by Kate Rolin
Before Cyrus knew it, she’d locked eyes with him. He watched as recognition followed by shock played across her features. Her lips parted, followed by that familiar blush at catching him staring. He couldn’t breathe and was unable to look away while carriages and people continued passing in between them.
Suddenly, the man with Olivia spoke to her and she turned toward him distractedly. A large carriage passed through the street just then blocking Cyrus’s view of her momentarily.
He was gone before she could look back again.
Cyrus rode home in silence. He felt acute pain as if the wound in his heart had been ripped open afresh. He thought about the newly purchased ring. Though he no longer had need of it, he couldn’t bring himself to return it.
Perhaps one day he’d send it to Olivia as a wedding present, but it wouldn’t be to him.
He now saw she was with someone much more suitable for her, especially in age. In the scene that had played before him, he saw the makings of a perfect looking family. And more than that, she’d looked…happy.
Yes, Olivia would marry Derrick Stratton, he was sure of it. And no matter if Cyrus thought Derrick undeserving of her, if it made her happy, he wouldn’t stand in her way.
After all, isn’t that what he had wanted for her?
Chapter Thirteen
Four days later, Olivia was again having supper at the Wainwright home after Josef’s lessons. The meal now concluded, they all retired to the drawing room.
“Josef, come, tell me more about this new little scientific experiment you have been working on.”
Olivia smiled. For all of Lady Wainwright’s annoyances, she really was kind to Josef and appeared to take an interest in him. Josef walked over to where the Lady sat and began to animatedly describe his newest educational endeavor. Olivia did not really listen to their conversation, though, as she walked over to the nearest window and looked out into the evening lost in thought.
“Care to step out on the balcony? I wouldn't mind a little fresh air myself.” At the sound of his low voice, Olivia turned to find Derrick beside her. She’d been so lost in thought she hadn’t heard him approach.
He looked especially handsome tonight in a velvet blue frock coat that fit him well and complemented his dark complexion and blonde hair. He smiled that easy smile of his and offered his arm, which Olivia took without a word, returning a small smile.
They stepped through French glass doors onto the small balcony overlooking the garden below. The air was chilly, but not unbearable as the unseasonably warm end to winter continued. Olivia hugged her ivory shawl around her shoulders and leaned onto the stone railing, breathing in deeply.
“You look a million miles away, just as far as you seemed all throughout supper.” Derrick walked up to Olivia.
“Do I? I suppose I am a little distracted tonight. I hope I wasn’t offensive to your mother.”
“Not at all. I only hope everything is well.” Derrick paused and stepped closer. So close Olivia could feel his heat on her left side. “I…I hope you feel, by now, that you can tell me anything.”
Olivia didn’t look at him. What could she say? That she had resolved to move on from a man who didn’t love her? And that just when she was getting used to her new life, when she’d had such a lovely time shopping in town four days ago (with only Derrick and Josef as Lady Wainwright had conveniently come down with a headache at the last minute), she had seen him as if he appeared out of thin air? Cyrus had been there, across the street, looking right at her—only to disappear just as quickly, throwing her world upside down…again.
Could she tell Derrick that Cyrus’s disappearance had broken her heart afresh after she thought for just a moment that he was going to rush up to her and pull her in his arms again and declare he’d been wrong to leave her in the first place?
And then, would she tell him that the next day Cyrus’s solicitor called on her? He had informed her that His Grace no longer wished to be her guardian now that she had returned to England. He reviewed her accounts and how everything had been invested and then offered to continue his services with her or that she may choose to employ another solicitor if she wished. In a daze, she had agreed to keep working with Mr. Malcolm, but in truth, it was mostly due to that fact she’d barely heard a word he said. All she could think about was that it was final. Cyrus was severing all ties to her. He truly wanted her out of his life.
She had felt a light go out in her. The hope that had swelled within at spotting Cyrus had been dealt a stronger blow by what had followed. Could she…should she tell all that to Derrick?
Instead, she simply smiled and placed a hand on his arm, as was becoming customary for her. “I’m merely mourning the loss of my past lately, more than usual it seems. But I believe I am finally ready to move on. To truly return to London.”
His brilliant smile returned and the concern in his green eyes was replaced with a gleam. “You have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that. There’s a matter of importance I’ve wished to speak to you about for a while now, but did not know if it was the right time.”
Olivia had a feeling she knew what this important matter would be. She felt a dread coming on, but reminded herself again that there was no chance remaining with Cyrus.
Derrick stepped even closer and raised his right hand to gently caress the side of her face with the back of his fingers. “You…are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on and from the moment we met I have felt a connection to you. You are not only beautiful, but a kind and strong woman to have endured everything you’ve been through.” He reached up to finger an auburn tendril near her face. “I’m afraid I’ve fallen in love with you. I don’t expect it in return, not right away. I know you loved your husband and it takes time to heal.”
At the mention of Karl, tears formed in Olivia’s eyes. “Yes, I loved him very much. He was a kind man and a loving father.”
“Yes, Josef is proof of that. I am very fond of the boy myself and would like to be more than just a tutor to him. I’d like to be able to protect him, to take care of you both, and to be a father to him, though I know I could never replace his own.”
