by R. E. Butler
His wolf snarled unhappily. How could she think she wasn’t strong? She’d shown herself to be the epitome of the word. “You used the Protectors for what their purpose is. That’s not weak, it’s smart. You were caught off guard by the attack and outnumbered, and aside from those two things, you’re also human. Shifters naturally possess more strength.”
Her mouth turned down, her eyes filling with tears. “How can I be a leader of people who could kill me so easily?”
“Because you were born for this, love. I promise. My... former brother, and those who followed him, aren’t typical of our kind. I’d never think of using a mate – human or otherwise – to hurt someone else. It’s a bitch move.”
She chuckled a little. He brushed the tears from her cheeks.
“Listen, I failed miserably to protect you. Your injuries and the scent of your blood is making my wolf want to go on the warpath.”
“You didn’t fail. How could you know that woman was spying on his behalf?”
“Exactly.” He tweaked her chin. “I’ve been a wolf my entire life. I’ve never known a situation like what happened tonight to have ever occurred. If I couldn’t anticipate a retaliatory move like this, how could you?”
She leaned into him, hugging him tightly. “You’re saying I shouldn’t beat myself up because they already did?”
His upper lip curled. “Yes.”
“I still kinda want to cry.”
“Your adrenaline is gone, you’re safe. It’s okay to feel relieved by that.”
“You’re pretty sweet, Joss.” She went onto her toes and kissed him.
“Just for you.”
He helped her out of her dress then stripped himself, ducking under the spray and turning the shower head until it was a soft mist and not hard needles of water pounding his skin. She joined him, and together they gently washed each other, cleaning the dirt and dried blood from their skin and cataloging their injuries. Once out of the shower, she wrapped a towel around her hair and dried her body, then donned the hospital gown he pulled from a cabinet for her. He found a pair of scrub pants and put them on.
Jeanie sat on the bed, and Paula checked her over, while Joss kept a watchful eye on the exam.
“Is Sarah going to be okay?” Jeanie asked.
“Yes. She’s banged up a bit, but she shifted to heal her injuries. The tumble down the stairs could have killed her, so she’s thankful to be alive,” Paula said as she bandaged Jeanie’s wrists.
“What’s the verdict?” Joss asked, when the doctor had finished her exam and tending to Jeanie’s wounds.
“Nothing too serious, fortunately.” She walked to a medicine cabinet and removed a small bottle. Then she filled a cup with water and brought both over to them. “Keep an ice pack on the eye, it’ll heal in a few days. I put ointment on the lip, you can apply it every few hours to help promote healing. The wrists are bruised and scratched, keep the bandages on for a day. The biggest issue is the bruise on the stomach, but nothing inside is affected, just the skin.” She handed two white pills to Jeanie and the water. “Pain pills. They’ll knock you out. You can take one every six to eight hours. The best thing is rest.”
Paula handed the bottle to Joss. “Thanks,” he said.
“Now for you,” Paula said.
“I’m fine.”
“That bruise on your side begs to differ,” Paula said.
“I had to get checked out,” Jeanie said when she’d popped the pills and drained the cup. “All’s fair.”
He snorted. “Even without shifting I have accelerated healing. I’ll be fine. There’s nothing to be done for the cracked ribs anyway. They just have to heal.”
“You should shift,” Jeanie said.
“Not a chance.”
“Stubborn man,” she said, narrowing her eyes but giving him a secret smile.
“It’s what makes me a great alpha.”
Paula shook her head with a chuckle. “If you need me, holler. I won’t offer you pain meds because I know you won’t take them, but you can take two if you want.”
He put the bottle in the pocket of the scrubs, then lifted Jeanie into his arms. “Thank you.”
“It’s what I’m here for.”
Joss carried Jeanie to their home and laid her in bed. She yawned and gave him a sleepy smile. He fetched an ice pack from the freezer and wrapped it in a kitchen towel. He put it in her hand, and she laid it gently on her eye.
