Inside

by Kyra Anderson

  “I will accept that just because I know that you have no better way to turn this conversation to your advantage.” He grinned darkly. “Why is it so hard for you to think that I would be obsessed with the experiments and, therefore, want to continue them? Don’t tell me you haven’t been intrigued by Mykail.”

  My blood ran cold, knowing I had to tread very carefully with the topic of Mykail. I knew Dana would not approve if I told him I was getting closer to Mykail, and there was no way of knowing what he would do to either of us if he found out.

  “Think about it, Little Lily.” He stepped forward again. I fought the urge to retreat, though the closed door behind me would have halted me. “I told you this already. Wouldn’t it be amazing to have wings? To fly above a city? What about infinite strength, able to move any object in your way, tear down every barrier? That’s the stuff that makes superhero stories.”

  “Have you ever really read those?” I asked darkly. “What about all the downsides?”

  “What about them?” Dana shrugged. “It’s just like the downsides of being human, isn’t it? That’s why it’s so incredible to create these experiments. I get to see the very limits of humanity pushed to the edge and see just how far we can go as a species. I swear, Eyna’s getting to the point where he can read minds. I don’t even know how much more he can progress, but I can’t wait to find out.”

  “You said that the experiment that killed Bryant Morris was dealt with accordingly,” I said, trying to keep myself from shaking at his close proximity. For some reason, in his office, in the darker areas of the Commission, it was extremely difficult to think clearly. My thoughts were swimming in fog, elusive. “Was it an experiment from the Machine of Neutralization project? Aren’t you worried the same thing will happen to you?”

  “Not at all.” Dana shook his head. “No, he was not from that project. He was just a stubborn, but ordinary criminal brought in by the Commission. Bryant Morris became obsessed with that experiment because he was terrified of him. I am fascinated by our experiments. And, unlike Mr. Morris, I am not afraid of death.”

  “Everyone’s afraid of death.”

  “Not I. I’ve already stared death down and realized how little there is to fear in it.”

  “What the hell are you talking about? Where the hell did you even come from?!”

  “I told you, I worked under Mr. Morris at a young age.” He grinned darkly. “I have been here forever.”

  There was a knock at the door that made me jump. Dana chuckled and pulled out his sunglasses, replacing them on his face.

  “Come in,” he called, pulling me off the door.

  Mrs. Markus, Clark’s mother, walked into the room.

  “I am sorry to disturb—oh, hello, Lily.”

  “Hello, Mrs. Markus,” I greeted weakly.

  “I am sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude,” she said, turning back to Dana. “While we were in the meeting, I missed a call from Leader Simon’s Chair of Finance about the Europe delegation. I called him back and he asked if he could meet with you Thursday when Leader visits.”

  My interest was immediately piqued.

  I wondered how Leader Simon truly felt about the Commission and its leader. It was a thought that had worried me and one that I had spoken to Mykail about. If Leader Simon was really alright with the experimentations, then the chances that we would succeed bringing down the Commission were significantly lower. If the leader of our country was supportive of Dana, then we had to infuriate the people of America in order to overthrow the entire Central system—a prospect that seemed impossible.

  “That’s fine,” Dana answered her. “Danielle, how late were you planning on staying tonight?”

  “Not late,” she answered. “Why? Is there something you need me to do?”

  “Not exactly.” Dana looked at me. “Tommy left his little girl here to talk to me, and I was hoping you could take her home when you leave.”

  “Oh, of course.” Mrs. Markus grinned. “Clark is in the first conference room, if she wants to stay there until we leave.”

  “Alright. I’ll just finish up our conversation. I’ll be in the back for the rest of the night, so you are welcome to leave whenever you want,” he told her. The sentence was said with such authority that I realized Dana really did own everyone. He told them when to show up, what to do, when to leave…he was the master of the Commission of the People, not the leader.

  “Very well.” She smiled sweetly, closing the door as she left.

  “Don’t you let your people sleep?” I groaned, glancing at the clock and realizing that it was nearly two in the morning.

  “Of course,” Dana laughed.

  “Then why are you going to be in the back with the experiments at this time? Why do you experiment on everyone at night?”

  “We don’t,” Dana corrected. “We’re a twenty-four hour operation, Little Lily. We’re never closed.”

  The news startled and perplexed me as I tried to think of a way we could sneak people out around the constant activity.

  “What about you?” I pressed. “When do you sleep?”

  “I don’t,” Dana answered. “I gave up the habit. Besides, I wouldn’t miss Eyna’s testing time for anything,” he smirked.

  “You test on him at night?”

  “Generally, he’s tested on around two to three in the morning.”

  “Why?”

  “It’s easier to bring him out when everyone else is sleeping or quiet,” he said. “I think he’s becoming overly-sensitive to some stimuli, like sound and movement. His reflexes are phenomenal and his speed is incredible. You really should see him change by the day. It’s fascinating.”

  I was playing a very dangerous game. If I showed too much interest in Eyna, Dana might get spooked or suspicious, or he might start bringing me there every day and then I would be trapped in the Commission, just like Clark.

