“Get help, Mom,” I said, sparing her one last painful glance. “Or you’ll lose more than your kids.”
She sobbed behind us as I led Cassidy down the hallway and toward the stairs. Inside, my heart was breaking. On the outside, I was hard as stone. We got to her car and hopped in. Cassidy was totally silent as I navigated my way through the streets of Kansas City. We didn’t speak again until we got on the interstate.
“Graham?”
My watery eyes burned. I kept them stubbornly trained on the road ahead, even as I felt Cassidy’s gaze on the side of my face. I couldn’t imagine what she had to say after that. A million possibilities came to mind, and none of them good.
“Graham?” she repeated.
I spared her a quick glance. She looked so small, sitting in that passenger chair. “What?”
“I’m sorry.” Her eyes slanted down with sympathy and she reached over to place her hand on my leg. “I’m so very sorry.”
I blinked hard and then reached down to grab her hand. She squeezed my fingers tight, her palm hot against the clammy coldness of my own. I held onto her for as long as I could, soaking up her warmth.
There was no way of getting around it. The lies my mother had sold me were rooted deep. In a matter of minutes she’d viciously torn them out, like weeds in the thirsty soil, and wrecked everything I’d planned. There was no going back. Not now.
I had no home to go back to.
Chapter Twenty
Cassidy
A dark cloud had settled over Blue River.
It didn’t matter that it was early September, temperatures in the eighties, or that the sun was shining up above us this weekend. None of that could chase away the dark cloud that was Graham as we filmed our last interview Wednesday at the Tutors Inc. with Michelle Murphy, a young gal who’d started this business when she’d seen a need for specialized education help in Blue River.
Her shop was set up just down the block from Grandma’s house, next to the gas station. It was little, but she’d seen a lot of interest, and business was quickly growing.
“I just don’t think I’ll be able to afford to keep my rates low enough for the people around here if I have to find somewhere else to rent,” she explained, her brown eyes tearing up as she looked around at the teal-painted lobby area. Her gaze settled on the largest wall which had been papered with a collection of crayon drawings from her youngest students. “This eminent domain deal will be the end of Tutors Inc. I just don’t think I’ll be able to open again. I spent every penny of my savings on it. I won’t recover.”
Michelle was so sincere in her worry, it was hard to maintain my composure. I blinked away tears and glanced over at Graham to see if he was equally affected. He stood behind the camera, his arms crossed tightly over his chest, his expression unreadable. It’d been the same all week. No matter what I tried, he couldn’t seem to bounce back from the disappointment of seeing his mother’s place this morning. He was sinking down a dark hole and I was afraid he’d never come back up for air.
“Thank you for sharing with us, Michelle.” I smiled at her. “I really hope you don’t have to shut down.”
“Me, too.” She patted my knee. “Thank you for taking this on. I know it can’t be easy, facing off with David Cook and the rest of the council. He’s a bulldog. He doesn’t back down easily.”
“Luckily, I don’t scare easily.”
She bit her lower lip and glanced hesitantly at the camera before turning back to me. “You just take care of yourself, okay? And make sure that daddy of yours is keeping his eye out, too.”
I smiled gratefully at her, but I had it all in hand. The best way to defeat Mr. Cook was to get the word out. Once people of the town understood what this deal would do to members of the community, there was no way they could support it. Even Mr. Cook would have to back down. The council vote was law.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. And I’ll let you know when we’re ready to release your interviews.”
Michelle thanked me and then I hurried to help Graham put away the equipment. He was silent, his jaw clenched shut the entire time. We carried the stuff out to the parking lot and stored it in the back of my trunk. Once I was behind the wheel, I started up the car and glanced over at Graham sitting in the passenger seat.
It’d been six days of this. Six days of letting him stew in his own frustration. Homecoming was this weekend and I hadn’t even brought it up. Graham just didn’t seem in the headspace to deal with that kind of stuff. I wanted to help him. I needed to see him smile again. It was the only thing that was going to help me stop worrying so much about him.
“Graham...” My mouth felt extremely dry. I licked my lips and tried again. “Graham, I want to talk about last weekend.”
He turned his face to stare out the window at the street as we drove. “Nothing to talk about.”
That wasn’t true. There was so much to talk about. Like his mom trashing her apartment, which was supposed to be Graham’s new home. Or the shady friends passed out all over her place. Or the needle marks on her arms and the empty syringe on the coffee table. Dad had shown me how to recognize those kinds of things. He’d taught me so that I could get myself out of dangerous situations like that. What he hadn’t taught me was how to comfort a friend who’d grown up always surrounded by those dangers. How had Graham and his brother survived? It couldn’t have always been that bad, could it?
“Did you talk to Nash, yet?” I asked. If Graham wouldn’t talk to me, hopefully he’d at least discussed it with his twin.
His jaw muscles flexed. “Not yet.”
That was a dead end. It was back to me, again. “I know you’re disappointed. You have every right to be. You can tell me about it.”
He shifted uncomfortably in his seat and glared down at the floorboard. “I’m not disappointed. It’s just what is it. My life’s always worked like that. It’s better not to expect anything good to happen. That way, you’re never disappointed.”
