by Ella Goode
“I’m still mad at you,” I let him know.
“I’ll make it up to you,” he growls.
How can I be so upset but also looking forward to the making up part?
Chapter Fifteen
Sebastian
I sit her down on the sofa in her living room and kneel down to start a fire.
“It’s summer.” But even as she says that, she draws a blanket across her knees.
“I know. I like the sound of it. Plus, it gets cold at night.” I flick the used match inside and watch it burn up before standing. “You eat yet?”
“No. I guess I haven’t, but I don’t know how hungry I am.”
“Too busy trying on fancy underwear?” I cast her a hooded look on my way to the kitchen.
She ducks her head. “I forgot about that.”
“I haven’t. Hope you’re still wearing it.”
She peeks under her shirt. “Guess so.”
My dick turns instantly hard. I go over to the refrigerator and stick my head inside the freezer portion.
“What are you doing?” she asks.
“Looking for some ice cream,” I lie. The cold does nothing for my erection. In the photo she sent me, her nipples were erect like she’d been exposed to the cold or...aroused by the silk rubbing against it. I groan.
I still can’t get over the fact that she ran to me. That I was the only person she’d let close to her. It was me she sought out.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” I slam the freezer door shut and jerk open the refrigerator door to grab the milk. Will I make it through this night or will I die of blue balls? Stay tuned for an update.
“You sounded like you were in pain. I moved the Tylenol into the third drawer instead of the one on the right, if you need it.”
She’s so helpful and so clueless I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I let the milk heat up while I pour some cocoa and sugar into the bottom of a mug. The stash of marshmallows still sits in the top cupboard near the fridge. I plop a couple of those into the mug and wait for the milk to get hot. Once it’s steaming, I pour the hot liquid into the mug and add a tiny bit of vanilla. I carry the mug over to the sofa and curl her fingers around the handle.
“Drink,” I order. I wait for her to take a sip before talking. “I’m sorry I didn’t call you, but I just found out that Adam got released myself. I’m not sure how he got out early. Like you, I’d been told he was being released after the wedding.”
She takes another sip before settling the mug between her palms. Her blanket-covered knees are a whisper away from mine, but she doesn’t seem interested in closing the distance between us. I feel like I’ve messed something precious up before it even had time to build.
“I wanted to take care of the Adam situation before I came here. I hadn’t realized you had your own sources.” It wasn’t that she found out from someone else, but that she didn’t trust me that is cutting my insides with a sharp knife.
“It was my trauma counselor.”
Ah, fuck, that explains things. The knife slides out only to return when she exhales heavily and says, “But, you know, it hurt that it wasn’t you. I feel like you don’t trust me.”
“Me? Not trusting you?” I turn swiftly and stare at her in surprise. “How so?” I’d trust my life to Violet.
“You think I’m weak and have to be protected and coddled.” She lifts the hot cocoa. “I guess I haven’t done much to convince you otherwise. I can’t leave this place, and the news of Adam getting released made me faint. Maybe you treat me like I deserve to be treated.”
I stare in astonishment at her. I knew she’d been feeling low and that her confidence wasn’t strong, but the amount of self-loathing in her voice is painful. “Babe. I didn’t tell you because I wanted to take care of the situation before I came over here, but let me say first that Adam’s actions are not your fault. There isn’t anything you did that caused his behavior. And you aren’t weak. Fuck that. You’re the strongest person I know. You were harassed for months, made to be afraid of your own home. Going for a walk in your neighborhood or even getting into your car became a traumatic event. Yeah, it’s made you wary of the outside world, but that’s absolutely fucking normal. It’s not like you refuse contact. People come and go here. You accept new people easily. You’re not just surviving, you’re thriving. You and Eden are going to launch a new business. How are you weak and doing all this shit simultaneously?” I shake my head in real dismay. “I should’ve told you about Adam, but I felt guilty.”
“Why?”
