"I'm not some baby you know!"
"No, you're not but you're naive as fuck!"1
"Oh really?"
"Yes! Really! Now just say it! I don't have all day and I'm not going to let you drag this on, looking at me with disgust from here on in. So, let's deal with it now."
"Okay! Fine! You are disgusting! Don't you know homosexuality is wrong?! You cannot like the same sex, that is just vice!"25
There were gasps from everyone at the table. Peyton looked at Casey and felt sorry that she had instigated this scene because Casey was visibly crushed by the information she just learned about her best friend. Her best friend, who's opinion matters the most to her, hates homosexuals. And she is a lesbian. She was planning on telling Sadie but now she knows she can't and it broke her heart much more than she thought it ever could.
"It is not wrong and you cannot tell me who I can and cannot like. Who I like may be wrong only because the person is an idiot but then that does not make me any different from you."
"You are nothing like me! I am straight! I have an awesome, caring boyfriend! Boy being the operative word!"1
Peyton laughed a dry, humorless laugh. "Trust me honey, we are very similar. Liking someone who doesn't give a rat's ass about our genuine happiness."
"Don't call me honey!"
"Why? Because I'll put my gayness on you and you'll catch the homosexual disease? Please, you're not even my type. And if I wanted to turn you I'd kiss the fuck out of you just the right way to make you beg for more."8
"You cannot turn me! No girl can! I love guys!"
"Right... whatever you say babe."
"Don't call me that!" Sadie was genuinely upset, irritated and disgusted by Peyton. "I have a boyfriend!"
"Oh boo hoo. I had a boyfriend too. His name is Adam Bennett."3
"You see, you had a boyfriend! You like guys you're just rebelling and think you like girls. Probably just trying to hurt your parents or something."4
"Had being the operative word! And it was not by my choice. My parents forced me. You do not know everything!"
"That's because you're parents are wise. They know homosexuality is wrong!"
Peyton's anger was flaring now and she tried her best to control it, "you don't know fuck shit about my parents you idiotic, naive, homophobic bitch!"
"Hey hey calm down boo!" Kimberly intervened, "I told you to tell her not beat her with your words."
"And she's not beating me with hers?!"
"I never said that but you are being an asshole now."
Peyton sighed and just as she was getting up Justine stopped her with a question, "you said your ex boyfriend's name is Adam Bennett?"1
Peyton sat back down, "yes. At least somebody picked up on that." She looked at Sadie again, "does that name ring any bells for you?" After getting no response she continued, "isn't your precious boyfriend named Adam Bennett?"2
Sadie, for the first time was at a loss for words as the full blast of what Peyton was saying dawned on her. It cannot be the same person. Not my Adam. He's a sweetheart. He loves me. He told me so himself! She's lying. She's just jealous.1
"He's two timing you Sadie. Just like he did with me."
"Well, he isn't with you anymore, if you're even telling the truth, so he's not two timing me."
"Sadie, come on, don't be so childish. Adam is not a good guy."
"Wait, how do you even know who my boyfriend is? Are you stalking me or something? Oh my god! You pervert! That's why you couldn't talk to me right?!"
"Please, don't flatter yourself. I told you, you're not my type. And I happened to see you two in the cinema almost a month ago." Peyton proceeded to describe what both Sadie and Adam had on that day and what movie they watched and how Adam came late and what his excuse was.
Sadie's expression showed that she was convinced but she refused to admit it. "So, even if all of that is true, there is no proof that he was your boyfriend. You're just jealous of us."
"Jealous? Why in the fuck would I be jealous?!"
"Easy, you're jealous of me because I have a great boyfriend and you want him as your own and since you insist on being a lesbian, you're jealous of Adam because he has me and you wish you did. But you never will! Because that is wrong and disgusting and you will be punished for being gay!"7
Peyton laughed, "I'll never be jealous of you, Adam is a fucking asshole! And why are you so insistent on the fact that I like you? It would be flattering to have a girl lust after you huh? So you could satisfy yourself that you are so precious that guys and girls alike can fall for you? Please! Maybe some other girl will like you but honey, not this one! You would suck at being a lesbian!"7
Peyton could not take it anymore, the accusations, the judgments, the lying about liking Sadie, her exaggeration and bitchiness, everything. She got up and threw her trash away when she returned for her bag she glared at Said and said, "don't worry your pretty little head, I'm already being punished." She stormed away mumbling and cursing under her breath.1
Chapter 18
Kimberly caught up to Peyton and got her attention only by walking in front of her and stopping. "What the fuck was that Peyton?!"
"Leave me alone Kimmy."
"No. That was uncalled for. Sadie did not deserve that. What has got into you?"11
"Oh, and none of this is your fault right?"
"How is any of that my fault?!"
Peyton mocked Kimberly as she repeated her words from earlier, "Don't worry Sadie. She has nothing against you. She is just rendered speechless by your absolute beauty. What the fuck was that Kimmy?! That's why she is so hellbent on the fact that I like her! Now she thinks I'm a perverted stalker!"
