My Secret Alpha Step SEAL

by Paula Mabbel

  “No, it’s OK. Just… Please call me when you can. We should talk.”

  He paused and I heard him exhale in frustration. “Look, give me a little time. Let’s see what I can do tonight.”

  I hang up, too weak against the torrent of pain that spilled out into bitter tears. I had a suspicion he wouldn’t call anytime soon so I just lay on the couch, where I had fallen on the side, and cried hard, holding my belly.

  It had to have been too good, too perfect to be true, what we had. It all happened so fast, I didn't have time to prepare myself for the possibility of losing him. Especially like this. But I had to face the music.

  I had a good job, I could afford to be a single mother. I had a big family and they could help me. All that mattered now, strangely, was to have a healthy baby. I had just learned of it’s existence today, but my thoughts were already revolving on him. Or her.

  But what about Aldo? I couldn't bear the thought of not seeing him again.

  I placed both my hands on my belly, trying to get used to the fact that, regardless of whatever might happen next, I still had a part of him. A part that I will cherish and protect for the rest of my life.

  I had almost fallen asleep when my phone rang. It was him, he had kept his word.

  “Hi, Aldo.”

  “I’m sorry for earlier, but people were listening in, my love. I managed to leave the dinner party early. You sounded upset. What happened?”

  Hearing him call me his love had broken the dams again and tears were now falling down my cheeks.

  “Are you crying, Lydia?”

  “I’m sorry, I’m fine.”

  “Oh, God. I’m so sorry I haven’t called these days. But I had to show them I was still in charge. It’s dangerous if they suspect any sign of weakness and I have lots of enemies inside the organization I have to worry about. I’m sorry I haven't been in touch, baby. I really am.”

  I simply listened to him, happy to hear his voice again. Of course, I understood. He wouldn’t have abandoned me like that, he had a reason for his behavior.

  “Baby? Are you still there?”

  “Yes. Sorry.”

  “What was it that you wanted to talk about?”

  I felt a knot in my stomach. “It’s… Umm… It’s OK. Maybe we should talk face to face about it.”

  “What is it, my love? You know we cannot be seen together now.”

  “I can’t. It’s just… It’s not something you should find out over the phone.”

  “I don’t like the sound of that, Lydia. Tell me.”

  His tone had changed, he sounded harsher. “Tell me.”

  I felt sick. “I’m pregnant.”

  “What?”

  “I’m pregnant. I’m sorry you had to find out like this. Oh, God, I'm going to be sick.”

  I dropped the phone and ran to the bathroom. Before I could regain my composure enough to come back out, Aldo was already at my place.

  *****

  I was wringing my hands nervously, waiting for Aldo to come get me from the car. Last night, he had decided I was to meet his family first thing this morning.

  That was not possible due to my morning sickness, but we managed to arrive at the estate right before noon.

  He had gone in first, to see if everyone was home, as he requested, and was to come back and take me to them.

  I was so nervous, I feared I might puke in front of everybody. I didn’t even see him stop at my side before he put his hand on my shoulder.

  “Are you alright?” he asked, concern painted all over his face.

  I nodded.

  “Are you sure?”

  I nodded again, clearing my throat.

  “Then, let’s go, my love. Let’s get this bullshit over with.”

  I clung to his arm, not trusting my knees completely, and followed him into the house.

  He guided me to the large room his family was gathered. His blood family.

  I saw his mother the second I walked through the door. A small woman, looking to be over seventy years old, she gave me a disgusted look and turned away.

  “What is that doing here?” she asked another woman, who was sitting beside her. Before she could answer, Aldo spoke:

  “She is here because I have an announcement to make.”

  “No, you don’t,” his mother said, her words sounding final. She acted like a woman who was used to wielding great power.

  “Yes, I do.” Everyone looked at him, looking surprised by his boldness.

  The matriarch looked him up and down, squinting with judgment in her eyes.

  “Is she pregnant?” she finally asked, and I thought I would faint.

  “Yes.” I knew he wasn’t the type to beat around the bush but his blunt admission would only work against us.

  “That explains it, then.” She turned to me. “How much?” she asked.

  “Three weeks,” I stuttered, unsure of what she was asking. Her thick accent confused me, on top of everything else.

  “No, I meant how much money do you want.”

  “What?”

  I looked up at Aldo, too shocked to even speak. He squeezed my hand and gave me a reassuring look.

  “She doesn’t want money and what she wants, at the moment, is not up to discussion anyway. We’re here because I wanted to offer you the courtesy of learning about our engagement from me, personally.”

  I was as surprised as everyone else. It was the first time I was hearing about his decision and it was all becoming too much.

  I felt my knees give in. My mind couldn't catch up and help me out, so I slipped out of Aldo’s hand and hit the floor with a thud.

  I could barely make out the commotion going on around me. Someone that smelled like Aldo carried me to a large sofa, while someone else yelled for a doctor.

