good girl, 46, 86, 131, 205, 277, 292-293
Gordon, Dr. Thomas, 122, 129, 156, 160
gorilla basics, 291-294, Map of, 292
gossiping,
and fear, 99
and Gremlin, 367
and intimacy, 273
and neurotic speaking, 170, map of, 171
and sanctuary, 329
and self-revealing, 78
is triangulating, 369
Great Labyrinth of Spaces, see: Labyrinth
Gremlin,
and Archetypal Love, 479-480
and Archetypes, 491
and being hooked, 497
boundaries with, 327-328, 305
definition of, 495-496
and detecting deficiencies, 280
and ending relationship, 217-218, 470-473
feeding schedule, 186, 326, 368-370, 433
and internal movie projector, 320
and leadership, map of, 174
and low drama, 186, 499
and Man, 329
and manipulating, 147
naming of, 366-368
and nonlinearity, 370-372
and ordinary relationship, 327-328, 349
owning, 368-370
relationship with, 338
and resentment, 217
and responsibility, 368, 496
and revenge, 271
and self-observation, 185
and sitting, 402
training and using, 139, 286, 338, 370-372, 496, 507
and underworld, 349-353, 362-366, 495-496
and victim, 315
Groder, Dr. Martin, 71
Groundhog Day (film), 210
guilt,
beating yourself up and, 266
and Gremlin, 370
and mixing feelings, map of, 98
and responsibility, 508
and responsible victim, 38
vs. Responsibility, Map of, 266
H
“Ha! Ha! I got you!” see: I win, you lose
Handbook for Creating Ordinary Family Relationship, 455-456
Handbook for Creating Ordinary Human Relationship, 38-50
Handbook on Living Happily Ever After, 476-482
happiness,
breakthrough in, 340-341
and Box, 203-204
danger of, 93
in extraordinary human relationship, 120
duration / permanence of, 181, 224
and media, 103
and personal growth, 8
and Western culture, 31
pill, 104
as purpose of life, 104
heart,
being in, 411
communication and, 157-159
cultivating the broken, 257-259
and decisions, 187
feeding the, 207-209
and imagination, 202
and jealousy, 99
and low drama, 35
song lyrics about, 208
as transducer of feelings, 496
and work, 209
also see: four bodies
Heart of the Labyrinth, see: Center of the Labyrinth, Labyrinth
Heisenberg, Werner, 85
Heraclitus, 104
Hidden Purpose (Process), 366-368, 496
high drama,
vs. Archetypal Drama, 338
and communications, 161
and conscious theater, 366, 496-497
and destiny, 320, 490-491
and low drama, 36, 366, map of, 361
Map of Relationship as, 400
and mothering, 461
and relationship, 304, map of, 312, Map of, 361
and responsibility, 488-489
and rite of passage, 461
and stellating Archetypes, 366
and stories, 319-321, map of, 320
also see: responsibility, rite of passage
high level fun, see: high drama, Pirate agreement
High Noon (Rischard), 316, 351
holding space,
and anger, 94-95
and Archetypal Relationship, 269-272, 304-308, 333-334, 486,
map of, 314, 332
and attention, 304, 412, 457-459
and being a space, 485
and Bright Principles, 331, 338
and Box, 239
and Countenance, 407, 412, 413, map of, 401
and declaring, 497
and destiny, 142, 274, 304, 331, 373, map of, 373
and discovery speaking,172-173, 491, map of, 171
and discussion, 170-172, map of, 171
and double space-holding, 268-269, Map of, 294
and energetic intimacy, 235
and Everything, 273
and extraordinary relationship, 120, map of, 400
and family, 198, 454-459
and feelings (Four Feelings), Map of, 96
and gameworlds, 373-377, map of, 376
and high drama, map of, 400
and intersection of worlds, 373
and magnificence, 329
and Pirate … Woman, 482
and Possibility Speaking, 172, map of 171
and relationship, 140-142
and responsibility, 497
and Requiem, 474-475
and responsibility, 140-142, 299
and speed of Love, 410
also see: core skills, space, navigating space, meeting technology
Hold On To Your Kids (Neufeld), 197
homework, 340-341
hookable / hooked,
and Adult ego state, 118
and bull fighter, 432
and Child ego state, 117
and do-overs, 491
and emotional reactions, 102-103
and extraordinary relationship, 136-140
and forgetting, 514
and Gremlin, 137-138, 371, 497
and Low Drama Detector, Map of, 184
and other’s Boxes, 143-144
and Parent ego state, 114-115
and resentment, 289
symptoms of being, 137-138
ways of being, 137
also see: unhookable, Disk of Nothing, gap, Springscreen, voices in your head, Voice Blaster
I
I win, you lose, and belief, 363
and discussion, 172
and Gremlin, 366
and Map of Three Games, 365
and mixing feelings, 503
