“Your stuff…?”
Rae shrugged her shoulders. “When he started talking numbers, I felt my clit turn and wiggle into my body, crying its eyes out.”
I snorted and laughed. “Your poor clit.”
As I said that, the elevator doors opened.
Two men saw me and heard me.
Sasha elbowed me.
Be professional.
I rolled my eyes and smiled.
The two men got off the elevator and the four of us got on.
Sasha hit the button for the fourth floor.
I looked at Rae.
She curled her lip and rocked her head back and forth.
We were both thinking the same thing.
Could someone survive the fall from a fourth story window?
* * *
We sang a melody of songs for a guy named Hank who was retiring. It was some marketing firm and as we stood at the front of the conference room singing, the more we sang, the more people filled the room. Everyone had their phone out. Hank smiled the entire time.
Then he gave a quick speech, cried a little, and that was the end of that.
The company party ensued and Jess, Rae, and I slipped away.
Sasha did her usual flaunting and flirting for a few extra minutes.
Then we were able to leave.
As we approached the elevators to get out of there, I saw a man standing in a suit with his arms crossed. Looking right at me. Like he was waiting for me.
My heart jumped into my throat.
I tried to be as casual as I could as I stabbed my finger at the elevator button over and over.
I knew it wasn’t going to make the elevator move faster, but still…
“Whoa, whoa,” Rae said to me. “Where’s the fire?”
I looked back at the man in the suit.
“Nowhere,” I said.
Rae glanced back.
“Ah,” she said.
“Stop,” I said. “I just want to get out of here. That was our last event for the day. I need a drink.”
“I bet he would buy you one,” Rae said.
“Not a chance,” I said.
“Here he comes, Abby,” Rae said.
I looked back again.
Shit.
The elevator dinged and the doors slowly opened.
Rae then made a really stupid move.
She grabbed my phone and tossed it away from the elevator.
I gasped.
“You’ll thank me later,” she said.
She hooked her arms with Sasha and Jess and the three went into the elevator.
I had to go get my phone off the floor.
And that meant watching the elevator doors shut.
By the time I got back to the button and pressed it, it was too late.
I had to wait for the next one.
And the man in the suit was just a few feet from me.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen this kind of attire around here before,” he said.
I looked down at my clothes. “This old thing? Found it in my closet this morning.”
He laughed. “You have a great voice.”
“Oh?” I asked.
My hand stayed near the elevator button. Every few seconds I pressed the button.
“I heard your voice out of the four,” he said. “You really command the room.”
“Right. Thanks.”
“I’m not trying to hit on you,” he said.
“Oh. That’s good.”
“It is?” he asked. “Are you rushing home to your boyfriend? Fiancé? Husband? Lover?”
I crunched my eyebrows together. “That’s kind of personal.”
The man smiled and rubbed his forehead. “Sorry. Look, I’ll be honest. I’m always on the lookout for great voices. I don’t work with that marketing company. I’m independent. I handle commercials, voiceovers… and, yes, I might have another reason to talk to you…”
Every muscle in my body locked tight.
No, no, no, no… not here… not right now… not like this…
My eyes moved around, looking for cameras.
If there were cameras then that meant nothing-
“I think you’re beautiful,” he said to me.
“What?” I asked.
“You’re beautiful,” he said. “Even with that attire. So I have to see you in something else. Or nothing at all…”
I forced a smile and the elevator next to us opened.
“I have to go,” I said. “Thanks for the offer. I’m under contract. In more than one way.”
I dove into the elevator and the doors started to shut.
When I got down to the lobby, Rae was waiting for me.
She opened her arms. “Well…?”
“I’m going to throw you out of a window,” I said.
“For what?”
“Are you kidding me? That sleaze ball?”
“What happened?”
“Oh, come on,” I said. “He tried to tell me he looks for talent. Then, that I was beautiful in these clothes, so to him I would be even more beautiful in something else… or naked.”
“So he gets to the point,” Rae said. “You could use that.”
“Excuse me?”
“You can’t just give some good-looking guy the time of day?” Rae asked.
We walked to the front door of the building.
“That’s my decision to make,” I said.
“You need to enjoy yourself once in a while, Abby,” she said. “Get out there. Have some fun. You take this gig way too seriously.”
“And you just tell people you sing in an all-woman quartet?”
“No,” Rae said. “I tell them I’m a singer. That’s it. Just like your talent guy upstairs. Who knows what he actually does.”
“So everyone just lies to each other to have sex?”
“If it gets the job done…”
“What if the guy up there is really an architect?” I asked with a grin.
Rae grabbed my shoulder. “Then I feel bad for your clit if he starts talking about math.”
“What’s wrong with Abby’s clit?” Sasha asked.
