by Jae
“We used to think humans can’t be dream seers either until Jorie Price taught us otherwise. I bet fifty years from now, a lot of what we believe today will be completely obsolete. But then it’ll be too late for Nyla and me.” She squeezed her eyes shut when tears started to flow.
Jocelyn slid closer and wrapped one arm around her. “Don’t take this so—”
The doorbell interrupted whatever Jocelyn had wanted to say.
“Great,” Shelby mumbled. “Is the rest of the pack coming to see if I’m still alive?” Her eyes widened. “Oh, shit. What if they discover the mate scent?”
“Stay here. I’ll get rid of them.” With one hand on Shelby’s shoulder, Jocelyn stood. She marched to the door.
Shelby rubbed her forehead and perked her ears as Jocelyn talked to the person on the other side of the intercom. But instead of her father’s baritone, another voice sounded through the small loudspeaker.
Nyla! Shelby jumped up so quickly that her vision blurred for a moment. She hurried to the door.
“Is that her?” Jocelyn asked, pointing at the door with her thumb. “Your human?”
Shelby nodded. “Please, you’ve got to promise that you won’t hurt her or tell others about us.”
Jocelyn stared at her. Her brow furrowed until she looked more like a pug than a coyote. “You make me sound like a bloodthirsty monster. Of course I won’t hurt her.”
Hesitantly, Shelby pressed the button that opened the front door. Her heart pounded as she waited for Nyla to reach her fifth-floor apartment.
“What is she doing here?” Jocelyn asked.
“I have no idea.” Had Nyla come to hear her out? Or to break up with her once and for all?
Shelby’s knees weakened. She clutched the doorframe.
The metallic whirring of the elevator stopped. Footsteps approached.
Shelby sent her cousin a pleading look. “Can you please go and leave us alone?”
“Oh, no, I won’t. I ...”
The footfalls stopped in front of Shelby’s apartment door. The jasmine scent became stronger, but this time, it wasn’t the lovely scent of fresh blossoms. Nyla smelled of wilted jasmine.
Shelby’s stomach felt as if it were filled with gravel. Nyla’s suffering. She swallowed. “Jocelyn, please,” she whispered before she opened the door.
Nyla’s cheeks were pale. Dark shadows lurked beneath her eyes. She smelled of salt as if she had done nothing but cry for the last five days.
Shelby barely held herself back from enfolding her in her arms.
They stood staring at each other without saying a word.
Jocelyn cleared her throat.
Nyla jumped and looked at Jocelyn, then back at Shelby. “Oh. I didn’t know you had company.”
“It’s okay,” Shelby said. “My cousin was about to leave anyway.” She emphasized the word “cousin,” not wanting Nyla to become upset at finding another woman in her apartment.
Jocelyn made no move to walk toward the still open door. She stared at Nyla as if she had never seen a human before. Slowly, she stepped closer and reached out her hand. “Hi. I’m Jocelyn, Shelby’s cousin.”
When Nyla took a step toward her and took her hand, Jocelyn’s nostrils flared.
Shelby wanted to grab her by the neck like an unruly puppy and drag her away from Nyla. I know what you’re doing, cousin. Go ahead and sniff her. You’ll see that I was right. Even the smell of tears and wilted jasmine couldn’t hide the mate scent.
When Jocelyn let go of Nyla’s hand, Jocelyn’s face was as pale as Uncle Jacob’s winter fur.
“Thanks for checking on me,” Shelby said. “And if you see my parents, please don’t mention this. Please.”
Nyla looked back and forth between them. “What’s going on?”
Neither of them answered.
Ignoring Nyla completely, Jocelyn stared at Shelby. “Are you sure that this is what you want? Even if our laws change one day, you’ll be even more of an outsider than you are now.”
“I don’t care.” Shelby held Jocelyn’s gaze. For once in her life, she wouldn’t submit to her pack’s expectations.
After a few seconds, Jocelyn nodded and averted her gaze. “All right. Whatever you want.” She headed to the door and stepped into the hallway. After two more steps, she turned. “I’ll think of something to explain the mate scent at the next family get-together.”
