by Paula Mabbel
“Thelma, you know it’s not like that.”
“Then was is it like? Why did you make love to me if you’re not going to say anything about it or talk to me anymore?”
“Listen, I didn’t exactly plan it. It just kinda happened.”
“So you do think it was a mistake!”
“No. That’s not it. We were drunk is all. I didn’t want to rush into anything, and I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable while you are staying here. I don’t want you to feel like you owe me anything.”
“Is that why you think I wanted you? Because you think I thought I owed you something?”
“Come on. That’s not fair and you know it. Of course I don’t think that. We were having fun, we had a lot to drink, and one thing let to another. That’s it. That’s all I’m saying. It’s not a mistake. It just happened. I liked it. I like you, but I just don’t want you feeling uncomfortable.”
“If you didn’t want me feeling uncomfortable, maybe you should have tried talking to me a little more. Do something. Go out for a change. Ever since you hired the contractor, you’ve hardly looked at me.”
Cannon stopped and thought for a moment. He walked up to her and took her hand.
“Thelma, you’re right. I’m sorry. Now that I think about it, I have ignored you. Not because I thought what we did was a mistake, but because I haven’t been in a relationship in a while. I went from fighting for the country and being shot at to learning about both my parents dying. I’ve been so wrapped up in fixing up this house because it’s help take my mind off things while I sort through my life. It’s not you.”
“‘It’s not you, it’s me’? Is that what you were going to say? So I was just a distraction?”
“No, not at all. I like you. I always have. I’m not sorry about what we did. I enjoyed it. I like you. My mind just hasn’t been in it lately.”
“Well, you won’t have to worry about that. You don’t need my permission, but I’m giving it to you anyway. Feel free to ignore me. You don’t have to talk to me. Hell, I don’t want you to talk to me. This is just an arrangement, okay? I’m here for the free rent, and you’re here for the extra cash, so just leave me the fuck alone, and you can go about your business and pretend I’m not here.”
*****
A world away, the stale taste of sand was fused with a hint of gunpowder and explosives.
Three Navy SEALs wearing camo and a full complement of military-issued weapons and supplies stormed the bunker that housed the suspects they had been tracking for the past several weeks.
“I got your six,” Buck shouted over the ringing in his ears that came from the explosion.
Buck and other two men from his squad, Ace and Smitty, entered from the outside while they communicated with hand signals.
“Got him,” shouted Buck, the leader of the squad, as he pinned the suspect to the ground.
“Get down!” shouted Smitty.
A barrage of bullets peppered the bunker.
“God dammit. I’m hit.”
“How bad is it, Ace?” Buck asked.
Ace peeled back the fabric from his leg, revealing a nickel-sized hole. Blood spurted through the cracks in his fingers.
“I think the bullet nicked an artery,” he replied.
The barrage of bullets abated as they went to work taking quick stock of their surroundings. Buck ripped piece of his shirt and tied it around Ace’s leg.
“You’re gonna make it out of this shit hole, Ace. I promise,” Buck said.
“I better. I’m the one who tracked down these sons of bitches, and I’m damn sure not lettin’ you get all the credit for it.”
“Just for that, I’m not sharing any of my rations with you,” Buck replied.
Buck smiled, but Ace could see that look on his face, the look Buck gave when he knew a man was about to die. He tried to comfort him anyway.
“You’re an asshole, Buck,” Smitty said as he scowled at Buck. “You can share my rations any day, Ace.”
Smitty hoisted Ace over his shoulder, and Buck followed Smitty out the door, dragging two captives with him.
Twenty minutes later, back at camp, Smitty went to work fixing up the wound as best he could, while the two men they captured were out cold in the other room.
Buck picked up the comm with the general, “We got ‘em, sir. One of my men’s hurt badly, but we got him.”
“Any indication of the target, Commander?” General Harris asked Buck.
“Looks like your suspicions were right, General. But there’s something else. We tracked a whole company of ISIS fighters from Mosul. My translator’s looked at the papers and they suggest the fighters have been collaborating with several high-ranking officials in Turkey and Syria. There are cells in fourteen locations across the globe, seven back at home, the rest scattered across Europe and North Africa.”
“Good work, Commander. You’ve saved a lot of lives today. You tell that soldier he’s done his country a great service.”
Several days later, Buck and Smitty were back stateside preparing for Ace’s funeral.
“Give me a beer, and none of that foreign shit, either,” Buck told Jessica.
She went down the list of domestics. He settled for a bottle of Bud.
Cannon gave Buck a hard pat on the back of his soldier.
“It’s good to see you again, Buck. I can’t believe it about Ace. I always thought he’d be one to outlast us all. He had that lucky charm of his. Always seemed to get him out of shit.”
“Funny thing. We were in the hole taking heat. The first bullet blew that cross clean of his neck, not a scratch on him, but it blew the chain and cross right off. The second bullet was the one that killed him.”
“God dammit. Wish I could have been there with you. I would have loved take out the terry that shot our brother,” Cannon said to Buck.
