by Zoey Draven
She has sacrificed much for me, I reminded myself, looking into her grey eyes, almost identical to my own. And I would always love her, though sometimes she seemed like a stranger to me.
Let it go. Bury the emotions deep, I thought to myself. Just as she’d taught me.
“Lysi, lomma,” I responded, brushing my lips across her cheek. “Let us not argue this night.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
It was eleven days before Seerin returned.
Eleven long days and even longer nights.
I was in Avuli’s voliki, though our work had slowly dried up after the frost feast. Still, I liked to spend time with her and she seemed happy for the company.
Right then, she was playing a game involving rocks with Arlah, rolling them across the rugs from the farthest distance the voliki allowed, trying to hit a smaller pebble, which had landed just next to the roaring fire basin.
The past eleven days had brought the snow and throughout most of the days, the horde remained in the safe and warm shelter of their homes. Even at night, it was too cold for me to brave the training grounds. It was the kind of cold that froze one’s bones, the kind of cold that hurt. Besides, being at the training grounds only reminded me of the pujerak’s threats and the memory still made anger ignite in my belly.
I watched from my cushion, a fur wrapped tightly around my shoulders, as Arlah tossed his rock, which landed close to my foot. Laughing, I watched as he then tried to distract his mother as she took her aim.
Odrii ducked into the tent just then. Slowly, over the course of the last week, he’d warmed to me. He’d even apologized one morning when I’d gone into the weapons tent and saw him waiting there beside my mitri, saying that he’d been acting like a sulking fool.
There’d been nothing to forgive. I’d just been happy that most of the uncomfortable tension between us had lifted.
Odrii looked at me then, pausing at the threshold of the entrance.
“In, in!” Avuli said, frowning at her brother. “You are letting all the heat out.”
“Yes!” Arlah cried, one of the only universal language words he spoke with complete confidence. The young boy used it often.
Arlah giggled as Odrii stomped in, shaking out his boots, which were covered in white, powdery snow.
“I thought you would want to know,” he began, looking at me. “The Vorakkar returned just now.”
For a moment, I simply stared at him. Then my heart skipped about four beats as excitement and profound relief burst in my chest.
“And he’s alright?” I asked, pushing up quickly to stand, already reaching for my boots.
Odrii took my shoulders and stilled my hurried movements.
“Lysi,” he affirmed. “However, he just went in with his council. You cannot see him just yet.”
Disappointment made my shoulders sag, but I nodded. Of course, he would need to meet with his council first, after his meeting with the Dothikkar.
“That is good news, brother,” Avuli chimed in. “At least he made it home safe. We were all worried about the terrible turn in weather.”
It was something I’d realized over the last couple weeks…that the members of Rath Tuviri truly cared for their Vorakkar. Avuli had told me she’d caught snippets of conversation all over the encampment about when he would return and that they wished it was soon. That the bikku worried they did not pack him enough rations for his trip and worried how his pyroki would fare in the snow. Another seamstress in the horde had apparently fretted that she should have made him another pelt for his long journey.
Seerin was a good male. A good leader to his horde. They all saw what I saw in him.
Now that I knew he had returned, however, the afternoon and early evening of that day passed even more slowly than usual. My heart felt like it hadn’t slowed down once and even Arlah’s made-up games couldn’t keep me distracted for very long.
Finally, Avuli said, “Go, Nelle. Go wait for him. I am sure he will finish with the council soon. It’s dark already.”
I nodded, already pulling on my boots and my pelt. Avuli had made me a shawl, which covered the lower part of my face, keeping my cheeks from stinging.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” I told her and Odrii before rustling Arlah’s lengthening hair. He squeezed my hand, holding it for as long as possible, not wanting me to go. He never liked it when I left for the day. Finally, Avuli drew him away and I left with one last wave.
I hurried to Seerin’s voliki, past my own and up the short incline. The cold seemed to suck all the air from my lungs and I hated that Seerin had to travel through it.
