by S A Jacobs
Even more frustrating to me was the fact that I could still not feel any negative energy there. There was no emotion to help me paint the picture of what had taken place. It was an anomaly. I felt things everywhere I went, but there, like the Shack, there was a lack of energy. Unsure of what to do next, I cautiously walked back towards the shelter, past it, and toward the parking lot.
For the next fifteen minutes, I walked in silence. I didn’t hear or see anything. Then, the forest started to come back to life. Slowly, the sounds of birds chirping and animals running in the distance returned. I stopped to have a drink of water. I set my bag down and got out my water bottle. I looked around again for any sign of someone else on this trail but saw nothing. I was beginning to think that the whole firepit was another vision. I reached into my pocket to retrieve the charred cloth to confirm the reality of what I’d seen. It wasn’t there.
I put my water down and frantically went through my pockets. I emptied them all and found nothing but the items I typically carried. The cloth was gone, if it had even existed in the first place. My shoulders slumped as I took a deep breath. Defeated and confused, I put everything back in my pockets and strapped on my backpack once again. I stood there motionless for a moment, debating if I should continue to the parking lot or go back to the phantom fire pit.
If it wasn’t real, if it was a vision, what was it trying to show me? I racked my brain trying to answer the question but couldn’t. I knew visions always had a purpose. Their message may be hard to decipher, but it was always there. I could only feel that this was trying to tell me something about Zeke, but that almost felt too literal.
I continued thinking about it as I headed back toward the parking lot. After only a few steps, I heard the echo of someone else in the forest. The unmistakable sounds of twigs snapping and bending under each step. Someone was ahead of me on the trail, and they were close.
I froze. I resisted the urge to shout out. If it was Zeke, I wanted him to know I was there, but if it wasn’t, I didn’t want to draw any negative attention. Despite everything running through my head, I stood completely silent and unmoving. I crouched down to keep myself from being visible. I waited and watched.
The steps were slow and steady as they approached, and they did not waver. The only change was the volume, getting louder with each step as they drew closer. I took a deep breath. I was sure the person was upon me or would be in another couple steps. I squinted through the foliage. The first thing I was able to see was a hiking boot and an olive drab pair of pants.
I recognized it immediately. It was a uniform, a ranger uniform. Not wanting to raise suspicion, I stood up.
“Hey, who’s there?” I asked.
“US Forest Service. This trail is off-limits,” a gruff voice responded... a gruff voice I knew all too well.
“Gordon?”
“Who’s there? Step onto the trail where I can see you!”
I swallowed hard and timidly stepped out into the clearing of the trail. Gordon bore down with a look of contempt until he recognized me. His eyes widened but his frustration was still visible.
“David?” he asked removing his hat and wiping his forehead. “What the hell are you doing out here? You know better than to come down this trail.”
“Sorry, I just wanted to…uh...be here where he was and see what I could feel.”
“You mean like that ghost stuff you do on TV? Jesus, kid. You can’t be going down here. You have any idea how dangerous this trail can be?”
In that instant, I didn’t hear the voice of a forest ranger, I heard his feeble attempt at being a stand-in father for me after my dad was gone. “Dammit Gordon, I’m not a fucking kid. I can handle myself. Did you follow me here or something?”
“It’s not like that. I know you can handle yourself. It’s just this trail… you know… it just isn’t safe for anyone.”
“So you did follow me here, then!”
“No! I had no clue you were out here!”
I stood silent. The juvenile rage that had overtaken me was starting to fade, and I didn’t know what to say.
“Look,” Gordon said, “a deputy called in a report of a man going down here. I had to come check it out. I certainly didn’t expect you.”
“Sorry, I just felt I needed to be here, and I kinda go to another place in my head when I’m trying to feel something. You just caught me off guard.”
“I get it, but I gotta get you out of here. C’mon, let's get back to the Gap.”
I started to walk with him back down the trail. “Hey, aren’t you like the boss of the department? Shouldn’t one of the new rangers be checking out random people out here?”
He stopped walking and turned to face me. “This trail is...it's not right. I lost my best friend, your dad on this very trail. I’m not gonna risk losing anyone else. If a ranger needs to go down here, I’m the only one who will do it, on my command.”
“I get that. But it’s just a trail. You said it yourself the other day. Dad… well his liver failed. That would’ve happened here, on any other trail, or even at home. It just happened.”
He looked down at his feet and his shoulders slumped. “There is more to this trail than that. Your dad wanted it closed off for a reason. I may have not agreed with him or even understood why, but I knew him, and if he felt this trail wasn’t safe, I had to believe it. Years later, I came down here myself and stumbled on that old shelter. Apparently, it had become a local hangout for kids. All I could hear in my head was your dad’s voice saying it wasn’t a safe place. It became a bit of a personal project for me from that point forward.”
“Did you have any other issues out here?”
