“He’s going to be okay,” I said, unnerved by her concern.
“Of course he will.” She tried to smile. “But you won’t if you don’t get some proper sleep.”
“I can’t.” I shook my head. “Not until he wakes up at least.”
“Mind if I stick around for a bit?”
“Of course I don’t mind. Erin, you have a right to be here.”
“Not exactly. But they’re turning a bit of a blind eye. Perk of the job, I suppose.”
She looked at Dad, and a tear rose in her eye. She wiped it away before it fell.
“You love him,” I said, filled with wonder at the idea.
Her eyes only on him, she answered, “I do.” But there was misery in her voice, as though she saw tragedy in loving him. I couldn’t bear it if she gave up on him.
“He’ll be fine,” I insisted again.
“I know. It’s just… weird. It was a dog bite. I know it was bad, but there’s been worse, you know? I mean, he’s been around dogs his whole life, and we all know his blood type, yet he’s having some kind of severe allergic reaction now? It makes no sense. He should be awake by now. And what do these wild dogs have against your family?” She tried to laugh, but it turned into a sob.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
She turned to look at me, confusion ripe in her eyes. “Why are you sorry? It’s not your fault. Bad luck is all it is. I’m sorry you had to see him like that. I was too shocked to think about what it was like for you. You must have been terrified.”
“What exactly happened, Erin? It was over by the time I got outside. You and Dad had just gone out there, so it must have happened fast.”
She nodded. “It did. It really did. There was a whole group of us chatting. Then someone screamed. We all looked around, and there was this absolutely massive dog trotting toward us.” She shook her head. “It totally ignored everyone else and faced us. Then, its lips curled back, and all you could see were these humongous fangs. I’ve never seen a dog look like that before. Stephen pushed me back, and the thing leapt straight for him, knocking us both down.” She touched her forehead gingerly. “I must have hit my head on something. The dog, it held his throat and shook him a little. Then it dropped him and ran. It was so strange.”
“Yeah, very strange,” I said, feeling my hands form into fists.
“Then, it was as though a spell had been broken because everyone started yelling and screaming, and suddenly you were there next to him. I didn’t know what to do for you. You gave that old man a bit of a fright, though.”
I had forgotten about screaming and hitting Jakob. “Not enough of one,” I said under my breath, but Erin had already turned back to Dad.
Dread filled the pit of my stomach. Nobody had seen what was directly in front of them. And the medical staff had no real clue what they were dealing with.
What if the werewolf had some kind of disease that she passed on to my dad?
There was another option that I didn’t want to think about yet. What if she had made it possible for him to turn into a werewolf?
Chapter Nine
Nathan
“I can’t believe he wanted all of this to happen, and then he just loses interest on the first night.” I literally trembled with anger.
“She was working alone this time,” Byron replied, sniffing the night air. He had been trying to ignore my complaints for the last thirty minutes or so.
“If he’s changed his plans, then why doesn’t he take off the command? What’s the point in keeping me and Perdita apart?”
Byron let out a heavy sigh. “Maybe he thinks you’ll work harder if it means getting her back quicker. I don’t know what he’s thinking, Nathan. All I know is that we can’t let that werewolf run rampant on these streets. We’re responsible for bringing this mess here, so we can’t let anyone else get hurt. It’s up to us. You said yourself I had to take care of things. Well, here I am. You in?”
“Of course I’m in.” I might grumble, but I wasn’t going to miss out on the hunt for the werewolf who had attacked Perdita’s dad in broad daylight, on our property. “But I don’t know how much use I can be. She’s good at backtracking and covering her trail. I’m not used to following that kind of scent.”
“You can do it,” Byron reassured me. It was the closest thing to a compliment he had given me.
“Where’s Opa?”
“He’s busy trying to get in touch with his contacts.” He made a disgusted noise.
“Can we just go then?”
