by Nikki Ash
“Babe?” Trevin looks to me.
“Um… yeah, if you want.”
“What time?” Trevin asks his sister.
“Around noon? That will be after morning naps, and both kids will have full bellies,” she comments.
“Good point,” I agree with her.
“We’ll meet you there,” Trevin says. “Now, let me get back to my family, and you need to get back to yours.”
“You do remember that I’m your sister, right?”
“Yes. And I love you, but I just got them, Thea.”
Tears well in Thea’s eyes. “I love you.” She leans in for a hug. “And you,” she says, turning to look at me once she’s released him. “How have I gone all this time and not realized it was my big brother?”
I too have tears in my eyes. “Because I didn’t have a name. I didn’t know where he was from, just that he was visiting.”
“But Hazel Eyes. I should have connected the dots.”
“Why would you? There are millions of men with hazel eyes.”
“Yeah,” she concedes. “You good?” From the soft tone of her voice, I know she’s not asking as my daughter’s aunt, but as my friend.
“We’re good.”
She turns and points at her brother. “Don’t be late.”
“Then leave so I can finish feeding my daughter and work on feeding her mother.” He wags his eyebrows, and Thea, although laughing, pretends to gag.
“I could have gone without that,” she says, opening the door and stepping into the hall.
“Love you, little sister,” Trevin says, closing the door. “I have to give her hell because she’s my little sister, but I’m so fucking glad that she was the one watching Hazel.”
“She’s amazing, and she’s been a huge help to me with Hazel. She was there for me while I was pregnant and during and after delivery. She and my best friend, Shelby. I couldn’t have done any of this without them.”
“I doubt that. You’re an amazing mother.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Bullshit. I see how happy Hazel is. She’s healthy, and you came right away yesterday. You’re the best momma this little angel could ask for. Her daddy too.”
“You got her?” I ask, changing the subject. I still feel a mound of guilt resting on my shoulders, that due to my actions, Hazel lost time with her daddy. Sure, she’ll never remember, but one day she’s going to ask why he was never in any of my pregnancy photos, or photos of her the first three months of her life. I’m going to have to answer for that. “I’m going to make us some breakfast.”
“I wanted to have you for breakfast.” He smirks.
“No condoms,” I remind him.
“Don’t need them for what I have planned.” The devilish smile tilting his lips tells me exactly what that is.
A shiver of anticipation races down my spine. “Real food first, and then we’ll see.”
Snaking an arm around my waist, he pulls me into him and presses his lips to mine. “It’s going to happen, baby. I promise you that.” He smacks my ass and struts back to the living room to finish giving Hazel the rest of her breakfast. I can’t help but wonder how this is my life.
It turns out I had a hard time pulling Trevin away from Hazel. He insisted he hold her while we ate our own breakfast. He played with her until she was too fussy to keep going. She was a handful as he tried to get her to sleep, but he insisted that he could do it. My mom instincts told me to just take her from him, but then I reminded myself that he is her father. More importantly, he’s here and wants to help take care of her. He wants to learn our routine, what she likes, and what she doesn’t. How do I get in the way of that?
“I have to admit,” Trevin says, coming back to the living after laying Hazel in her crib. “I wasn’t sure I was going to be successful at getting her to sleep.”
“She fights it sometimes. My guess is that she was having too much fun playing with you, and she didn’t want to miss it.”
“Yeah?” His eyes light up.
“Yes.”
“I love her, Cadence.” He shakes his head, and the look on his face tells me that he’s in disbelief. “I never thought—” He smiles. “She’s perfect.”
“She is. She’s such a good baby.”
“You’ve done an incredible job with her. Thank you. I know it was hard for you to do it all on your own. I’m sorry I wasn’t here for both of you.”
“It was unavoidable. The past is behind us.”
“Moving forward,” he says, offering me his hand. “I believe I made you a promise.”
“I’m not going to hold you to that. We really need to get ready.”
“We have time,” he says, not bothering to glance at the clock. His phone rings, and he grins when he looks at the screen. “Hey, Mom.”
I freeze when I hear the word “Mom” come out of his mouth. My attention is focused on him as I wait to see what’s going to happen. Will he tell her about Hazel? About me? My hands grip the hem of his T-shirt that I’m still wearing to keep from wringing them together. Will they hate me? Will they accept her? There are so many questions filtering through my mind.
“Oh, she did, did she?” He grins. “Yeah, I do have some news. Hold on, let me switch to video, and I’ll show you.”
I shriek and take off, running down the hall. His laughter follows me. “That was Cadence,” he explains. “She’s special.” I hear him tell his mother.
I’m in my bedroom with my ear pressed to the door. I’m not ashamed to be listening to his conversation. I would have remained out in the living room, but the last thing his mom needs to see when she meets me for the first time, via video or in person, is me in her son’s T-shirt sans bra, and my hair a mess from our lovemaking the night before.
That’s a hard pass for me.
I’m sure it’s going to be a hard-enough battle when she finds out I kept Hazel from him, even though it was beyond my control. I’m glad Thea understands the entire story. She knows how the night went down. I hate that she has the intimate details of my time with her brother, but at least she knew the story before he appeared back into my life.