“No, nothing. It was just a thing I felt I had to do. Look, do me a favor. I know you’re just trying to feel all your ghost things back here. I get it. But you gotta leave this trail alone. Nothing has happened out here, but it’s closed down and it needs to stay that way. I gave you the key to the substation. I’m trying to help you, but you gotta do this for me. Okay?”
Gordon was lying. I knew, from the reports and his sudden change in demeanor, there was so much more to this story, but it was clear I was going to get nothing else from him. While part of me seethed with anger at his lies, I took a deep breath and just agreed with him. For now, I needed to get out of there and figure out how I could return without him.
We started heading back down the trail. With every step my anger became stronger. Just when I thought I would not be able to bite my tongue any longer, I heard a dog bark. I jumped at the sound and turned toward it. Ten yards behind us, a dirty, mangy dog stepped onto the path. He stood tall and stoic. He bared his teeth as if he was protecting his owner.
“David! What's gotten into you?” Gordon said as he grabbed my shoulder.
I turned to look at him. He was staring down the trail towards the dog. I turned back towards the dog but nothing was there. It was just the overgrown trail. I shook my head and looked again. There was nothing there.
Crossing paths with Gordon on this trail had overwhelmed my thoughts. His evasiveness and my attempt at understanding everything made Zeke completely slip my mind. Seeing that dog on the trail brought Zeke to the forefront. I returned my attention back at Gordon who appeared concerned.
“Jeez, I thought I heard something,” I said. “Just got spooked.”
“Let’s just get you out of here already. I hate this damn trail.”
“Wait!” I yelled. “We can’t go!”
Gordon rubbed his chin, looking at me with raised eyebrows.
“There is someone out there,” I said pointing down the trail. “It’s Melanie’s neighbor, Zeke. He took off looking for his dog. I saw his car parked at the entrance to this trail. I think he is down there somewhere.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes! I’m sure he went down there somewhere, but I didn’t see him. I just felt it.”
“Alright, you get the hell out of here. I’ll look for him.”
“I can
help.”
“No you can’t! You need to get out of here. I’ll call in some backup if I need it, but you need to be gone from this trail for good!”
14
I spent that night at home with Melanie. She had quickly moved from being my client to being my confidant and sounding board for this case. The only problem was that she was far more interested in how everything connected to her house than the greater story. Also, I was so enamored with her that it was difficult to focus on anything else.
After she left for work the next morning, I thought everything through. I realized I was headed in many different directions. I wanted to help Melanie, but I found myself focused more on my father. As much as I wanted to avoid consulting Linda again, I realized I needed some help. I drove out to the office and took a deep breath as I walked in.
Linda was meditating in the conference room. Her head jerked to the side to look at me, and a large smile appeared on her face. She was absolutely beaming when she stood up and hugged me. “I thought you would avoid talking to me as long as possible. I’m so glad you changed your mind. Please, come sit with me.”
I hesitantly sat down with her in the conference room.
“Go on, tell me what you’ve seen,” she prodded.
“My dad. This is apparently all about him. He had something to do with protecting the forest for the KGC. That’s how I’m connected to all this.”
She responded only with a nod, showing me she already knew.
“Look, I get it. My dad ties me into everything, but that doesn’t help me at all with Melanie and her house. I need to focus on that for now.”
“Your dad, Mel’s house, the forest… they are all the same thing. These are not separate cases.”
“I get it, but now I am down some wormhole trying to learn about my dad and not doing a damn thing for Melanie.”
“Be patient. Follow where the case leads you. You know this, David.” She paused and looked at me with a disappointed expression as she held out her hand. “Let me see it please.”
“See what?”
“I can feel it with you. What have you found? Please, let me see it.”
I knew exactly what she was referring to. The coin my father had given me. Linda had this gift to feel objects in the room even if they were out of sight. I’d seen her do it before with Kat. It was unnerving. I obediently reached into my pocket to retrieve the KGC coin and handed it to Linda. She held it tightly in her fist and closed her eyes. After a few seconds she began to nod as if she was listening to someone give her instructions. She opened her eyes and handed me the coin.
“What did you see?” I asked.
“You are lost, David.”
“No shit I’m lost. Why else would I be standing here asking for your help?”
“I saw nothing that you don’t already know. The trouble is, you know it yet you refuse to look. “
“You have anything to say that might be a little more helpful?”
“Tell me what you did over the last few days.”
“What I did? What do you mean?”
“Your days, where you went, what you did. Please. Walk me through it.”
“I went to the Ranger station, and then I stopped at my old house and picked up some stuff.”
“Your old house? What did you do there?”
“I told you. I just grabbed some of my dad’s old stuff and looked around a bit.”
“And what did you feel while you were inside?”
That question left me without a response. The truth was, I’d felt nothing, although I didn’t want to admit that to Linda. After an uncomfortable silence, she sighed and grabbed my shoulders.
“Listen to me, David. You are a very talented investigator and can uncover tremendous insights using that skill, but you didn’t set out to be a private investigator. Your investigative skills only bring true insight when you combine them with the gift you have to feel. Normally, you let your feelings guide your research. Now, you are ignoring your skill, ignoring what you sense. I don’t have any help for you beyond what you already know. Right now, you need to look inward and allow yourself to truly absorb everything.”
