The Amish Teacher's Dilemma and Healing Their Amish Hearts

by Patricia Davids

  “Aren’t you going to show me the barn?” she asked.

  He turned around and pointed. “Behold. The barn. See you tomorrow.”

  He could make a joke out of it, but he wasn’t laughing inside. He needed some distance between them. He needed to get his head straight and stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss the teacher.

  * * *

  Willis seemed in a big hurry to get away from her. Of course, she had no right to monopolize his time. It was simply that her world seemed empty when he wasn’t in it. Instead of going into the house she chose to walk to the small grocery store at the other end of the community. New Covenant wasn’t a true town. It was a string of Amish homes interspersed with a few Englisch ones along a narrow-paved road.

  At the grocery store she purchased an array of fresh vegetables and fruit. The prices were higher than what she was used to paying. Mr. Meriwether, the owner of the grocery, was a likable fellow who enjoyed visiting with his customers. As she was paying she noticed a small flyer on a bulletin board behind the cash register. It was for a cabinetmaker in Presque Isle, the largest city in Aroostook County. The phrase that caught her attention was “handmade cabinet pulls and knobs produced by local artisans.”

  “Mr. Meriwether, could I have that card?” She pointed out the one. “I’d like to write down their contact information.”

  He pulled the thumbtack out and handed the flyer to her. “The fellow’s name is Ray Jackson. He comes here once or twice a month. I can easily get another one.”

  “Thank you. Is he local?”

  Mr. Meriwether shook his head. “He’s from Portland. He owns a couple of stores there, and one in Presque Isle. He comes out to get wood from your bishop. The one who makes backyard sheds and those ridiculous little houses. Bishop Schultz gets his wood from an Amish fellow who runs his own sawmill.”

  “Thank you again.” She left the store and headed home. Perhaps Willis could sell his handmade cabinet knobs and pulls to this man. If he came to New Covenant monthly, Willis might not even have the expense of shipping his products to Presque Isle or Portland. She would suggest it. Perhaps the bishop could introduce the two. Feeling quite pleased with herself, Eva walked briskly all the way home.

  Her brother was sitting at the kitchen table with a glass of milk and a sandwich. She grinned at him. “A man who knows how to make his own supper is a welcome addition to any household. I think I may have found a place for Willis to sell some of his ironwork.”

  Danny had an odd expression on his face. He didn’t ask about her discovery. Instead, he held out an envelope. “You have a letter from Gene.”

  She put the brown paper bag with her groceries on the kitchen counter and took the letter from him. Was she being summoned home? She looked at Danny. “I don’t want to read it. I don’t want to go back to Illinois.”

  “I understand that but I’m not sure Gene will.”

  “Why? Why can’t my life come first for a change?”

  “I can tell you what he will say. Because we are commanded by our Lord to care for others. There isn’t a commandment to make thyself happy first.”

  “There should be. Is there anything else?”

  “A packet from a school in Maryland.”

  “Goot. Those must be the records for Otto and Harley.” She laid her brother’s letter on the counter. She picked it up and turned it over so she couldn’t see her brother’s handwriting. “I don’t have to read it right away.

  “I’m not going to be the one who tells you what to do. I can see how much you love—it here. I like it here.”

  She sat down at the kitchen table and clasped her hands together. “I appreciate that.”

  “So you found someplace for Willis to sell his ironwork?”

  She turned away from the letter and smiled. “I saw this flyer in the grocery store. It is for a cabinet-making business. They have hand-wrought hardware. It would be helpful to the family if Willis could sell items on a regular basis and not just when a horse throws a shoe or a potato digger has a broken nose.”

  “Potato diggers have noses?”

  “Sure.” She put her hands together in front of her face. “It’s the part that pushes into the ground underneath the potatoes and brings them up to the surface.”

  “Since when are you an expert on potato diggers?”

  “I read about them when I knew I was going to come to this part of Maine. The potato is their main agricultural crop, but I don’t want to talk about potatoes. I want to talk about finding a market for Willis’s skills.”

  “I grant you the man knows how to work metal. I was thinking of taking some of his pieces back to Illinois to see if our company would be interested in using them. The downside of that will be the shipping cost. Finding a local market is a much better idea. And now you’re going to open that letter from your brother so that I don’t have to stay in suspense any longer.”

  “Very well, but if he wants me to come home, I’m not going to do it. I have a contract with the school board to be their teacher.”

  “I heard it was month-to-month, not a full year.”

  “So what? It’s a contract.” She stood up and picked up the letter. She slipped her finger under the envelope lip and ripped it open. She read the brief missive and burst into tears.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “Eva, please. You know I can’t stand to see a woman cry.” Danny was pushing a box of tissues into her hands. Eva dabbed her eyes with a handful and then blew her nose.

  “Gene says I must come home at the end of this month. Corinne’s mother is in a rehabilitation hospital. They expect her to return home by then.” Eva struggled to control her sobs. “A month. That’s all I have? It isn’t fair.”

  “No one said life would be fair. I’m sorry. I really am. I think you would make a marvelous teacher.”

