The Homesteader: A Novel

by Oscar Micheaux

  CHAPTER XV

  "LOVE YOU--GOD, I HATE YOU!"

  The play they witnessed that afternoon was an emotional play, and in adegree it sufficed to arouse the emotion in all three. The meetingbetween Orlean and her husband had been without excitement. As if shehad been expecting him, she welcomed him, and they had proceededdirectly to a play at the Studebaker Theater downtown.

  When they were again in the street, they went to another theater wherethey purchased tickets to witness Robert Mantell in Richelieu. And,later, taking a surface car on State Street, proceeded to a restaurantnear Thirty-first Street where they had supper, after which they retiredto the home of Mrs. Merley.

  Of course that one left them to themselves in due time, and in a fewminutes they were engaged in congenial conversation. After a time Jeancaught her hand, and despite the slight protest she made, he succeededin drawing her up on his knee.

  "I ought not to sit here," she said.

  "Why not, Orlean?" he said kindly, placing his arm about her waistfondly.

  "Because."

  "Because what, dear?"

  She looked at him quickly. He met her eyes appealingly. She looked away,and then down at her toes.

  "How you have fleshened," he commented.

  "Do you think so?" she returned, inclined to be sociable.

  "It is quite noticeable. And you are better looking when you are so."

  "Oh, you flatter me," she chimed.

  "I would like to flatter my wife."

  She did not reply to this. She appeared to be comfortable, and he wenton.

  "Don't you know that I have longed to see you, and that it has not beenjust right that I could not?"

  And still she made no answer.

  "I never want to live so again. I want you always, Orlean."

  "When did you leave home?" she asked now.

  "A couple of days ago."

  "And how long have you been here?"

  "I came yesterday afternoon."

  "And when to Mrs. Merley's?"

  "This morning."

  She was thoughtful then. Indeed they were getting along better than hehad hoped. There remained but one thing more. If he could persuade herto stay the night at Mrs. Merley's and not insist on going home. If hecould keep her out of her father's sight until morning, he would have nomore worry. That, indeed, was his one point of uneasiness. Keeping herout of her father's sight. He recalled how he had refrained from buyinga revolver when he left home. It would not have been safe after all thathad passed between himself and her father for him to have anything ofthe kind about, and he was glad now that he had been sensible.

  He drew his wife's head down, turned her face to his, and kissed herlips. He caught the sigh that passed her lips. He saw her eyebrowsbegin to contract. What was passing in her mind? Duty? Then, to whom?

  He kissed her again, and caressed her fondly. This meant much to him. Hetold her so then, too.

  "It has been very hard on me, wife, for you to have stayed away a wholeyear. Awfully hard. It was never my plans or intention for such to be."He was full up now. He wanted to talk a long time with her. If theycould just retire and talk far into the night as they had done in theeleven months that had been theirs.

  His confidence was growing. All that was expedient now, he felt sure,was to keep the Reverend out of it until morning. By that time nofurther effort on his part would be necessary.

  "Do you love me, Orlean?" he said now, drawing her face close to hisagain.

  She made no reply audibly, but she seemed to be struggling withsomething within herself. In truth she did not want to say that she did,and she _would not_ tell him she did not. She let her arm unconsciouslyencircle his neck. Her hand found his head and stroked his hair, whileshe was mentally meditative.

  In the meantime, his head rested against her breast, and he could hearthe beating of her heart.

  "Oh, my wife," he cried, intended for himself but she heard it. Itaroused her, her emotion began to assert itself. How long would it takefor her to be his mate again at this rate?

  "How is everything back home?" she asked, as if seeking a change. Hehesitated. She looked down into his face to see why he did not answerdirectly. He caught her eyes, and she could see that he was not wishingto tell her something.

  "What is the matter, Jean?" she asked now, slightly excited and anxious.

  "Oh, nothing," he replied. He wanted to tell her the truth, all thetruth, but it was not yet time he feared. Until she had given up to him,he decided to withhold anything serious.

  "There is _something_, Jean, of that I am sure," she insisted, shiftingwhere she could see his face more clearly.

  "If there is anything, wife, I would discuss it later. Now,--I can thinkof but one thing, and that is you," whereupon he caressed her againfondly. She sighed then and her emotion was becoming more perceptible.

  "You are going back home with me tomorrow, dear?" he dared to saypresently.

  For answer she shifted uneasily, and then her eyes espied the clock onthe wall. It was five-thirty.

  "I think I should call up home," she said thoughtfully. He caught hisbreath, and trembled perceptibly. She regarded him inquiringly.

  And here again we must remark about Jean Baptiste. In the year ofmisery, of agony and suffering in general he had endured, he had settledupon one theory. And that was that if he and his wife were to ever livetogether again and be happy, the family were to be kept out of it.Perhaps if this could have been forgotten by him in this moment, wewould not have had this story to tell; but when she mentioned her folks,all that he had wished to avoid--all that he felt he _must_ avoid, camebefore him. As he saw it now, if she called her father, they would_never_ live together again. He was nervous when he anticipated thefact. He started, and took on unconsciously a fearsome expression.

  "Please don't, Orlean," he said, beseechingly.

  "Don't what?" she asked, apprehensive of something she did not like.

  "Call your father," he said. He wanted to tell her that if she calledher father, it would mean the end of everything for them, but hewithheld this.

  "Now, I wish him to know where I am," she said, protestingly, and arosefrom his knee. She stood away from where he sat hesitatingly. In thatmoment, she was not aware that she stood between duty and subservience.As she saw it, she forgot from her training that there _was_ a duty, sheonly remembered that she was obedient. Obedient to the father who hadreared her so to be.

