by Force, Marie
“You don’t have to be.”
“You’re not in charge here, remember?”
“Mmmm, okay.” We both know I am in charge because I can stop whatever we’re doing with one word. But I let him think he’s the boss when we’re in bed because he likes it so much—and I always benefit from his dominance with the kind of orgasms I thought only happened in porn movies.
“You frighten me when you’re so agreeable,” he says.
My laughter becomes a moan when he unties the bows at my hips and removes the bikini bottoms, leaving me bare before him.
He skims his hands over my cheeks, gently as promised, while I try not to squirm from the desire that beats through me like a live wire attached to a nuclear power plant. All he has to do is look at me and I want him, but when he dominates me, the desire becomes something bigger and more consuming. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before I experienced him.
He slides fur-lined cuffs over my wrists. “Keep them right here.”
As I lick lips gone completely dry, I’ll confess to having been skeptical and somewhat ignorant about BDSM, allowing perceptions to become my reality. I’m finding I was completely clueless about what it’s really like until Emmett showed me how powerful it can be to turn over your pleasure to a partner and how transformative it is to surrender completely. It also requires a level of trust I’ve never conveyed to another man, which deepens the emotional bonds as well as the physical.
I trust Emmett to see to my pleasure and my well-being, which makes it possible to let go of my worries to focus exclusively on the pleasure. And the pleasure is sublime. I’m not sure if that’s because of the anticipation that comes from not being completely certain of what’s going to happen next or if it’s because I know the orgasms will be epic. Perhaps it’s both those things along with knowing he’s completely focused on me for this time we have alone together. There’s no one else, nothing else but the two of us and the crazy attraction we can’t seem to sate no matter how hard we try. And we try really, really hard.
His lips skim along my backbone from top to bottom, his tongue dipping into the indents at the bottom of my spine. The light touch of his hands and tongue electrify me. That’s how it is with him. He barely touches me and I come alive with every part of my body engaged in what we’re doing. It isn’t lost on me that he’s ruining me for sex with anyone but him—and I’m letting that happen. Maybe I’ll live to regret it, but for right now, I’m too enthralled by him to be properly concerned about what might happen in the future.
I’m one big nerve ending as his lips move over the supersensitive skin on my ass. It’s all I can do not to dissolve into a blob of need on the bed. Holding the position he requested is a challenge with my legs trembling madly. The clicking of the cap on the lube bottle may as well be a shotgun blast for the way it amps up the anxiety and desire. I’ve never felt both those things at the same time before, and it’s amazing how the anxiety feeds the desire and makes it more.
My heart beats so hard that I can hear it fluttering in my ears and feel the pulse in my neck and wrists.
He applies the lube to my bottom and slides his fingers into my tight entrance.
I focus on breathing, on remaining calm and trying to give him anything and everything he wants without somehow ruining it. I want him to see me as a sexy, mature woman who is his equal in all things, not a little girl who giggles like a fool whenever he touches me this way.
“Push back and let me in,” he says in that gruff voice I love so much.
I follow his instructions and press back against his fingers, which slide into me with ease. I had no idea I would like anal play so much until he showed me how arousing it can be. He fucks me with his fingers and then suddenly withdraws them.
He quickly replaces them with the plug. “Let’s try this again, shall we?” Unlike last time, he doesn’t tease or torment me. Rather, he puts constant, steady pressure on the plug, which is much larger than his fingers were. I begin to feel panicky and uncertain that I can do this.
“Breathe,” he says.
I release a gasp and suck in a deep breath.
As I’m breathing, he fully seats the plug. “That’s my girl. You did it.”
I blink back tears that make me wonder where the hell they came from. Why am I crying? I have no idea, but the emotional overload is significant, and I can’t stop the tears that flow unabated.
“Talk to me,” he says. “How do you feel?”
“Overwhelmed.”
“In a bad way?”
“No. A good way.”
“You’re so sexy and sweet. You have no idea how much I want you.”
“Show me.”
Chapter 17
He presses his hard cock against my pussy, and the first half slides into me without resistance. But that’s the only part of this that’s easy. The plug makes things tighter than usual, and we’re a close fit without the plug. “Tell me if it hurts.”
“It doesn’t.” I grasp handfuls of the comforter, seeking something to hold on to as he takes me on the wildest ride I’ve ever been on. Then he tugs on the plug with one hand while pressing on my clit with the other, and I ignite in an orgasm so powerful, my mind goes blank and my body seizes so hard that I see stars. I come down from the incredible high to realize I’m the only one who exploded. He’s still hard as a rock and moving inside me, his fingers digging into my hips as he hammers into me.
I can’t believe when I feel the climb begin again, so quickly after the last time. I’ve heard about women who were multi-orgasmic, but I’ve never been one of them.
He tugs on the plug again. “I want you here. Tell me you want that, too.”
The thought of it scares me. I won’t deny that, but I have faith in him to make it amazing for me, so I push through the fear to give him something I’ve never given anyone else. “I want that, too.”
The groan that comes from him is the sexiest fucking sound I’ve ever heard. He withdraws from me slowly and then turns me over, brushing the hair back from my face.