  “If I only have a month, then I will be a marvelous teacher for one month.” She wiped her eyes and threw the tissue at the trash can. She missed. She bent over, picked up the tissue and dropped it in.

  She pressed her lips together and looked at Danny. “Nee, I’m not going back. Gene will have to hire someone to take care of Corrine’s mother. I will write him today and explain my reasoning.”

  “He’s not going to like that. When have you ever known our brother to spend a penny more than he has to?”

  Eva’s bravado faded. “He can’t force me to return.”

  “He can put a lot of pressure and guilt on you. Are you prepared for that?”

  “I can’t believe Gott would lead me all the way up here to simply send me home at the end of thirty days.”

  “I admire your spunk, but Gene won’t. I’m sure he’ll appeal to the bishop here.”

  She hadn’t thought of that. If Bishop Schultz took Gene’s side she would have no choice but to return home. Her job would vanish and her relationship with her family would be strained. Tears pricked her eyes again. Was her stubborn pride worth a rift with her family? She had aunts, uncles and cousins who would side with Gene because they believed that family came first.

  Danny put his arm around her shoulder and gave her a hug. “A lot can change in a month. Maybe the good Lord will decide you belong here.”

  “Maybe. I’m going to write to Gene anyway.” She wasn’t going to lose hope.

  “Will you tell Willis that you have been ordered home?”

  Eva shook her head. “Not yet. He has been such a good friend to me. I will miss him more than I can say.”

  “He seems like a fine man.”

  She stepped to the sink and splashed water on her face. “I have a lot to do and not much time to do it in.”

  Would she be able to face Willis without breaking down? She had to. For his sake as well as for hers.

  That evening she wrote a lengthy letter to Gene explaining why she needed to stay in Maine an
d continue teaching. She didn’t mention Willis or how moving away from him and his wonderful family would break her heart.

  After a troubled night’s sleep, Eva was ready to face the day, determined to enjoy what was left of her time in New Covenant if Gene’s mind wasn’t changed by her letter. The three children arrived in time for breakfast but Willis wasn’t with them. Eva was grateful for the reprieve. She wasn’t sure she could keep from crying. She made cinnamon rolls as a special treat for the children. A few minutes before eight o’clock, Harley left to go wherever Harley went. Eva, Otto, Danny and Maddie all went over to the schoolhouse.

  She put Danny in charge of shelving the books and making note cards and note card holders so she could keep track of who had the books checked out. At least her books would be here if she was forced to leave. She prayed the children would find some solace in knowing she cared enough to leave her most prized possessions in their care.

  “When is the first day of school?” Danny asked. He was on the floor thumbing through some of her books for the older students.

  “It starts tomorrow at eight o’clock,” she said, wondering if she was ready. “When will you be leaving?”

  “The middle of the week.”

  She walked outside and returned a short time later with a shoebox lid. It held an inch of sand in the bottom. She sat down at her desk. “Otto, can you come here, please?”

  He came over, looking at her with suspicion. “Ja, Teacher?”

  “I know that you have had trouble reading and writing in school. Your records from you last school show it. I’ve consulted with some other teachers and we believe you may be suffering from dyslexia. It’s a condition that makes it very hard to learn to read or write. We can’t say for sure that you have it but there are tests that can tell us for certain that you do. Would you be willing to be tested?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe. I should ask Willis.”

  “That’s a good idea.” She held up the little box. “In the meantime, I would like you to practice writing some letters in this sandbox instead of with paper and pencil. I want you to spell sand one letter at a time.”

  She scooted over to make room for him. “Come sit beside me. I’ll help you.”

  “Is this the test?”

  She smiled to reassure him. “Nee, this is a way to make learning easier for you.”

  “Why write them in the sand?” Danny asked.

  “With dyslexia, a child’s ability to identify a sound when they see the letter is impaired. This lets you see and feel the grains of sand as you work. It helps a different part of your brain remember the letter. Want to try it, Otto?”

  Otto shrugged but he sat down with the box beside her desk. Eva smiled at him. “Let’s start with the letter S.” She drew it for him and she let him trace it over and over through the sand.

  While Otto was doing that, she took Maddie to the bookshelf and allowed her to pick out a book for herself. She eagerly chose one and opened the book but there were words along with the pictures. She looked up at Eva. “I can’t read this.”

  “I’ll help you read it,” Danny said.

  “Are you as excited for school to start as I am? Can you believe it starts tomorrow?”

  “I’m gonna walk to school. I don’t think Willis is ever going to shoe my pony.”

  Eva felt she should defend him. “He’s had many things to do. Some that you don’t know about. He has to work hard to make enough money so you can eat and have a place to live.”

  Maddie mulled that over and nodded. “I guess my pony can wait. Will you remind him?”

  “I will.”

  They had a lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches along with fresh apples and some of the leftover cinnamon rolls. It was a little before four o’clock when Willis walked in the door.

  Eva’s heart expanded to fill her chest at the sight of his grimy face. Tears sprang to her eyes but she blinked them away. She didn’t want to ruin any of their time together.

