by Ivy Smoak
“It’s not and you’re not. Actually…I think the two of you could make a cute couple.”
“First you make me awkwardly crash your date and now you want me to steal your date? Have you lost your mind? I’m leaving.” She started to stand up.
I grabbed her arm and pulled her back into the sand. “Please don’t leave.”
“I’m third-wheeling so hard right now and I hate it.”
“God, I swear it’s not a date,” I said. “I barely know him.”
“That’s what dates are for, Mila. It’s a chance to get to know each other.”
“So…he’ll get to know you instead.”
“You are the worst,” Kristen said.
I laughed.
She shook her head and started laughing too. “I hate you.”
“You love me.”
“No, I hate you,” she said.
“Please don’t leave.”
“You’re forcing me to be the opposite of a wingman. I should have taken that shift.” She started laughing again. “You’re insane, you do know that, right?”
I stuck my bottom lip out at her.
“Put that away.” She pressed her hand against my face, making us both laugh again. “So what exactly was your plan here?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know…I thought maybe it would be good for me to go on a date with someone new. J.J. clearly isn’t into me like that. But now that I’m here? I just miss him.”
She sighed. “Fine, I’ll stay and be a total cockblocker. You’re lucky that Reggie is really cute. But here’s the new plan…we need to find J.J. If you’re going to spend all night being awkward anyway, you might as well be making J.J. jealous.”
“I don’t know…”
“Give that dirtbag a taste of his own medicine.”
“He’s not a dirtbag.”
“Actually, he kinda is. He’s the reason my girl is always sad. So tonight we’re going to flip the script on him. Do you see him anywhere?” She started scanning the crowd. “I’m going to go look. I’ll be right back.” She disappeared into the crowd.
Instead of looking for J.J., I stared down at the sand. This was a bad idea. A really bad idea. I already felt guilty for trying to force Reggie and Kristen together. But using Reggie to make J.J. jealous? This was a mess. And even if I did do it…J.J. wasn’t going to change his mind about me. We were destined to be friend-zoned forever.
"Mila!" someone shouted.
Speak of the devil. I looked up at my lifeguard. He was holding two shot glasses and smiling as he wove through the crowd. He sat down next to me in the sand.
"I was hoping you'd show up. Here," he said as he handed me one of the shots and tapped his cup against mine. He downed his shot.
He hoped I’d show up? If he hoped I’d come, why hadn’t he asked me himself? "Hi, J.J." I tried not to wince at the burn in my throat as I drank my shot.
"I came by the ice cream shop yesterday but your friend said you had left early because you weren't feeling well. I guess you're doing better now?"
"Oh, yeah. I'm feeling better now. Are you here with someone?" Pushing him away always felt like the easiest solution.
"All my friends are over there. Come hang out with us."
I didn’t want to hang out with him and all his friends. That always just ended up with him flirting with some other girl. Kristen’s voice was in the back of my head, urging me to go forward with the plan. And then I saw her in this distance walking back toward us. She had both her thumbs up, thinking I was already partaking in it. I took a deep breath. What was the worst that could happen? "I'll ask Reggie what he wants to do when he gets back."
"Reggie?"
"Your friend from touch football. He’ll be back in a second, he was getting us drinks."
"Wait, are you here with Reggie?"
"Yeah, I wouldn't have known about the party if he hadn't told me about it. That would have sucked to miss out on all this fun." This was literally torture.
"I was going to invite you, but you were avoiding me again. Every time I stopped by Sweet Cravings you either sent me away or were missing.”
"I wasn't avoiding you. Besides, I didn't want to interfere with any of your plans with that blonde girl you've been hanging out with. Actually, she's looking for you right now." I gestured to her. She was staring at us.
He looked over at her. "We’re just friends.”
“Oh…like us?”
“No, not like…what, are you here with Reggie because you're mad at me?" He started laughing. "Come on, let's go dance. Stop being weird."
