Except the flutter inside her felt way past fun. Way past harmless and a whole lot like…
No. No, no, no.
The L word was strictly off-limits. People falling head-over-heels in a few weeks happened only in stupid rom-com movies like Bud’s. Besides, letting her heart take the wheel now would be beyond stupid.
She was finally getting her life together. She had a plan. She had a real offer of a movie role. To toss all that aside now made no sense. She wasn’t running. She was pursuing the future she wanted and was meant to have.
Besides, her mom had believed in love and look how that turned out.
Think positive. Better things are just around the corner.
“Thanks for the reminder, Mom,” Mandy whispered to herself. Yep. She needed to keep to the course she’d set, think with her head and not her heart. That was the way ahead.
Still, as she turned the corner onto Concord Lane, she couldn’t help thinking more about the situation between Alex and his dad. It would make her feel better about leaving if she knew they’d made amends. She still didn’t know exactly what had happened between them, but whatever it was could be mended, couldn’t it? And given how Alex had opened up to her in other ways, it was only a matter of time until he told her about the day he was injured.
She hadn’t talked to Alex’s dad in years, but from the few mentions Alex had said over the past few weeks, she’d gathered his dad still lived on the family estate outside town. Maybe she’d contact him, just to test the waters, see if the break could be healed between him and his son. Not that she liked to meddle in other peoples’ business. That was her Mom’s thing, not Mandy’s. But Alex had come so far, she hated to think of him getting lost in the shadows of his anxiety again if she took the part in Bud’s movie, or worse, when she left Heavenly Falls for good. And sure, he still had his friends and his siblings, but that was different. He needed daily companionship, warmth, and caring. That wasn’t meddling. That was being a good friend, right?
Dr. Scofield had said earlier that you couldn’t force people to face their issues before they were ready, but you could still nudge them slightly in the right direction. The thought of going behind Alex’s back made her knees wobble, but that was nothing compared to the gut-wrenching guilt she’d feel if she went off to Tennessee without at least trying to help Alex.
She arrived at the house and went upstairs to shower and change, still stewing over her decision. By the time she fed Duckie then went downstairs to finish reading Bud’s script, she felt like a ton of bricks rested on her shoulders, all her energy from earlier drained. Yawning, she collapsed on the sofa and glanced at the clock on the wall. It was almost six now and she should probably eat dinner, but…
“Hey,” Alex said, distracting her. He leaned a shoulder against the doorframe, sexy as heck in a soft gray sweatshirt and jeans. “You’re home.”
“I am.” She set the script aside and stretched. “And I’m exhausted.”
“Guess it’s good I picked up dinner then, huh?” Alex set two bags from her favorite sub shop on the coffee table then took a seat on the end of the sofa, pulling her stockinged feet into his lap to massage them. “Nothing bad I hope.”
“No.” She closed her eyes. “Just a lot of stuff going on.”
“Yeah?” His thumbs kneaded her sore arches and toes, and she couldn’t contain a blissful sigh. “Anything I can help with?”
“You already are, thanks.”
He patted her feet then set them aside to point at the bags on the table. “I got meatball subs from D’Angelo’s.”
Mandy grinned. “You’re wonderful.”
He shrugged, then leaned in to kiss her before standing. “Let me get some plates and napkins while you relax.” He returned a few moments later with the stuff plus two bottles of ale tucked under his arm. “How about a picnic in the backyard?”
“Really?” She glanced out the windows. “It’s kind of cold.”
“I’ll keep you warm,” he said, with a naughty wink. “Plus, there’s blankets.”
How could she refuse that offer? She couldn’t.
Later, with her stomach full and her heart near bursting with affection and appreciation, Mandy lay back atop the warm fleece Alex had spread on the grass and stared up at the emerging stars. Too soon, this would be over, so she wanted to savor it while she could.
Alex nestled in beside her, nudging her shoulder with his. “You good?”