  I waved the option off, feeling I could do without any more fuss, but my gesture went unnoticed as they were starting to argue with each other.

  I was gradually coming to my senses so I managed to understand the exchange. They were speaking in Italian but the words hurt just the same.

  His mother insisted his stunt was all nonsense and that she would not, under any circumstances, agree to such a marriage. I thought I heard her present an array of other, more suitable options for the head of a respectable family, but Aldo wouldn't hear of it. The old woman argued that for someone to enter the family, one had to bring something to the table and I was of no value to her.

  Then, Aldo confessed that the lucrative resolution to their most recent problem had come from me. His mother called him a liar, her last words a statement of pure hate. She declared him disowned for wanting to bring filth into the family and before anyone realized what had just happened, I heard her start for the door.

  “Basta,” I shouted, unable to keep my thoughts silent anymore. Everyone turned to me. “Posso capire tutto quello che avete detto.”

  I had to let them know I understood what they said.

  I struggled to sit up, supporting myself on Aldo’s arm.

  “You have no right to talk about me like that. You don’t know me, you’re not better than me and, above all, I haven’t done anything to you or your family to explain your hate.”

  She started to speak, but I cut her off.

  “I do not care about what you want to say right now. You had your chance to speak and used it to muddy your own son. If you don’t have the sense to judge a person by who they are, you have no right speak before me. Much less to make decisions like disowning Aldo. Do you understand what you just did?”

  If looks could have killed, I would’ve been slayed a long time ago by her venomous gaze.

  “You just chose a prejudice over your own son, your blood.”

  I felt a knot in my throat, but I didn’t want to cry. I haven’t realized that I was already crying until Aldo wiped my wet cheeks and cradled me into his arms.

  “It’s alright, my love. It’s alright,” he whispered, protectively.

  I needed to say more, I fel
t I had to defend the father of my child, but his mother spoke before me:

  “Where is that doctor? This woman is pregnant, for God’s sake.”

  I looked up at Aldo, but he seemed as confused as I was.

  “We have called Don Giorgio already, Signora,” someone said.

  “Good. What are you waiting for, Aldo?”

  He frowned.

  “Take your fiancé upstairs. You’re not going to keep her on her feet all day, are you?”

  *****

  THE END

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  Ball So Hard: A Baltimore Love Story

  James was raised by his older sister Kelly in the inner city projects of Baltimore, Maryland. Kelly was the one who made sure that James finished high school. Kelly was the one who made sure that James studied for and aced the SAT’s. Kelly was the one who helped James with his college applications and Kelly was there to celebrate with James when he received his acceptance letter from Morgan State University. When James and Kelly’s father had passed, their mother fell apart. Their mother started leaving James and Kelly home alone for long periods of time while she was out all day and night doing drugs. She started being gone for longer spurts than she was home, leaving them for days and weeks at a time. Eventually, their mother left completely, never to return home, although sometimes they saw her around the city.

  They soon realized that they were on their own and would have to fend for themselves. Although she was only seventeen at the time, their desperate situation forced Kelly to step up and take charge of their situation. Kelly began working a full-time job so that they wouldn’t get evicted. After Kelly had graduated from high school, she began working a second job, part time. Instead of going away to college, Kelly decided to continue living at home so that she could take care of her brother, making sure that the rent was paid, that there was food for James to eat, and that James made it to school. More than once, James had insisted on finding a job to help his sister but she was firm about him focusing on school and basketball. Kelly was more like a mother to James than a big sister and she made sure to keep James out of trouble. Their father had been a big time drug dealer and had died in the streets, shot and robbed by a rival drug dealer, so Kelly worked hard to prevent James from going down the same path. Kelly was proud of James getting into college and bought him all of the things that he would need for the upcoming school semester. When James had to leave for school early in the summer to start basketball practice, Kelly drove him, just as excited about James going away as James was.

  “I’m living vicariously through you little brother! I want to hear all about it, make sure you call me and come home to visit!” Kelly told him on their way to the campus.

  When James arrived on campus, there were a considerable amount of students already there. Exchange students, graduate students, students taking summer classes and other athletes. The team began practicing immediately, and Coach Murry worked them hard. Every morning and evening before and after practice, the team ate together in the dining hall. James was there a full month before the day finally came for the rest of the freshmen class to move in. All of his suitemates played basketball with him. His roommate, a tall, lanky kid from New Jersey, named Jarred, was the team’s third-string center. James ate breakfast by the windows with Jarred and their suitemate, Myles. James had a plate piled high with French toast sticks that he had arranged into a pyramid. Beside his plate was a bowl of maple syrup and three boiled eggs. Jarred was eating a stack of pancakes, cheesy scrambled eggs, and bacon. Myles was eating oatmeal, a bowl of fruit, and a fried omelet, with a side of sausages. Each one of them had two tall glasses of orange juice each.

