And I realized what she was doing.
Her heart lay directly between the points of the crescent.
Her heart lay directly beneath the tip of the ichor dagger.
She slowly trailed her fingers down my ribs, leaving a wake of goosebumps, until she gripped my oblique muscles. With surprising strength, she pulled me atop her, forcing me to straddle or stab her. I settled my weight over her, feeling a tear roll down my cheek from the strain of not blinking.
“You must be in control of everything, Temple,” she moaned, taking a deep breath so that my blade actually pierced her skin enough to draw a bead of blood. My forearm tensed as I suddenly felt a thrill of adrenaline—a godkiller responding to a god’s blood. My muscles grew rock hard and my glowing veins bulged with anticipation. Aphrodite licked her lips, and then arched her head back enough to bare her throat and press her chest against the blade, taunting the killer inside me. “In control of everything,” she repeated in a breathy whisper. “Especially yourself. At all times. If you lose that—giving into those base urges—you will lose yourself. I will not permit this, so you will have to kill me if you wish to continue an existence of ignorance. I will swallow your carnage,” she repeated firmly, letting out a gasp that made my heart race wildly.
She continued gripping my waist, waiting for me to make my decision.
She had let a godkiller into the silken sheets of her bedchambers, and she was letting him see just how dangerous of a decision that had been—for her. All to prove that she believed her lesson more important than the personal danger.
Or she was seriously into some kinky fetishes involving danger in the bedroom.
What the fuck did she really want that made her take such a risk? It couldn’t be just to save my heart. No one was that altruistic—that giving.
I finally let out a gasp and withdrew my hands. The ichor dagger evaporated like smoke. I stared down in fear and Aphrodite spoke in a calm, reassuring murmur. “It drains quickly, and costs much. Do not use it unless absolutely necessary,” she whispered with an edge of fear.
I nodded, and suddenly felt a violent surge of vertigo tilting the room at a sharp angle. She reached up and caught me, cupping my cheeks in her palms and pulling me down to her mouth.
I collapsed into her arms, my muscles feeling like jelly. Our lips touched and I cried out, my body spasming as my veins erupted with a jolt of energy. Her hands reflexively clutched my face tighter and she let out her own involuntary whimper so that for the space of a single heartbeat, we tasted each other’s breath. We both clamped our lips shut at the same time, and then clutched each other tightly, trembling in unison, both blindsided by the physical response. If I had accidentally tasted anything beyond her lips, I might have lost all control. Judging by her response, she trusted herself just as little.
And that was the danger of our little game. That our hormones would take the wheel if we weren’t careful. If we weren’t in control. But whatever that had been, it hadn’t been natural.
That being said, the feel of her maddeningly warm lips against mine was more satisfying than any tongue-on-tongue action I’d ever experienced. More exciting and impactful. Even more bizarre was the fact that I knew there had been nothing even remotely sexual in her action. And yet…there had been more love in that kiss than anything I had ever felt. It was almost as if I’d accidentally licked her soul and suffered an euphoriagasm.
A heartbeat of experiencing raw, unadulterated, true love—what was truly possible between the right pairing of individuals. It wasn’t that Aphrodite loved me in such a way—I could tell that by her shared surprise—it was that I had unintentionally glimpsed the source of her godly power. Her silent, shaky reaction also told me that it was not something that should ever be discussed. That I was never to voice what I’d just glimpsed within her—which was ironic, given how open she was about flaunting her nudity.
Her naked soul, apparently, was an entirely different matter. As was proper.
Coupled with the dizziness of my ichor dagger evaporating, I was a physical and emotional wreck. I fell to her side, still pressed up against her. I wrapped my arm across her body at the diagonal, gripping her opposite hip and pulling her close. She reached out to rest a palm on my cheek, humming a private song that had probably remained secret for thousands of years, and…
I began to cry, softly, out of sheer exhaustion and frustration, feeling the weight of the world bearing down upon my shoulders. All the days of torture that I had buried deep within. All the fear I had smothered to appear strong against Ares and Apollo. To look strong for Carl.