He shook his head. “Wait for Jeremy. Follow his lead. I know it’s hard for you to take second place to him, or at least for your wolf to, but he’ll help you figure out the trail. You’re quick. You’ll pick it up. I need you to be able to follow a trail yourself whenever the scent divides. It’ll be quicker if we split up.”
“What if we see her?” I bit my lip, my stomach turning in anticipation of his answer.
“Don’t take her on unless you have no choice,” he advised. “We don’t want any more blood spilled.”
“Don’t we?”
He stared at me, his face stern. “We don’t. You definitely don’t. Look at your girlfriend, how she’s struggled with the guilt. It’s obvious to see. I don’t want that for you.”
“You didn’t care about Perdita having to carry it around,” I blurted. “You wanted more from her.”
“What are you talking about?” He sounded genuinely shocked.
“I see how you all look at her! If she hadn’t helped me, maybe Mémère would still be alive. But it wasn’t her fault. She had no choice. The curse forced her into helping me first.”
He shook his head rapidly in distress. “No, Nathan. You’ve got this wrong. I didn’t want her involved at all. Do you really think I wanted a teenage girl to take on a werewolf? Nathan, that’s not… I wouldn’t wish any of this on another person. I should have done it. My parents should have done it. But not you or Perdita. Never think that. Every time I look at her, I regret that the decision ever fell in her hands. I wish I had acted first, but I kept trying to convince myself that it wouldn’t get that far. I was wrong.”
He sounded genuine, and it surprised me. He never really told anyone what he was thinking.
“Here’s Jeremy,” he said, nodding toward the house before I could respond.
Jeremy was completely on edge. I could smell his excitement, and that wound me up even more. I wanted revenge, too, almost as badly as my grandfather. Not only had the other werewolves killed my grandmother, they’d attacked my mate’s father and ended up separating us in the process. I wanted payback. I had to take my anger out on somebody, and that wolf looked like the perfect target.
“We ready?” Jeremy asked.
I nodded.
“I’ll head toward the hospital,” Byron said. “See if she’s stalking Perdita’s family. You two follow the northern trails, push on as far as you can, and split up if you have to. Don’t confront her. We need to find out where she is and confirm that she’s alone.”
We all agreed on the plan, phased, and ran. I was grateful to Byron for keeping an eye on Perdita. I still hadn’t gotten through to her house, and the hospital wouldn’t even tell me if she was there, never mind let me leave a message. My last hope was school. I didn’t want to waste time in school while there was a rogue werewolf running around Dublin, but I had to so I could ask Joey if he had any news. Perdita’s cousin had to know more.
I raced with Jeremy, pushing past him all the time. It gave me a little thrill to beat him. He stopped short when he caught a scent, leaving me skidding to a stop. He barked at me, a smug little bark, then followed the wolf’s scent. I tried to do the same, but it was a lot more complicated than any trail I had ever followed. Jeremy kept leading me, until soon I was used to the slighter stronger aroma, used to the minor but distinct difference, and I learned how to keep my focus on that when other scents got in the way. Doing it for Perdita made it easier; knowing I was a step closer to getti
ng back to her side made me work harder.
As soon as I figured it out, the trail became easier to follow. It was as though it lit up before me, spelling out the path to take. Soon I was ahead of Jeremy, and when the trail split, he gave another bark and followed one path, leaving me to follow the other.
The scent led me through some gardens. A dog spotted me, but one snarl from me sent him running in fear. Again, I followed the trail, concentrating hard. I made it back out onto the street, and my heart almost stopped when I saw Aaron Hannigan across the road, staring at me in horror.
We both watched each other warily for a couple of seconds, but the wolf remembered all of the times he had aggravated me, how much he purposely bugged me. The wolf needed payback, and so did the human, so I ran at him, snarling and snapping. He spun around and sprinted back up the road, yelling and tripping over his own feet. When he finally fell and ate some pavement, I savoured the moment before returning to my task.
