The Core of the Sun

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The Core of the Sun Page 4

by Johanna Sinisalo


  I’m sorry I couldn’t give that to you.

  Your sister,

  Vanna (Vera)

  “LITTLE REDIANNA”

  Eloi Girls’ Best-Loved Stories

  National Publishing (1951)

  Once upon a time there was a very pretty, very good little girl who was always obedient and kind to everyone. She liked pretty clothes, and she especially liked the color red. That’s why everyone called her Little Redianna.

  One day Little Redianna’s mother asked her to bring some medicine to her grandmother, who was sick. So Little Redianna put the medicine into her basket and set off for her grandmother’s house. On the way there she met a wolf. The wolf told Little Redianna that she was the prettiest girl he had ever seen. He said he wanted her to be his wife.

  Little Redianna told the wolf she couldn’t marry him because she liked her grandmother very much and she wanted to bring her some medicine. Then she continued on her way. But the wolf found a quicker way to the house, and when he got there he ate her grandmother up. Then he put on her grandmother’s nightgown and lay down in the bed to wait for Little Redianna.

  When Little Redianna arrived at her grandmother’s house with the medicine, she noticed that her grandmother looked strange.

  “Grandmother, what big eyes you have,” Little Redianna said.

  “The better to see you with, my dear,” said the wolf.

  “Grandmother, what big ears you have,” Little Redianna said.

  “The better to hear you with, my dear,” said the wolf.

  “Grandmother, what big teeth you have,” Little Redianna said.

  “The better to gobble you up and make you a part of myself and keep you as my own for the rest of my life,” said the wolf.

  Then the wolf leaped out of the bed and threw off his wolf’s skin, and Little Redianna saw that he wasn’t a wolf at all but a handsome prince.

  “Because you didn’t obey me and agree to be my wife, and decided to bring medicine to your grandmother instead, I’m not going to marry you,” said the handsome prince, and he left Little Redianna at her grandmother’s house, and she never, ever got married.

  The End

  Dear Manna,

  It was inevitable that we would grow out of our games.

  You won’t remember this because you weren’t there. I was twelve and I was working in the garden on a hot day, wearing a bikini. I noticed Aulikki glancing now and then at my bikini bottoms and it was obvious that there was something she wanted to say.

  “Well, what is it?” I finally asked.

  “It’s, um . . . that.”

  I looked down at my crotch. Aulikki pointed at the little curls of blond pubic hair peeking out of my bikini. I thought it was interesting that it was curly when the hair on my head was naturally straight.

  “You have to shave,” Aulikki said.

  “Is there something wrong with hair?” I asked.

  I had seen Aulikki in the sauna, and she didn’t shave her own body hair. Aulikki looked uncomfortable and fumbled for words. She said we had to be careful in case someone dropped by on a hot day and noticed it.

  At first I didn’t understand, and then I did and rolled my eyes. It was another one of those eloi things that kept popping up more and more every year. This new rule about hair was inconsistent, though. I was supposed to let the hair on my head grow long so no one would mistake me for a morlock. And I was supposed to wear a bikini in the summer because elois liked to wear bikinis in the summer. So if the hair on my head was so sacred, why should the hair farther down have to be kept out of sight, particularly when I was supposed to wear clothes that were obviously going to show it?

  Then Aulikki suggested I shave my armpits as well, and I asked if I should shave off my eyebrows, too. I meant it as a joke, but Aulikki said that it might be a good idea to start plucking them now, and I should keep my leg hair under control, too.

  I marched inside to do some research. According to one book, a person’s individual smell was an important factor in mating. The hair in the armpits and on the groin traps special odors that exude their scent to those close by. This made shaving seem even more stupid than I’d thought. Why purposely destroy a physical characteristic specifically linked to the survival of the species?

  Judging by the pictures and the mascos I’d seen, they weren’t required to trim anything except their beards and the hair on their heads, and even that rule seemed to be loosely interpreted.

  Then it said that hair on the groin and armpits was a visible sign of sexual maturity. That in ancient human societies it may have helped to identify whether another individual was of mating age. If elois were required to shave off this identifying characteristic, did that mean that mascos actually wanted to mate with children?

  Another book said that armpit and pubic hair also had a health function. It protected the extremities from chafing during movement, provided cushioning, and promoted air circulation.

  But I was supposed to shave it off.

  There were many, many more bizarre aspects to the world than I could have imagined. I realized I’d been stupid. It wasn’t enough anymore to be a brave shepherd girl inside. My body was betraying me, turning me into a princess against my will.

  We both were going to become narrow-waisted, big-breasted, long-legged elois, but you were the only one who approached the change with curiosity and excitement. You started to talk more and more about entering the mating market and the debutante ball you would have when you turned fourteen.

  I was so jealous of you, Manna. You grew and developed such poise, like a young tree, but I was afraid and filled with angst about the unknown life ahead of me.

  Luckily, Aulikki saw that.

  Aulikki was already nearly eighty when I reached the age of coming out. Because of her age and lack of resources, she got permission to put off my debut for two years so the two of us could come on the market at the same time. That meant I could spend two more precious years at Neulapää.