She let me, comforting me with her loving hum and gentle strokes. “It’s okay, Wylde,” she cooed, using my Fae name in a familiar way. “I know it hurts. But you have survived the deepest stab. Now, you may begin to heal. I will kiss your pains away until you are restored. You will be stronger for this. I swear it, my lamb.”
“I don’t understand, Mary,” I rasped.
“Who is Mary?” she asked softly, sounding alarmed. “I haven’t heard you mention her before, but there is something about Mary—”
My sudden laughter cut her off, and served to instantly dry up my tears. I tried not to think about the movie, biting down my unbidden giggle. “Slip of the tongue,” I reassured her. “You called me lamb, so my mind went to the nursery rhyme.”
She was silent for a moment. “You…are lying next to the goddess of sex, and you’re thinking of nursery rhymes?” she asked in a dangerous tone. “Perhaps I have been too careful with you. Perhaps I will grab the tantric gauntlets after all—”
I laughed heartily, shaking my head. “Oh, you did fine. I apologize. No need for the sex toys.” She relaxed under my embrace and I let out a sigh of relief. “How can something so…irrelevant as my love life matter right now? When I’m Zeus’ hostage and the fucking world rests on my shoulders—allegedly. Why cry over a woman I thought I loved? A woman who does not love me? It’s all…so fucking stupid,” I muttered, exasperated.
Aphrodite growled unhappily, her body quivering beneath my arms like a warning grumble from a cat after three tummy rubs. “Do not forget with whom you talk. Love is not irrelevant,” she hissed. “It is the most important thing. The fact that you do not know this is the very reason for my existence as the goddess of love. It is proof that we Olympians have not done our jobs in many years.” She sounded furious at this admitted failure. “Men used to know the value of love. As did women. It is why all great stories revolved around a kernel of love: the Trojan War, Romeo and Juliet, and thousands more. The absence of love leads to such atrocities as Hitler.”
I stiffened, turning to look at her in hopes she was joking. She wasn’t. “You…um, you can’t say things like that. Hitler had at least one or two other major character flaws,” I said, deadpan.
She clenched her jaw, stubbornly. “The carnage devoured him heart and soul. Hate consumed all love in his soul. That is the war I fight every day. I battle the carnage.”
I pulled her close so that her back was pressed up against my entire length, and I buried my face into her neck, wanting to douse her quivering fury. “Carnage is hate?” I whispered.
She let out a frustrated sigh, slowly melting into my embrace. “Carnage is what happens when life loses love. It can take many forms—it is not one simple thing like hatred. That is merely one of many possible symptoms. Such as becoming a monster, a tyrant, a murderer, or dozens of others. Carnage manifests in different ways depending on the power of the life suffering it.”
I shuddered. I…had a lot of power at my disposal. What would carnage do to me?
15
Was that why she was so adamant about breaking my heart with the Callie revelation? Because she knew the potential danger it would lead to if she didn’t? “I’m sorry. It’s just not something that was on my mind. Mary,” I added with a grin.
She gave my bicep an angry slap and I burst out laughing. She growled, tugging my arm closer to her body and draping her o
wn arms over it as if to keep me there. “Because your mind had already discovered the true answer to your heart’s desire—you just refused to listen or acknowledge it. Why you refused to listen to your inner self is what I will help you learn. Those lessons can be as pleasurable or painful as you prefer,” she said, kneading her fingers into my forearms in a sensual, massaging manner. Like a cat’s paws.
Silence stretched between us, the only sound the crackling fires from the braziers. Her breathing began to slow, and I felt my eyelids growing heavy. I blinked rapidly, realizing that we were falling asleep. And just like that, I was suddenly hyperaware of the fact that her breasts were pressed up against my upper arm.
Boobs. I’d been bewitched by godly boobies.
She chuckled in amusement, sensing me tensing. “Ah, men. So predictable,” she said, nudging me with her hip to indicate she’d sensed something else entirely.