“Because I failed to protect you, and I continue to fail at protecting you.” I pluck the cup out of her hands and set it on the table so that I can lift her into my lap. “I get that you think being with you is a sacrifice, but there’s nothing in the outside world that I want more than you. I’m not giving up anything to be with you. You’re a prize. I like that you’re here, that I know you’ll always be here. Sometimes my job can get nuts, but the surety of you being in this one place at all times sets my heart at ease. You’re perfect just the way you are.” I press my lips to her cheek and then her jaw and then the side of her neck. I allow myself to linger there, breathing in her warm, sunny scent. When my lungs are full, I pull her close, tucking the top of her head under my chin. “If you were any more perfect, I’d have to put you in a museum. The few flaws you do have, like not believing in yourself more, make you human. If you can accept me with all my warts and flaws, why can’t I accept you whose one flaw is that you are still holding me at arm’s length?”
“There’s not even enough room to slide a piece of paper between us,” she mumbles against my chest.
“Which is how it should be at all times.”
“Even when you’re doing your bodyguarding?”
“Sure. I’ll make a giant Kevlar backpack, and you can hang out there while I do my job.”
She laughs at the ridiculous image. “Seems like I’d slow you down.”
“Nah, you’d be like a jet pack.”
She laughs harder, her joy vibrating through my body. Her giggles die off, and she asks in a small voice, “Are you really sure you want me in this state?”
“Will you accept me being dictatorial and not telling you everything all the time because I’m trying to protect you?” I counter.
“Is that the deal we’re making?”
“It is.”
She leans back and stares me in the eyes, searching for something. Finally, she nods. “All right. I’ll take your flawed self if you accept mine.”
“No take backs,” I warn.
“No take backs.”
Chapter Sixteen
Violet
How could I ever take it back after that declaration he made to me. I feel whole for the first time in a long time. So much of my life has been put on hold because of what happened. Sebastian being one of those things. The most important.
Even in the midst of my freak-out, he was all I could see. I need him, and I know without a doubt that will never change for me. If he wants to protect me then I’m going to let him, and I’m going to let him do it his way. For so long he’s worked around my restrictions and way of life so I could be comfortable.
The least I can do is give him the same back. To trust that he’ll share with me what he thinks I truly need to know, knowing that whatever he does is always in my best interest. I’m going to start right now by not asking about what he did today. I know he did whatever he thought was necessary where Adam is concerned. Of that I have no doubt.
“Do you want me to draw you a bath or something?” He brushes a piece of hair out of my face, tucking it behind my ear. This man is always trying to take care of me.
“I think you’re just trying to see my new panties,” I tease him. I can see the inner battle raging in his eyes. He wants me, but he doesn't want to push. He’s always the gentleman when it comes to me, but I want to see the other part of him. Tonight, I’m going to show him we’re done waiting. That I ne
ed him the same way he does me.
“I always want to see all of you, Vi.” He brushes his thumb across my lips. I part them, stealing a taste of him with my tongue. He presses his thumb more into my mouth, and I suck as hard as I can. He lets out a low groan. His whole body flexes as desire takes over. I release his thumb, kissing the tip before I try to slip off his lap. He stops me, not wanting me to go anywhere.
“I thought you wanted to see.” I slip my hands up under his shirt. I’ll never get enough of his hard body. His size scares me most, but it’s never made me feel anything but turned on.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” I put my hands over his, lifting them off my hips so I can slip off his lap and stand in front of him. I wait for the shyness to overcome me as I start to pull my clothes off, but it never comes. Sebastian’s fingers grip the edge of the sofa as he tries to keep himself seated. “So?” I ask, doing a small spin. “Does it look better in person?” I swear the man looks as though it’s taking everything he has not to lose control.
“Angel.” His voice sounds strangled. So close. Only a little more and I’ll have him breaking for me. The only one he would ever break for.