“You may get your wish. I’ve got permission to put together a special team of my men, SEALs only and a just two squads. We’re gonna infiltrate and take care of business. Some shit is going down, and we’re leaving right after the funeral. That’s why I’m here. I know your time is up, but I can’t think of anyone I’d want in my team more than you.”
Jessica listened intently and poured Cannon another double without asking.
“This one’s on me. You gonna leave us again?” Jessica asked.
Buck looked back at Cannon. “The general’s givin’ me 48 hours to put together my team. I need to know by then.”
Cannon chugged down the bourbon then proceeded to finish the evening with Buck and Smitty, catching up on old times and getting completely plastered.
The following morning, Cannon woke early. He went out to the stable and began grooming the coat of Arabian Dancer.
It had been several weeks since he took her out. He had been focused on the all the things that needed fixing around the ranch house. Between his own work and watching the contractors, he had spent little time out in the stables or doing much of anything else.
Cannon lifted himself up onto the saddle and lightly tugged on the reins. Arabian Dancer complied, and she and Cannon moved slowly across the field.
Cannon took in the crisp morning air. He always loved how the cool dew felt that time of year, just after the heat of summer broke and began to bleed into fall.
He stopped. Arabian Dancer’s eyes were bright and focused forward. She gave a snort and a neigh as he gave a gentle tug on the left rein to move the horse into a better position to view the house and land.
“What do you think I should do?” Cannon said to the horse.
He ears were pricked forward, but she remained silent.
“You’re just like all the other women in my life, aren’t you? Quiet when I need your advice the most.”
The horse neighed back in reply.
Cannon sighed and thought about what would be the best course of action. He had served in Buck’s company along with Ace and Smitty on his last tour. They were like brothers to him.
&n
bsp; Cannon stayed out in the field for over an hour until the sun rose, well past the time Thelma usually woke up. When she did, Thelma lifted curtain in her room and saw Cannon motionless on the saddle.
“What’s wrong?” Thelma asked once Cannon returned.
“Who said anything was wrong?”
“I can see it on your face, and I haven’t seen you ride your horse for weeks. Something’s up. What’s going on?”
“A couple of soldiers I served with came to pay me a visit. Another guy we all served with was killed in action.”
Thelma pursed her lips, and reflected on what she wanted to say.
“I’m sorry about your friend,” she said and stepped closer.
“Thanks,” he replied. He took a deep sigh.
“Is there anything I can do?”
“No. But thanks. I’m planning on going to the funeral with Buck and Smitty tomorrow.”
“What was your other friend’s name, the one who was killed?”
“Ace. His name was Ace. We go way back. I knew him before he enlisted, before we were both SEALs, and when he was still in high school. He was a cool guy. He was a great friend. Not the kind of friend that most people call friends. He was a real friend, the kind you kill for, die for. He always thought about us and never tried to take advantage.”
“Sounds like he was a good guy.”
“The best, and now he is gone.”
Thelma walked closer. Her heart skipped, and she swallowed. She looked up at Cannon and placed her hand on his arm.
“Are you sure there’s nothing I can do?” she asked.
Cannon shook his head. He looked as if he had just shaken himself from a daze to refocus his attention on something purposeful.
“You know, one time we were in Afghanistan and he saved my ass. It was right after I was commissioned, and I got my orders. I was fresh out of camp, way before I trained to be a SEAL. We were taking heavy fire and I was scared shitless. He had already served a tour ahead of me, so he knew the routine.”
“What happened?”
“I was just kind of standing there, out in the open. It was only for a few seconds, but I swear I should have been dead. The other soldiers had taken cover, and I was just frozen like a deer in headlights. Then out of nowhere, there’s this rocket propelled grenade that lands right by my feet. I stand there motionless, like a statue, and he picks it up and throws it fifty yards away. He didn’t even hesitate. The second it landed in front of me, all I saw was his hand darting down to the ground and then tossing it across the way.”
“What happened after that?”
“It exploded. I got this right here,” Cannon said as he took off his shirt and showed Thelma the scar from the shrapnel that grazed him during the incident.
“Luckily for us, he threw it when he did. If he had waited a split second, we’d all be dead. I’d be dead. And that wasn’t the first or last time either. The guy was like a vampire. He never died. He wore this funky-looking cross on a chain. That was his good luck charm, he always used to tell us. He saved Smitty and Buck and bunch of times. I don’t know how he did it, but he saved my ass. He saved all of our asses a dozen times over.”
“Well, I’m sorry about your friend.”
“I appreciate that. But his death has got me thinking.”
“Thinking about what?”
*****
“Nothing. I just need a drink,” Cannon said.
“What is it? You said it’s got you thinking. What are you thinking?”
“My tour is up, but I’m going to reenlist. Those damned terrorist killed Ace. Nobody kills Ace, not without some retribution. Buck asked me to join his company for a tour back in the desert. We’ll be able to get some justice and protect the country at the same time. Best of all, if I go, I’ll be able to get a reenlistment bonus of twenty-five grand.”
Thelma’s heart sank.