“Mom, I need you to remain calm and not scream or cry. You have to be quiet when I show you what I’m about to show you,” he says. I hear Hazel’s bedroom door open. His voice trails off, and that won’t do. I need to hear her response.
As quietly as possible, I open the bedroom door and sneak out into the hall and stand just outside Hazel’s door.
“Mom, I’d like for you to meet your granddaughter. Her name is Hazel.”
The sound of a female gasp hits my ears. “Trevin, explain that gorgeous little girl to me,” his mom says, her voice cracking.
“Cadence, that’s her mom. She and I met over a year ago. It was a night I’ll never forget, and it gave us Hazel.”
“Your dream girl?” she asks. My eyes widen at his mother’s knowledge of our night together.
“That’s her.”
“How did you find her? Does she know that you looked for her? Oh, honey,” his mom murmurs.
“I’m moving home, Ma,” he says. “I need to be here for my girls.” Butterflies take flight, and emotion clogs my throat. It’s as if it’s real now that he’s telling his mother.
“What about your job?”
“I’m going to call Grant Riggins on Monday and tell him. Maybe they have a spot here for me at the Indy location? I’m not sure, and right now, I can’t find it in me to care. I can’t walk away from them. I won’t.” There’s conviction in his voice that threatens to take my breath away.
I wipe the tears from my eyes and slide to the floor, burying my face in my hands. It’s too much. Too many emotions are running through me. Regret that I ran scared, happiness for my daughter who has a father who loves her and is willing to uproot his life to be with her, and then there is this flutter in my chest that’s always there when I think about him. The him from my past, and the him from the present. I feel this deep-rooted
connection with him that scares the hell out of me. I’ve never had someone who stuck around. No one except for Shelby, and well, Thea if you count the last year.
My head jerks up when I feel his hand on my shoulder. Trevin is crouching in front of me, a look of worry on his handsome face. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” I smile, wiping at my cheeks.
“It’s something.”
“You’re really moving here?”
“Of course, I am. I told you that.”
“I know, but I—” I stop speaking. He doesn’t need me to lay my shit life on him right now.
“Come on.” He stands and offers me his hand. I take it and let him pull me to my feet. He leads us into my bedroom and motions for me to climb into bed. Too exhausted to argue, I do as he asks. “Now, tell me. Don’t hold back with me, Cadence. We know what happens when we do that. Nothing but truth between us from here on out. Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“I lost my parents when I was young. Well, my mom. I guess my dad was never around, at least that’s what I’ve read in my file. My mom was addicted to drugs. She overdosed when I was six. I went into the foster care system, and was bounced around from home to home. When I was about nine I landed with a family that stuck. They were good to me, but not overly loving. They made sure I had food, clean clothes that fit, and everything I needed, they were just emotionally detached. When I turned eighteen, they allowed me to stay with them until I could move into my college dorm and that was it. Shelby, my best friend, was my roommate my freshman year and we’ve been close ever since. She’s been my person until I met Thea when I moved here about a year ago.”
“I’m sorry,” he says softly.
“I don’t want you to be sorry for me. I just— To hear you say you’re staying and then tell your mom the same thing, it just kind of hit me that Hazel is going to have both parents. That you’re a man of your word, and that she’s not going to grow up like I did. She’s going to have two parents who love her, an aunt who she already adores, and grandparents,” I say, choking on the word. “She’s going to have a real family. Something I never had.”
“It’s not just her, Cadence. It’s you too. You’re her mother. My family is your family. You’re my family.” He leans in close and kisses the corner of my mouth. “I’m not letting you leave me again,” he says, pulling me into his arms.
We lie together, holding onto one another as his words filter through my mind. I know we need to start getting ready for the day, but I never want to leave his arms, or this apartment where, for the time being, he’s not just a memory, he’s all mine.
All ours.
Chapter Eight
Trevin
It’s Sunday night at six, and I’m still in Indianapolis. I have a long three hours’ drive back to Lexington, but I can’t seem to make moves to go. I hate the thought of leaving here, leaving them. It’s pulling at my heart, and I hate it.
“Don’t you need to get on the road?” Scott asks.
“Yeah,” I agree, not taking my eyes off Cadence and Hazel, where they sit on the couch with my sister and nephew, Clint.
“I can’t believe Cadence is your dream girl.” He smiles. “It’s a small world. At least now I know it wasn’t just some drunken dream,” he comments.
“Hey.” I turn to face him.
“There he is. Now I have your attention.”
“I don’t want to leave them here.”
“They’re going to be just fine. I’m next door, and I’ve been watching out for her since the moment my wife declared Cadence as her new bestie.”
“It’s my job,” I say, irritated and thankful at the same time that my best friend has been looking out for my family.
My family.
“Maybe I can convince her to come with me?”
“Nah, she’s got a good job, which she never misses unless it’s for Hazel. She saves all of her time off for that little girl.”
“She’s a good mom.”
“She is.”
“I’m in love with her.” I see him nod from the corner of my eye.
“Figured as much.”