and patriarchy, 52
and schadenfreude, 99
vs. Winning Happening, 515
also see: survival, mixing feelings
I win, you win, 365, 515
also see: Winning Happening
identity,
and “who am I?”, 276-277
as a character, 77-78
as a child, 117
for men, for women, 267-268
in patriarchy, 55
for security, 315
shifting, 33, 275-277
in Western culture, 403
also see: the Box
identification,
and actions, 75
and being a character, 77-78
and Box, 497
and naming, 78
and other roles, 77
and relationship, 411
and shifting, 33
also see: misidentification
imagination,
and child raising, 265
and fear, 68
feels like, 200-201
and Feminine worlds, 302
and gameworlds, 377
and handicaps, 60
having no, xiv, 44
and healing, 417
and heart, 202
and Internet, 448
and linearity, 200
and mind, 200
and ordinary relationship, 326
and problems, 4
and reading this book, 8
and relationship intelligence, 9, 30
and resources, 332
and sex, 448
and victim stories, 79
and who you are, 497
and witch hunts, 60
Impro (Johnstone), 201
inauthenticity, 128-130, map of, 129
incompetence, see: Soft Skills, Map of Learning, 122
infatuation, 31-32, 312, 476
inner navigating, 97, 177-178, 497-498; also see: navigating space
Inquisition, 63-64
insanity,
and beliefs, 133-135
and child raising, 198
and feeling, 180
and new actions, 124
and ordinary relationship, 143
and possibilities, 80
and power, 80
tolerating your partner’s, 241
and Western culture, 52, 280, 453
intellectual body, 90-91
Internet sex, 186, 334, 369, 448
intersection,
between two media, 224
between what is / could be, 223
Conference, 238
with unknown (Edgework), 221
of worlds, with Map of 373
intimacy,
and antagonistic partner, 8
and Box, 83, 323-324, 327-328, 435-436
as Bright Principle, 364
in chaos, 288
and children, 100, 197
and communication, 156-159
and Countenance, 405-406
definition of, 497
and discovering treasures, 293
Edgework, 227, 234-241, 269, 281
and evolution (of relationship), 398-401, 467-473
and expectations, 240
factors effecting, 465-467
fear of, 100, 291
and feeling, 97
and four bodies, 90-91
and infatuation, 32
lack of, 217
and letting self be known, 189
and Man, 337
Map of Four Kinds of, 235
never final, 325-327
and nits, 149
and “now,” 283-284
and oneness, 286-287
and patriarchy, 56
prerequisites for exploring, 325
and psychological processing, 283-285
relationships and, 189, 323-324
and resentment, 289
and stress, 212
and sword work, 299
and taking outrageous risks, 341
and time / place, 273-275
and Viagra, 311
irresponsibility,
not “bad,” 364
consequences of, 296
definition of, 498
as delusion, 315
detector, 147
games of, 360-366
and Gremlin, 364-368
as illusion, 131, 360, 514
serving, 356
and Shadow Principles, 142, 364
and unconsciousness, 364
and Western culture, 316, 365
is-glue, 252, 498; also see: stories
is-glue dissolver, 498; also see: stories
J
jargon, 5, 330
jealousy, 91, 99, 184, 235, 363, 510, map of, 98; also see: mixing feelings
Jesus, 259, 283
“Johnny Lingo’s Eight-Cow-Wife” (McGerr), 386
Jung, Karl Gustav, 5, 484; also see: Archetypes, Jungian
justification,
and aggression, 61, 359
and beliefs, 133-134
and Box, 214, 222, 472
and church authority, 344
and consciousness, 326
and decisions, 79
and feelings, 180
and Gremlin, 217, 261, 370
and inauthenticity, 129-131
and low drama, 37, 38, 183-185, 437, 499-500, map of, 36
and memes, 501
and ordinary relationship, 82-83, 217
and persecutor, 504
and problems, 76
and rescuer, 509
and revenge, 37
and voices in head, 114
and victim (story), 38, 318-319, 512, 514-515
and what we want, 190
K
Kama Sutra, 201
Kansas, 244
Karpman, Dr. Stephen, 35-36, 499-500; also see: low drama
Keller, Helen, 288
King Archetype, 102, 164-166, 295-296, map of, 355, map of, 361
in Bright world, 484-485
in Shadow world, 495-496
also see: Archetypal Man, Adult, Gremlin, Queen Archetype
King, Warrior, Magician, Lover (Moore and Gillette), 485
kingdom of heaven, 247, 442
Kingmaker, 389, 482
Klien bottle, 63
knowledge continent, 13, 309, 490, 493; also see: defensive learning, expansive learning
Köhler, Wolfgang, 90, 494
Krause, Marion, 98, 503
L
laboratory,
and developing skills, 173
and evolutionary experimenting, 247, 468
and extraordinary love, 119
and gameworlds, 374-375
of intention and agreement, 3