  I never told you how important it’s been to my whole life to have a sister like you. I would never have learned how to behave, how to talk to strangers, if I didn’t have you.

  With eternal gratitude, your sister,

  Vanna (Vera)

  MODERN DICTIONARY ENTRY

  masco — A popular unofficial vernacular word for the majority of males. Used to distinguish these men from so-called minus men, a minority of men who, because of their limitations (such as chronic illness or serious physical deficiencies), are designated as outside the mating market.

  Dear Manna,

  Sometimes, for no reason, just to torture myself, I wonder when it was that things took a wrong turn. If I could turn back time, of course, our parents would never have died. But if I stick to things that I might have been able to influence, I would go back to the spring of 2011.

  I had reached the age of coming out, but my debut had been postponed, so there shouldn’t have been anything special about that year. The snow had melted; it was time to do the spring sowing, and a new farmhand had to be hired—an April like any other.

  Aulikki had asked us to get out some clean sheets for the bed in the barn. Remember how we went out to pick pussy willows from the side of the brook and put them in a vase on the little bedside table? That was your idea. It was exciting that we were going to have a stranger at the house again, and you and I were speculating about what kind of person the new farmhand would be. Would he be grumbly and untalkative, or would he make jokes all the time? Would he be athletic, always doing chin-ups on the birch tree in the yard, or studious, shutting himself up in his room with his textbooks after his day’s work was done? Would he like the food we made for him? Would he be as thoughtful as one farmhand we’d had, who would go fishing on his time off and bring Aulikki his catch to add to dinner?

  The new hand was seventeen and was studying food scie
nce. Aulikki showed him around Neulapää. He would be sleeping in the barn, washing up in the sauna, and eating his meals in the kitchen. Aulikki introduced us, too. We curtsied and said our names. He asked which one of us had put the pussy willows in his room. You giggled and blushed when I told him it was your idea.

  There was always a lot of work to do at Neulapää in spring and early summer. So we helped Aulikki as well as we could. She had to save her strength for instructing and supervising the farmhand; she couldn’t manage heavy physical labor anymore. Since I was already fourteen I took responsibility for the meals. Your cooking skills still needed a lot of work then, but you helped me peel the vegetables and you knew how to poke the potatoes to see if they were done and set the table and carry the food out. The farmhand couldn’t come into the house except at mealtimes, and even then he could come only into the kitchen, because you and I weren’t officially of mating age and any fraternizing that could be associated with mating was not allowed.

  But a smell like fresh-cut grass started to float around you nevertheless, growing stronger whenever you saw the farmhand. Your cheeks would flush, and you read your Femigirl magazine stories more and more greedily.

  I mentioned this to Aulikki. She sighed and said that every eloi starts practicing falling in love at some point before she reaches mating age, and that you were obviously directing these feelings at the farmhand. She also said—rather cruelly, I thought—that it was good that your feelings weren’t returned because every eloi has to start competing for mascos eventually, and it’s better that she have some experience with disappointment from the beginning. But maybe it would be best if you didn’t help with serving the meals anymore.

  You cried and threw a tantrum at that, but Aulikki wouldn’t budge.

  Do you remember that day?

  I brought the farmhand dinner by myself. He didn’t seem to notice that anything was different. He ate, thanked me, and left. I washed the dishes and went to my room. When I got to the doorway, I stopped.

  On the floor was one of my favorite books, Native Plants of the Nordic Countries. A wonderful picture book. It had been cut up with scissors. I burst into tears. My library was so small and pitiful; I couldn’t bear to lose even one of my books. I’d read through them all many times, but they still gave me a lot of happiness, and there wasn’t really any way to get anything new to read about subjects that interested me. Aulikki could order books by mail about plant care or sewing, of course—those were things appropriate to her life—but it would have been difficult to explain a sudden interest in natural science or history without arousing suspicion. She was a full citizen, so it wasn’t officially forbidden, but she thought you could never be too careful.

  I knew, of course, that you were the one who’d cut up my book. But I couldn’t understand why. I went to your room. You weren’t there, but there were scraps of paper and scissors and pages of the book on your desk. Next to them was a sheet of paper with a clumsy drawing of a bride and groom. The bouquet in the bride’s hands was a clump of plants cut from the book and glued to the paper. You’d chosen wild roses, twinflowers, lilies of the valley, and several other lovely spring flowers. Under the bride you’d written “Manna” and underneath the groom it said “Jare.”

  I left your room. Maybe you remember that I never mentioned that book, or your picture. I didn’t blame you. I understand why you did it.

  Sometimes I wish I could find you just so Jare could tell you what really happened. Maybe you would believe him.

  I hope you aren’t really mad at me.

