by Jenika Snow
“You’re not going anywhere, baby.” He kissed the top of her head, and the act seemed far more intimate than what they had just done. “That was.... Holy fuck, I don’t even know how to explain it. I have never felt anything like that in my life.” The way he said the words seemed to mean something much deeper, but she didn’t question him or contemplate it.
She would enjoy what time she had with him, because she too had never felt anything like what they just shared.
It wasn’t just about two people having sex. Her animal had risen to the surface for the first time since she started having sex, and she had felt his bear right there as well. The touch of his claws on her skin, so close to breaking the surface of her flesh, had felt like a cataclysm of sensations.
The scent of the predator that Ford was had been primal and carnal, feral and savage. He tightened his hold on her, and even though they had just gotten done having mind-blowing sex, he was still semi-hard.
Being embraced by him had Talia feeling safe, protected, and had her drifting off in the warm, powerful embrace of this bear.
9
Ford lifted a piece of lumber over his shoulder and carried it over to the two-story home Wylde Construction was currently building. The development consisted of twenty-four houses in a three-block radius, and they had three homes left to finish.
It was hot, nearing ninety degrees, and all he could think about was Talia.
It had been three days since he dropped her off at some boutique in town, per her request, and he couldn’t get the little red fox out of his head. The night he spent with her had been raw and like nothing he had ever felt.
The darkness that had been so much a part of him for the last ten years had vanished the moment he touched her, kissed her, and buried himself deep inside her.
He couldn’t just have one night with her, not when she made him feel alive and wanting more out of life. He wanted her and only her, and that revelation was a blow to the carefully erected wall he had built around himself. How had he fallen so hard for someone in just a short amount of time?
His reaction to what was only supposed to be a one-night stand was not like him at all. Working constantly until he was exhausted hadn’t helped either. Although he wanted her, he was also scared shitless of what he was feeling. His bear was constantly on the prowl inside him, growling and wanting to emerge and hunt her down like a predator finding its prey.
Why he had this infatuation with a female who would be leaving Sweet Water was beyond him, and why did it hurt so damn bad at the thought of her going away? He thought back to his big brother Charlie and wondered if this was how he felt when he found Ary.
He hadn’t spoken to his brothers about this, but maybe he should. Maybe then he could make sense of why he felt so unbalanced. He thought fucking her that one time would ease this pressure inside him, but it turned out it made him just want her that much more.
He was a fiend when it came to Talia, and she was the only drug that could quench his insatiable addiction.
He set the lumber against the side of the building and went back for more. Sometimes, he stayed behind the scenes and worked with the architects on the blueprints, but the majority of the time, he did manual labor, trying to wear his body and mind out so much he just passed out.
But in just the three days since he met Talia, he needed more than just manual labor to help ease the frantic feeling inside him.
No amount of working tired him. In fact, he seemed even more wound up after a hard day’s work. It was as if he couldn’t control his bear, like the fucker wanted out to do whatever the hell it wanted to.
“Hey, you okay, Ford?” Bram jogged up next to him. They both picked up a load of lumber and made their way back to the frame.
“Yeah, I’m good.” He could sense Bram’s stare but didn’t bother looking over at his youngest brother. After setting the wood down next to the first load and wiping the sweat from his face, he finally looked at Bram. His brother sported a nasty-looking black eye and a busted lip. “I should be asking you if you’re okay.”
Bram grimaced but waved off Ford’s question.
“Nah, I’m good. Aside from the fact that I got drunk and then decided to fight.”
Ford lifted his eyebrow and stared at Bram. “Is this one of those underground ones or just a random bar brawl?”
“Random drunken fight at Slater’s, but what the fuck ever. The guy was asking for a beat-down anyway when he thought he had bigger balls than me and decided to call me a pussy in front of his girl.”
They headed back over for another round of lumber. It was no secret that Bram fought... a lot. The youngest Wylde bear had a nasty temper, but it was more because his bear controlled him more than his human side. The underground shifter fights weren’t a secret in Sweet Water, but no one, the law included, fucked with them.
Besides, Ford hated to think how his brother would be faring if he didn’t fight and let off all those fucking animalistic tendencies he carried around inside himself.
It wasn’t uncommon for shifters to get into underground cage fighting. Letting their inner animals out to do some temporary destruction helped to ease the built-up adrenalin, testosterone, and overall wildness that resided in all male shifters.
Blood was shed, bones were broken, and fur flew. It was a spectacle that got all the males in the surrounding area rowdy for the bloody sport.