“Excellent.” Mandy moved into his arms and laid her head on his chest, her palm pressing over his heart. “Thanks for dinner.”
“My pleasure.”
They lay there, sharing body heat, as darkness gathered and a chill set in.
“I’m so happy you came to the Playground today.”
“Me too. It was nice.” Alex lifted his head to meet her gaze. “Never thought I’d enjoy hanging out with kids like that, but I did. Chen’s quite a handful.” He kissed her forehead then lay back to stare up at the sky.
“They all are.” Mandy smiled. “But they’re a great group. Especially considering what they’ve been through living in the homeless shelter with their parents and all.”
“Yeah.” His deep voice rumbled beneath her ear. “That’s tough. Maybe that’s why I could relate to Chen so well. We’ve both been through stuff.”
Her breath caught, hoping he might finally open up about his injury. She didn’t want to push him, but she desperately wanted to know the truth. The moment stretched taut, same as his muscles beneath her, then it all finally relaxed.
He took a deep breath and said, “So, about what happened to me…”
She closed her eyes and said a silent prayer of thanks, gratitude filling her. “Go on.”
“I was working an embezzlement case for the IRS. The defendant was a mid-size manufacturing company. We had tons of hard evidence against them. The case should’ve been cut-and-dried—an easy conviction. Except…”
“Except it wasn’t,” she whispered, filling in the gap when he hesitated.
“No. It wasn’t. Mark always suspected the owners had ties to organized crime, but we couldn’t prove it.” He took a deep breath, his arm tightening around her. “The weather was perfect the day of the trial—blue skies, sunny with a chance of rain later in the afternoon. Weird how I still recall those details, right?”
“No, not weird.” Mandy pressed her hand over his chest, hoping to calm his raging pulse. “Trauma does that.”
He closed his eyes, a shudder running through him. “Two FBI agents were stationed at the entrance to the courthouse and another two were inside already. Security is always tight since nine-eleven. We should’ve been safe.” His heart raced beneath her palm, and she pressed closer into his side, hoping to give what comfort she could. “Mark and I were both late. The latch on his briefcase broke and we were crouched on the sidewalk, gathering up files when the attack started. That’s probably what saved us.”
His words were rapid-fire now, rushing together in panic. “The guy just kept firing, firing, firing. Mark took a bullet in the right shoulder, and I covered him. Jack dragged him behind some bushes. Then the guy aimed at me. Everything went black. I thought I was dead. I thought we were all dead.” He swiped his free hand over his sweaty forehead, fingers shaking, his voice strained. “Four days later, I woke up in the ICU. I needed three transfusions, but I survived.”
“Oh, Alex.” Mandy held him tighter, her arms locked around his waist. “I’m so sorry.”
Finally, he relaxed into her embrace. “Other people outside didn’t make it that day. They died there on that sidewalk. For a long time, I wished it was me instead.”
“Don’t say that.” She raised her head to look at him, her expression grave. “Don’t ever say that.”
“Afterward, I couldn’t stop thinking about what happened, couldn’t stop remembering every detail. The docto
rs prescribed counseling, but I just couldn’t. All I wanted was to go home, go back to my life. Except, life was never the same again. People treated me differently because of my leg. Even Felicity couldn’t handle the anxiety and the nightmares. She left me. Then my dad…” Alex swallowed hard, his face pale. “My own father told me to man up and get over it. I tried, Mandy. I swear I did, but nothing helped. Nothing except solitude.” He sighed and shook his head. “So, when your mom left me half this place it was a godsend. A new chance to start over, to prove I could handle my life on my own without help from my father.”
Mandy winced. “He should never had said that to you.”
“No, he shouldn’t. But he doesn’t matter anymore.” He was quiet a moment, then squeezed her closer, his hand at the small of her back. “Not with you here. You threw my plans for a loop, did you know that?”