“Hi,” he says, flashing the potent grin that’s turned me to mush from the beginning.
“Hi.”
“How’s it going?”
“Not bad, you?” With my arms still stretched over my head, my breasts are high and tight against his chest as his hard cock pulses against my clit.
His fingers glide over my face, and the way he looks at me…
I see everything I want and need in his gorgeous eyes.
“Tell me the truth. Do you really want to do this?”
“I want to try.” I feel brave and empowered. He’s given me that, and I want to give this to him.
“What’s your safe word for this?”
“Quantum.”
“And you’ll use it if you need it?”
“Yes, I will.”
Cupping my cheek, he kisses me, and I feel the emotion coming from him. It’s every bit as powerful as what I feel for him. I have no doubt at all about that. He kisses his way down the front of me, paying homage to each breast and running his tongue lightly over my nipples. I’m so aroused that even the slightest touch is extra potent.
Kneeling between my legs, he keeps his gaze fixed on me as he smooths lube over his cock, which is so hard, it looks bigger than it ever has before. Figures that would happen now.
I swallow hard, scared but determined to try. I’ll keep that safe word on the tip of my tongue and won’t hesitate to use it if it’s too much for me.
He pulls on the plug, removes it and replaces it with his much-larger cock.
My first thought is hell, no. No way! There’s no freaking way this can happen.
“Look at me.”
I flip my gaze up to meet his and immediately find my center. It’s right there in him, and the sight of his face reminds me that he cares, that I trust him, that he’d rather die than hurt me. I believe that, especially after what he told me about Elena.
“Nice and easy,” he
says, keeping his movements small and gradual.
It hurts, a lot, but it’s not unbearable. Not yet anyway.
“Keep breathing. Big breaths. That’s it. You’re doing so great.” He nuzzles my neck, and the brush of his stubble against my skin is stunning in the way the sensations travel through my entire body, seeming to come together where we’re joined. “Ready for more?”
I whimper. I can’t. I begin to thrash, trying to get away from the invasion, but he pins down my hips to hold me still. “Do you need your safe word?”
I shake my head.
“Give me words.”
“No.”
He pushes in farther, and I scream—not from the pain, which is still present, but from the pleasure that mixes with the pain to take me higher than I’ve been before. It’s a whole other level that I couldn’t describe if all the words in the world were made available to me. I want to beg him to stop and beg him to never stop, and I know that sounds crazy, but that’s how it feels.
“You’re so hot and so tight,” he whispers in that gruff, sexy voice that captivates me. “You turn me on like no one ever has.”
Hearing that is like gas being poured on the wildfire that burns within me, and I find myself raising my hips, looking for more.
He groans and gives me it to me, entering me fully on that final stroke. “Leah… God damn, you’re amazing.
“I want my hands.”
The cuffs are immediately released, and I wrap my arms around him, needing to hold on for what’s coming next. As it’s happening, I can’t actually believe I’m doing this, but then he flexes his hips and I’m reminded that not only am I doing it, it’s not over yet. Not by a long shot.
“I need to move,” he says. “Tell me you’re okay.”
“I’m okay.” I give a subtle lift of my hips to encourage him to do what he wants. In this moment, he could ask me for anything and I’d find a way to give it to him. I’m lost to him, ruined for anyone who isn’t him and more in love with him than I ever imagined possible.
“Hold on to me. Don’t ever let go.”
“I won’t let go. I’ll never let go.”
He begins to move, retreating almost completely before filling me again. He does this repeatedly, giving me gentle but insistent strokes that have me climbing toward something different, something huge that seems almost out of reach until his thumb finds my clit and I come harder than the first time. Everything goes blank, and I’m transported. The only thing I’m aware of is pure bliss.
She’s in subspace. I’ve seen it before, so I recognize it, but I’m still undone by how deeply she goes under and how long it takes to bring her back. Even after an epic orgasm, I’m still hard, but I don’t dare withdraw from her until she’s aware and prepared. I kiss her face and lips, which are curved into a satisfied little smile that makes my heart flutter with tenderness that’s all new to me. I’m always careful and respectful with women, especially during scenes, but this one… She’s crawled so deep inside me, I’ll never get her out, and I don’t want to. I want her right here with me, where she belongs.
I kiss her lips, her cheeks, her determined little chin and the tip of her nose. “Leah.” I run the tip of my tongue over her lips. “Sweetheart, talk to me.”
“Hmmm.”
“Are you in there?”
“Mmmm-hmmm.”
“Open your eyes.”
“Can’t. They’re too heavy.”
I kiss the closed lids and breathe in the scent of her, a scent I’d recognize anywhere in this world as her, as mine. “Leah…”
She forces her eyes open, her smile growing as she blinks me into focus. “I did it.”
“You certainly did.” I’m amused by her, as always. Then I give a little flex of my hips to remind her where I am, in case she’d forgotten.
Her moan travels straight to my balls, and my cock expands inside her, which actually hurts. My cock is better than it was a few days ago, but not fully recovered, and it’s aching from the workout I just put it through.