When I stepped inside his tent, I saw that someone had already started his fire and delivered a heaping assortment of dried meats, dried fruits, rich, fatty broth, and a large loaf of kuveri, along with a generous goblet of wine. His bath was ready in its usual corner.
My skin tingled as I unwrapped my shawl and then shrugged out of my pelt. Toeing off my boots, I went to stand near the fire, warming my fingers as I waited. I’d snuck into Seerin’s voliki on numerous occasions during his absence, late at night as the horde slept. A few times, I’d even slept in his furs because they still smelled like him and it helped comfort me.
Though, lying in his furs held its own array of problems. Whenever I had, I’d been plagued with memories of the last time we’d been in his bed together, of possessive kisses and lingering touches, of heat and sex and the wicked words he’d growled into my flesh as he’d made me his.
The heavy flaps to his voliki pushed inward, a whistling wind sneaking inside, making the fire flicker.
My breath hitched as my demon king came inside. And I felt as though my heart would beat its way from my chest as his eyes connected with mine.
He dropped a fur-wrapped bundle by the entrance and then he was striding towards me.
His black pelt was icy cold but I didn’t care. I reached for him as he reached for me. Then his lips were on mine and he ate at my mouth hungrily, consuming me as his arms wrapped tight around my body and mine pressed against his chest.
Somehow, I’d forgotten how big he was, how massive. When I’d first seen him, I’d thought of him as a wall. A wall of solid strength. Back then, that power had frightened me.
But now, I’d never felt safer or more protected than in his arms. Now I knew why the symbol of his horde was a shield.
“Need you now, rei thissie,” he rasped against me, his hands already going to my thick tunic.
I sucked in a sharp breath at his dark voice, my toes curling into the rugs beneath us.
I’d missed him. So incredibly much. Everything about him.
“Yes,” I whispered, lifting my arms so he could rip my tunic from my body. Desire and need heated my blood as my breasts sprang free.
I moaned when he ducked his head and his hot tongue immediately sought my pebbled nipples.
But I didn’t want to waste time. As he sucked and teased my sensitive breasts, I untied his pelt and pushed it from his wide shoulders, smoothing my hands over the cords of muscles lining his arms.
Between us, my fingers unlaced his pants before immediately delving inside.
A rough groan tore from his throat when I wrapped my hand around his cock, remembering how much he’d liked it when I’d stroked him in the bath.
“Vok,” he whispered, pulsing hard and hot in my hand. His hands came to my pants, unlaced the knots, and when I kicked them off, I was completely naked under his gaze except for the feathers that hung between my breasts.
He looked over me with a half-lidded gaze, his hands tracing the curves of my body. I’d gained even more weight since he’d last seen me, since his hands had last been on me. My hips were softened, my breasts and thighs fuller. Considering how thin I’d been when he’d first brought me to his horde, I felt like a completely different woman. I looked like a completely different woman.
I ran my thumb over the slick, slippery head of his cock, making him jolt.
“Does that feel
good?” I murmured to him, barely concealing my small, teasing smile. A part of me still couldn’t believe he was here, that he’d finally returned.
His eyes narrowed and he finished undressing quickly, until he was as naked as I was.
He licked his lips, taking my hands from his cock as he promised, “I will show you how good it feels.”
Our words were so similar to the night when he’d pushed me away—the night I’d bathed him. He knew it and I knew it. It was like we were rewriting the events of that night.
I gasped as he pushed me down onto the rugs, though we weren’t far from the bed. I looked up at him with wide eyes as he kneeled, as he reached out and flipped me over until I was on all fours in front of him, on my hands and knees.
Looking over my shoulder, I licked my suddenly dry lips. He’d never taken me like this before but I found the position curiously erotic. My legs squeezed together, more than ready for him.
Then his eyes shifted over me. His gaze caught on my back and his expression changed as he brushed my long hair to the side.
