phone because I’m swooning so hard.
&n
bsp; “Well, you are a very handsome man, Emmett. Are you a grad student?”
“Uhh, no. He’s actually a very successful author, and this isn’t a thing that we can openly discuss, so…”
“That may be true, but I’m very fond of your daughter, Sissy.”
“Well, I don’t know how long this has been going on, but I can just sense how nourishing you’ve been for Fiona’s yoni.”
“Oh my God. Mom!”
“I’ve certainly done my best to be a positive influence on every part of her. That one in particular.”
Welp. If Emmett ever wants to ask my mom for my hand in marriage, that pretty much sealed the deal right there.
“Who’s nourishing whose yoni?” My dad wanders into frame.
Kill me now.
“Emmett, sir. How do you do. How’s the cruise?”
“Hello, Emmett. I’m Rick. Lemme tell you something. They have people on this cruise called serenity stewards. I’ve started calling Sissy my serenity stewardess, because that’s what she’s been for me. Except when she’s being a pain in the ass, which is half the time.”
“Well, you can imagine what a delight your father has been since he can’t smoke pot onboard this ship.”
“Don’t listen to her.” I can tell he gives my mother a pat on the butt. I usually try to block out that kind of thing, but she seems to like it too. “I take my CBD oil, and it’s cool.” My dad squints at the screen. “Move the camera so I can see all of your man’s face.”
I move the phone so that Emmett’s face is squarely in the FaceTime window.
Emmett nods at him. “Hello again.”
“Are you Emmett Ford?”
“I am indeed.”
“Holy shit. I’ve read all the Jack Irons books. When’s the next one out?”
“Wait, what? I’ve never seen you read those books.”
“I read them on my Kindle so I don’t have to catch any flak from you and your mom. These ladies and their romance novels, am I right?”
The Love Interest Page 18