“Noooo. Get out.”
Laughing, I withdraw slowly and carefully as she gasps and squirms. “Stay right there,” I tell her, kissing her once more.
“I couldn’t move if I had to.”
I go into the adjoining bathroom to clean up and return with a warm towel for her.
She is docile as a lamb while I tend to her, which is a funny thought because my Leah is never docile, except, it seems, after she’s been fucked into submission.
When I’m finished, I get back on the bed and reach for her.
Turning to face me, she snuggles into my embrace, her leg between mine and her arm around me. It’s so right with her, and I feel almost silly for trying to avoid her for so long when we could’ve had this so much sooner.
“You should move in with me.” I hadn’t planned to say that, but the words appear and they need to be said.
She stares at me, eyes wide with shock. “What?”
“You heard me.”
Her mouth opens and then snaps closed.
“Have I finally found a way to render you speechless?” I love that I’ve shocked and surprised her. If she was looking for proof that I meant what I said on the plane yesterday, here it is. I’m in. I’m all in, and I want her sleeping next to me every night from now on. “Leah?”
“I, um, don’t know what to say.”
“Well, that’s a first.” I run my fingers through her hair with one hand and caress her back with the other. “You’re leaving me high and dry here.”
“I’ve hardly left you high or dry.”
I laugh, as I often do with her. I’ve laughed more with her than I have with any woman, even Elena. I’ve come to see that my “gold standard” relationship was lacking in many things. Being with Leah has helped me to understand that there’s far more to a real relationship than yearning and unrequited love. Elena never thought of me as anything more than a buddy. But Leah loves me, and that’s the greatest gift anyone has ever given me.
“You’re not exactly jumping for joy at the thought of moving in with me.”
“You surprised the hell out of me. Only yesterday, I was still talking you into being with me and now you want me to live with you? I’m kind of getting whiplash here.”
“This, us… All of it… It’s a big deal for me.”
“I know,” she says, caressing my face. “It is for me, too.” She takes my hand and places it over her fast-beating heart. “Feel that?”
“Uh-huh.”
“That’s what happened when you asked me to move in with you.”
“That feels rather serious.”
“It does, doesn’t it?”
“Is that bad?”
“No, but it’s kind of scary.”
“You aren’t supposed to be afraid of me, remember?”
“I’m not afraid of you physically. You pose a much bigger threat to the heart that’s beating so hard and so fast.”
“Your heart is safe with me.”
“Emmett…” She closes her eyes, and a tear escapes from the corner of her left eye.
I kiss it away. “Don’t cry. You know I can’t handle girl tears.”
She laughs but the tears continue to fall, each one of them shattering me.
“I can’t believe you’re doing this to me. My strong, fearless, sassy Leah doesn’t cry like a girl.”
“She does when the guy she’s crazy about asks her to live with him.”
“I take it back, then. If there’re going to be tears, I do not want you to live with me.”
“You can’t take it back.”
I brush frantically at the tears, each one of them unmanning me. “I just did.”
She shakes her head and flashes that angelic smile that lights up her teary eyes. With her hand curling around the back of my neck, she draws me into the sweetest kiss of my life.
I lose all sense of time and place. There’s only her. Leah. Her lips are soft, her tongue is tempting, and her lith
e body pressed against mine is the only thing I want or need. I’m utterly bewitched by her and desperate to keep her as close to me as I can get her for as long as she wants to be there, which I hope is a very long time.
“Say yes,” I whisper against her lips. “Live with me. Sleep with me every night. Be mine.”
“Are you sure?” she asks, sounding tentative.
“I’m one thousand percent sure.”
She takes a deep breath, closes her eyes and exhales. “Yes.”
I’ve never once experienced relief as profound as I do when she whispers that single word. I feel as if I’ve been given everything I need with one small word. Gathering her into my arms, I hold her so tightly, she squeaks from the squeeze of my arms around her.
“Don’t break me.”
“Never.” My desire to protect and cherish her is fierce.
“Could I ask you something?” she says, sounding tentative.
“Anything you want.”
She pulls back so she can see my face. “What happened to change your mind?”
I understand what she’s asking. Only a few days ago, I was determined to sleep with her once, get her out of my system and return to normal. “You happened.” I run my fingers through her hair as I try to find the words I need. “I thought I was doing fine on my own, but then you showed me I wasn’t. I wasn’t fine at all. And now that you’ve changed everything for me, all I can think about is keeping you right here with me where you belong.”
“I keep thinking that I wanted this so badly, my imagination made it all up. I really hope it’s not a dream, because I’ll be crushed to wake up.”
“It’s not a dream.” I kiss her. “I promise it’s real.”
“And you’re not going to suddenly change your mind or freak out or—”
I kiss her again. “I can’t promise I’ll never freak out, but I’m not going to change my mind. I want you, and I want this. I want us. I want you to continue to make me laugh so hard, I ache. I want you to continue to irritate me and push my buttons and drive me crazy in every possible way.”
“I can do that. I’m very good at being irritating and at pushing your buttons.”