"Oh, and that's my fault? You being a creep by not talking to her, always stealing glances at her and going off on her about Adam without giving any proof had nothing to do with it right?"
"Whatever! You could have backed me up you know!"
"How?! You two were going at each other like vicious rabid dogs. No one could have gotten a word in edgewise!"
"Fine! It's all my fault. I'm sorry for blaming you and sullying your good name. Forgive me, I'm a bitch."
Coming to Peyton's aid, the bell rang and she took that opportunity to say she didn't want to make either of them late for class and rushed off in the direction her next class; which was to her joy in the opposite direction to that of Kimberly's.
After school Peyton quickly packed her bag and was thankful for the teacher keeping Kimberly back long after the bell had rung. She sent Kimberly a quick text as she hurriedly made her way home.
Captain shit is in my habour. I'm rushing home to let him dock and drop anchor in the comfort of our toilet at home.2
As soon as Peyton got home she went directly into the bathroom and took a shower in an attempt to clear her head. The shower did not do much for her mental state but at least she was clean and feeling fresh.
When she stepped into her room ready to change she was startled by Kimberly's presence. Kimberly sat on Peyton's bed in wait for her arrival from the bathroom.
"I have to change Kimmy." Peyton stated and in her head that statement made it clear that Kimberly should leave.
She did not. She continued sitting there looking at Peyton.
When Peyton pointed at the door Kimberly shrugged, "it's not like I've never seen you naked before."
Peyton sighed heavily and ignored Kimberly as she went about changing her clothes. She refused to entertain Kimberly before she was fully dressed.
"What?!" She said with great irritation once she was done and faced Kimberly again.
"We need to talk don't you agree?"
"No."
"Come on Peyton, I'm sorry okay. But we have to talk about this. You can't keep all that anger pent up inside..."
Peyton cut her off, "I can and I will. There's nothing to talk about."
"Come on boo, I'm your best friend. I know this is eating you up on the inside. I know Sadie hurt you. Please, talk to me." Kimberly pr
actically begged by the end.1
Peyton felt her emotions rising once more but she definitely did not want to deal with them. She did not want to feel all that hurt right now. She did not want Kimberly to see her cry. Again. She wanted to be alone. She wanted to forget.
"Leave me alone Kimmy."
"Boo, please!"
"No Kimmy! Just leave me alone. Please!"
Kimberly stepped close to Peyton and tried to pull her into a hug but Peyton dodged it and pointed at the door. She felt herself breaking at Kimberly's kindness and she refused to let it get to her. "GET OUT KIMBERLY!!!" She yelled only because she knew that's what it took to get Kimberly to listen to her.
The hurt look on Kimberly's face and the slouch in her posture as she left the room broke her heart but it's what she needs right now. For her own sanity.
When Mr and Mrs Dexter got home Peyton still refused to come out of her room. She refused to accept the food they placed by her door. She refused to talk.
"WOULD EVERYBODY JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! PLEASE?!" She screamed through her closed door when, for the sixth time someone knocked on her door and tried to talk to her.4
She felt trapped. She felt as though she was losing her mind. She hated that feeling. She wanted to be free.
By eleven o'clock, when she was satisfied with how quiet everything was and so was sure everyone had fallen asleep, she sneaked out of the house and ran.2
The cold wind in her face felt revitalising. Every time her feet hit the road she pretended she left a piece of her troubles right there. She knew where she was going. She had scored this new town for a new secret hiding place like the one she had in their old town.
When she got there she admired her surroundings. The place was beautiful. It was secluded, off a track and seemed to not have too many visitors. If any.
There were trees and bushes but enough clearing to see to walk about. Peyton ventured further this time than the last two times she had visited. As she walked she heard the distinct babbling of water. Following the sound, she eventually came upon a small brook.
She found a nearby tree and sat below it leaning up against its trunk.
She felt a strange sense of peace.
She also felt guilt for treating Kimberly and her parents the way she did. She hated herself for her behaviour.
She sat there for quite some time thinking about everything in her life. As she thought, a pressure began to develop in her chest and it only grew with the racing of her mind. Thinking of Sadie for some reason brought the tears, which were threatening, crashing down her cheeks. She sobbed loudly; only because she was certain no one was around.
"Come on Peyton! Compose yourself!" She scolded when she had had enough of her self pity.
She went to the little brook and wet her face washing the tears away.
When she sat back down under the tree she pushed her hand into her jacket pocket and pulled out an almost full bottle of cough syrup.
She looked at the bottle and spoke, "well, you're better then nothing."
After uncapping the bottle, she raised it in the air, "cheers!" She proceeded to down almost half of the contents of the bottle in one mouthful.10
She started singing to herself the only song she felt it fit to sing at that moment, Crawling by Linkin Park, while she sipped on the remainder.3
♪♫♪♫♪♫
Crawling in my skin1
These wounds they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, confusing
This lack of self control I fear is never ending
Controlling
I can't seem to find myself again
My walls are closing in
Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced
That there's just too much pressure to take
I've felt this way before
So insecure
♪♫♪♫♪♫
She sighed heavily as she rested her head against the tree and let the empty bottle roll out of her hand. "I am so fucked up..."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Peyton awoke with a start. Where the fuck am I?