“It’s crazy, right? One night, and then this weekend, and my heart feels as though it could explode from how much I feel for her.”
“Is it maybe just because she’s the mother of your daughter? And by the way, no paternity test?”
“No. She’s mine. I feel it.”
“She looks like you. I don’t know how Thea and I didn’t put it together before now. Well, I do. I knew about your dream girl, and so did Thea.”
“Yeah, thanks for that,” I say to him, but he keeps going.
“She also knew about Cadence’s situation. I’m shocked she didn’t put two and two together.”
“She probably would have, but I never told you where I was when I met her. I didn’t tell you it was my last visit.”
“That’s probably it. You know my wife, if she even suspected, she would have been all over that like a rat on a Cheeto.”
“I do know my sister, and you’re right. She would have been,” I agree. Cadence and I both have regrets from that night. We both have to live with them, and move forward. That’s exactly what I plan to do. Move forward as a family. Leaving him, I go to my girls, lowering myself to the floor to sit next to them. I offer Hazel my finger, which she latches onto immediately.
“Are you ready to go?” Cadence asks.
“No.”
“You have a three-hour drive,” Thea reminds me.
“I know. I’m not going.”
“What do you mean you’re not going?” my sister asks.
I ignore her and look to Cadence. “I can’t make myself leave the two of you.” I hear my sister say “aww,” but I continue to ignore her. “Do you think you can take a day or two off and come with me?”
“I don’t know. I save that time in case Hazel gets sick.”
“You’re not doing it all on your own anymore, Cadence. You have me, and I promise you I’ll be there for every minute. Please?” I’m aware of the pleading in my voice, and I’m not the least bit ashamed, not when it comes to my girls. I’ll do what it takes.
“Babe, have you seen my phone? I need to record this. Trevin Hubbard is begging.” Scott chuckles.
Raising my hand in the air, I flip him off, making him laugh. Hazel turns to look at me, and I move to take her from Cadence. “Hey, baby girl,” I say softly. “Tell Momma you want to take a road trip with Daddy,” I tell my daughter. She just smiles and coos. “See, babe. She wants to go.”
“I can’t just call in, Trevin.”
“How much time do you need?”
She’s quiet so long I think she’s going to flat out turn me down. I’m surprised when she pulls out her phone and taps the screen before putting it to her ear. “Hi, Debbie, this is Cadence. Something has come up, and I was hoping to take a few days off. I know I have patients scheduled, but—” She stops and listens. “Really? Are you sure? Thank you so much, Debbie. I’ll be back on Monday.” She hangs up and looks at me. “That was my boss. It turns out she was going to offer me some time off this week. There’s a new therapist starting, and she wants her to take my schedule for the week, while Debbie works with her to show her the ropes.”
“Why not just have you train her?” Thea asks.
“Debbie likes to get firsthand knowledge of how her new hires are with patients. She always trains herself. The last time she did this, I got caught up on charting and did some continuing education classes.”
“You said Monday.”
“Yeah, I’m free this entire week.” I don’t even try to hide my smile. My girls are coming home with me, which means I don’t have to be without them. I’ve already missed so much time, the thought of leaving them even temporarily was tearing me in two.
“Come here.” I motion for her to lean closer. As soon as her lips are close enough, I kiss her, not giving a damn that we have an audience. “You’re coming home with me?”
&n
bsp; “For a few days.”
“That’s all I need. Come on.” I manage to stand, still holding Hazel. “We need to pack what she’s going to need for the week. I read that it’s best to travel when babies are sleeping to not interrupt their routine. If we leave here around eight, we can make it to my place at eleven, feed her, and maybe she’ll sleep for the rest of the night.”
“You read? Why have you been reading about babies?” Scott asks.
“Because I’m a father.”
“When?” Thea asks.
“While my girls were sleeping the past two nights.”
“Trevin,” Cadence whispers. I can see the wonder in her eyes, and the disbelief. I don’t care how long it takes, I’m going to prove to her that I’m in this. That she and our daughter are my world. I know it’s fast, but when you know, you know, and I am certain that she is who I want. I want us to raise our daughter together, and have more babies that I’ll be there for every step of the way.
“I needed to know what to expect, how to take care of Hazel, and help you. You’ve had the entire pregnancy and the first three months of her life to get up to speed. I had some catching up to do. I still have some catching up to do.”
Cadence nods, leaning in and pressing her lips to mine. “You’re one of a kind, Trevin Hubbard. I’m so glad we found our way back.”
“Me too, baby. Me too.” My voice is thick, and I’m man enough to admit I’m choked up. I went from wondering if I had imagined her and our night together, to having a family. I’ll take the latter every damn time.
“You better get moving,” Thea says. I can hear the tears in her voice, and sure enough, when I glance at my sister, she’s wiping at her cheeks as Scott takes their son into his arms.
“Hear that, baby girl?” I ask Hazel. “You get to come home with Daddy for a few days.” I’m already imagining them in my space. Sure it’s not where we’re going to be living, but having them in my home, it’s going to make this all that much more real.
“Call me when you get there,” Thea says.
“We will,” Cadence assures her.