“I’m not too sure about the bra, but what girl loves a bra?” I reach behind me, unhooking it and letting it fall away. Before it can hit the floor, Sebastian is on me. My feet leave the floor as he lifts me into his arms. I wrap myself around him. His mouth takes mine in a possessive kiss as he carries me through the house heading toward the bedroom.
He only breaks his mouth from mine to toss me onto the bed. I let out a small laugh at how quickly Sebastian is getting undressed. When the last of his clothes hit the floor, my heart starts to race in anticipation. The throb between my thighs becomes almost unbearable.
Our eyes connect as we feel the same rush of emotions. Both of us are finally getting what we’ve wanted for so long. I drop back onto my elbows so that I can take him in. I want to try to savor every second of this.
“I love the panties, angel.” His big hands wrap around both my ankles. “But I want your pussy bare.” He pulls me down the length of the bed before he drops to his knees on the side of it. Before I can react, I hear the fabric of my panties rip and his mouth comes down on my sex.
His fingers dig into my thighs, keeping me planted where he wants me as his mouth devours me. He is relentless as he sucks and licks me as though he were starved for me. It’s not long before he sends me over the edge. Still, he wants more. His tongue circles my clit before he sucks it into his mouth. He takes long pulls of me, his tongue flicking back and forth.
It’s all too much. I cry out his name, lost in all the pleasure. The second orgasm hums through my body. I’m in such a state of bliss that I don’t realize he’s lifting me until I’m in the center of the bed.
“You with me?” He brushes my hair out of my face. His cock starts to push into me with nothing between us. Neither of us will have it another way from this day forward. We both know what we’re doing and what it could mean.
“I’ve been with you since that first day, Sebastian. You’ve owned me. I’ve always been yours even if we hadn’t been together.” I knew there would never be anyone else for me. I don’t care who thinks it’s crazy, but I’ve loved him from the start. Thought I was doing the right thing by not tying him to me, but really, I’d only been hurting us both.
“I love you so damn much, angel,” he says before he thrusts all the way inside of me. I cry out, my nails digging into his back as he claims me. “So fucking perfect,” he growls. “I love you.” He says over and over as he presses kisses anywhere his mouth can reach. I can feel the strain of his muscles under my fingers as he fights to stay still inside of me.
My body starts to adjust to his size, and the pain starts to fade away. The only thing I feel now is full. I know this man is trying to take it slow because he doesn’t want to hurt me, but I want more. My body demands it.
“I love you too, Sebastian.” I lift my hips, making this powerful man groan. I might be pinned to the bed beneath him, but I’m in full control. “Now move.”
“Anything for you.” He pulls out and thrusts back in. I gasp at the sensation. It’s different from any of the others he’s given me before. I lift my hips, meeting each of his thrusts. “Angel,” he calls between clenched teeth. “I need you to come with me.”
He starts to thrust harder, hitting something deep inside of me. My breath catches a moment before his fingers graze over my clit.
“Sebastian!” I cry out his name as the orgasm hits me. It rushes through my whole body. Sebastian lets out a deep groan as he comes inside of me. His warmth fills me and connects us in ways that will forever be unbreakable.
How have I lived all of these years without this? It was stupid to fight this. It was a battle I never had a chance at winning. I belong to Sebastian, and he won’t have it any other way.
Chapter Seventeen
Sebastian
Leaving Violet behind in the warm bed might’ve been one of the hardest things I had to do, but the Adam thing is a string that needs to be cut off. Violet may not get over her agoraphobia, which is fine, but knowing Adam is running around free isn’t helping. I need to be able to sleep at night, too, without wondering every second if someone’s going to creep into the house and try to hurt Violet again. No matter how good the security, how many redundancies, safety depends on people, and people are fallible. The best thing to do is eliminate as many hazards as possible.
According to the schedule I got from an informant at the police station, the cop that had been with Adam was Carrie Dell, a parole officer with ten years under her belt. She works the morning shift of six to two. It’s ten, so she should be in the thick of things and Adam should be alone. A day nab is harder to pull off than a night one, but you have to be adaptable in these situations.