"Hey, J.J." Reggie was holding three cups and looking down at us. He looked kind of pissed.
How much of that conversation did he hear?
"Hey, man." J.J. stood up. "The rest of us are over there." He pointed to a group of people nearby. "Come on."
I looked up at Reggie. "I don't mind staying here, if you want."
"Nah, let's go over." He handed me one of the cups and put his hand out for me. After he helped me to my feet, he kept his fingers intertwined with mine.
Now J.J. was the one who looked pissed. We followed him over to the other lifeguards.
"Hey, Mila?" Reggie stopped me a few feet away from everyone.
"Yeah?"
"Does J.J. know that you guys aren't dating? He looks like he wants to kill me."
I took a sip of my drink. It was strong. "Honestly, I told him I liked him a little while ago and he said he just wanted to be friends." I shrugged.
"Do you still like him?"
"It doesn't really matter. Nothing's going to happen between us."
"Gotcha." He took a long sip from his cup as he stared at me. “And your friend Kristen?”
I saw Kristen a few feet away absolutely eavesdropping.
“I wasn’t sure I was ready to go on a date so I asked her if she’d come along. Actually, I think you two have more in common than we do. But it was also her idea to try to make J.J. jealous.”
“What?” She closed the distance between us. “That’s not fair, you roped me into this mess. This craziness is all your doing.”
I was relieved when Reggie laughed. He handed Kristen her drink.
“Well your diabolical plan is working,” he said. “J.J. seems really jealous right now."
I looked over my shoulder at J.J. He did seem pretty mad.
"I'm sorry, Reggie. I didn't mean to drag you into this. I'm just going to go." I'm such an asshole. What is wrong with me? I still liked J.J. I should have never agreed to this date.
"I can help you if you want."
"What?"
"If you're trying to make him jealous, I'll play along."
Kristen squealed. “Ah, that makes this so much easier!”
"I can't make him jealous,” I said. “He doesn't like me."
"He does like you. He couldn't keep his hands off you during the football game. And as soon as he heard you were here with me, he got pissed."
"Why are you helping me?"
"Um...because this is going to be fun. It’ll be great, I’ll act like a real asshole and hit on both of you all night long right in front of him. It’s only a matter of time before he’ll swoop in and save you from me. Or until he gets all self-righteous and snaps.”
“Oh, fun,” Kristen said. “This is third-wheeling done oh so right.”
I laughed. I was already feeling slightly buzzed. Could this plan really work? I wanted my lifeguard to notice me. Me flirting with a guy who was flirting with someone else? Confusing and possibly a perfect plan.
"Besides, if I’m lucky one of you will actually like me at the end of the night. I'm a much better catch than J.J."
Kristen laughed. “I’m totally in. Here’s to a fun night.” She held up her glass. Reggie did the same.
"I guess we'll see where the night goes."
“Cheers to that,” Reggie said. We all clinked our glasses together. Not really, because plastic doesn’t clink. But it was the principle of the thing.
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Reggie slung his arms over both our shoulders. I didn’t feel guilty about agreeing to the date anymore. It seemed like he was having the time of his life.
“Um…how’s it going over here?” J.J. asked. He looked at Reggie’s arms wrapped about Kristen and me. His eyebrows pulled together. It already looked like he was going to snap.
“Great,” Kristen kissed Reggie’s cheek and whispered something in his ear before she stepped away from him. “You must be the infamous J.J.” She put her hand out for him. “I’m Kristen.”
“Ah, Kristen. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Kristen laughed. “Good things I hope?”
He nodded. “You’ve been taking up a lot of my girl’s time recently.”
My girl? Did he think I was his girl? If he thought that…why the hell was he letting Kristen know and not me? I downed the rest of my drink.
"Let's go dance,” Reggie whispered in my ear. “Kristen said she’d join us in a minute. It’s the perfect time to start our plan.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to the stage. He twirled me around and his hands slid to my waist. He was a really good dancer.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see J.J. glaring at us. Kristen was still talking to him, but it looked like he had stopped paying attention. He said something to her and then walked over to the blonde girl. He grabbed her hand and pulled her to the dance floor. She immediately started grinding against him.