and learning about relationship, 219, 334, 341
and thought prisons, 75
and Tonic Gold™, 513
your, 7, 374, 498-499
also see: gameworld, navigating space
Labyrinth,
Heart (Center) of the, 4, 252, 254, 426-429, 435, 495, 499, 503
your map of the, 352
Map of the Great of Spaces, 255
of Spaces, 254-255
also see: navigating space
ladder of technology, see: technopenuriaphobia TPP
Lankford, Valerie, 92
Last Samurai (film), 176
Later Adolescent Relationship, Map of, 399
learning
and actions, 124-125
defensive, 13, 490
expansive, 13-15
liking, 125-126
Soft Skills, Map of Learning, 122
team, 22
Life in the Labyrinth (Gold), 412
light speed, xiv
linearity,
and Archetypal feminine, 328
and being hooked, 138
and Box, 203, 310-311
and Countenance, 393
and dangerous questions, 172
and defensive learning, 13
and flying, 480
and Marshmallow Zone, Map of, 223
and meeting technology, 501
and men, 285, 290
and mind, 502
and problems, 332, 499, 503
and relationship 200
and Requiem, 475
and solutions 203
and time, 459-460
and Western culture, 52, 189, 200, 333
also see: nonlinear
liquid state, 126-128, 263, 376-377, 499, Map of, 127, Map of Flying, 481
Listening, Four Kinds of, 164-168, 505, Map of, 165
Little Big Man (film), 210
Little Book of Lies and Other Myths, The (Lozowick), 435
longing,
and Archetypal intimacy, 325
and attention, 302
and authenticity, 7
and broken heart, 259
and ecstasy, 271
for extraordinary / Archetypal, 175, 380-381, 407, 414
for Goddess, 425
for God, 435
for heaven, 483
for longing, 415, 429
and sacrifice, 333
Longstocking, Pippi, 139
looking bad, 22-23, map of, 122, 197
looking good vs. learning, 22
lose-lose, 515
love,
Archetypal, 248-259
extraordinary human, 119-120
Three Kinds of, 499, Maps of, 31, 119, and 249
ordinary human, 30-32
True, 249
Lover Archetype, see: Communicator Archetype
low drama,
detector, 183-186, 500
and Gremlin, 184-186
and high drama, 499
/> is not life, 37, 499
Map of, 36
Map of __ Detector, 184
and responsibility, 35-38, 499-500
also see: high drama, Map of Possibility
Lozowick, Lee, 5, 25, 55, 266, 296, 339, 405, 412, 435, 442, 482, 503, 508
lyrics of, 390
M
magic lamp, 287
Magician Archetype, see: Creator Archetype
Maker Archetype, see: Doer Archetype
making time, 319, 442, 459-460, 500
making wrong, 207, 217, 261, 273, 369, 389, 499, 510
man,
and authenticity, 2
Archetypal, see: Archetypal Masculine
as dad, 59-60
ordinary, 57-58, 200
song lyrics about, 208
also see: Pirate … Man
Man and Superman (Shaw), 331
Manmaking,
as conscious theater, 301-302
in The Handbook for Archetypal Maidens, 427
and Kingmakers, 482
and the King’s throne, 284-285
Map of Procedure for, 284
and soft skills, 281-291
and power, 285-286
as treasure hunting, 427-428
Mandela, Nelson, 132
manipulation, 34, 215-216, 304, 329, 364, 497, 510; also see: blame, praise
Map of Maps, 94
map, see: thought-map; Appendix, List of Thought-Maps
Map of Possibility, 361
marshmallow zone, 222-224, 500-501, Map of, 223
mass (egoic), 488, 503
matriarchy,
as alternative form, 54
defenselessness of, 395
hearing stories of, 51-52
patriarchy as negation of, 52
rejuvenating, 269
matrix building,
and Archetypes, 484-485
and attention, 132-133, 485
and being, 486
and Box expansion, 377
and behavior change, 202
and cathexis, 23
and consciousness, 15, 121, 202, 257, 501
and distinctions, 17-18, 250
and experiments, 15, 493
and Gremlin, 496
and intimacy, 497
and learning, 122-123, map of, 122
and necessity, 250
and not knowing, 230
and practice efforts, 8, 15-17, 229, 265, 406, 412, map of, 16, 507
and presence, 132
and real questions, 508
and sitting, 401-402, 509-510, 513
and soul, 510
and stress, 147, 221, 510
and Tonic Gold™, 513
and writing, 20
also see: cathexis, practice
Matrix, The (film), 501
Matus, Don Juan, 66, 377, 510
meeting technology,
for accepting changes, 474-475
for alternative forms of culture, 351
for Archetypes to work in world, 304
for collaboration, 170-172
for convening diversity, 501
for creating Countenance, 412
for cultures – men’s, women’s, children’s, 54
for emotional processing / clarity, 467
for festivals, 54
for fun, 4
for gathering, 252-255
for liberating intellect, 505-506
for liquid state / responsible change, 128
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