  It was the psychological moment in their union. Near her the husbandthat she had taken, regarded her uneasily. He had come to her to do theduty that was his to do. They were estranged because of one thing, andone thing only, and that was her father, the man her husband would neveryield to. And as she hesitated between obedience to one and duty towardthe other, her life, her love and future was in the balance.

  Which?

  "Orlean," she heard now, from the lips of her husband. "Listen, _beforeyou go to the phone_." He became suddenly calm as he said this. "Imarried you two years gone now, for better or for worse, and 'untildeath do us part.' That was the vow that I took and also you. I've donemy best by you under the circumstances. I gave you a home and bed thatyou left. I gave you my love, and am willing to give you my life if thatbe necessary. But, Orlean, I didn't contract to observe the ideas and besubservient to the opinion of others. To force me to regard this is todo me a grave injustice. You cannot imagine, appreciate, maybe, howhumiliating it is to be placed in such a position. I cannot explain itwith you standing impatiently before me as you are. I have come here totry and have you discuss this matter with me from a practical point ofview. Surely, having taken me as your God-given mate, you owe me that.You force me to honor and respect certain persons--"

  "Don't you," she cried. "Don't you insinuate my father!" She advancedtoward him threateningly in her excitement, and all sense of duty wasgone. Only obedience to the one who had made it so remained. That sheshould rally to the support of his adversary, displaced his composure.He had hoped to have her re
ason it out with him, and he had prayed thathe be given a little time, and then all would be well. He was aware thatshe was unequal to a woman's task. Not one woman in a thousand he knewwould place a father before a husband; but his wife was different. Shehad been trained to be devoutly subservient to her father. For thatreason he was willing to be patient--he had been patient. But at thesame time he had suffered much, and her love and obedience to his worstenemy--even if it was her father, unfitted him for that with which hewas now confronted. He was fast losing his composure, likewise hispatience. Nothing in the world should stand between him and his wife. Hebecame excited now, but calmed long enough to say:

  "Go ahead, or come to me. There are two things a woman cannot be at thesame time," and he waved his hand toward her resolutely. "A wife to theman she has married, and a daughter to her father." With this statementhe sank back into the chair from which he had partly risen. He had saidthe last statement with such forceful logic, that it made her stop,pause uneasily, and then suddenly she straightened and turning, went tothe telephone. But when she called over the wire to her father, all thecomposure that Jean Baptiste ever had left him. All the suffering andagony that he had experienced from the hand of the other asserteditself. He arose from the chair and came toward her. His eyes werebloodshot, his attitude was threatening. She called to her father, andthe words she said were:

  "Yes, papa.... Is this you.... Yes.... I am at Mrs. Merley's....And--ah--papa," she hesitated and her voice broke from fear."Ah--papa--a--Jean is here, papa.... Yes, Jean. He is here." She wastrembling now, and the man standing behind her saw it. He saw herpassing out of his life forever, and desperation overtook him. In thatmoment something within him seemed to snap.

  He reached over her shoulder and grasped the receiver and pushed herroughly aside. The next instant she was protesting wildly, while Mrs.Merley was brought to the front by his loud voice screaming over the'phone.

  "_Hell, hello, you!_" he cried savagely. "_Hello, I say!... How am I! MyGod, how could I be after what you have done to me, my life.... Whydidn't I come to the house?... Why should I come to your house, when thelast time I was there I was kicked out, virtually kicked out, do youhear?_"

  "You get away from here!" he heard in his ear, and turned to see hiswife gone wild with excitement. Her eyes were distraught, her attitudewas menacing, as she struggled at his arm to try and wrest the receiverfrom his hand. He heard the other saying something in his ear. He didnot understand it, he was too excited. Everything was in a whirl aroundhim. He became conscious that he had dropped the receiver after a time.He felt himself in contact with some one, and saw the face of his wife.In her excitement she was striking him; she was trying to do himinjury.

  He became alive to what was going on, then. The receiver hung suspended;he was in a grapple with his excited wife.

  "You--you!" she screamed. "You abuse my father, my poor father! You haveabused him ever since I knew you. You will not respect him, and thencome to ask me to live with you. You abuser! you devil! Do I love you?God, _I hate you_!"

  He made no effort to protect himself. He allowed her to strike him atwill and with a strength, born of excitement, she struck him in hisface, in his eyes, she scratched him, she abused him so furiously untilgradually he began to sink. He reached out and caught her around thewaist as he lost his footing and fell to his knees. As he lingered inthis position his face was upturned. She struck him then with all theforce in her body. He groaned, as he gradually loosened his hold uponher, and slowly sank to the floor. And all the while she fought him, shepunctuated her blows with words, some abusing him, others in defense ofher father.

  At last he lay upon the floor, while around her, Mrs. Merley and theother girl begged and beseeched. But she was as if gone insane. As helay with eyes closed and a slight groan escaping from his lips at herfeet, she suddenly raised her foot and kicked him viciously full in theface. This seemed, then, to make her more vicious, and thereupon shestarted to jump upon him with her feet, but Mrs. Merley suddenly caughther about the waist and drew her away.

  How long he lay there he did not know, but he opened his eyes when fromthe outside he heard hurried footsteps. He continued to lay as he was,and then somebody pulled the bell vigorously. Mrs. Merley went to it,opened it, and let some one in. He looked up through half closed eyes tosee the Reverend standing over him. In that instant he saw his wife dashpast him and fall into the other's arms. He heard her saying words oflove, while he was aware that the other pacified her with soft words.They took no notice of the man at their feet.

  And then he saw them open the door, while the others stood about in awe.While the door was open he caught a glimpse of the street outside--andof Glavis on the sidewalk below.

  The next instant the door closed softly behind them, and she went out ofhis life as a wife forever.