by L. S. Pullen
When I walk back into the living room, Ethan lets out a loud whistle.
“Are you serious? I have no makeup on, and I might as well have been dragged through a hedge backwards,” I say, stuffing my keys and purse into my bag––along with my lip balm and hand sanitiser.
“Are you fucking kidding? You’re every guy’s wet dream,” he says, reaching for the front door.
I can’t help but hide my smile. I know he’s trying to make me feel better, and I can’t lie, it’s working.
Once we’re in the car, he refuses to tell me where we’re going. I have my window slightly open, and a familiar smell assails my senses. It’s nostalgic, reminding me of candy floss and fair rides. I open my eyes, and they go wide as he pulls into an open gravelled car park.
“Are you serious?” I say, unable to hide my excitement.
“Yep,” he says, finding a space.
“Oh my God, I haven’t been to a funfair in years,” I say, rushing to unclip my seat belt.
He’s barely switched off the engine, and I’m out of the car, taking in the fairground before me.
“So, you like?” he asks, coming around to join me.
I turn to face him. “Yes, I love,” I say, unable to keep still.
He takes my hand, and I practically skip to the entrance, where he pays for our admission and grabs a huge bundle of tickets for the rides.
“Okay, where to first?” he asks.
I tug him towards the dodgems, and he hands over the tickets.
“I won’t go easy on you,” he warns with a hint of mischief.
“Ditto,” I say, climbing into a car and plugging in the seat belt over my stomach.
The ride ends after being rammed into repeatedly, and Ethan comes over to help me from my car.
“Ever the gentleman,” I say in a teasing tone.
“Only outside of the bedroom,” he replies with a wink, and I can’t hide my blush.
He walks us down the steps, holding his hand out in front of him.
“Ladies choice,” he says, bowing, and I can’t help but laugh as I look around at which ride to choose next.
Ethan
Her smile alone is enough to bring me to my knees, and we’ve only been on about four rides so far.
“Are you hungry?” I ask, wrapping my arm over her shoulders.
“Yes, I’m starving,” she says, looking up, her eyes sparkling from the reflection of the fairground lights.
“How about there?” I point over to a burger van that has a good selection and some picnic tables off to the side.
“Perfect,” she says, and it’s hard to ignore the skip in her step. It warms my chest; I love seeing her so carefree, especially after having such an awful shift––it brings me joy.
I order our food and drinks, and she tries to pay, but I’m not having any of it. This was my idea. I wanted to treat her and cheer her up. She made sure I was all right when she found out about Clara, and yes, I’m aware she ended up in my bed, but if I can’t be here for her now, when can I be?
She can’t eat her burger fast enough, and I swear if we were alone, and she was making those kinds of noises, I’d bend her over this table and take her from behind until she was screaming my name. It’s hard to ignore my attraction towards her, and not just physically. She’s intelligent, funny, and kind.
But I’ve also noticed when she’s been with Olly, I’ve seen her hold back.
At first, I wondered if it was because of us sleeping together, but I soon realised it wasn’t, and if I’m honest, I struggle to act indifferent around her. How can everyone else not see how drawn to her I am? She’s a beacon—a lighthouse, and I’m the lost fucking ship.
“Are you having a good time?” I ask, stealing a fry from her burger box.
“Yes, thank you.” She sighs.
There’s a slither of burger sauce on her lower lip, and I can’t hold back. Leaning over, I swipe my tongue across her full lip, causing her breath to catch in her throat. I pull back.
“You had a little sauce right here,” I say, tapping the corner of her mouth.
When she pokes out her tongue to lick her lip and it touches my thumb, I know I’m a goner. There is no way I can hold back. I lean in, holding her cheek in my palm and kiss her fervently. I have to remind myself we’re not alone and force myself to slow down, aware we’re out in public. The last thing I want to do is embarrass her in front of all these people, but I’d be lying if I said the thought of public sex with her doesn’t turn me the fuck on. I pull out of the kiss, leaning my forehead against hers, both of us breathing heavy.