“And how long would you be gone for? How long would your tour last?”
“I don’t know, eighteen months at least. Could be longer. Most likely I’ll be gone for another four years. After I finish my mission I’m sure my superiors will station me elsewhere for reallocation and training.”
“And what about the house? When are you planning on leaving?”
“A couple days.”
“A couple days?”
“Don’t worry, Thelma. You can stay in the house. I wouldn’t ask you to leave. Besides, I really could use your help in making sure that contractors don’t steal anything and that they get all the work done.”
“What about us?”
“I didn’t realize there was an ‘us’ anymore. I mean, it was only one time, and you haven’t exactly been warm to me in the last month. I thought you would be happy if I left.”
She looked in his direction and shook her head.
“You really are clueless, aren’t you?”
She stepped closer.
“I told you before, relationships aren’t my thing. I’ve never been good at them.”
“But you’re a good man.”
“You think so?”
Thelma took another step. Only a few inches separated her from his skin. She took her other hand and grabbed his arm, feeling his biceps and letting he hand fall down to his fingertips.
“I know so. You care about your friend. You miss your parents, and I’ve know you since you were a kid. You always want to do the right thing, even if it’s not the smart thing. You’re loyal, and honest, and kind.”
She took another step. Now her body was touching his. Her chest was pushed up against him, and it was difficult for him to think of anything else except the warm bosom that was pressed to his chest.
Thelma titled her chin up, inviting him to kiss her lips. Her heart pounded faster, and her skin turned pale.
Cannon caressed the skin on her face and moved closer.
His pulse quickened, and he felt the warmth of her lips on his, letting strands of saliva form between them like a complicated dance of spider webs.
She pulled back.
“What is it?” Cannon asked.
“I have something to tell you too.”
*****
“So, how dangerous is this mission of yours, Cannon, if you go?”
“Dangerous. But I’ll be with the best. We’re the best. That’s why I think I have to do this. Our country is in danger. I know it’s worth it. I’m not afraid to die.”
“I don’t want you to go. I think it’s great you want to serve your country, but you’ve already done enough. Don’t you think there’s another way you can help out without going to war?”
“Maybe so, but Ace is dead. They killed Ace.”
“I don’t want you to die also. Don’t you think there’s been enough death in the last year, first with your parents and now with your friend Ace? Do you think this is what he would have wanted?”
“Yes. I do. Ace would have done it for us. The least we can do is find the people who shot him and go kick their asses. Now, you said you had some news of your own. What is it?”
“A couple weeks ago, I could tell something was wrong. I was getting these headaches. They just wouldn’t go away. And then I started to feel tired all the time. I started having dizzy spells, and then I woke up one morning and I couldn’t breath. I started wheezing, and it took me several minutes to catch my breath.”
“What was it? What was wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong, Cannon. I wasn’t sure what it was at first, but then my mother started noticing when I came around the shop. She could tell something was off.”
“What did she say?”
“She said she recognized what was going on, and she told me to take a test, so I did.”
“What did the test say?”
“It said I’m pregnant.”
Cannon’s eyes widened, and a tingling sensation overtook his body. He could feel his skin heating up, and he felt like he was about to pass out.
“You’re what?”
“I’m pregnant
.”
Cannon stood there in silence and swallowed.
Thelma stared back at him, beckoning with her eyes for him to say something. After a few moments of letting the initial shock wear off, he asked, “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, Cannon. I’m sure. I took the test three times, and then I went to the doctor and confirmed it. I’m having a baby. Your baby.”
“I’m not sure what to say.”
Cannon put his hand on her stomach.
“You’re not going to be able to notice anything just yet. I’m only a month along.”
“Is this what you want? Do you want to be with me?”
“Of course, Cannon. I want to be with you.”
*****
The next morning, Cannon woke up and made a pot of coffee.
“Thelma, I thought about it. I even dreamed about it.”
Cannon brought the cup of steaming hot coffee to his mouth and took a sip.
“Here’s the thing. I called the general last night. I’ve spoken again with Buck, and I’ve really thought this thing through.”
“And what?”
“I have to go serve my country. I need to find out who did this, and take him out. I’m going to track down the enemy and then I’m going to kill him.”
Thelma’s face turned white. She could hear a ringing in her ears that silenced everything else around her.
“What about us? What about the baby?”
“I want you both, but I have to do right by my country too.”
“So, you’re just going to leave? You’re going without me, and you expect me to wait around for four years hoping that you’re still alive, leaving me to raise our baby alone until you get back years later?”
“Well, not exactly. Like I said. I spoke to the general. He said that he would allow me to extend my service without signing on for another full tour. I could be in and out in a few months, and be back before the baby is born, if everything goes as planned. I’ll find the terrorists responsible and gather enough intel, which I’ll hand off to Buck and the rest of the SEALs to take them on without me.”
“But you could still die. I might end up raising our child alone, without you,” Thelma replied.
“Life is full of risk. Every decision we make, everything we do has some risk. I could die tomorrow walking across the street or doing just about anything.”