After a couple of minutes, I realised I was on the wrong trail. I cursed myself for getting distracted by Aaron until I copped on that the scent was definitely werewolf, just not the female I had been following. I kept after it, but it moved too close to the hospital, and at a certain point, I couldn’t walk anymore, so I turned back in despair. I was beginning to hate my grandfather’s alpha rules.
I tried to pick up the female’s scent again, but I was too distracted by the idea of another werewolf close to the hospital. By the time I made it to the shed at the back of our house, Jeremy was already there.
“She phased and got into a car or on a bus maybe. Her scent cut off too quickly for anything else,” he called out as I approached.
“There’s another wolf near the hospital,” I blurted as soon as I phased.
Jeremy agreed to go after his father to help him, so I quickly dressed and headed inside to wait. There was nothing I could do. Wolf roared in my head, and my fists clenched. Perdita could have kept my head in gear, but I couldn’t go to her, and that made me even angrier. I needed to do something, anything to stop feeling so bloody useless.
Opa was still holed up in Byron’s office, so I joined Amelia in the living room.
“Anything?” she asked eagerly.
“No news,” I said, still panting. “You hear anything?”
She shook her head. “Nobody knows anything yet.”
“You could go to the hospital,” I said, knowing she didn’t want to go.
“She won’t want me there.” She rubbed her temples, lines creasing her forehead.
“We’ll talk to Joey tomorrow.” I stared at the black bags under her eyes. “You look exhausted.”
Her cheeks flushed. “I haven’t slept much lately.”
“Those dreams again?”
She nodded. “They’re intense. I wake up feeling like I’m a different person. It’s kind of freaking me out.”
“Maybe you should talk to Byron.”
“Maybe it’s not anything supernatural,” she said, sounding hopeful. “I feel like I’m coming down with the flu again, too.”
I shrugged. “The way it’s affecting you sounds pretty supernatural to me. What was last night’s episode?”
Her cheeks turned even redder. “Trust me, you don’t want to know. Do you think maybe it’s like a memory or something?”
“How could it be a memory?”
“Like… a past life or something. Mémère believed in reincarnation. She said we all get a second chance at life.”
“You think you were a gypsy in a past life?” I tried not to laugh. “Think maybe you’re the one who cursed us?”
“That’s not funny.” She scowled. We sat in silence, but my mind raced.
Byron and Jeremy returned a couple of hours later, both out of breath and looking exhausted.
“There’s definitely more than one out there,” Byron informed us. “The red wolf is back, too. I know his scent.”
“So what do we do about it?”
“Keep watching. See if we can catch them off guard, find out where they’re hiding, maybe.”
“What about Perdita?” I demanded. “How am I supposed to follow them if they’re hanging around her?”
He shrugged. “I’ll look out for her as much as I can.”
“You won’t talk to her,” my grandfather said from the doorway. “We don’t want her to look as if she’s aware they’re around. Let them think we don’t know how to track them. We need them to underestimate us, to keep underestimating us.”
I let Byron argue with my grandfather. I couldn’t even be in the same room as him anymore. He made me feel sick to my stomach. If Mémère were here, she’d stop him from making such poor choices. But a little voice in my head reminded me that she had tried to help before, and he had forbidden her. She had acted as though we could have prevented things from getting worse, but he wouldn’t let her do anything. My heart turned colder toward my grandfather.
I went to bed and, for one of the few times in my life, couldn’t wait for school the next day.
Chapter Ten
Perdita
The room seemed to shrink by the hour. Seconds ticked by noisily, and Dad’s condition didn’t change. The hospital was a relatively small one, but it covered a wide area, so it was constantly busy. The noise was ridiculous. How were people supposed to get any rest? The nurses seemed relieved that I stuck around a lot, probably because every single one of them appeared harried and overworked. It made me think a lot about my dad’s job. No wonder he didn’t want to worry about me running around at night if he spent every moment of his working day stressed out.
Yet another thing to add to the list of stuff I should feel guilty about. Dad always wanted the best for me, and I kept trying to run away from him. Watching him lie there, unmoving, made me reconsider everything. I had a lifetime to explore a relationship with Nathan—if the curse didn’t finish me off first—but I wouldn’t have as long with Dad, and I wished I had made the most of my time with him.