  “I know you’re interested…” he sang, his voice dangerous and playful.

  “Even if I was, there is no way I would want to be stuck here with you every day,” I said as coldly as I could manage, playing hard-to-get. “Why would I want to be around you every day?”

  “Because, like Mykail, you find me fascinating,” he said cockily.

  “Why would I?” I growled. “You think you’re someone who can make the judgment on other people’s lives? You take people and test on them, and kill them, even though they’re human.”

  “What is the definition of being human, Little Lily?”

  I tried to think of something to say, tried to think of how to explain how I felt in a strong enough way to throw him off-guard and hold my own ground.

  “Do you want to know why it is so hard for you to accept what happens here? You’re still feeling everyone else’s pain and fear for them,” Dana stated. “Don’t you think you have enough problems in your own life without taking on everyone else’s problems as well?”

  I felt like I was playing a game of tug of war. Even though we were not close physically, I could feel the pull between us, and Dana was pulling me on his path, and I needed to pull him where I wanted.

  “This is a part of my life,” I whispered, my voice weak. “This is part of my problems.”

  “Why?”

  “Because you pulled me into it, and I don’t like what you do to people.”

  “Ah,” Dana said, still smiling. “You raise an interesting point, Little Lily.”

  “How can you be the one to decide who lives and who dies?” I growled. “What gives you the right?”

  “You do,” Dana said, his voice flat and strong. “You, the people, decided enough was enough, and you deemed who was fit for society and who wasn’t. Isn’t that what the revolution was for?”

  “No, the revolution was to gain back what we lost,” I snapped. “Thomas Ankell fought the revolution because people were stealing from each other, the government was so corrupt that the entire world was suffering from it, the people were suffering.”

  “So,
it’s alright that he killed thousands? That he and Bryant Morris decided it was best to ‘cleanse’ the population to avoid another situation like the one that bred the Second Revolution? That he took the extremist approach in order to reform the country? But the Commission of the People, his legacy, is too extreme for you?”

  “Yes,” I said. “That was war. This is a time of peace.”

  “Ooh, you better be careful, Little Lily. You’re starting to sound like a politician,” he chuckled. “Everything is alright as long as it’s in the name of war and money, no?”

  “That’s not what I meant!”

  “Then what did you mean? Your argument is weak. You think that everyone is equal, but if everyone was equal, do you think we would need to exploit and rule each other? Do you realize how many people line up for slaughter at a single word from someone who holds a title over them in name alone? Fear is the power people have over one another. Why do you think all of your other friends won’t talk to you anymore? You’re more powerful, and that makes you someone to be feared. You don’t even have to do anything. All you have to do is tell them you’re part of the Commission and others immediately see the monster looming behind you, waiting for them to make a mistake.

  “The government is the exact same way. The laws and legislations passed are meant merely to scare and to control. There was never a point in time where people were allowed to live freely without fear,” Dana continued. “Really think about it. Back when the public could have guns, everyone had one for protection. Against who? Other people with guns. Why did all of these people get brought into the Commission? Because people were afraid of them, and afraid of the way those lives would affect the upstanding citizens.”

  I was not sure what I could say against him. Even if I could form the words, I was afraid to speak them. He seemed angry, powerful, and I was worried that if I made the wrong move, he would hurt me.

  “Humans cannot live without fear,” Dana whispered. “Fear of what’s different, fear of pain, it’s the only way to keep people from tearing themselves to pieces. So, if I have to take these people in and change them into something else to give them a new life, I will do it, because, overall, it will be better for everyone. That is something you would do well to remember.”

  “How can you say that?” I barely managed to breathe. “Can you feel anything for others at all?”

  Dana smiled sickly.

  “I’ll take you to Clark, now.”

  * *** *

  When I walked into the conference room, Clark was shocked to see me. He stood up quickly.

  “Lily?”

  “Clark, you and your mother will be taking her home tonight,” Dana said, his hand finally leaving my back as he turned and closed the door behind him. I had never seen a conference room in the Commission, but the half-wall of windows showing the hallway outside, and a long, oval table with several comfortable-looking chairs around it were the only details I could notice in my foggy state. Clark’s school books were spread over the surface of the table, meriting some notice.

  As soon as Dana was out of sight, Clark walked over and placed a hand on my shoulder. I could not think coherently, every thought a jumbled mess.

  “Lily, talk to me. What did he do to you?” Clark asked, pulling out a chair and moving me to sit as he took the seat next to me.

  “Nothing…” I whispered. “I just…I can’t…I can’t...think when I’m around him.”

  “He has that effect.”

  I turned to look at him and, for some reason, the tears came. I saw the horrified expression on Clark’s face and, normally, that would have caused me to gain control of myself again, but I could not stop. I covered my face and bent forward. Clark’s arms wrapped around me and pulled me close. I grabbed onto the collar of his shirt and cried.

  “I’m here…” he whispered.

  “I couldn’t argue against him,” I managed to get out around my sobbing. “I couldn’t…I can’t…h-how…”

  “Shh…don’t think about it.”

  “What if he’s right?”