“There’s nothing wrong with my…” I shook my head.
“It’s got dust on it,” Jess chimed in as she smoked a cigarette.
“What?” I yelled.
Jess nodded to me. “You know I’m right.”
“See?” Rae asked.
“I quit the group,” I said.
“You can’t quit,” Sasha said. “Valerie would kick you out of the apartment.”
True.
“Whatever,” I said. “Are we done here?”
“Yeah,” Sasha said. “I’m going to rush home and get changed. I have a meeting tonight. Trying to line up some gigs. For us. And for myself.”
“I’m going home to sleep,” Rae said. “I’m taking some sleeping meds and I’m done.”
“Big plans,” I said.
“And what are your plans?” Rae asked.
“I don’t know yet,” I said.
“Have a smoke with me,” Jess said. “It’ll give you that sexy, raspy voice.”
“I’m good,” I said.
Jess winked at me.
Out of the entire group, Jess was the only one who knew a little of my past.
When I was kind of a rock star myself.
“Okay, I’m out then,” Jess said. She flicked her cigarette to the curb. “See you all later. Or never. Whatever works.”
“I’m gone too,” Rae said.
Soon it was down to me and Sasha.
I was always jealous of her tanned skin, her bright blue eyes and the freckles on her cheeks. And when she let her hair down, it was kind of curly. She looked straight out a magazine for surfers. A surfer chick… who couldn’t surf.
“You should come to Ungro,” Sasha said to me. “I know you’re not into all of this…”
“I am,” I said. “Believe me, I am. I love singing, Sasha.”
“I know you do. You’re really g
ood. You’re better than all of us.”
“I think we’re all amazing,” I said. “We should just do something on our own. On the side.”
“We will,” Sasha said. “But seriously think about Ungro.”
I nodded.
Sasha’s phone started to ring, which ended our conversation and time together.
She walked away.
I turned to face the street.
I looked around at the busy city. The suits and ties looking for their big deal. Or steal. Then the artists. Dressed messy, living the same, some poor as anything, others with more money than they’d ever spend.
In such a big city, it was nice to be able to hide.
And for me, hiding was a good thing.
* * *
I met Valerie through an ad in the paper.
Well, that was only partially true.
She ran an ad in the paper looking for a roommate and then she put a copy of that ad on a cork board at a store.
I saw it, called the number, then I had a place to live.
Valerie was twenty years older than me and had no problem trying to slip into a motherly role in my life.
Which I didn’t need.
I had a mother.
She lived in Arizona.
And while she did support me, there was always a tone of disappointment when I talked to her. My brother Joe went to law school and worked in Arizona, so he was not only successful, he had money, and had also stayed local.
With Valerie, she loved to preach and give advice that I didn’t want or need.
I listened and brushed it all off.
The only good thing about Valerie was that she spent her entire career teaching music so she was all for me becoming a famous singer.
She was retired though.
And that meant she sat around the apartment and stuck her nose in everyone’s business.
All the time.
Each day when I got to the apartment I would stand at the door and take a deep breath before going inside.
I opened the door and walked through the foyer area in peace.
The apartment was actually really nice.
It had an old feel to it with more rooms than I thought an apartment would have.
It even had a second floor.
It was a strange setup, but it fit Valerie’s personality and fit my life.
I heard Valerie’s feet hitting the steps as she came rushing down.
I didn’t even make it to the kitchen to get a drink before she was right there to greet me.
“How was your day?”
“Great,” I said.
“Really?”
“Yeah. It was a great day.”
“Anything big happen?”
“No,” I said.
“You look tired,” she said.
“I am. It was busy.”
“But great.”
I stared at her. She had salt and pepper hair that was always pulled back. I had never once seen Valerie with her hair down. And every morning she did her makeup like she had a full day of things to do. She had big, brown eyes and a bit of a big nose. She had no problem picking on herself either, which I kind of didn’t go for. I wondered if her being single was part of that. Not that I was innocent of ever doing the same, but Valerie was a good person with a big heart.
Really, Abby? This is what’s on your mind right now?
“Oh, before I forget, someone called for you,” Valerie said.
“Called for me? Here?”
“Yeah. I took down her name and number.”
Her?
Valerie was also one of the last people in the world to pay for a landline. She had a cellphone but believed it was emitting dangerous stuff into the air and into our brains.
I didn’t bother arguing with her over that.
“I’m hoping it’s a gig for you,” Valerie said. “How exciting, right?”
“Yeah,” I said. “I better call back.”
I walked to the table and looked at the piece of paper.
Clementine.
That was the name.
I didn’t know a Clementine.
I took the piece of paper and went to my room.
I needed a shower. I needed food. I needed a drink.