“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself,” I say as I pull back.
Her smile tells me she’s not even the slightest bit remorseful.
“Come on, want to win me a prize?” I ask, collecting our rubbish and tossing it into the bin.
She stands, laughing. “Aren’t you meant to be winning me a prize?” she says with mock chagrin.
“If you want me to,” I say, reaching for her hand and leading her over to hook a duck. We work our way through some of the games, and I’m sure most of them are rigged, but the laughter spilling from Lottie’s beautiful mouth is the only win I need.
Moving from stall to stall, we end up with an oversized teddy, a flamingo which she insists she’ll give to Molly-Mae, and a small bear holding a heart to its chest.
We pass a couple with their young son, asking if he can win a toy, but his parents say they’re out of tickets, and something tugs at my heartstrings. I remember all the times my mum felt guilty for having to say no to Henry and me. We learnt early on not to ask as it hurt her to tell us no, and the truth was we had everything we needed.
“How much do you like this teddy?” I ask Lottie.
“I’m not emotional over it. Why?” she replies honestly, and I smile. Letting go of her hand, I quickly rush back over to the stall.
“Hey, mate, could you do me a solid?” I ask the attendant.
“We don’t do exchanges,” he replies.
“No, it’s cool. I don’t want to exchange it. If I give it back to you and slip you a score, can you make sure when that kid comes over, he wins it?” I say, pointing out the little boy.
He smiles and nods as I pass him the twenty-pound note and the toy.
“Excuse me,” I call out to the couple with their son and jog over. “Did you drop these?” I ask, holding up a strip of tickets.
The woman shakes her head, and so does the man. “No, they’re not ours,” she says.
“Oh, well, we were just leaving,” I say, holding them out to her. “Shame them going to waste.”
She looks to the man, who nods and takes them from me.
“Thank you,” they both say in unison.
“No worries, and if you want a sure bet on winning something, check out the stall behind me,” I say, pointing over my shoulder with my thumb.
Lottie is staring at me when I approach her. She goes up on her tiptoes, wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me down for a kiss.
“That was really sweet,” she says, pulling back.
“It was nothing,” I reply, looking back just as the boy is handed the teddy, the look on his face worth it.
“You’re just being modest,” she says, grabbing my hand.
“Candy floss or the big wheel?” I ask.
She pretends to think about it, tapping her chin with her forefinger.
“Big wheel and then candy floss.”
Laughing, I pull her to my side, and we make our way in the direction of the big wheel.
“Ethan?” I hear my name and look around for the source. “I thought that was you,” Jase says as he pulls me into a quick hug and pats my back. “And Lottie, right? Olly’s sister?” he asks, smiling, holding out his hand.
Jase is a big guy and quite intimidating if you don’t know him, but his smile is warm and friendly, and Lottie doesn’t hesitate when she shakes his hand.
“Yeah, nice to meet you,” she replies.
/> He glances back towards me. “So, rumour has it you’re back at the gym?” he questions.
“Just for a little light sparring and helping Henry with his training.”
Lottie steps aside as the kid comes ploughing through us, the mum heavy on his heels, and Jase laughs. “Well, I’m always up for sparring,” he says.
“Yeah, that sounds good,” I reply.
He points over his shoulder, “I need to get back to the Mrs before she kicks my arse, for leaving her alone with the kids. I just wanted to say hi.”
“Okay cool, man, enjoy your evening.”
“And you,” he says, nodding to Lottie before he leaves us alone.
I grab her hand and we join the queue for the big wheel. When I peer down, she’s worrying her lip. “You all right?” I ask.
She peers up at me. Her violet eyes are so dark. “How does he know Olly?” she asks.
I wrap my arm over her shoulder. “He’s a doorman at Charlie's Bar, and he used to be a professional fighter. It’s how we all know him.”
She looks concerned, and it takes me a moment to catch up. “Oh shit, you’re worried about being seen with me? That he might say something to Olly?” I ask, and I hate the thought.