“Why did Paula say you wouldn’t take the pain pills?”
“Because they mess with my wolf’s ability to be alert. I’d sleep too deeply, and it would make me feel unsettled.”
“Can I ask you about something that was said at the challenge?”
He sat on the edge of the bed and stifled a weary sigh. “You want to know about my children.”
“How old was your daughter when she died?”
He nodded and rubbed the space over his heart. “Leah was ten. When Marianne died after a lengthy battle with infection, Leah and Jesse were distraught and they needed me. I was too wrapped up in my own grief to be a good parent and I threw myself into being alpha. I left them with pack members while I spent days in meetings with the council, doing anything to numb the pain of Marianne’s loss. Jesse grew colder as the months went by, but Leah was a happy little girl for the most part, especially when she was climbing a big, old tree in the paddock. I was having a meeting with the elders and she was doing what she always did – climbing that tree. It had rained recently, and the bark was loose on some of the upper branches. She slipped and fell, dying instantly.” It still replayed in his mind sometimes, hearing the crunch of the bark as it slipped from under her feet and her screaming. He’d raced for her but hadn’t been able to get to her before she fell.
“I’m so sorry.”
He grimaced, remembering how angry he’d been about everything. He’d chopped down the tree, spending hours and hours hacking away at it, digging into the ground and pulling the roots out. He’d never wanted to see it again because it was a reminder that he was a terrible father.
“I overreacted to what happened to Leah by paying even closer attention to Jesse. He was twelve when she died, and by that time, though, he was emotionally distant from everyone, hardened and turning ruthless. He only got worse as time went on.”
“Is what Sid said true? Did you kill him?”
“Yes. I want to say I didn’t have a choice, but the truth is that as alpha, there’s always a choice.” He scrubbed a hand through his hair, a little bit of worry biting at his neck that Jeanie might think him a monster for what he’d done. But she’s already heard the news in the worst of ways, and he would never lie to her. “Jesse was a loud-mouthed troublemaker. He had a sweet side when he was a kid, but after losing his mother and sister, that part of him died. He had a wolves-rule mindset. He’d go out of his way to torment someone he didn’t like. No matter how often I spoke to him about his behavior, he was never sorry. I don’t think he was ever going to be suited to be alpha, he was too volatile.
“A year before we started the VIP tours, Jesse was out with some pack members at a bar. A group of the gorillas was there as well, celebrating the birthday of one of the males. From what we heard about the incident, a human female offered to give the gorilla a kiss, and Jesse demanded he get one as well. When she refused, Jesse and his cronies got aggressive. Human bouncers stepped in, and Jesse and the wolves overpowered the humans and caused a lot of damage to the bar. The gorillas put a stop to the fighting, paid the owner for the damages, and got the wolves out. The wolves were punished for starting a small riot in a human business by not being allowed to shift on the next full moon.”
“That’s bad?” she asked.
“It makes us feel like something’s missing if we can’t shift on the full moon.” Joss stopped speaking for a moment and Jeanie touched his hand. He brought it to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “Jesse held a grudge against the gorillas after that. When we started the VIP tours, Jesse was a guide. F
or the most part he did well, although he could be aggressive with the human females, mocking or teasing them in a way that sounded innocent but wasn’t. At any rate, Zane, one of the gorillas, found his soulmate in a VIP patron. Jesse knew that she was Zane’s soulmate and – in full view of Zane in his shifted form and the rest of the gorillas – tried to hurt the female. Zane ripped the fence apart and rescued her. She passed out in fear, of course, and Zane carried her into the paddock and down to their private area to recover.”
Jeanie sucked in a sharp breath. “Was she okay?”
“Yes. Just freaked out.”
“What happened?”