Again, Shelby clutched the doorframe as her knees weakened, this time in relief. “Thank you.”
“Mate scent?” Nyla whispered. “What are you talking about?”
With trembling fingers, Shelby closed the door. Now she was alone with Nyla, who expected explanations. Would she be willing to listen, or would she send Shelby away again? Slowly, Shelby turned around.
Nyla was still staring at the door, where Jocelyn had disappeared moments ago. Her scent revealed the confusion and emotional chaos that had to rage within her. She looked up.
For a few seconds, they looked at each other.
Finally, Nyla said, “Here. I brought back your shoe.” She handed over Shelby’s missing sneaker. “Goliath chewed it up pretty badly. I’m sorry.”
Shelby stroked the thoroughly chewed shoelaces, then dropped the shoe next to the coatrack. “I don’t care about the shoe. How are you?”
“I won’t lie and say I’m fine,” Nyla said. “I barely slept all week. I lay awake, thinking. I still don’t know what to think about all of this.” She waved her hand in a gesture that included Shelby and the door that Jocelyn had left through. “I’ve got so many questions, and I need some answers.”
“Of course. Whatever you need.”
Nyla stuffed her hands into her coat pockets. “If I ask you something, will you promise to tell me the truth?”
Shelby’s vocal chords felt frozen, so she just nodded.
Nyla leaned against the wall as if she needed its support. “At Halloween, when I saw the man in the parking lot change into ... a wolf or something like that ...?
Yes, of course! Why didn’t I think of that sooner? Shelby nodded enthusiastically. “I’m pretty sure you saw a Wrasa.”
“But you said it was just stress and exhaustion.”
Shelby swallowed. “I know. But … I lied.”
“I don’t understand any of this.” Nyla entered the living room, looking around as if she expected to find a pack of wolves waiting for her. She sat on the only armchair, so Shelby had no choice but to sit on the couch instead of next to Nyla, as she usually did. “There are people who can turn into animals?”
“Not just any people,” Shelby said. “Wrasa. Some of us can turn into wolves—or at least into something that human brains perceive as a wolf. Some Wrasa transform into tigers or bears. And some, like my cousin and me, turn into coyotes.”
Nyla clamped her lower lip between her teeth. “If that’s true, then why didn’t you show me? Couldn’t remember the magic spell or something?”
The old feeling of shame rose in Shelby. She studied the floor. “No. We’re not sorcerers. For us, shifting shape is as natural as breathing. At least for all other Wrasa. I’m the exception.” With her thumb nail, she painted invisible lines on the leg of her jogging pants. “I don’t know why, but it’s difficult for me to shift. My parents dragged me to every Wrasa doctor in North America when I was a teenager, but no one ever found out what makes me different.”
“And you’re really sure you’re not human?” Nyla looked at her as if she still hoped it was all just a very bad practical joke.
Shelby sighed. “Sometimes, I wish I was human. Unlike many other Wrasa, I like humans. Not all of them, but ... I like you.” She shook her head. “No. I love you. That’s why I didn’t want to lie to you any longer. I’m truly a Wrasa.” She held her breath while she waited for Nyla’s reaction.
“How do I know that’s the truth?”
Nyla’s distrust hurt, but on the other hand, it wasn’t really surprising. Humans were used to believing only what they saw with th
eir own eyes. “Think about it for a minute. I’m sure you noticed a few things about me that you found odd. You always tell me that I’m different from the women you dated in the past. Why?”
“Well ... For one thing, you never seem to mind playing cards with me and my grandmother instead of being alone with me.”
“I love being alone with you,” Shelby said, “but family is important. I enjoy being part of a pack after not really having that for so many years.”
“Pack ...” Nyla slowly shook her head. Her gaze darted back and forth. Lines formed on her forehead. “And you never complained about all the food my grandmother heaped on your plate. My exes sometimes looked like they were about to vomit, but you ...”
Shelby patted her belly. “I’ve got the metabolism of a Wrasa. The portions you normally eat for dinner are just a little snack for us.”
“Hmm. I thought it was because you are so athletic. Whenever we raced each other, you won without even getting out of breath. And you were fast enough to save me from that crazy cabbie.” Nyla chewed on her thumb nail.