I hold my breath as I wait for her to reply.
“Are you?”
Without even having to think about it, I answer her honestly. “No. No, I’m not.”
Reaching between us, she links our fingers. “Then neither am I,” she replies with a shy smile.
Her answer is one I didn’t know I needed. We haven’t talked about us, but the more time I spend with her, the more I realise that maybe deep down there is a part of me that would like to find out if there could be an us, and the revelation momentarily floors me.
Chapter Twenty
Charlotte
Rachel was adamant I join her on a night out with her and her friends, Felicity and Sophie. Of course she said I could invite someone, so I dragged Vi along. Not that she’s complaining.
So here we are at Sophie’s fiancé’s place, Charlie’s Bar. It’s how Olly met them—he used to work here, but he’s gone full time at the gym now, which means he has extra time to spend with Rachel and Molly-Mae.
We had a table reserved for when we got here, and Mavis gave us a round of cocktails on the house. Charlie’s compliments, of course––not that we’re complaining.
“Charlie couldn’t get me out of the house fast enough,” Sophie says, rolling her eyes.
Felicity laughs, pausing mid-sip of her cocktail. “Yeah, only because Nate and Olly are there for a cards night,” she replies.
“They do realise they have Selene and Molly to entertain, as well as Buster, right?” I ask.
“I bet a tenner they all end up watching Frozen, and Molly has their nails painted flamingo pink before the night is out,” Rachel says.
I laugh. There isn’t anything Olly wouldn’t do for that little girl. Hell, he jumped in front of a car.
“Something tells me you sent her prepared,” I say, laughing, grateful Olly found someone like Rachel.
“So, Lottie, are you seeing anyone?” Sophie asks, and everyone’s attention turns to me.
I have to choke back the cocktail, which just went down the wrong hole.
“Hmm, define seeing someone,” Vi says, and I elbow her gently in the ribs, but she just smirks.
“I’m sleeping with someone, but it’s not serious, just mutually beneficial,” I answer honestly with a shrug, opting out of offering any more details.
“Oh, to be young and carefree,” Felicity says.
Sophie pulls a funny face and then turns to her. “Easy, you make it sound like we’re already using a free bus pass.”
Felicity brings her palm to her chest. “But soon we will be, and that shit’s scary.”
Sophie just laughs. “You’re beyond dramatic. We’re only twenty-five, for crying out loud.”
“So anyway, Rachel told us you’re a paramedic, Lottie. That’s amazing. What about you, Violet? Are you a paramedic too?” Felicity asks.
She shakes her head. “Hell to the no. I literally pass out at the sight of blood,” she replies with a mock shiver. “I’m just doing bar work at the moment, waiting on that dream job,” she says matter of fact.
“What is it you want to do?” Sophie asks.
Vi’s cheeks heat. “I want to work in theatre. I’m just trying to get my portfolio updated. My headshots are ridiculously out of date,” she says.
“Do you have a photographer?” Felicity asks.
I don’t miss the way Vi’s shoulders deflate. Between student loans and bills, there’s not much left over. Even with our rent split between the two of us, it’s still expensive.
“No, I’ve been trying to save, and that shit is expensive.”
“Not if you know people,” Sophie replies, smiling as she stares back at Felicity.
“I’m a photographer. If you’re willing to let me take some shots of you for my website, I’m more than happy to get your portfolio together.”
Violet’s pupils dilate. “Are you shitting me?”
Felicity shakes her head. “I shit you not. Here, let me give you my number. Call me next week and we’ll sort something out.”
She rummages through my clutch for her phone. Vi didn’t see the point in us both bringing one, so as usual, I’m playing mum. Unlocking her screen, she passes it to Felicity.
“She’s amazing. You should see the pieces she took for my deli,” Soph says.
Rachel nods in agreement. “She took the one I have of Molly, Olly and me,” she says, breaking out into a fit of giggles. “Oh my God, that rhymed.”