I stammered awkwardly as I pulled my arm away and sat up. I cleared my throat, staring down at the Titan Thorns on my wrists. I was one step—and a pair of blue balls—closer to removing them. It didn’t feel like a victory. It felt like battered kidneys and sorrow.
Despite my sudden discomfort over embracing Aphrodite so forwardly, I found that I didn’t hold a shred of concern that I was almost entirely naked. It just didn’t seem important. “Why do you care so much about this?” I asked her. “It can’t be all about me. If you hate Zeus that much, just leave. You don’t need anything from me.”
Aphrodite sat up and studied me cautiously, made uneasy by my question—scared that her answer would put her in great danger. That this beautiful, confident, caring woman…had serious trust issues, should have been obvious to me. Her father was a real peach.
“My reasoning will become apparent in time. Perhaps I wanted to teach the most important man in the world about his most important muscle.” I smirked and she rolled her eyes. “His heart, you fool,” she said with a resigned sigh. “That would be an achievement the goddess of love would be interested in.” I waited, my look letting her know that I hadn’t been taken by her lack of answer. She took a deep breath—and a big risk. “Who I am in the bedroom is not always the same woman I am in public,” she said, meaningfully.
I smiled. “You’re a freak in the sheets but a lady in the streets.”
She gave me a hollow smile, and I knew she was beyond concerned. “I must wear the toga I’ve been dealt. Reputations can be the safest armor. The best disguise is often to cloak yourself in your own legend. To let people fill in the gaps between your actions with well-known, historically consistent, motivations.”
The look in her eyes told me that she was trying to warn me about what I might see during our next encounter—that she would maintain her enemy guise if we were in public. That her very life might depend on it. Zeus would not approve of our real bedtime shenanigans. Got it.
Aphrodite, the goddess of sex, had figuratively rolled over the next morning and told me that she’d had fun but that this never happened. Which…was an entirely new experience for me.
I stared down at my current state of undress. “This will raise questions. There are areas of my body where I would rather not get a sunburn the next time I hang out with Apollo.”
She smiled uneasily. “Your clothing has already been sewn up.” She pointed at a nearby pile of clothes, neatly folded if not clean. I saw no rips or tears from her deft fingers.
“What if you are Zeus’ target?” I asked, softly. “Or what if he means to use me against you?”
She sighed. “You will do as you always do—make up your own mind, befuddle everyone in the process. Whether you kill me or not is a moot point. As long as my lessons are successful, I could die a happy goddess. I would not hold it against you.” She paused, tapping her lips thoughtfully. “The particulars of our bedroom lessons should remain a secret.” I felt uneasy with her sudden change of tone. “If the truth becomes known, I guarantee that I will be dead before I have a chance to utter a word.” My blood chilled. Zeus would kill her. Period. Wow. “You will die with your lessons incomplete. The world would suffer for it. My death would be a relief compared to what price everyone else would pay.”
I frowned uneasily. She didn’t seem to care one way or another about herself. She seemed more concerned about the impact on me and the world than her own life. Love truly was selfless.
She glanced at my Titan Thorns, and took a deep, seemingly nervous breath. “I can get you out of here,” she whispered in a rush.
I stared at her for about two solid seconds. “What?” I hissed.
She nodded. “I can break you free of the chains and get you out of here, but I cannot remove the Titan Thorns.”
“Why didn’t you say something sooner?” I demanded.
“I needed to know you were worth the price I will pay for betraying Zeus. If you clung stubbornly to denial over Callie, my sacrifice would have been for nothing. I hadn’t been certain how long it would take to bring you to that precipice. I anticipated three visits, but I am now certain that you are ready.”
I looked over at her, sensing the fear in her voice. So, her ulterior motive had been…her own safety. “You’re a prisoner as well.”
She nodded. “We are all prisoners here,” she said in a haunted tone. She straightened her shoulders, seeming to gather her resolve. “But he was correct regarding the Titan Thorns. Only his permission—or true, unconditional love—will unlock them. Which is why, even if you escape, our lessons must continue. Or it will all have been for nothing. My death will have been in vain.”