Olivia was now at a loss for words. She knew what was coming next. As she looked into his handsome face, she tried to ignore the apprehension building inside of her.
“Olivia, I want you to be my wife. I know you may not love me now, but it will come in time. You can know I will care for you both and you will be settled for good here.”
Her heart screamed, Cyrus! But her head replied, He’s gone you fool, he isn’t coming back. Not to you anyway.
Yes, perhaps in time she would love Derrick. He had been nothing but kind to her and Josef. If she accepted, she could give Aunt Elizabeth back her home to enjoy alone with her new husband. And Josef did need a father-figure in his life. Lady Wainwright, though perhaps overly zealous, did seem to care for them as well. This is what Olivia had set out to accomplish after all. And she had to admit she found Derrick attractive...that was a start.
After a pause, she spoke. “Derrick, you flatter me. You and your mother have been so kind to Josef and myself since we arrived. I will need some time to think about what you said.”
“Of course, Olivia.” Understanding filled his eyes.
“But I shall not make you wait too long. Let me have a week. In a week’s time I will have an answer for you.”
“Very well, one week, but I fear it shall be the longest week of my life.” He smiled. His gaze dropped to her mouth and then back as if seeking permission.
Olivia figured she might as well let him kiss her now as any time. If she accepted his proposal, she could be expecting many more. She smiled softly and closed her eyes as Derrick lowered his mouth to hers. It was warm and soft at first, then became more firm—as if he wanted her to know how serious he was about everything he’d said.
While he kissed her, Olivia waited.
She waited for the flames that erupted every time Cyrus’s lips had touc
hed hers, but they never came.
But, she argued with herself, she had not experienced that with Karl either, at least not as intense—yet she had still loved him. Perhaps it would be the same with Derrick in time and the passion would grow for her as well.
Besides, it wasn’t as if the kiss was unpleasant. On the contrary, it was very nice to feel desired again. And in her limited experience—as she had only ever kissed two men prior to this—she felt that Derrick was very skilled in this department and was, in a way, letting her know he was capable of much more.
Wanting to feel more of his desire for her, and hoping to feel something in return, Olivia reached her arms up gently around Derrick’s neck and allowed him to deepen the kiss.
Perhaps everything would be alright after all. Besides, she still had a week to make a decision.
~
That evening, after returning from seeing Olivia and Josef home, Derrick found his mother in the library.
“Well, how did it go?”
“One week. She’s asked for a week to consider.”
“If she didn’t refuse you outright, that’s a good sign. I’d say we will have an engagement to announce soon.”
“Don’t worry, I made sure to give her something to think on tonight as well.” His wicked grin appeared.
“Good, good. Well done! If you can convince her to a quick engagement, she could be living here within a matter of weeks!”
“Oh, I shall not mind convincing her in the least. That will not be a problem.”
“Then I will hopefully be able to do a little convincing of my own and will be living in Alston’s house before the end of the year—as the new duchess!” Lady Wainwright's wicked grin matched that of her son’s.
And I shall finally have what is rightfully mine, Derrick thought as he clenched his fists.
~
Upon returning to Aunt Elizabeth’s that evening, Olivia made her way to library, having kissed and sent Josef off to bed. She opened a small book she had begun reading the day before, but just couldn’t seem to focus on the page. At the sound of footsteps, she looked up from the wingback chair she was curled up in and saw Elizabeth coming over to sit in the one beside her.
“How was supper, dear? I didn’t see you when you came in. Is Clara well?”
“Hmm? Oh, yes, Lady Wainwright sends her regards.”
“What’s the matter, dear? You look a million miles away.”
That was the second time Olivia had heard that tonight, but perhaps it was because it was true. Might as well lay it all out in the open.
“Derrick has asked me to marry him.” Olivia gave her aunt a side glance and saw her visibly stiffen. She still did not completely understand why her aunt disliked the man so.
“And have you accepted?” Elizabeth’s voice sounded strained.
“I’ve asked him to give me a week before answering. I want to make sure I do what’s best for Josef.”
“And for yourself?” Elizabeth almost snapped the words.
“Josef is who’s most important.”
“I see.”
They sat in silence for a moment.
“Do you love him?” Elizabeth’s question was spoken quietly.
“I’m fond of him, yes. And Josef admires him. He says he loves me—that’s more than many marriages can say. I’m sure with time I would come to love him as well. I just need more time to…”
“Forget?”
Olivia’s eyes shot to her ever-perceptive aunt. “Yes, I suppose you’re right. It will take time to…to forget him.” The sadness that overcame her just then frustrated her. Would it never end? Suddenly, Olivia felt very irritated at the whole situation. “I don’t know why you dislike Derrick so, Aunt Elizabeth. He’s been nothing but kind to us.”
“I’m sorry Olivia. I can’t put my finger on it, but I just don’t trust him. And Clara, she would be your mother-in-law. She would live in the same house as you. Is that what you want?”
Olivia paused, she had not really thought of that yet. Well, what of it? Lady Wainwright had her faults—as did everyone—but seemed to care for both her and Josef.