“I’m not into sports,” Shelby said. “It’s just that physically, we’re superior to humans. That’s one of the reasons we keep our existence secret. Humans tend to hate what they don’t understand and to persecute what scares them.”
Nyla gnawed on her lower lip as if she had to digest the information. Finally, she looked up. “How many of you are there?”
“In the US, there have to be about,” Shelby paused to think, “three million.”
“Th-three million?” Nyla clutched the armrests with both hands. “But that means ... you’re everywhere! My neighbors, my friends, my colleagues ... everyone could be one of you!”
Nyla’s tone when she said “one of you” hurt. Shelby lifted her hands in a placating gesture. “Nyla, please. There’s no reason for paranoia. We’re not monsters who’re constantly out on the prowl, just waiting to slit the throats of innocent humans. Most of us just want to live in peace. We love our families, our jobs, and some of us, like me, even love humans.”
Nyla’s head rested against the back of the armchair as if it were too heavy to lift. “What does that mean for me? For us? Are you still the Shelby that I know?” She paused and then added in a whisper, “And love?”
“Of course I am.” If Nyla had been a Wrasa, Shelby would have gone over to her and let her scent speak for her. But humans couldn’t ascertain the truth of a statement with their noses, so she had just words to convince Nyla. “I love you from the bottom of my heart. If it had been up to me, I would have told you the truth from the start. But it’s not that easy. There are consequences if you’re a Wrasa who’s in a relationship with a human. That’s why I wanted to tell you before we ...” She pointed at the bedroom door.
Nyla kicked off her shoes and pulled her legs to her chest. She was still wearing her coat as if she needed its protection. “Consequences? What are you talking about?”
Her anxious expression coaxed a tired smile out of Shelby. “Don’t worry. You won’t turn into a coyote after I nibble on your earlobe or something like that. But we Wrasa have very strict laws. In the Middle Ages, we nearly became extinct because some humans found out about us and started a witch hunt. Since then, we protect the secret of our existence, no matter the cost.”
“No matter the cost?” Nyla wrapped her arms more tightly around her knees. “What exactly does that mean?”
“Our laws forbid close relationships with humans. The risk of being found out is too high. And if one of us violates the law and reveals our existence to a human ...” Shelby massaged her neck as a lump formed in her throat. “In the past, Wrasa who did such a thing were hunted and killed by the Saru. The same happened to humans who found out about us.”
Nyla let her head drop against the back of the armchair. She stared past Shelby as if she wanted to flee, but then she stayed where she was. Finally, she cleared her throat. “Saru?” she asked in a low tone.
“Soldiers who protect the secret of our existence. They’re not blood-thirsty killers, but they have killed humans in the past.”
Nyla swallowed audibly. “In the past? They don’t do that anymore?”
“A lot of things are changing. The Saru were ordered not to kill humans, but I wouldn’t stake my life—or yours—on it.” Shelby stood, circled the coffee table, and knelt in front of Nyla to look into her eyes. “You’re risking a lot by being with me. We’ll never be able to have a normal relationship. I can’t introduce you to my friends or my family. You can’t stay at my place because my Wrasa neighbors might see you. I’ll even have to move so that Lennard and Clara can’t smell your scent on me.”
“Your neighbors are shape-shifters too? That elderly couple? But ... but they ... they were a bit grouchy but otherwise seemed pretty harmless.”
Shelby smiled humorlessly. “They are harmless. I’m just not sure they would keep quiet if they find out we’re in a relationship. We would always have to hide.” She swallowed and forced herself to continue. “If you want to break up now that you know everything, I’ll understand. You deserve better than living in fear and secrecy.”
For a long time, Nyla sat without saying a word, her arms wrapped around her knees, while she stared at Shelby. Finally, she leaned forward and put her elbows on her knees. Now their heads were just inches apart. They looked into each other’s eyes. “What about you? You deserve better too.”
Shelby lowered her head. “Of course I’d wish for a better life, but I don’t have a choice. You do.”
“Do I?” Nyla murmured as if she were talking to herself. “I don’t have any more of a choice than my grandmother did.”