His jaw ticked as he looked at the three scars across my back. From the whip. He traced one, his touch starting at the top of my shoulder, going diagonally across my spine, ending at my hip.
I looked at him, wondering what he was thinking. I knew he hated seeing them. He’d never said so, but I could feel his sudden tension.
My brow furrowed, tears welling surprisingly quickly in my eyes, when he leaned over and kissed the scars, brushing his lips over my flesh. Softly, gently, he kissed every last inch of the old wounds I’d received on his order. And I knew what his kiss meant. What it was.
It was an apology. It was his regret, his guilt.
I’d already told him that I didn’t hold these scars against him. I’d let that go, even when I’d still been healing. He’d been bound in his duty as I’d been bound by his race’s laws.
But my demon king had obviously still carried this with him and it was pouring from him now, all over my scarred flesh.
“Seerin,” I choked out.
I thought that I loved him. I thought that was what this was, what it was always going to be, from the first moment I felt him taking my soul. Me…a human who didn’t know the first thing about love, who found herself in love with a powerful, beautiful horde king of Dakkar. It was almost laughable, but I didn’t care how strange it seemed.
“Come here,” I whispered, not trusting my voice. I felt exposed and vulnerable. Yet I felt completely safe. It was such an odd combination of emotions.
He leaned over me and I craned my neck.
Capturing his lips in a slow, soft kiss, I whispered, “Enough. Enough now.”
When he pulled away, his eyes flickered between my own. He knew what I was telling him. That the past was behind us. That how we’d come to find one another was behind us. I’d forgiven him a long time ago.
His nod was slight, but I knew he understood. He captured my lips one last time and then drew back.
“Oh,” I breathed when I felt his hand brush underneath me, when I felt it brush against my swollen clitoris. Desire returned to me, even stronger than it’d been before, fueled, not extinguished, by what just happened.
He stroked between my thighs until I was rocking against his hand, my breasts swaying under me, Blue’s feathers drifting across the rug.
“Seerin,” I whispered, looking over my shoulder at him. “Please!”
With a growl at my begging, he positioned his throbbing cock at my entrance.
“Lysi?” he rumbled.
Frantically, I rocked my hips back and he slid inside a couple inches. His hiss filled the voliki.
Then his hands were anchoring my hips, gripping them until I couldn’t move.
With one powerful thrust, he slid all the way inside and held there. My head lolled, my mouth dropping, and my eyes fluttering shut. There was only a brief pinch of pain this time, which quickly faded.
“I cannot wait any longer,” he growled. “Need you now.”
At his words, he pulled out from my body before slamming his hips into me again.
“Ahhh,” I cried out. “Oh yes, Seerin!”
He didn’t stop. He continued to pound and thrust and grind into my sex until the wicked sounds of mating filled the voliki. Until everything fell away. Until it was just him, me. Until it was just us.
Rough grunts and purring groans reached my ears and my fingernails curled into the plush rugs underneath me, my breasts bobbing forcefully with every teeth-chattering thrust.
Just when I thought I was hanging on the edge of orgasm, Seerin’s hand wrapped around my throat.
I gasped in surprise as he pulled me up until we were both kneeling, as he continued to pound into me from behind. Impossibly, his cock seemed to slide even deeper. My back met the hardened plane of his chest as he kept his grip around my neck. His other hand went between my legs, pressing against my aching clitoris, rolling it maddeningly slowly, a juxtaposition to his almost frenzied, desperate thrusts from behind.
His hand around my throat was possessive. It wasn’t frightening. It was…
It was a claim, I realized. The claim of my demon king.
Seerin turned my neck until he could kiss me and I met his kiss with a claim that was all my own. His dark growl threaded down my throat, sizzling straight for where we were joined, and I gasped.
The orgasm that hit me was almost violent. It arched my spine and made my whole body freeze.
Seerin felt me squeezing around his cock. He snarled at the sensation, breaking our kiss.
“Look at me while you come, rei thissie,” he ordered, his voice nothing more than a guttural purr.