“How much alcohol did Mavis put in that Sex on the Beach?” Felicity asks as she takes another sip of her own.
“I don’t know, but since having Molly, my tolerance isn’t what it used to be,” Rachel replies.
“Here, here,” Soph says, holding her glass to Rachel, and they clink together.
“I wonder if I’ll be the same when I have children,” Felicity wonders out loud.
Rachel turns her attention to Felicity, her mouth agape.
“Shut the front door. Are you and Nate talking about having a baby?” Sophie asks, her eyes wide as she bounces in her seat.
“We are, but it’s early days. We’re just going to see what happens,” she says with a wistful smile on her face.
“Now, if that isn’t a cause for celebration, I don’t know what is.” Rachel gets to her feet. “I’m getting us a round of shots,” she declares, and a few heads turn our way.
Sophie groans, but I don’t miss the smile on her face.
“I’ll help,” I say, and we make our way to the bar.
“They seem nice,” I say.
She nods. “Believe me, they really are. I’m lucky to have friends like them.” She smiles softly before a glint of mischief shines in her eyes. “So, this guy you’re seeing, what’s he like?”
I clear my throat. I don’t want to lie to her, but I also don’t want her feeling as though she’s stuck in the middle if she were to find out who he is.
“He’s nice, but it’s just a bit of fun,” I reply with a shrug.
“Yeah, well, just be careful. Sometimes, even when it’s fun, we can catch feelings without realising it, and I don’t want you getting hurt.”
I nod, but the truth is I’ve already passed the point of no return, and as much as I should probably take a step back, I can’t seem to stay away from Ethan.
Rachel orders a round of apple sours, and then she stares at me.
“Shit, I know that look. You’ve already caught feelings, haven’t you?”
I let out a groan. “Yes, but please don’t say anything, especially not to Olly. It really is complicated.” Even more so, seeing as it’s his best friends twin brother.
“I won’t, and mum’s the word. You can trust me. But speaking from experience, if you like this guy then be honest with him.”
I nod in agreement
, but I’m not sure I’m remotely ready to go there. Passing over my card for payment, she tries to tell me off, but I’m having none of it. “Wow, you really are your brother’s sister,” she says, laughing. I enter my pin and then she picks up the tray and we go back to our table.
We have a few more drinks––enough to feel more than buzzed. Rachel, Sophie and Felicity all take a cab back to Sophie’s, and Vi and I share one back to our place but stop for a chip kebab on route, and make sure to give our driver an extra tip.
Vi starts stuffing her face the minute we’re indoors, getting more down herself than in her mouth. It’s not long before her head starts to loll, and I know she’s ready for bed. Extracting the pitta from her fingers, I coax her to relieve herself before I manage to get her onto her bed, where she promptly falls face down.
I’m just getting rid of the leftover food in recycling when there’s a buzz from the intercom.
“Hello?”
“Hey, it’s me.”
It’s Ethan, and I’m momentarily stunned and don’t reply.
“Hello?” he says.
“Oh, sorry…” I buzz him up without saying anything more and then wait by the front door, keeping my eye on the peephole. I see him raise his hand and rap his knuckles, so I pull the door open.
“Hey,” I say, moving aside for him to come in. “This is unexpected.”
He smiles and pulls out his phone, swipes the screen and then turns it to me. It takes a minute for me to focus—a text asking him to come over for a booty call.
My cheeks heat, and I cover my mouth with my hand. I’ve sobered up a little since sending a message I have no recollection of.
“Oh my God. I am so sorry.”
He laughs, and it makes my lady bits flutter in approval.
“You’ve been drinking?” he asks.
I nod and hold up my thumb and forefinger as if to say a little, but I’m not fooling him. He shakes his head with a smile.
“I’m going to go, let you go sleep it off,” he says, hooking his thumb over his shoulder.
“No…” I lurch forward, and he staggers back into the wall, my body flush with his. “You don’t have to go. I’m fine,” I say.