“Besides, Olivia, he isn’t the right one for you.”
“And who is? The man who rejected me to my face and disappeared, only for me to see him in town last week and then disappear again? The same man who has made it clear he is cutting all ties with me and has removed himself as my guardian? Or is it just because Derrick isn’t a marquess like his brother? You know I don’t care about such things, I never have! To think such a thing is like spitting on the grave of my own beloved, untitled Karl!” Olivia was standing now, fists clenched at her side. She knew deep down that Aunt Elizabeth only wanted what was best for her, but her hurt at the whole situation translated into anger towards her aunt.
“Olivia, you know me better than that. And I didn’t realize Cyrus had removed himself as your guardian. Is that why Malcolm came the other day? I’d thought perhaps…” Elizabeth broke off in thought. She’d thought Malcolm’s presence had been part of Cyrus’s plan to make things right with Olivia. He’d said he intended as much in his brief reply to her berating, but necessary letter. And that they’d seen each other in town was also news to her.
“You thought what, Aunt Elizabeth?”
“Nothing dear, I apparently misread the situation.” She smiled and walked over to pat Olivia’s cheek.
Olivia drew her into a hug. “I’m sorry, Aunt Elizabeth.”
“I know, dear. You have had life deal you quite the unfair hand lately. That can take a toll on a person.”
Olivia sniffed, on the verge of tears. “Yes, well, I think it best if I go up to bed. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, dear.”
Olivia started to leave and just before she reached the door, Elizabeth’s voice gave her pause. “Dear, just don’t make a hasty decision. You have a whole week, take the time to really know if it’s what’s right…for you.”
Olivia turned and smiled. “I will, thank you, Aunt Elizabeth.”
She left and Elizabeth remained standing for a moment, wringing her hands and working her lower lip.
“James?” She called for the footman in the hall and he entered right away.
“Yes, Milady?”
“Send for Jonathan at once. I have a message to be delivered right away. Hurry!”
“Right away, Milady.”
As James went to fetch the running footman, Elizabeth rushed over to the library desk and pulled out paper, pen, and ink.
Cyrus—
I have knowledge that Stratton plans to marry Olivia. I know you said you would make things right with her, but it appears that is not the case. Even if you no longer wish to be united with Olivia, I ask you one last favor for my sake and I will ask no more.
I do not trust them—mother or son. Hire investigators to look into Derrick's time in Africa. I do not have the means nor influence as you have. If there is anything amiss, we must find out within one week—or I fear it will be too late.
Faithfully,
Elizabeth
Elizabeth blew on the ink and folded the note just as Jonathan entered. He bowed, “At your service, my lady.”
“Jonathan, thank goodness you’re here. Take this at once to the Duke of Alston. I don’t care if the entire household is asleep. Break a window if you must, but make sure the Duke get this tonight!”
Jonathan bowed.
“Oh, and Jonathan, not a word of this to the other servants.”
“As you wish, my lady.” He turned and was gone.
Now all Elizabeth could do was wait—and pray Cyrus would uncover any information in time.
~
Cyrus, sitting in his study that evening, had long since given up trying to sleep. He knew he would eventually doze a few hours in his desk chair and tonight was no different. He’d had a drink—or two—and sat down, waiting for the darkness to overtake him.
Another nightmare—for he never dreamed anymore—had just begun when a
pounding on the study door startled him back into consciousness.
Cyrus grumbled and rubbed a hand along his stumbled jaw—when had he last shaved? “What is it?” He growled.
Charles entered, holding a piece of paper. “This just arrived for you from Lady Brighton. I’m told it’s imperative you read it right away, Your Grace.”
At the mention of Elizabeth, Cyrus sat up. Was it Olivia? Was she alright? Or could it be another heated note of hers telling him what he already know—that he was a wretched man indeed?
Cyrus stood, deciding it likely to be the latter, and snatched the note from Charles. He returned to his desk, his back a dismissal for the butler.
Left alone again, Cyrus threw the unopened note down. Did Elizabeth feel a need to torture him further? Did she not see Olivia had made a more suitable choice? Rage that had been building within him exploded and he flung his empty glass across the room, shattering it against the wall.
His anger abated as quickly as it had come. Sitting back, he propped his feet up on the desk and again closed his eyes, reminding himself this was why he didn’t drink. He should have known the stuff would only make matters worse, especially when paired with his volatile mood.
What if he was wrong? What if there was something wrong with Olivia? Even if she did not choose him, it did not change the fact that he loved her, still cared about her.
He opened his eyes as he slowly put his feet on the floor and reached for the note. He read it one, two, three times. He rubbed his rough jaw again. He did not believe Elizabeth was merely trying to meddle in Olivia’s affairs this time. He could sense her pleading in her written words.
But Olivia was making her own choice. She was no simpleton. If it was her wish to marry Stratton, marred past or no, it would not be up to Cyrus to ruin it for her.
But you love her.
The thought came to him unbidden and something in Cyrus froze.
What if Elizabeth was right? What if Stratton’s mysterious and forgotten past put Olivia in some sort of danger?