“We have cameras on each Jeep in the tour, so we got the footage and showed the alphas. Jesse broke three of our laws, and the sentence was to wear a special collar called a Flayer, which prevents shifting, for three years – one year for each broken law. Not shifting on the full moon makes our wolves crazy. We can get away with it if we’re regularly shifting like for the VIP tours, but the rules of the Flayer state that the wolf in question can’t leave their home for any reason. He was effectively under house arrest for three years – no shifting, no communing with the pack, and no finding out if a human coming into the park for a VIP tour was his soulmate.”
“It sounds like a terrible punishment.”
“It would be hell,” Joss agreed. “It should have been over. Jesse should have accepted his punishment and ridden it out. Instead, he snuck into the security office and took the footage of the attack, then edited it so that it appeared as if Zane attacked Adriana, and Jesse was a victim. Then he leaked it to the human media.”
“Oh!” Jeanie said. “I remember hearing about that. I had no idea it was this park, though. How awful! What did Jesse hope to accomplish?”
“He wanted to make Zane pay.”
“I don’t understand.”
“If the human authorities believed that a natural gorilla had broken through the security fence, attacked a tour guide, and kidnapped a guest, they could demand that gorilla be killed. Or removed from the park. We don’t have any natural gorillas here to put in place of our shifters. It was terribly dangerous for all of us. We do have laws that, if broken, will result in death. One of them is purposely causing our people to come under investigation by humans in any way.
“I want to say I had a choice. That I could have let Jesse live and simply found another way to deal with the fallout, but the truth was that I couldn’t. I couldn’t justify letting him live when he was a danger to all of us. It was the hardest, worst thing I ever did, and I didn’t think I’d survive it myself. He was defiant to the very end. I think... he wanted me to kill him. The Flayer was too much of a punishment for him to endure, and he wanted to cause as much trouble for our people as he could on his way out of this life.”
“You said it’s tough to be an alpha. This sounds like a prime example.”
“Indeed.”
She sat up, wincing a little, and hugged him. “I’m sorry he put you in the position to carry out the punishment.”
“Me too, sweetheart.”
“Was the park okay after that? What happened with the media?”
“As part of the alphas’ damage control, the news media was told that Adriana wasn’t harmed, and neither were the guide and driver. The cover story was that Adriana had been working closely with the gorillas for months, and the footage had been altered by the guide in retaliation for not getting a salary increase. We invited the media to the park to show them that Adriana was fine. She was in the gorilla paddock acting as a zookeeper. We had Jasper, one of the pack, stand in for Jesse who looked similar enough to pass for him. Jasper explained that he faked the dash-cam footage and apologized for the ruse, and then Adriana spoke to the reporters about what happened. It seemed to appease everyone, and we were fined for the broken fence, but otherwise we didn’t have problems.”
“It would have been awful if his actions had led to the shifter secret being discovered.”
“Exactly.”
She settled back on the mattress and was quiet for a long moment. “I don’t understand everything you deal with as alpha, but I can see why you had no choice. He was dangerous and you had so many people to think about. I’m sorry you went through it. And I’m sorry that Sid tried to use what caused you grief against you to hurt me.”
He bit back a snarl at the mention of his brother. Shaking his head, he said, “So much loss.”
“We just need to move on. I’m safe, you’re safe, the pack is safe.” She gave him a sleepy smile, the pain meds clearly kicking in. “I don’t think less of you for what you went through. I think you’re the strongest person I’ve ever known, and I don’t just mean physical strength. You’re alpha for a reason. You make the hard choices.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before. My brother should never have had the chance to use that against me.”
“I understand why you didn’t. You wondered what I’d think of you, or if I might leave you.”
“Exactly.”
“I can’t think of anything that would make me walk away from you, Joss. You’re everything to me, and you’ve got my heart.”
“You have mine, too.” He leaned over and kissed her gently, mindful of her injuries. “Thank you for caring enough about me to hear me out.”
“Of course.” She stifled a yawn and closed her eyes. “Will you stay with me?”