  He looked around the room. “Where is Danny?”

  She smiled. “He is out at the barn helping dig the post holes for the corral fence.”

  “Sounds like tough work. I should go help.”

  “Before you go I have something I want to show you.” She handed him the flyer. He looked at it and turned it over once. “So?”

  “This man sells hand-forged hardware and brackets for the kitchen cabinets that they make in their shop. He buys his lumber from Bishop Schultz. You should ask the bishop to give you an introduction. If this man likes your work, he can pick up the hardware when he comes to pick up the lumber. That way, neither one of you have to worry about the cost of shipping. What do you think?”

  “I already have a lot to do, but I’ll check with the bishop.”

  He didn’t seem excited at the prospect. Eva dropped the subject. He scrutinized her face and she worried that some traces of her tears from last night might be remaining. “Are you okay?”

  She managed a big smile this time. “Of course I am. I’m just stressed about starting school.”

  “You’ll be fine. The kids will love you.” He waved away her concern. Her fake grin faded. She longed to tell him she might be leaving but she kept silent. One of them hurting inside was enough.

  * * *

  Willis glanced at Otto as the two of them were cleaning up the kitchen after supper that evening. “The first day of school is tomorrow. Are you excited?”

  “Not really.” Otto slowly dried the plate in his hand.

  Willis grunted. “I didn’t care for school, either.”

  Otto looked at him. “Why?”

  “It was hard for me. A lot harder than it was for my friends.”

  Otto went back to drying the plate. “That’s the way it is for me, too. I’m just dumb, I guess.”

  “I’ve heard you described a lot of ways but I have never heard anyone call you dumb.”

  “Eva thinks I have something called dyslexia. Do you know anything about it?”

  “I don’t. What does Miss Eva say about it?”

  “She wants me to have some tests to see if I’ve got it. I don’t know. What good would it do?”

  “Maybe they can cure it if they know what you’ve got.” Was he giving the boy false hope?

  Harley came into the kitchen. “I heard about it from one of the Englisch kids back home. He said his older brother had it. He was going to be tested because his grades weren’t very good and sometimes it runs in families.”

  Willis turned to look at Harley. “You mean more than one person in the family can have it?”

  “That’s what he said.”

  “Did he get tested? Did he have it?” Otto asked.

  “I never found out. We moved here, and I never saw him again.”

  Willis mulled over Harley’s information. Was it possible he had this dyslexia thing along with Otto? It would explain a lot.

  Maddie came out of her bedroom in her pajamas. She had a book under her arm. She held it up to Willis. “Eva gave me a book from her library. Will you read it to me, Willis?”

  “I’m busy, not now.” It was the same excuse he always used when he was confronted with something to read.

  Her lips turned down in a frown. Willis wanted to read to her. He often made up stories for her. She didn’t know they weren’t the same words that were printed in the book he was looking at. But soon she would know and she would realize how ignorant her big brother was.

  Harley reached over and took the book from her. “Come on, sprout. I’ll read it to you.” He looked at Willis and winked.

  Willis’s mouth fell open. He knew. Harley knew that Willis couldn’t read. Shame left a bitter taste in his mouth. He had tried so hard to keep it a secret but a thirteen-year-old boy had figured it out. It made him wonder if Eva knew, too. He didn’t think he could bear that. />
  “Do you think I should be tested?” Otto asked.

  “I don’t know.”

  “Harley, me and Maddie, we all like Eva a lot.”

  “I like her a lot, too.” He sensed that there was something more to Otto’s comment.

  “Do you think you’ll ever get married?”

  “Why is everyone so concerned with my marital status? If I don’t want to get married, I am not going to get married. That’s the end of it.” He hung his dish towel over the faucet and walked out of the room and out into the evening air.

  The lights were off at Eva’s home. He wanted to see her but he decided against it. He began walking out to the road and instead of following it, he crossed it and went up to the school. He laid a hand on the building. It had been built to last. Harley’s grandchildren and great-grandchildren would stick their gum to the bottom of the seats, sing hymns and put on a Christmas play for their friends and family. He wished his experience had been different, but his childhood memories of school were mostly unhappy ones. He didn’t want that for Otto or for Harley and certainly not for Maddie.

  Willis turned his footsteps toward home but he didn’t have enough willpower to pass by the schoolyard without checking to see if Eva was waiting on him on the swings.

  She was.

  He could still change his mind. He hesitated, but in the end he followed his heart and not his head. He sat down in the swing beside her. “You’re up late.”

  “A little. I can’t sleep.”

  “Nerves?”

  She chuckled. “Exactly. That feeling of oh-what-have-I-gotten-myself-into? What has you walking the playground at this time of the night?”

  “I have a lot of things on my mind.” He got up and walked a few steps away. Then he turned to her again. “You are one of them.”

  “Me? Why do I trouble you?”

  “Because I can’t stop thinking about you.”

  “I think of you often, too.”

  He took a step closer. “I don’t just think about you. I see you everywhere. I see you when I’m awake and I see you in my dreams. You’re in all the things the kids tell me. I can see your eyes smiling at me from across the road.”