I hated seeing him like this. So dejected and defeated. I hated that so many things had happened in Graham’s life to bring him to this moment. He deserved better. He deserved a mom that would do everything she could to get him and his brother back. He deserved a home. He deserved people that loved him.
Pulling into the driveway at the ranch, I thought about Ken and Mary and all the boys who called this their home. Graham did have people who loved him. It might not have been his blood family, but the people here really did care for him. He just needed to open his eyes and see that not everything was lost.
I put the car into park and reached over to grab Graham’s hand. He remained deathly still beneath my touch, his fingers frozen. It was the first time we’d really touched all week. I searched his face, even as he refused to meet my gaze.
“Good things will happen to you, Graham. I promise.” Emotion poured into my voice, making it hard to talk. I wished I could’ve used them to show him just how deadly serious I was about all the good still surrounding him. “You can’t give up. Not yet.”
He looked up at me, his grip on his poker face slipping. Beneath the stoic frown, I could see the devastation and the hurt written in his eyes. It struck me straight to the core, like a knife. He opened his mouth and then shut it again, indecision crossing over his expression. He wanted to say something. That was a step. I’d wait all night for him to open up, if that’s what it took.
But then my ringtone went off and my phone began to vibrate loudly in the cup holder between us. Graham slipped his hand out from under mine and jerked his head at my phone.
“You should get that,” he said gruffly.
Frustration filled my chest. Of all the moments to ring, this was definitely one of the worst. I picked the phone up and answered it with more aggression that was probably necessary.
“Yes? Hello?”
“Miss Redmond? This is Sherry Dwight. I’m a member of Blue River’s city council.”
Immediately, my tone softened and I glanced at
the side of Graham’s impassive face. “Yes, hi, Sherry. I know who you are. How can I help you?”
“The board’s been deeply interested in your online project about the residents of Cherry Street. They’d like to call an emergency session to review what you have and discuss the implications of the eminent domain deal. Would you be available to present to the board tomorrow at 4:00 pm?”
I bounced excitedly in my seat, celebrating as silently as I could. No need to freak Sherry out. This was exactly the kind of audience I needed with the city council. My videos weren’t even fully online yet, except for a few teaser clips, and already news was getting around.
“Y-y-yes, we’ll be there. Four o’clock on Thursday to present to the city council.”
I watched Graham for any signs of life. He tried to hide it over the last couple weeks, but I could tell he’d gotten nearly as invested in this project as me. Surely, this would spark some kind of feeling for him. But all he did was stare blankly at the dashboard in front of him.
“Thank you, Miss Redmond,” Sherry responded. “We’ll see you, then. Have a lovely evening.”
I thanked her, too, and then hung up. It was nearly impossible not to shout with joy at this news, but I kept it inside for Graham’s sake. With as steady of a voice as I could muster, I explained the call to him.
“The council wants to call an emergency session. They want us to present. We’re obviously touching some nerves.”
He looked up at me, his lips forming a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “That’s great, Cassidy. I really hope you win.”
“We will.” I reached for his hand and squeezed it. “As long as we do this together.”
His brow furrowed and his frown deepened as he stared hard at me. I wished I could know what he was thinking. Had the moment between us passed? Was it too late for him to open his heart to me?
How could I fix this?
He surprised me suddenly by leaning forward and capturing my face in his hands. Pressing his lips firmly to mine, he kissed me long and slow. This was nothing like our previous kisses. This one was full of emotions too complex to name. A delicious shiver ran down my spine, traveling all the way to my toes. I was helpless to fight it. All I could do was work my mouth against his soft lips until he finally pulled away.
“Goodnight, Cassidy,” he said, grabbing his backpack from the back seat before jumping out the door.
I watched him walk toward the farmhouse. His shoulders were hunched and his step slower than usual. He didn’t look back at me. Not even when he reached the front door. And then he slipped inside and disappeared. All the while, my heart began to fracture.
Growing up in a small country town, I’d always heard that a cowboy never said goodbye. But I was pretty sure that was a lie.
Because that sure felt like the beginning of Graham’s goodbye.
Chapter Twenty-One
Graham
Someone bumped hard into my shoulder, waking me up from the daze I’d been in all day. I looked up to see the busy hallway streaming around me, kids headed to practice or home after the last bell. Monday had sped by. I was one hundred percent sure I hadn’t heard a single thing in any of my classes. I wasn’t sure why I’d bothered to go.
It wasn’t like I’d be here tomorrow to turn in any assignments.
My feet came to a halt as I spotted her at the other end of the long hallway. Cassidy was the only reason I’d come to school today. I’d needed one last glimpse of her before I left this town and headed west to find my brother. She stood at her locker, surrounded by a group of seniors who were rough housing and chatting as if they didn’t have a care in the world. Hannah was leaning up against the locker next to hers and they both seemed to be laughing at something.
It almost hurt to see her like that. She was achingly beautiful and kind and belonged to a world that I could never be a part of. It was better to cut it off now, before things got any more intense between us. Cassidy would be fine. She was strong and smart and always had a plan. She’d get over me quickly.
I wasn’t sure I’d be so lucky.