“You want to get drunk tonight, maybe pick up some chicks?” Bram wiped his brow and shielded his eyes with his forearm from the sun. “I need to get laid, that or I need to find a fight, and as you can see—” He pointed to his face. “—the last time I got drunk and in a fight, it sucked big balls. I’d rather fuck.”
“I don’t think you need to fuck either with your face looking beat to hell.”
Bram scoffed. “You should see the motherfucker who started it all. I bet his ass don’t come around me ever again.” Bram cracked him knuckles and rolled his neck on his shoulders. “In fact, just talking about that shit is getting me pissed all over again.” Ford could sense Bram’s bear rising up and knew a change of subject needed to be introduced or his little brother would end up destroying something.
“So yeah, you up for going out with me or what?” Bram ran his hand over his sweat-soaked hair, clearly waiting for Ford to answer. Banging some random chick had his dick shriveling up. All he could think about was the image of Talia’s voluptuous body, of her big breasts shaking from the force of fucking her, and of her lips parted and her breathy moans spilling out.
He had never had a female who left such a lasting impression on him, and never had he wanted a second chance with them.
She was an oddity to him, but something he wanted to explore more deeply. This little redhead changed everything in the course of a few hours. Fuck, this wasn’t good, and he needed to cleanse her from his mind, because obsessing about her like this was bordering on fucked-up.
“I don’t want a random fuck, but I could use a stiff drink.”
Fortunately, Bram didn’t question him on his lack of female company, and instead slapped him on the back in approval.
Maybe getting drunk would do him some good, but the more he thought about it, the more a good fight sounded like an ideal energy reliever.
10
Dylan circled Ford, his muscles bulging as they prepared to shift.
After they had gotten off work, they headed over to Slater’s, the small hole-in-the-wall bar that held the underground shifter cage fighting in their basement.
Now, here was Ford, standing in the dank basement with a dripping pipe running above him, the scent of mildew filling the musty, damp air, and the muted noise of the music above them.
Ford pulled his T-shirt over his head and tossed it to Bram, who stood on the sidelines waiting his turn to throw some punches. Dylan, the lion shifter, cracked his neck and then his knuckles. He grinned at Ford.
There was enough alcohol moving through his veins that even if the lion shifter got a hit on him, he woul
d be too numb to feel it.
He had drowned himself in liquor once again, hoping to rid himself of these feelings for Talia, because frankly, they were almost too much for his shattered mind and heart to take in. Of course, all of that alcohol only managed to make him want her even more.
“I’m gonna fuck you up, bear.” Dylan ripped his shirt off, took his jeans off, and took a step toward Ford.
Ford was ready for this. He had Talia on his mind, and that was what needed to change, because he needed to get rid of all this fucking energy she caused within him.
He let the shift take over, felt his bear move through his body until his muscles stretched, his bones broke and realigned, and his bear pushed his human to the side.
He stood to his full ten-foot height and stared down at the now shifted Dylan. The lion paced back and forth, and even though Ford was now in full bear mode, he still felt the effects of the alcohol rolling through his system. He knew he could easily take a lion, no doubt about it, but he wanted to feel pain.
Ford needed his mind off other things, ones that had him wanting to keep a certain foxy female by his side. Those were ideas he certainly didn’t want to play with, and so the best way to deal with it was fight like there was no tomorrow.
They charged forward and met in the center. Teeth tore into flesh, claws ripped into muscles, and blood sprayed out like a geyser coating the dull gray cement floor a brilliant red. Dylan dug his claws into Ford’s belly, and he let out a roar of pain and relief. Ford had fought on a few different occasions over the last ten years, needing that pain to numb his mind.
He couldn’t explain this feeling inside him, but it was as if he was coming unhinged and about to combust.
And it was all because of this one female. It didn’t make any sense, and all he could think about was Charlie and his now pregnant mate.
His brother had been so unstable when he met Ary, and Ford had a suspicion he might be going through the same situation as his older brother. Could it be that his bear recognized Talia as his mate?
Dylan bit his shoulder, and Ford swiped his paw out, throwing the lion to his side. He might have wanted to feel pain, but his thoughts were making him vulnerable and look like a pussy who couldn’t handle himself against a lion. Tilting his head back and roaring, he charged Dylan.