  Clark was still for a moment and then he grabbed my shoulders and pushed me back to face him. I wiped the tears away and tried to focus on his face.

  “What he says about humans is generally true, that’s how he can convince people to do what they do,” Clark told me seriously. “No one can deny that humans are horrible creatures, but if what he is doing is right, would we feel this way about it? Would our instincts tell us that he is dangerous if he was doing some good for the world?”

  “I don’t know…”

  “No, Lily,” Clark snapped, tightening his fingers around my shoulders. “No, you have to stay strong against him. Don’t be so frightened that you give up. You can’t give in.”

  “I’m not…giving in,” I growled, trying to wipe tears away. “But…damn it, Clark, he made sense…”

  “He has his moments,” Clark groaned. He rolled his eyes. “What am I saying? He can see right into all of us, and he attacks our weaknesses. Don’t let him get to you. Don’t let him tear you down. You are a strong person and you have to stay strong.”

  I nodded slowly, wiping away the moisture I still felt in my eyes. After a few moments I shook my head.

  “You know…I never thought about the way the population must have been before the Second Revolution,” I breathed. “All mixed together…I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone from another race in real life.”

  Clark shrugged.

  “They’re not any different than us,” he said. “But I think that’s what makes it easier for some people to distance themselves from it. They don’t have any exposure to these people, so they don’t seem to be human at all.”

  “How many are back there?” I asked, motioning my head to the hallway.

  “A lot,” Clark whispered. “Ironically, even knowing the danger, people still try to sneak into the country and live a new life. Some countries are in such bad states that it’s amazing life is even there at all.”

  “What is going to happen if we do this, Clark?” I hissed. “We really haven’t thought this through.”

  “Do you think Thomas Ankell thought things through when he started the revolution? Or, hell, go back even further. Do you think that the people really thought through what would happen when they came across the ocean hundreds of years ago to start life in America? All they could see was change on the horizon, and that’s what we have to keep our eyes on.”

  I nodded slowly.

  “Dana wants me to start coming here after school,” I murmured.

  “Well, I know you don’t want to, but I would appreciate the company,” he tried to joke. I smiled and shook my head, pressing my hands to my face before running them through my hair.

  “Oh, Clark, how did this become our lives?”

  “Our parents?” Clark suggested lightly.

  “Come on, do we really blame our parents for everything?” I laughed.

  “I don’t mind doing it,” he said. “At least for now.”

  There was a knock on the door, causing us to turn as it opened. Mrs. Markus was standing there with another man behind her. He was about as tall as she was, wearing a suit with sunglasses—I assumed he was the Markus’ driver.

  He walked around Mrs. Markus as she spoke, stepping over to me, pulling out my chair as I stood.

  “Are you two ready to go?” Mrs. Markus asked sweetly. She turned to me and her eyes turned sad. “Oh, Lily, are you alright? You look as though you’ve been crying.”

  “Oh, no, I’m sorry.” I wiped my eyes again. “When I get tired my eyes start to water really badly,” I said lamely.

  “…are you sure you’re okay?” she pressed. A part of me felt a strange sense of sadness that the woman, who seemed loving and gentle, was someone who was close, and loyal, to Dana. The things Clark told me about his mother being with Dana went through my head, and I became upset at just how blind she was to her own situation. Dana had blinded her, twisted her thoughts, and contro
lled her completely.

  After Clark had packed up his books, I walked out the door that the driver held open and followed Clark and Mrs. Markus to the elevator, picking up my phone at the front desk before walking to the sleek black car waiting for us. The driver opened the door for everyone and then walked to the driver’s seat.

  “Clark, did you finish your homework?” Mrs. Markus asked, turning to her son, who sat between me and his mother.

  “Yeah.”

  “And did you find anything for Dana about Eyna?”

  “There’s nothing physically wrong with him,” Clark said.

  “Haven’t you seen him recently?” she asked.

  “Yes,” Clark said. “But they’ve been relentless with the tests. It’s possibly he’s just tired. Dana is going to run some tests to study his pain reactions on Tuesday. It’s possible his brain is firing incorrectly.”

  The conversation stopped there.

  I did not ask how the driver knew where I lived, though I never heard anyone tell him where to go. He dropped me off in front of my house.

  “Lily,” Clark said quickly, “don’t forget about Monday. We have to meet to discuss the project.”

  “Right.” I nodded, glad he reminded me. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

  I unlocked our front door, stepping inside and waving to the car that was waiting for me to get in the house. As the car began pulling away, I heard a voice behind me.

  “Lily?”

  My father walked into the foyer from the kitchen.

  “There you are.” He smiled, relieved. He opened his arms as I walked closer, hugging me tightly. I was a little surprised. He used to hug me a lot when I was little, but since I had grown up, he did not hug me the way he used to. That night, the hug felt different. He was relieved that I was safe at home. The love I felt at that moment made me cry again.

  Dana was wrong. He was completely wrong. Even if fear was a huge part of our lives, and some things that had to be done for the good of the society, it did not justify any harm done to another human being. Everyone was someone’s child, and they were loved just as my father loved me.