“Your grandmother?” Shelby furrowed her brow. What did Nyla’s grandmother have to do with anything? Her heartbeat sped up. Had Nyla told her grandmother what Shelby was?
“My grandmother married my grandfather after knowing him for just three days. She always said she didn’t have a choice.”
“A forced marriage?” Shelby wrinkled her nose. Humans had strange traditions.
Nyla smiled for the first time since she’d arrived at Shelby’s. “No. She fell head over heels in love with my grandfather. Five minutes after meeting him, she couldn’t imagine sharing her life with anyone else.”
Carefully, Shelby shuffled closer. Her nose was almost touching Nyla’s. Shelby shivered as Nyla’s warm breath washed over her face. She stared into Nyla’s dark eyes. “You mean ...” She didn’t dare voice it.
“I’m scared and confused, and common sense tells me to run away as fast as I can. But,” Nyla shrugged and a tiny dimple formed on her left cheek, “I can’t pass up a tasty morsel like you—even if you’re a very strange tasty morsel.”
A pack of wild horses couldn’t have held Shelby back any longer. She eagerly wrapped her arms around Nyla.
Nyla, who had been perched on the edge of the armchair, slipped.
Before Shelby could stop their fall, they tumbled to the floor with Nyla on top. Shelby still had protective arms wrapped around Nyla. She barely felt the cold, hard floor. The only thing she felt was Nyla—her body, her scent, her warmth. “Nyla,” she whispered against the soft lips. She stared into dark eyes and admired Nyla’s long lashes, the elegant nose, and the tiny wrinkles at the corners of her mouth. Her nostrils quivered as she sucked in Nyla’s breath. The scent of wilted jasmine was gone. Now Nyla smelled of fresh blooms, mixed with the tangy scent of a coyote romping through dewy grass. She rubbed her nose over Nyla’s neck.
After a few seconds, Nyla sank against her. Every muscle in her body softened. Not even a sheet of paper could have fit between them now. “Is this a Wrasa tradition?” Nyla asked, her voice husky.
“Hmm?” Nyla’s nearness made thinking nearly impossible. Shelby lifted her head. “Um ... what do you mean?”
“Making love on the living room floor.”
Making love? Shelby swallowed. Heat rushed through her. Did Nyla mean …? “Oh, um ... no. Of course not.” She rolle
d around until she positioned herself over Nyla. Shifting her weight onto hands and knees, she looked down at Nyla. “You mean ...?”
“Everything feels so ... surreal since Saturday night,” Nyla said in a low voice. “I need something that lets me know that our love ... the connection I feel between us is not an illusion.”
“It’s real,” Shelby whispered. She lifted Nyla’s hand and pressed it against her pounding heart. “I’m really sorry I ...”
Nyla covered Shelby’s mouth with her soft fingers. “Not now. We’ll talk later. I’ve done nothing but think for the past five days, and if I keep doing that, my head will explode. For the moment, I don’t want to think. I only want to feel.”
Shelby looked into her eyes. The problems between them weren’t completely resolved, but the love she saw in Nyla’s eyes made her believe the two of them had a chance. That made her happier than going through a successful transformation. She leaned down and kissed Nyla, at first careful and slow, but then, when Nyla kissed her back, with more passion. “We Wrasa do have a tradition,” she murmured between kisses.
“Hmm?” Nyla nibbled on Shelby’s lower lip until every cell in Shelby’s body seemed to burn.
Breathing heavily, she looked down at Nyla. “If we make love, it lasts for three days and three nights. You better take tomorrow off.” She kissed Nyla. “And the day after tomorrow.” Another kiss. “And the day after that.”
Nyla pulled back to stare at her. “Are you serious?”
Shelby laughed. “No.” She laughed again at the mix of relief and disappointment on Nyla’s face. “But we can start our own tradition.” She stood on shaky legs and offered her hand to help Nyla up.
Nyla took her hand without hesitation. “Okay. I’ll call the head nurse.”
Shelby led her to the bedroom and, once there, pulled her close and started nibbling on her neck. “Later. Much later.”
Chapter 6
“Are you nervous?” Nyla asked as they left the trail and headed deeper into the forest.