"Yeah, you should probably dance like that with me too," Reggie whispered in my ear.
I turned around and arched my back slightly. It looked like J.J. was going to explode.
Kristen came out and joined us. “This is going well,” she said as she started shaking her hips. “He’s so mad, Mila. He was barely listening to anything I said.” She pulled Reggie away from me and ran her fingertips down his abs. She was a much better dancer than me.
I started dancing by myself, hoping that the alcohol made me better than usual. It must have, because I noticed the way J.J. stared at me instead of the girl he was dancing with. And then he’d glance over at Reggie and Kristen and it looked like his eyes were throwing daggers. Jealous and possessive? This was totally going to work. Reggie and Kristen were freaking evil geniuses.
The DJ cut the music just when Reggie started dancing with me again.
"Okay! Who's ready for the bikini contest?!" The DJ yelled in the microphone.
Everyone started cheering.
"We still need a few more participants. So sexy ladies, make your way to the stage if you want a shot at winning the grand prize!" The music started back up.
"You should totally enter that," Reggie said.
"What?" I started laughing. "I'm not doing that."
"Really, Mila. All those guys looking at you? It's going to drive J.J. insane. You gotta enter that contest."
"I can't."
“Ah, you have to, Mila!” Kristen said. “Reggie’s right, it’s going to drive J.J. crazy.”
I shook my head.
"Here." He grabbed my hand and Kristen’s and led us over to the bar. He ordered three shots.
"Reggie..."
He lifted one up. "Come on."
I sighed. "This isn't going to make me do it." I downed my shot, but Reggie was still holding his. "You forgot to drink yours."
"I think you're going to need this one too." He handed it to me.
I downed it and looked at him. "You can get me completely drunk and I still won't enter that contest."
“This one too,” Kristen said and tried to hand me hers.
“This is peer pressure.”
Kristen nodded her head toward the dance floor. I turned around. J.J. had his hands all over the blonde girl. He whispered something in her ear and she started laughing.
"Okay, I'll do it," I said. I grabbed Kristen’s shot and downed it too.
"Really?" Reggie asked.
"Wait, should I not?" Making J.J. jealous clearly wasn't enough. Maybe doing this competition would be the last straw. I didn't want to completely break our friendship.
"No, you should,” Reggie said. “I just didn't think you'd give in that easily."
"I'm going to need one more shot."
"You got it." He ordered another round. He was smiling at me.
"What?"
"I've never convinced a girl to take her clothes off so easily."
I laughed and pushed his arm. "It’s a bikini contest, not a striptease. But thanks for your help." I kissed his cheek.
“He really is the best.” Kristen kissed his cheek too.
I hoped that J.J. was watching us now.
"Are you sure you want that last drink? You're awfully flirtatious when you're drunk,” Kristen said. “Sometimes in a bad way.”
"I know, but I need it." I lifted the glass and downed my last shot. I drummed my hands on the bar. "Okay, wish me luck, guys."
"You don't need it." Reggie smiled at me as he wrapped his arm around Kristen. She sat on his lap. She was really good at acting.
“Knock him dead!” Kristen called after me.
Chapter 18
Monday
I was so nervous. I had never done anything like this before. The first few girls had already walked up on stage to the cheers of the crowd. They were all much more well-endowed than me in all the right places. Kristen would have been a better fit for this contest. I was about to run in the opposite direction when I spotted my lifeguard in the crowd. He was standing with a few of his male friends, the blonde girl nowhere near him. I wondered where she went.
Kristen was standing a few feet away from J.J. She gave me two thumbs up. I gave one weak one back, hoping it didn’t look like I was about to piss myself.