I studied the goddess warily, my mind racing with sudden plans. “How would these lessons help me? Exactly? How will more of this torture serve to bring me closer to an answer? Because, to be very honest, I’m not sure I’ve ever felt this frustrated—mentally and physically—with a naked woman sitting beside me.”
She smirked, beaming with pride. “Or this good, right?”
I considered that, and finally nodded with a resigned sigh. “Yeah. I guess so.”
“My lessons will harden you against temptation and seduction. I will bring your subconscious out from within by making you fight your own bodily desire—the part of you that wants nothing more than to fuck me like an animal.” I realized I was clenching the sheets in my fist and shakily let them go. “This will help you learn the name of the woman you love. It will let you unearth what you have hidden from yourself. It will let you find your eagle.”
I was breathing heavily. “Couldn’t you just tell me?”
She shook her head vehemently. “No. This must come from your own heart or it will be stained with suspicion—that you only love this person because you were led by the nose.”
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. I knew she was right, but this was ridiculous. “If I can’t take off the Titan Thorns, I can’t use my powers.”
She nodded. “Correct.”
“But I still have to stop Zeus from doing whatever he’s trying to do.”
“That is imperative,” she said, wincing.
“And on top of Zeus’ power play, I have a Cinderella story on my plate. To find my Princess Charming so I’m not consumed by the Wicked Queen Carnage.”
She nodded, looking amused. “You have already met your Princess Charming. Now you are hoping she finds your glass slipper, or that you find hers, I guess,” she said with an amused grin. “Zeus and my siblings could fill in the roles for the evil stepmother and stepsisters,” she added, chuckling. I didn’t point out that she was part of that crew. Her humor faded at the seriousness of the situation. “I can help you with your heart—your fairy tale—but the rest is on you.”
I nodded wearily. “How can I be certain that this—you—isn’t all part of Zeus’ plan?”
She shot me a cool look. “You are too clever,” she said, dryly. “Zeus’ ultimate plan is to hold you hostage by setting me up to suicidally free you.” I winced at her frosty tone. “The moment you leave, I must also leave—and hope that you find
a way to beat him—or he will kill me.” I’d killed the romance like a snuffed candle. “Don’t make me regret it.”
I bowed my chin. “I had to ask.”
She nodded regrettably. “I know.”
“Thank you, Aphrodite. And I’m sorry. I’ll do my best.”
My mind raced with plans and schemes, taking into account the dangers Aphrodite was about to face. First Hermes taking my bet, and now Aphrodite offering to break me out. And neither seemed aware of the other. I didn’t have high hopes that Ares and Apollo would be equally friendly, but I could still sow some seeds of chaos.
“What about Hephaestus?” I asked, thoughtfully. “Aren’t you sentencing him to death by doing this? Do you truly love Ares that much? Or despise Hephaestus that much?”
She growled, shaking her head. “I lied earlier, when I spoke of my husband,” she said, a faint smile curling the corners of her lips. “I am doing this for Hephaestus. I sleep with Ares to protect mankind from war—and to make everyone think I don’t care about my husband. Otherwise, they would use him as leverage against me. Hephaestus is enslaved much as you are.”
I blinked, somewhat surprised to hear he was a prisoner as well. “So, why help me if it gives away your position? Hephaestus will be punished. Zeus will know it was your fault, right?”
Aphrodite nodded grimly. “I will have to flee, of course. And hope that I can help teach you to hear the beatings of your heart faster than Zeus’ beatings strike Hephaestus. Only then will you be free to stand up to Zeus and possibly save my husband and me.” Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. “You also look after someone who is very important to my husband. Someone the world—and Zeus—fears. You do this even though you do not need to do so.”
I frowned. Then it hit me. “Pandora?” I whispered incredulously, remembering that Hephaestus had supposedly made her. The task had been forced upon him by Zeus as punishment to mankind for…
Carnage: Nate Temple Series Book 14 Page 11