“First I need to check on things in the paddock, I’ll be about a half hour. I’ve got Protectors coming to stand guard outside. I don’t want you to be afraid of anything.”
“The bad guys are all gone. You put down the threat. I’m the least scared person around.”
“I love you, Jeanie.” He stood and looked down at his beautiful soulmate. “I’ll be right back.”
“I’ll be right here. Alpha.” Her voice slurred at the end, and she fell asleep. He watched her for a moment, his wolf of a mind to stay right there and keep watch over her. But duty called, and he needed to ensure his people were taking care of things.
Giving one last look at his sleeping beauty, he strode from the bedroom and closed the door silently behind him. Outside the house, he spoke to the Protectors who were going to keep watch. Although he didn’t think there was any danger to be had now that everyone involved with his brother was dead, for his own peace of mind he wanted extra eyes on his soulmate. His wolf wouldn’t be happy until he was back with Jeanie.
Back with the female who held his heart firmly in her hands.
Chapter Sixteen
Jeanie smiled from behind the omelet station in the marketplace. The man holding out his plate had an eager gleam in his eyes. The line for the newly established omelet station was very long, and she couldn’t help but love how much the shifters enjoyed her cooking. When she’d first become the alpha female of the pack, she’d spent two weeks getting to know the pack members. She’d never know what it was like to be a shifter, but she could still be a great leader with Joss at her side.
And then she’d gotten antsy. Joss worked in the finance office and handled a lot of day-to-day park operations. She couldn’t ask him to hang out with her all the time, and she hated when they couldn’t be together as much as they both wanted for one reason or another. So she’d asked him to help her find something to do within the park that wouldn’t make his wolf crazy. It was out of the question for her to be topside in the park while he was underground in the offices.
She’d been in the marketplace having breakfast with Anke and Jess when someone complained that there weren’t enough cooks for the breakfast rush. Jeanie offered to help and had really enjoyed getting back to cooking. That day, Marcus asked her if she’d like to take over the breakfast shift and be the team leader, and she’d jumped at the chance.
The first thing she’d done was get an omelet station set up, and it was the most popular station for breakfast.
She flipped the omelet that was stuffed with four different meats and a ton of cheese. “August, right?” sh
e asked the big guy across from her.
There were so many shifters in the park she thought it would take forever for her to learn all their names, but working in the marketplace was helping her get to know those outside of the pack. There were many omelet station regulars, and the gorilla shifter was one of them.
“Yep. How’s your morning going?” He flashed her a smile and dropped his gaze to the sizzling pan.
“Busy, but that’s the way I like it. Yours?”
“Better once I get an omelet.”
She checked the omelet, topped it with a bit more cheese, and then slid it onto his waiting plate.
“Thanks, Jeanie.”
“Enjoy!”
The next male in line greeted her and gave his order, and she got to work. Ninety minutes later the breakfast rush was over, and Jeanie was able to take a break. She grabbed her favorite metal water bottle with a painted picture of a wolf on it and went to find Joss.
She knocked on the open door and he looked up, smiling with a soft growl when he met her gaze.
“Hello, sweetheart,” he said.
She walked behind the desk and bent to give him a kiss, and he pulled her into his lap. She giggled and kissed him more fully, then set the water bottle on the desk. Running her fingers through his hair, she said, “Hi to you, too.”
“You smell like breakfast meats. I could eat you up.”
“Lemme shut the door.” She wiggled her brows, and he barked out a laugh.
“Such a tempting vixen.” He rested his forehead against hers. “We’ll have to wait until lunch to fool around. Unfortunately I have to go meet with the construction company for a walk-through of the apartment complex.”
“Can I join you?”
“I’d love the company.”
She kissed on him a bit more and climbed off his lap. They walked through the offices and up into the employee cafeteria. A golf cart with the park’s logo on the front was waiting outside, driven by Jupiter. In the passenger seat, Caesar, the lion alpha, turned and greeted them.