Cassidy looked down at her phone and began typing into it. Ten seconds later, my phone buzzed with a new text alert. I held it up to see her message.
Cassidy: City Council meeting in an hour! I can’t believe we’re finally doing this.
Regret settled in my throat like a bad cold. I shut the phone off and slipped it back into my pocket. Cassidy was going to rock this presentation. She was going to save those homes. She didn’t need me to do it.
No one in this town needed me around.
With one last gaze in Cassidy’s direction, I turned and headed down the hall in the opposite way. Keeping my head low, I avoided everyone’s eyes. The plan was the same as last time—get to the interstate and hitch a ride. But this time, instead of heading east to Kansas City, I’d be heading west. When Nash and I met up, we’d come up with a new plan.
I hadn’t texted my brother about it, yet. It was too easy to imagine what he’d say. He’d tell me to stay put. To trust the system. To wait and see what happened and not do anything rash. But I was done with waiting. Waiting had gotten me nowhere. I needed to be somewhere I belonged. I needed my family. He was the only one left who cared.
Everything of value to me was already tucked away in my backpack. A few changes of clothes. Some food I’d managed to nick from Mary’s kitchen early this morning. The case of CDs. The bear. The few bucks I’d managed to squirrel away. And a piece of paper that Cassidy had written a song lyric on and passed it to me only a few days ago. The only things I needed.
The back door was in sight. A few jocks were already streaming out of it to head to practice. I quickened my pace. It was just my luck as I reached for the handle that someone else got there at the same time. A familiar blond figure with a desire to follow the rules that was so strong, it practically emanated off of him like some kind of radiation.
“Graham?” Matty looked up at me in surprise.
“Hey,” I grunted. “What’s up?’
I didn’t usually go out this way. Our truck was parked in the front lot and it wasn’t like I was headed toward the football field or anything. The only thing to do was not act suspicious.
Matty opened the door for me and followed closely behind. Derek and his buddies were up ahead, already halfway across the parking lot to the football stadium. I glared at their backs, hating the very sight of them.
Why did everything come so easily to a guy like that? He’d probably graduate, go off to a fancy college, become a dentist like his dad, and come back to this bump in the road of a town and continue his family’s awful legacy. He’d marry some girl, who didn’t care that he was the scum of the earth, and he’d have children just like him. I really didn’t get it. What had I done to deserve all this, while Derek sailed through life?
I could hear Matty’s footsteps on the concrete behind me. I was hoping he’d shake loose, but no luck. Jogging to my side, he looked me over.
“Aren’t you headed to the city council meeting with Cassidy?” he asked.
I groaned internally at the mention of her name, unable to stop the regret flowing through me. Cassidy expected me to be at that meeting. She was probably sending me another text about now, offering to drive me over there. She’d be so angry when she found out I’d bailed.
Maybe that was for the best. Maybe it was better if she hated me.
“Sure, yeah.” I nodded at Matty, not really enjoying this part. Lying had never sat well with me. “Just got to grab Cassidy’s car. We’ve got a lot of equipment to load.”
It would’ve been just my luck if Cassidy had parked her Camry out front today. Her usual spot was in the back, so I’d taken the least risk with that lie. Still, Matty’s eyes narrowed as he looked over at me. The boy was like a modern-day Captain America, except without all the super hero powers. Just a golden boy with a talent for sniffing out lies like a basset hound.
“Well, good luck out there.” Matty patted
me on the back, smiling as he swallowed my lie whole. “Bring back a win for the ranch, will ya?”
I put on my cheeriest smile and waited until he’d jogged off to roll my eyes. The meeting with the council wasn’t some sporting game. This was people’s lives. People who relied on their homes and businesses. I knew what it was like to have something torn away from you. It wasn’t easy. And it definitely wasn’t about bringing home a win.
It was about doing the right thing.
And that was why Cassidy was going to win.
Keeping my eyes on the asphalt ahead of me, I zigzagged through the cars in the parking lot. There was a cornfield on the back of the high school. On the other side was a highway that led straight to the interstate. Most importantly, it led out of town and in the opposite direction Cassidy would be driving to get to her big meeting.
I sent up good thoughts for her as I began trekking through the seven-foot-tall stalks, the school quickly getting smaller behind me. I didn’t give it another glance. I couldn’t. My stomach had turned to lead and I had the feeling if I opened my mouth, I would empty out the small bit of lunch I’d been able to force down today. Every step farther away was as painful as the last.
As soon as I got out of Blue River, it would be easier. At least, that’s what I promised myself. But unlike Matty, I couldn’t swallow down those lies as easily.
I could only hope Cassidy would forgive me.
Some day.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Cassidy
The room at city hall was getting crowded. I pressed my shaking hands to my stomach and willed them to stay still. There were the Lees, sitting in the front row and waving at me. The Ivanovs in back with Michelle sitting next to them. Dad had brought Grandma in his cruiser. They both sat in the middle, where most of the seats around them had already been claimed. News had spread fast about this emergency town council meeting. I wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.
Cowboy Crush : A Small Town, Enemies-to-Lovers YA Romance (Sweet Oak Teen Ranch Book 1) Page 15