  “Where’s Chaz and Ricky?” Jarred asked Myles. Chaz was Myles roommate, and Ricky was their other suitemate. Myles shrugged.

  “Still asleep,” he answered through a mouth full of omelet. Jarred shook his head and ate a piece of bacon. James looked out of the floor to ceiling windows of the dining hall to see the other freshmen’s moving in. A unique looking girl standing on the sidewalk caught his eyes. She had a Mohawk with long fire engine red dreadlocks that hung down her back from a high ponytail. Her smooth caramel skin glowed in the sunlight as she stood beside a mountain of luggage looking both lost and confused.

  “I’ll see you guys at practice!” James said hurriedly as he gathered his plates and began making his way towards the trash receptacles beside the dining hall exit. Jarred threw up his hands in protest, but James was already gone, outside jogging towards the girl with the Mohawk.

  Jessica’s mood had done a total 180 upon arriving on campus at Morgan State University. She stood awkwardly in the middle of the sidewalk, her luggage beside her. A slight breeze ruffled her white skater dress and blew a few of her long locks across her face. She moved the hair from her eyes in time to notice someone running towards her. Before Jessica had departed for Baltimore, her father had warned her to “stay away from the basketball players.” From the looks of it, one of the basketball players that her father had warned her about was headed straight for her. And it begins, Jessica thought to herself. He was tall and chocolatey, his muscles bulging as he jogged over to her wearing athletic team sweats. He stopped in front of her, and Jessica had to shade her eyes with her hands to see him in the sunlight. He had a baby face and a big smile with deep dimples. His hair was cut short in neat waves, and he smelled good.

  “Need some help?” He asked her good-naturedly. Jessica folded her arms over her chest stubbornly then let them drop to her sides before settling on placing them on her hips. She didn’t want help, but although she hated to admit it, she did need it.

  “Yea, I can’t find the freshmen dorms. I caught a cab here from the train station, and they just left my bags here,” Jessica explained. He smiled again.

  “So where are you from?” James asked her.

  “New Jersey, you?”

  “B-More born and raised!” he exclaimed. “Stay here, I’ll get you a cart to put your luggage in,” he offered before turning to go. He stopped himself and faced her once more, extending a hand; he said, “My name’s James, by the way.” Jessica took his hand in hers, shaking it.

  “Jessica.”

  “Nice to meet you, Jessica,” he said before turning to jog away to the freshmen dorms. He passed a guy who was returning an empty cart and stopped him. “Hey, are you done with that?” he asked. The guy nodded and passed it to him without a word. “Thanks,” James said. The guy just nodded again before continuing on his way.

  James began pushing the cart back to where Jessica was standing. Jessica held the cart still while James loaded her luggage into it. He looked at Jessica when he was done.

  “Thank you, James,” she told him, finally smiling. James beamed. She had a really pretty smile, despite her braces.

  “You’re very welcome Miss Jessica,” he told her. They stood there awkwardly for a moment.

  “So the freshmen dorms are that way?” she asked, pointing in the direction from where he had found the cart.

  “Yea.”

  “Thanks. I’ll see you around,” Jessica said as she slowly began pushing the cart.

  “I hope so,” James said smiling. She smiled and rolled her eyes as she continued pushing her cart. James watched her until she was out of sight and then glanced at his phone. Practice was about to start, and he had less than five minutes to get to the gym. James took off running.

  Jessica headed into the open doors of the freshmen dormitory. She scanned the room, bustling with freshmen and parents in search of someone who could help her and noticed that a few students were wearing t-shirts emblazoned with the words “Resident Assistant” on them. J
essica pushed her cart towards a girl wearing a Resident Assistant shirt and holding a list. The girl beamed as Jessica approached.

  “Hello and welcome to Morgan State! My name is Tiffany, and I am the 5th floor Resident Assistant,” the girl exclaimed. Jessica forced herself to smile back.

  “Hi Tiffany, I’m Jessica. I’m moving in, but I don’t know what room I’m supposed to be in.” Jessica admitted.

  “Nice to meet you! Let’s find out what room you’re in.” Tiffany said as she perused the list. “Ok, Jessica, you’re in room 303A. Your RA is Sylvia. Let me get you your keys.” Tiffany headed over to a check-in table and began sorting through a box of small manila envelopes. She produced one that was labeled 303A and handed it to Jessica. “The elevators are over there.” Tiffany pointed to the elevators where a group of students, parents, and carts waited for an elevator to come down.

  “Thank you,” Jessica told Tiffany before pushing her cart over to the group by the elevators. When the elevator arrived, and the doors opened, it was full, and a stream of students and parents poured out. The people in front of me filled the elevator, and Jessica was forced to wait for the next one. When another elevator arrived, and the people got off, I was the first one to board it, and a couple of other girls got on behind me. I was standing beside the elevators control panel, so I pressed the button for the third floor. “What floor?” I asked the two girls.