I couldn’t look away from him even if I tried. His grey eyes latched onto mine. As unfathomable pleasure racked my body, as I felt his pace quicken, I never looked away.
It was then that I felt him take the very last part of me. The last lingering bit of my soul that I’d perhaps tried to keep, in fear that letting it go would change me forever.
And it did. It would. I knew that as certainly as I knew that I loved this demon. My demon.
Seerin’s brow furrowed at whatever he saw in my gaze and then I felt his cock jerk and grow inside me.
I drew in a ragged breath as I felt his seed burst from him, as it lashed against my fluttering walls and pumped deep into me, hot and so right.
With a groan, he shuddered against me, his hand loosening on my throat. We both slid forward, tumbling together on the rugs of his voliki.
“I do not think I will ever get enough of you, Nelle,” he groaned, his breathing ragged and rough.
He sounded almost fearful of that.
But like I’d told him on the night of the frost feast…I wasn’t afraid.
Chapter Thirty-Three
“Your skin is dry here,” I observed, looking at the ball of Seerin’s shoulder. “And here,” I murmured, running my palm down his side, underneath the water of the bath.
Water trickled as I shifted and he groaned when his cock rubbed between my legs. We were in the bathing tub and I was straddling his hips, leaning against his chest. We’d already washed one another and I discovered that Seerin washing my hair, those long fingers scraping at my scalp, felt like heaven. And right then, I’d never felt warmer or happier or more protected in my entire life.
“Because my alukkiri left me,” he murmured, tilting my face up, his eyes studying my features.
“Because you were being stubborn,” I replied, remembering that night well, quirking a brow.
He grunted, hard-headed male that he was.
I hid my smile when I said, “But we did have an agreement and I didn’t hold up my end of it.”
“Nik,” he murmured gravely, as if this was the most serious matter we’d ever discussed. “You did not, thissie.”
“I suppose, to make up for it,” I began, “I can be your alukkiri for the rest of the season?”
His purr told me just how much he liked that idea. “Lysi
?”
“Yes.”
“And I can be yours, thissie,” he growled, his hands running up from my hips, cupping my breasts, his thumbs rubbing over my nipples.
My laugh sounded slightly breathless and died completely when he leaned in to nibble at the column of my throat. “Seerin.”
“Mmm?”
“You still haven’t told me about Dothik,” I reminded him before he decided to distract me. Again. We’d taken a break from our lovemaking to wash, but it had been hours since Seerin arrived back at the tent and he’d managed to avoid every single one of my questions about his journey.
He sighed and leaned back. “I am happy and relieved to be back at my horde, Nelle. That is all.”
“It went that poorly?” I chanced.
His lips pressed together. “There were many meetings with the Dothikkar and the other Vorakkars. None of them ended well. We will reconvene after the thaw comes.”
“You have to go back so soon?” I asked, frowning. The thaw wouldn’t happen for another couple months, but it still seemed too soon.
“Lysi.”
“And what of your mother?” I asked after a brief pause. “Did you see her?”
He inclined his head, but his eyes flickered slightly. His hands roamed down my body again and I knew what he was doing…he was trying to distract me. I caught his wrists below the water when he reached between my thighs.
Seerin made a sharp exhale. I remembered what his pujerak had told me…that Seerin’s mother was calculating and ruthless. I wondered if his words painted her accurately, but asking him would have revealed that his pujerak had spoken to me. And, for some reason, I didn’t want Seerin to know about that night. I had a feeling it would only anger him.
“Lysi, I saw her the first night and again the second night,” he said.
“How is she?” I asked softly.
“She is how she always is,” he answered, but his words didn’t satisfy me. They told me nothing.
“And how’s that?”
His eyes came to mine. “She is the Dothikkar’s favored concubine. Apart from when he needs her, she is free to do what she wishes. She is dressed in the finest clothes, adorned with the finest jewels, and is satisfied with her position in his court. To my mother, status is important. Hers is as high as it could be.”