"You'll have to take off your shirt and shorts," a woman said to me who was standing by the stage directing the other girls. "It's a bikini contest. The judges need to see you in your bikini,” she added, like I was dense. Maybe the other girls on stage needed it explained to them five times, but the idea was pretty straightforward to me. A bikini contest meant showing off your bikini.
"Right." I unbuttoned my shorts. Can I really do this? Any confidence I had when I came back here had suddenly disappeared. But seeing J.J. had made the flight response searing in my brain come to a halt. Sure, he'd probably just tease me about this afterward. Or maybe…he’d finally see me the way I wanted him to see me.
"Actually, do it on stage. Everyone will get a kick out of that. Like a striptease, minus the actual stripping."
I buttoned my shorts back up. I can't pretend strip on stage! Fuck, I can't do this. I was about to bolt when the woman grabbed my arm.
"Okay, you're up." She directed me toward the stage. It felt a little forceful, but only because I had been stepping in the opposite direction.
"I don't think I..."
"You'll do great." She lightly pushed me up the steps.
Shit. I couldn't not do it now. I was already halfway up the stage. I took a deep breath and walked up the last few stairs. The stage was slightly blurry. I'm so drunk. Or maybe I was about to blackout from nerves. I didn’t even like when professors took attendance and I had to say “Here.” What had I been thinking agreeing to this?
I walked toward the middle of the stage and stopped. All I could see was J.J. He smiled at me. I had finally gotten his attention. I needed this to work. I didn't have any more tricks up my sleeve. And I wasn’t wearing sleeves for that matter, so this was my one and only shot.
"Take it off!" someone yelled.
J.J.'s smile faded. He turned his head toward whoever had said it.
I needed him to look at me again. I slowly pulled my shirt off over my head and tossed it toward him in the crowd. He looked back at me just in time to catch it. His lips were slightly parted. He was shocked by what I was doing. Was that good?
My semi-striptease had gotten a few whistles and hollers from the crowd. Even though I was still wearing my bikini top, I felt so exposed. But J.J.'s eyes were glued on me. I couldn't stop no
w. I unbuttoned my shorts and turned to the side. I arched my back and bent forward slightly as I let the fabric slide down my hips and to the floor. I kicked my shorts toward J.J. He had to take a few steps forward and snatch them away from some random guy.
I was glad I was wearing my nicest bikini. I twirled around during the applause. This was actually super fun. Why had I been so scared? I was a natural stripper. Well, down to my bathing suit, not my birthday suit. I’d never actually strip.
"Let's hear it again for Mila!" the announcer yelled, which caused even more applause.
I walked over to the other girls standing to the side of the stage.
"Such a good move," one of them whispered to me. "I wish I had thought of that. You’re totally going to win."
I smiled to myself. I had J.J.'s attention for the rest of the competition. He didn't even look at the other girls. But I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. He looked kind of…pissed.
"Okay! All the votes are in!" said the announcer. "And the runner up is Mila!"
What? Oh my God.
"You’ve just won a 100 dollar gift certificate to Salt Air!"
I just stood there.
"Mila, come claim your prize!"
I walked over to the announcer and grabbed the gift certificate. It was so surreal. I looked out at the crowd but J.J. was gone. Shit. I didn’t even listen to who the winner was as I quickly got off the stage. A bunch of guys crowded around me, blocking my path. Fuck. Where is J.J.?
"You were awesome up there," one of the guys said.
"Thanks." I tried to see around them, but they were all taller than me.
"So, are you seeing anyone? I'd love to take you out to dinner sometime."
"Yes, I am," I lied. "Sorry, if you'll excuse me."
But none of them moved.
"Let me at least buy you a drink," one of them said.
I’d honestly had quite enough to drink. And if I was going to do anything else tonight with anyone…it would be with my lifeguard. I tried to sidestep the guys again, but none of them moved.
“Excuse me,” I said.
“Oh, come on.” The one that had offered me a drink put his meaty hand on my shoulder.
I suddenly felt claustrophobic. “Get off of me.”
“Don’t be like that…”