I had a lot to think about while I sat there watching his shallow breathing, hoping he would recover fully. We weren’t particularly religious, but I prayed to feel as though I had some power, as though I could actually influence the situation.
I had always thought of my dad as almost invincible. He rarely got sick, he always knew what to do, and whenever anything happened, my first reaction was always to wonder what he might think about it. I couldn’t afford to lose him, and I had never appreciated him enough. He deserved a better daughter.
Joey’s parents showed up a number of times. Uncle David’s visits were brief because of his work, but I still caught the worry in his eyes. When the grownups looked so concerned, it had to be bad. David and Dad had always had a funny relationship. They didn’t spend a whole lot of time together, but five minutes alone tended to leave them both laughing.
“They haven’t told me anything else,” he assured me when I asked him. I kept getting the sense that the nurses were holding back, but the real truth was nobody knew exactly what was going on, or if Dad was going to be okay. The worry was constant, and all I wanted was for my Dad to open his eyes and for all of the supernatural battles to be done already.
“You’ll tell me if they do?”
“Of course, Perdy. I’ve contacted the school to let them know why you’re not there, but you should probably think about going back next week to take your summer exams. I mean, next year is an exam year, and it might take your mind off this.”
“I can’t,” I said, staring at Dad’s pale face. “I need to be here for him.”
“This is too much stress for a young one like you,” my aunt Stella warned. “Come stay with me. Let the grownups deal with this. You need some rest. A proper meal. It isn’t good for you to be here.” She screwed up her nose in distaste as she glanced around the room. I had gotten used to the medicinal smells, but the colour schemes had to be the most depressing on the planet.
“I’m the only one who can be here all day,” I reminded her. �
��If he woke up alone… no. Thanks for the offer, but I’m going to stay here. Maybe keep an eye on Gran though.”
“Of course,” she said, exchanging glances with her husband. As much as I loved Joey’s parents, I didn’t want to stay with them, not even temporarily. Dad needed me. Nobody else knew the danger, and we were on our own. Nathan’s family had made that one perfectly clear.
I had advised Gran to stay with one of her friends. I told her she couldn’t be at home because the wild dogs had our scent for some reason. She seemed to believe me, but then again, maybe she didn’t like being at home alone either. I thought it was better all around if none of us were alone, even though being in a crowd hadn’t exactly kept Dad from harm.
The more the doctors talked about blood disorders and bad reactions, the more they convinced me that I was responsible. It was my fault Dad had been at Nathan’s house. It was my fault the other wolf had turned up in the first place. Everything came from the curse, from Nathan and me, from the bad things I had done. Dad being hurt was my punishment. I deserved it, but Dad didn’t. I couldn’t get a grip on what I was thinking, but I felt as though I owed a life since I had taken one.
I wished she had bitten me instead.
Throughout it all, one thought persisted. Nathan had abandoned me. Even Amelia hadn’t visited. Maybe because I pretty much attacked their grandfather, but the more I thought about it, the more I believed Jakob deserved it for acting like a monster. I could maybe understand his family sticking by his side, but where did that leave me?
I stared at Dad, at the tubes attached to his body, and prayed he would open his eyes. I was so alone, and everything had piled on my shoulders. I couldn’t take the guilt anymore.
I told my unconscious father. I told him everything—about the dreams, Nathan, the curse, werewolves. I told him what I had done, and what had really happened to him.
“Please, Dad. You have to wake up. I need you. The werewolf could come back for you, and I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to stop it. I’ve never felt like more of a kid in my life, yet I’ve already done the worst things possible. Things that will make you hate me.” I heaved a shuddery breath and held his hand, wishing he was awake, wishing I didn’t have to be all by myself. I loved Gran, but she wasn’t exactly responsible. She wasn’t the person to turn to in an emergency. Dad was, though.
Clarity Page 8