But first, I needed to call Clementine.
I dialed the number on my cell.
“Hello?” a woman’s voice asked after the second ring.
“Clementine?” I asked.
“Yes… who is this?”
“It’s Abby…”
“Please hold,” she said.
Hold?
A second later I heard the sound of laughter.
A deep voice laughing…
I hung up the phone.
“Fuck,” I whispered.
I turned and looked at my closet.
Panic set in hard.
Really hard.
I ran to my closet and packed a bag.
I threw out Clementine’s number and hurried out of my room.
As I passed through the apartment, I called out, “I have somewhere to go, Valerie. I’ll be back tomorrow.”
“A gig?” she asked. “An audition?”
“Yes,” I said.
“Good luck.”
When I left the apartment, I ran to my car.
My heart slammed inside my chest.
I looked around as I got into the car.
The entire time I drove, I checked the mirrors.
I did my best to convince myself to calm down, but there was no calming down.
I should have been used to it by now.
It was the same old thing… happened from time to time…
There was only one place I could go.
Jess didn’t live in the nicest part of the city, but not many actually did.
I parked outside her building and hoped my car would survive overnight.
It was a risk worth taking.
I pressed the buzzer over and over for Jess’s apartment.
She was on the second floor.
There was no answer.
I ran out of the building and texted her.
Outside ur building - answer me
I looked up to her apartment and she opened the window a few seconds later.
“It’s broken,” she called down to me.
I had my bag over my shoulder. “I need a place to crash tonight.”
“Sure thing,” she yelled.
I went back into the building and up to her apartment.
Jess had the door open and stood in the doorway with her arms crossed.
“Did it happen again?” she asked me.
“Yeah,” I said.
“Shit,” she said. “Just stay here for the night. Or as long as you need.”
“Thank you,” I said.
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “Just as long as me or Valerie don’t end up hurt.”
“Please don’t ever say that again,” I said.
I went into her apartment and felt like I could cry.
My past would never leave me alone.
And truthfully… it was all Reed’s fault.
3
REED
“Okay, let’s get this shot right here… we’ve got a police helicopter coming over… this is good stuff, guys.”
Guys.
I shook my head.
Some fucking skinny dude with a big camera, calling us guys.
Like we were best friends.
There was an entire crew on top of the roof with us.
The skinny dude taking pictures.
A woman filming us.
A sound guy.
Another woman who handled the lighting.
Then, of course, there was Toby.
Standing in the back of it all, arms crossed, looking like he knew what he was doing back there.
Maybe he did know what was going on.
Maybe not.
We all sat on old chairs and flipped over metal drums, giving us the look that we were just
some gritty, street band trying to make things happen.
This was all for a promo shoot and interview.
Another little poke from the record company to keep our exposure up.
This was going to be printed everywhere though.
And everywhere online too.
I sat with my bass and slapped my right hand down to the strings, my left hand running through some old FILTHY LINE riffs. I worked on some new ones too.
Dex and Jay were next to each other, guitars in hand, jamming out.
Sab sat in a piece of shit recliner with chunks of yellow cushion pushing out of the ripped cloth like a cut wound. He had his right foot up on the arm of the chair, knee sticking through his ripped jeans, drumsticks in hand, staring up at the sky with a grin on his face.
That was fitting for him.
Always living in the fucking clouds.
Dreaming of that someone who would fucking tear him apart and probably ruin the band.
Nash sat on a tall stool, hands around a mic stand, pulling it toward his shoulder, staring forward.
“Let’s get this done,” the camera dude yelled.
The camera clicked two thousand times.
The woman filmed us, walking around, getting all the angles.
It was weird to just sit there like that.
Knowing that in the editing stage, they’d throw our songs in the background of it all.
The police helicopter flew overhead.
“That was fucking perfect,” the camera guy yelled. “Fuck yes. Fucking perfect.”
He scurried back to Toby to show him what he had gotten shots of.
I stood up and turned to face the woman with the camera, filming us.
“That thing still on?” I asked her.
“Maybe,” she said. She looked at me. Her eyes were almost honey color. She smirked. “Anything you want to say to the world?”
I put my hand out and covered the lens. “How about you and I do something worth filming? I’ll make you the richest groupie by the end of the week.”
She held up her left hand to show off a nice, big diamond.
I laughed.
I nodded to the camera guy. “Him?”
“No,” she said. “Never him.”
“You think a diamond ring is going to stop me, honey?” I asked.
“It’s going to stop me,” she said.
She turned off the camera.
“Commitments are like fast food… the idea is great. Fun to do. But then a few hours later your stomach starts bothering you. Next thing you know, you realize the food was just a rental… you know?”
A FILTHY Enemy: a filthy line novel Page 2