At that moment, I realized precisely what she had been trying to get me to understand this whole time, and I knew exactly what I needed to do next.
“Ahh, so you do understand,” she said as if she could actually see the synapses firing in my brain.
“I do. Thank you.”
I gave her a hug, then stepped back and looked at her.
“You think he’ll talk to me? I mean, I’m not like you.”
“He has always been speaking to you. You just never understood where the voice was coming from. It’s about time you have the conversation directly.”
I said bye to Linda, got in my truck, and drove back to the old sub-station where I’d grown up. I was going to talk to my dad.
I pulled off the road in front of my old house again. I approached the door, clearing my thoughts. I was there to contact my dad. I was unsure of what would happen. I had always been able to feel a presence or energy. However, communicating with a presence was something I’d rarely done, and when I did, it was reluctantly. This was my father. This was so different than anything else I’d done.
I thought about what I wanted to achieve. There were so many things I would have loved to talk to my dad about, but this was my one chance. I needed his help in understanding the case. As I approached the door, I tried to force all those thoughts out of my head so I could just let happen whatever was going to happen. I took in a deep breath as I unlocked the door and stepped in.
I was greeted by the loud clang of the grandfather clock finishing its hourly chime. I instinctively looked at my watch and realized it was 10:17 am. There would be no reason for the clock to be chiming then. I stepped into the living room and looked at it. It stood in the corner of the room, untouched and unmoving. A thick layer of dust covered its surface, and the pendulum sat still.
“Dad?” I spoke as my eyes darted around the room. “It’s me. I’m home now.”
I stood silently, waiting for some sort of response. When none came, I took a deep breath, approached the couch and sat down. I let my mind go back to my childhood growing up there. I remembered watching TV on that very couch. I started remembering the hours I’d spent playing The Legend of Zelda with my butt on those cushions. I brought my attention back to the present. Just then, the TV sprang to life showing a familiar episode of Boy Meets World. I stared at it for a moment, wondering what I was seeing. Then my gaze drifted to the clock. I saw him. My dad was standing there, fastidiously cleaning the grandfather clock and winding it. I started to remember that routine of his. Every week he would spend an hour messing with the clock.
“Hey, dad!” I yelled.
He stopped and turned his head to look at me.
“In a minute, David. I need to finish this.” He returned his attention to the clock.
His blowing me off like that was an experience I was very familiar with. I wasn’t sure if I was experiencing it or just reliving a memory. I continued to watch him. After he finished wiping down the exterior, he set down the rag and opened the front to wind the clock. I realized that, despite seeing that routine every week, I’d never really watched it. As he wound the clock, I noticed the clocks hands. According to the clock, it was precisely 11:27. I’d seen that time before. It was written in his desk. I wondered if this was a true vision or my manifestation from that. Then, I noticed something else. When he finished winding the clock, he closed a small compartment inside it. Then he re-set the clock according to his watch and started the pendulum. Finally, before shutting the glass door, he pulled something out of the inside of the clock and put it in his pocket.
As my mind started to focus on what my dad put in his pocket, the entire scene faded away. My dad was gone. The TV still sat covered in dust. The clock was silent.
“Dad, I’m still here. Talk to me.”
I could feel pangs of adolescent rag
e build up inside of me as it always did with my dad. At that moment, I felt like I had when I’d come home, proud of a grade, only to be ignored by my dad. He was all I had, but he was never really there, especially when it came to anything I cared about.
“You know, this is just like you! The moment something matters to me, and I need you, you aren’t there! You left me with nothing. Raised by mom’s sister who only made sure I was fed. And then there’s Gordon. You know that asshole can’t even speak honestly with me about anything? You know what? I’m done with this. I should have never come back here. The only damn thing I’ve learned is that you, the one person I should’ve been able to trust, were a part of an organization that did nothing but spread evil across the country.”
I stood up and pulled the coin from my pocket.
“The KGC. Do you know how many lives they destroyed to keep their way of life? And now I find out you were one of them!”
Tears streamed down my face. In a matter of moments, I’d unleashed every ounce of pain and frustration I’d bottled up since I was a kid. I pulled back my arm and threw the coin at the clock. The coin hit the glass pane on the door. I expected the glass to shatter, but it didn’t. The coin bounced off with a clang. It flipped in the air as it landed on the carpet in front of me. I fell to my knees and pounded my fists on the ground until I just couldn’t anymore. I raised my hands to my head and wiped my eyes. I tried to regain control over myself. When I looked up again, I saw Robert Mason.
The image only lasted an instant. By the time I stopped to rub my eyes and get a better look, it was gone. In that brief moment I understood what I was there to find. It wasn’t Robert. It was the clock. The clock that I’d grown up with, that my dad poured so much attention into, wasn’t his clock. It was the clock I had seen in Robert’s room in Cloudland.