She looked around and it took only a few seconds for her to recall last night. Right...
She got to her feet and stretched. I don't feel like going to school today...
She decided to honour her feelings. She took a very slow and casual stroll back to the house which took nearly an hour.
When she entered the house she checked the time. It was half past ten in the morning. She made a beeline for the bathroom to wash off the dirt from sleeping on the ground.
When she got to her room she was greeted by a note stuck to her door.
She took it down and read it.
Peyton, we are all very sorry for pushing you last night. We are sorry you felt that you had to run away. We love you and we care about you. Please let us know that you're okay. We are worried sick!
It was signed by all three of the Dexter's.
There was the guilt again.
She put the note on her desk and changed her clothes. Her phone was on the night stand next to her bed where she had deliberately left it last night.
She sat on her bed and picked up the phone and sent a quick text to both Mr and Mrs Dexter.
Hi, I got the note. I am safe and at home. I am very sorry for worrying you all. Please forgive me.
She sent Kimberly a different text.
Hey Kimmy. I hate the way I treated you yesterday. I am terribly sorry. I could never forgive myself and I do not expect you to. I do not deserve you or your parents in my life.
By the time she had finished sending Kimberly's message both Mr and Mrs Dexter responded to her. They both said something along the lines of they're sorry and it's okay, they're not mad just leave a note or something to let then know when she leaves the house and where she goes.
She didn't answer partly because she didn't know what to say and partly because she got a response from Kimberly.
Hey boo!!! I'm the one who should be apologising. You warned me but I still pushed you. I forgive you and I hope you can forgive me. Where are you now? Where'd you go last night?
It's not your fault. Really. I have nothing to forgive you for. I'm at home. Don't worry, I was safe.1
Oh, okay. Well I'm glad you are and were safe. Are you coming to school? Everybody is asking about you. And they say hi.
Peyton checked the time and realised it was indeed lunch time at school.
No. It's too late now to make sense anyhow. Who is everybody?
True. Casey, Justine, Kirk...
Oh. What about Sadie?
She knew she should not ask but she just could not resist.
Uh... She's just in a bad mood.
For some reason that bit of information saddened Peyton. More.
What kind of bad mood?
She's not talking to anyone. She seems upset, hurt and angry.4
Peyton's heart ached her just a little more.
Did she say anything about me or yesterday's incident?
No, but once or twice she glanced across at your seat. And she glared at Casey when she said that she would call you later.
Oh... Okay. Thanks Kimmy. I think I'm gonna lie down now. I feel tired. See you soon.
Okay boo. I love you. Can't wait to see you :) don't forget to eat!2
Peyton didn't bother to answer because she had no intention of eating but would not say that.
Chapter 19
Peyton forced herself to talk to the Dexters' when they got home because she knew that she was a bitch to them the night before and she felt that she had to make it up to them. What she did not force herself to do though was eat. She just could not. She apologised for it and tried not to feel too guilty for wasting the food.
She made a quick excuse that she was tired and had to prepare herself for her session with the psychiatrist in the morning s
o she would go to bed early. Everyone seemed to buy her story. That, or they realised that she just wanted to be alone and so let her. Either way, she was grateful to them for their understanding.
Just as she was mounting the stairs, Mrs Dexter called her back.
"Yes?" She questioned from the doorway to the dining room.
"There was a bottle of cough syrup in the medicine cabinet and it's not there anymore. Do you know anything about that?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry, I forgot to mention, I thought I was coming down with something so I went to take some but it slipped out of my hand and spilled in the sink."5
"That's okay sweetie. We were just wondering."
"Okay. G'night." Lying is way too easy for me.3
As she lay in bed trying not to think about certain things and a certain person in particular, her phone rang. She groaned as she began to reach across to her night stand to get it. Who the fuck is calling me? The only person who ever calls me in right here. Must be a wrong number then.
She satisfied herself with the thought that it was a wrong number and pulled her hand back waiting for the phone to stop ringing. It did but a minute later it began to ring again. What the fuck! You have the wrong number! Stop calling.
Eventually it stopped ringing only to begin again a minute after.
In frustration she reached across and answered, "stop calling! You have the wrong number!"
The person answered calmly, "no I don't."3
"Casey?"
"Hi Peyton."
"Hey... sorry about that I thought it was a wrong number..."
Casey chuckled, "I realise. I told Kimberly I'd call you tonight."
"She told me. Sorry, but I did not believe you."
"That's okay. People lie a lot. Anyhow, how are you feeling?"
"Fine."
"Really? You don't sound fine to me."
Peyton gave no response.
"I missed you at school today."7
"I can't understand why."
"You're my friend. I like hanging out with you."
"You've only known me for three days."
"Yeah, but that doesn't stop me from liking you and missing you."
"Okay."
I Stole Your Girlfriend Page 8