“Sorry.” Mandy hugged him back, that niggle of worry over his father dimming the happiness inside her. He said it didn’t matter anymore, but she didn’t believe that. Couldn’t believe that. But now wasn’t the time to discuss it. Not with his hands on her and his heart beating strong and steady beneath her cheek. She snuggled closer. “But I’m also not sorry.”
“Why am I not surprised?” He snorted and raised a brow at her, then lay back again to stare up at the stars. She pressed her face into his chest before resting her chin on his pecs as his fingers traced lazy circles up her spine. “So I’m thinking maybe it’s time to try another adventure.”
“An adventure?” She rose up on her elbow to stare down at him. “Seriously?”
“Seriously.” He grinned, his teeth white and even in the moonlight. “When’s your next day off?”
“Monday.”
“Perfect. How about we go into the city and visit the art museum? I hear they’ve got a great new Renoir exhibit.”
“But what about the crowds?” She sat up and faced him, her pulse stuttering. “Are you sure you’re ready for that?”
“Not completely, but I think I’m ready to try.” He gave a crooked half smile. “I have a friend who works in security at the museum. The exhibit’s usually open only to groups on Mondays, but he said he’ll let us in during the morning for a private showing. We’d have the whole exhibit to ourselves.”
“Wow. That would be amazing.” Mandy did her best to hide her excitement and failed, clapping her hands. “I forgot to tell you earlier, Alex, but I’m so proud of you. Getting back out into the world again after what you’ve been through.” She kissed him then cupped his cheek. “Thank you for telling me all of that. I know it wasn’t easy. And thank you for letting me be a part of it.”
“Stop making such a big deal.” He grumbled and pulled her back down to his chest. “It’s embarrassing. And don’t get too hyped about the museum, either. It’s just one day.”
“Okay. I’ll try.” But as she lay atop him, listening to the steady thump of his heart, she couldn’t help thinking that it was a huge deal indeed. And if he was going into Chicago, then maybe getting him to reunite with his dad wasn’t such a crazy idea, either. She’d think more about it before she decided, but the possibilities filled her with an eagerness she hadn’t felt for a long time. For now, though, she channeled that energy into more pressing matters. Namely the press of his body against hers and the electric connection shimmering between them tonight. Mandy snuggled her head under his chin, completely content. “I’d love to go with you to Chicago.”
He rolled her beneath him, enveloping her in his warmth. “You would, huh?”
“Yes, I would.” She looped her arms around his neck and wrapped her legs around his waist. “You make me happy.”
“Yeah?” Alex traced his fingers up her sides, nuzzling the spot below her ear that always made her shiver. “Bet I can think of one thing that would make you even happier…”
Chapter Ten
The next morning, Alex felt better than he had in months. After visiting the Playground the day before and his talk with Mandy last night, a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. And sure, there were still issues to deal with, but they didn’t seem quite so daunting at the moment.
He called an attorney about the QR Contracting situation and had a new HVAC contractor shore up the foundation until the new boiler could be installed. He’d even contacted an appraiser about coming out to look at the house and give them a new market value after they’d finished with the renovations. The insurance company would want that and he’d need it, too, for buying out Mandy when all this was over.
Over.
His stomach rolled and those shadows he’d banished began to creep in around his edges before he forced them back. No. It was fine. Everything was fine. The past few weeks together had been amazing, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t walk away, wouldn’t walk away, at the end. It’s what he’d promised to do, and he was a man of his word. Besides, things had been going remarkably well lately, and he wasn’t a guy who trusted luck. Not anymore. Eventually it would run out because it always did. It wasn’t a matter of if, only when. What they had worked, because it was fleeting. No strings, no problems. Best not to tempt fate by wanting more, since changing the rules could make the whole thing crash down around him, no matter how great a future with Mandy in it might sound, right?
Right.
Shoulders back, he sat down at the kitchen table to make a dent in the emails he’d ignored for the past couple of weeks. His brother Dave’s birthday was coming up. He needed to call him and send a card. He wondered if they’d celebrate at his dad’s house again this year like they used to growing up.