The parking lot at Adam’s apartment complex is nearly empty. There’s a late model Dodge and a new pickup. The rest of the slots are empty. The new pickup belongs to someone named Theodore Leabo and the Dodge to Fran Thompson. I run a quick name check on both people, and neither appear connected to Adam. Today’s as good a day as any. I tug down the bill of my brown cap and heft the cardboard box full of cupcakes into my arms. At the door, I press the buzzer with my elbow. Fran answers right away.
“Triple Fast Delivery here. Need your signature.”
“Oh? But I didn’t order anything.” The woman’s voice sounds older.
“Maybe it’s a gift?” I suggest. “It’s addressed to Fran Thompson. That you?”
“That is me. Come up, I guess?” She buzzes me in.
I take the stairs, dropping a smoke bomb on each floor, with two on the third floor. Fran’s on the fourth. Wispy tendrils of cloudy air snake across the floor. Fran sniffs the air as she opens her door. “Smells funny out here.”
I sniff my shoulder. “Not sure ma’am. I did shower.”
“Not you.” She gives off an uncomfortable laugh. “Anyway, where do I need to sign?”
“Right here.” I shift the box onto my hip and hand her an electronic pad. She scribbles her name across the screen and takes the box. As the door closes, I can hear her muttering about how she didn’t order anything. The smoke is growing thicker by the time I reach the first floor. Any minute now, the fire alarms will go off. A high-pitched siren sounds just as I’m leaving.
I smile to myself. Right on time.
Back in my truck, I switch out of my brown delivery uniform into my fire department gear. When the firetruck rolls up, I slide into the growing crowd. Soon enough, Adam emerges from the building, dressed in a pair of jeans that aren’t completely buttoned, a faded green sweatshirt and unlaced boots. He has his phone to his ear. I adjust the gas mask over my face and walk over to him.
“Sir, you’re too close to the building. Please come this way.” I motion him backward.
“Any word on what the cause is?” he asks, moving in the direction of my truck.
“No, sir. We won’t know until forensics shows up.”
“Forensics?” His eyebrows go up. “Is this arson? Cuz I know a guy who has it in for me. You hear of Miles King?”
“Sure.”
“He’s got a beef with me.”
“Miles King?” I don’t even have to work to inject the surprise into my voice.
“Yeah. His sister fell for me, but I wasn’t interested so he’s concocted this whole story—” He cuts himself off. “Never mind, but if you’re looking for causes, you might want to check his alibi.”
We’ve reached the truck, out of sight from the rest of the crowd, and Adam hasn’t noticed.
“Will do, sir.” I reach out and jab him with my sedative syringe.
“What the fuck?” he cries and slaps a hand over his arm.
“Must’ve been a bug bite,” I say and punch him in the chin. That and the drug knock him out cold. I stuff him in a gun box in the back and close the lid. I rejoin the fire squad and stay with them until the all clear is given. Back at my truck, I pull on my delivery clothes again and drive north.
At the outskirts of Aidon Kasteros’ territory, I’m stopped by one of his crew. “You got business in the area?” The young man leans his head inside the window to peer in the back.
I show him the medallion that Kasteros gave me a few years back. It’s good for one safe passage. The kid takes it from me and bites into it. “Real,” he grunts and hands it over to his partner. “Where you headed?”
“Warehouse. I’ve got some trash that needs to be taken care of.”
“We doing it?”
“No. I’m just borrowing the facility.”
“You’ve got an hour.”
The warehouse isn’t a warehouse but a mundane-looking house with a row of pine trees blocking the east and south sides. There’s enough of a barrier that if you park at the right spot in the back, no one can see what you’re unloading from the back of the truck. A curtain flicks above me as I’m tugging the gun case out from the back, but no one comes to bother me. I enter a code hidden behind some bricks, and the cellar doors slide open. I shove the case down the steps and close the doors behind me.