  Missing you, your sister,

  Vanna (Vera)

  JARE REMEMBERS

  July 2011

  I cut my hand making stakes for the peas. The cut wasn’t that deep and I hoped it wasn’t serious, but it bled like hell, dripping on my clothes and onto the ground. I couldn’t keep working until I’d put a bandage on it. I didn’t have a first aid kit, just some bath things in the sauna. I took off my shirt, found a clean spot on it and wrapped it around my hand to stop the bleeding, then ran over to the main house. I knocked on the living room door, hoping the old woman would be there—and be awake, since she was often napping. There was no answer, so I opened the door a crack and peeked into the room. I grimaced; the blood was already soaking through the shirt. I had to find a bathroom and see if there was something I could use there, maybe a towel I could borrow to use as a bandage—it was an emergency, after all. I pushed open the first door I came to.

  The older eloi, Vanna, was sitting in the room alone. It seemed to be her room. There was a bed and a young eloi’s clothes—but also a pile of books on the table and on a small shelf on the wall. Vanna looked up and saw me and leaped to her feet, a book falling from her hand. Seeing any kind of book in an eloi’s hands was unusual, but this book was titled Astronomy and the World Today. She quickly tried to kick it under the chair where I couldn’t see it.

  An eloi might flip through a book for fun, of course, especially if it has pretty pictures in it. But that didn’t seem to be the case here, and the strange part was that she was so afraid that I would see what she was reading. If she had just been innocently looking at the book out of curiosity she wouldn’t have panicked.

  And then her whole demeanor changed. Her sharp gaze dropped and turned soft and hazy, and she thrust out her breasts, cocked her hips, raised her hand to her chin as if she were embarrassed, her lower lip trying for a sweet little droop. She batted her thick eyelashes. “Oh! You can’t come in here. I’ll get my grandmother,” she cooed.

  Then she noticed the bloody shirt wrapped around my hand and suddenly her eloi mannerisms disappeared again. Her eyes brightened, her posture straightened, the submissive simper went out of her voice. “Yikes. We’ve gotta do something about that.” She came to the door, took hold of my arm and led me through the living room to the other side of the house. We went through a small passage to the bathroom. She turned on the light, told me to sit on the toilet, and held my hand in the air as she rummaged in the medicine cabinet. She found a bottle of disinfectant and a bag of cotton balls, told me to unwrap the shirt from the cut, and quickly washed the wound. She got out gauze and a roll of bandage tape, deftly wrapped my hand, and secured the bandage with a few strips of the tape. “I’m sure it won’t bleed for very long. Do you think you can change the bandage every day if I give you these, or would you rather come to the house and have one of us help you?”

  I didn’t answer.

  Her eyelashes started to flutter again, her lower lip thrust out.

  I touched her hand. “Stop that.”

  She pulled her hand away. “Now, now, young man,” she cooed, looking up at me with her head cocked to one side. “Just because I was a good girl and fixed up your boo-boo doesn’t mean you can start getting fresh.”

  I touched her hand again briefly to make her look at me. “It’s quite obvious you’re not an eloi, or at least not an ordinary eloi, even if you do look like one. But if you want to keep it secret that you’re a . . .”

  “Morlock.” Her voice had lost all its flirty chirpiness. The word fell between us cold as a stone.

  “Right. I won’t tell anyone. It’s none of my business. Or anybody else’s business. What would I gain from it? You and your family haven’t done anything to me.”

  Vanna bit her lower lip.

  “I wonder what Aulikki has to say about it.”

  The next moment we were standing in front of the old woman, who had just awakened from her nap. Vanna explained in a few quick sentences what had happened.

  I watched their conversation with a fearful amazement. It was like hearing two parrots that I’d thought could only repeat the phrases their master taught them suddenly start exchanging observations on the theory of relativity.

  “Should we kill him?” Vanna asked, in the same tone she might have used to discuss changing the drapes.

  When the old
woman pursed her lips, apparently giving this idea serious consideration, I turned cold. “Hmm. I don’t know. What do you think?” she said, and looked me straight in the eye, and it was crystal clear to me that even though I was talking to an old woman and a half-grown . . . something . . . I had reason to fear. They had a lot to lose, and the two of them allied was chilling.

  I spread my arms. “I have no way to prove I won’t turn you in, but if I did I would lose a good summer job reference. The reward for reporting gender fraud wouldn’t be enough to make up for that.”

  They looked at each other, the understanding flying like sparks between them.

  “It’s true that he wouldn’t gain anything by it,” Aulikki said. I was admiring her more every moment, the way she didn’t seem to take any notice of the fact that the topic of discussion was standing half a meter away, shifting from foot to foot. “And if he tried, you’re so good at acting like an eloi that he’d be a laughingstock and get a fine for wasting the authorities’ time. We could claim that he had a crush on you and made the story up when he couldn’t get anywhere with you.”

  Vanna nodded. “On the other hand, what if he keeps it a secret and I get caught later on? Will he get in trouble? Will they think he was in on it?”

  “No, not if he claims he didn’t notice anything unusual about you.”

  As I watched and listened to their conversation, I realized for the first time what it’s like to have people talking about you, talking over you, past you. Deciding your fate, chattering about this and that—could he be useful somehow or should we dispose of him?

  I thought through my options. Should I run away? But how? On the old girl’s-style bike in the yard? And where was I supposed to go?

 

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