Longing stabbed him in the gut before he shook it off. It was all good. He’d invite Dave and Staci over once the house was finished. Nicole, too, and whoever she was dating this month. Maybe Mark and Jack as well. If Mandy was still around, they could cook a meal together. It’d be great to have everyone around again. He smiled. Funny how being alone wasn’t as attractive as it had been.
In fact, the trip to Chicago was as much a chance for him to stretch his proverbial wings as it was to thank Mandy for showing him that maybe the world wasn’t such a horrible place after all. Never mind that his whole day brightened when she smiled. Never mind that her blue eyes made his pulse race and his hopes soar.
He didn’t love her. He respected her. He cared about her. He was grateful to her. That was all.
And when the time came, he’d let her go, because that’s what they’d agreed to.
…
Mandy took an Uber across town after her shift at the Playground on Thursday, still not 100 percent confident it was the right thing to do, but unable to think of another way to get the ball rolling. The car dropped her off in front of the grand, two-story Noonan estate in a posh older subdivision, and Mandy stood before the place, biting her lip. Alex had told her why he’d broken off his relationship with his dad, and yeah, it was pretty awful. To dismiss another person’s pain and experiences like that was wrong. No two ways about it. But so far, she’d heard only one side of the story. His father had always seemed kind to her, so there had to be more to it than that. Besides, people changed. Alex certainly had. Maybe his father had, too. Life was too short to hold grudges. Alex still loved his dad, needed him, too, even if he was too stubborn to admit it.
Before she could rethink her actions, Mandy walked up to the front door and rang the bell, bouncing on the balls of her feet while she waited for someone to answer. As far as she knew, Alex’s father hadn’t remarried after her mom divorced him, but maybe he was dating someone now.
The door opened and Alex’s father peered out. The resemblance between him and Alex was still strong as ever. He was basically just an older version of his second son.
“Mandy?” he asked, frowning before pulling her into a big bear hug. Man, he gave the best hugs, and she’d missed them. “What are you doing here? I tried to talk to you at your mother’s funeral, but there were so
many people.”
“I’m good, thanks.” She gave him a firm squeeze before pulling back. “How are you?”
“Good. Good.” He stepped aside. “Please come in.”
“Are you sure?” She tucked her hair behind her ear again to hide the slight tremble in her hands. “I should have called first, but I thought I’d take a chance.”
“No. I’m glad you did. I’m actually off today to get some things cleared up at home.” He led her through the elegant foyer. She’d always loved the parquet floors here, gleaming beneath the twenty-five-foot ceilings. Back in the day, she’d pretend this was a stage and act out plays for the family in here. The acoustics were awesome, as was the decor. Sunshine streamed in through the high windows and gorgeous fall flowers filled elegant vases against the walls. In fact, the whole house had seemed the same as she remembered—like Buckingham Palace, only homier. “The house is still gorgeous, as always.”
“Thanks.” He took her into the enormous kitchen and gestured for her to sit on one of the stools at the large granite-topped island. “Can I get you anything to drink?”
“No thanks,” she said. “I just came to talk.”
“About anything in particular?” He took a seat beside her, still handsome even in his seventies. “How are things with your mother’s estate? Settling everything can be overwhelming. I remember that from when my first wife passed away.”
“Yeah, it’s been a lot.” She clutched her hands atop the cool stone, wondering once more if she’d made the right choice in coming here without talking to Alex first, but in for a penny, in for a pound, as her mom always used to say. She wasn’t sure how much he knew about Alex’s current situation, so she started at the beginning. “My mother left me half of an investment property in town.”
“Really?” Alex’s dad frowned. “That seems odd.”
“I thought so, too,” she said, biting the inside of her cheek. “Especially since she left the other half of the house to your son.”
“Alex?” Mr. Noonan stared at her a moment, then looked away again, scowling. “I see.”
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