The crowd that surrounded them was loud and rowdy, calling out for more violence, wanting to see them tear each other apart. It was exhilarating and painful, and to Ford’s disappointment didn’t lessen his thoughts when they concerned Talia. He let his confusion, anger, arousal, and every other emotion he felt for Talia wash through him and defeat the lion.
When it was all said and done and Dylan limped off to lick his wounds, Ford looked around, needing another contender. Bram stepped up, placed his hand on Ford, which only had his bear rounding on his youngest brother and growling. Bram held up both hands. Ford forced his bear into submission.
He was being uncontrollable and needed to calm the fuck down. He took a deep breath and changed back into his human form. It was the same bone-snapping, muscle-tearing sensation.
Bram handed Ford his shirt and pants, and he quickly put them on, covering his now bloody and torn flesh. “Fuck, man, you were intense out there.”
The crowd was still going wild as a tiger and panther shifter took the center stage. Ford was done for right now, ready to pass out and get his bearings. He wanted to talk to Charlie, see if what he was feeling was his confirmation on Talia being his mate, even though he was pretty damn sure that was what in the hell was going on.
Running a hand through his hair, which was wet with sweat and blood, he let out a heavy sigh. Yeah, he was pretty fucking sure he had just found his mate, and even if there was a part of him that feared what came with that, he knew his bear wouldn’t let her go.
Hell, his human wouldn’t let her go either, but the thought of claiming another female was like him stepping off the end of the world and hoping his feet would touch land.
He never thought he would find his mate. The question he had for himself was: was he going to fight his bear and let the darkness that had been so much a part of himself for so long take him deeper to despair, or give in and let himself experience love again?
Fuck, that was the million-dollar question.
11
Passing out was not on the list of what he wanted to do. He needed some advice, and his older brother was the smartest male he knew. Charlie would help him sort this shit out, even if Ford had never been completely honest with what had gone down with Mina.
They left Slater’s, and he made a call to Charlie.
After talking to him briefly, they headed over to their older brother’s cabin. Ford needed a shower and sleep, but he was more worried about getting the confusion out of his head.
Now, an hour later, they sat around Charlie’s dining room table, a bottle of whiskey sitting in the center of the table and shot glasses in front of them.
Ford and Bram sure as hell didn’t need any more alcohol, but what the fuck, maybe some liquid courage would make him confess this easier. Charlie and Bram stared at him, both with a little bit of anticipation on their faces of what he would say.
It was late as fuck, and Ary was sleeping upstairs. Ford felt guilty for coming to Charlie’s at this hour, but he needed his brother’s interpretation on what the hell was going on. So that was what he did, just spilled everything.
The reason he and Mina broke up, the darkness that consumed him for so fucking long, and then everything he felt when he met Talia.
For ten years, he’d kept that shit with Mina buried deep inside, but then this little red fox had come around and all hell had broken loose inside him. After all of that, his brothers just sat there staring at him with mixed emotions.
“Everything feels so fucked up inside me.” Ford took a sip of his whiskey, not really wanting to throw that shit back to further numb what he felt. He waited not so patiently to hear what his brothers had to say, specifically Charlie, since he knew his older brother had felt this edginess inside him as well.
Bram and Charlie stared at him, and although Bram looked somewhat shocked, Charlie appeared thoughtful.
“Shit, man, I didn’t know the Mina situation had gone down like that.” Bram scrubbed a hand over his jaw. “You should have told us. We would have helped you through it.”
Ford knew this, but he had been a coward and kept everything inside and to himself.
He looked at Charlie. “I’m really sorry about Mina and the fucked-up shit she did, Ford.” Charlie looked thoughtful and concerned. “Bram’s right; you should have told us. We would have helped you get through it and made sure that ugly darkness didn’t consume you. Shit, I feel like an accessory to all the crap that happened with you. Before I met Ary, I pushed you guys to be wild, not settle down, and live life how you wanted and without looking back, but that shit backfired.” Charlie looked at Ford and then at Bram. Ford knew his older brother was addressing Bram’s need to fight constantly.
“I can say that I felt like you, to a point, when I found Ary. You and your bear have found your mate.” Charlie’s grim look turned into one of brotherly love. “Don’t run from it, but embrace the feelings going through you. You have found your mate, Ford, and that is one of the greatest gifts of all.”
Ford was no good for a female, for a mate. He had done a whole lot of shitty stuff in his life, things he wasn’t proud of, and things he just wanted to forget.
“Well, shit.” Bram ran a hand through his hair and looked between them. “Looks like I’ll be the lone man out.” He leaned back and linked his hands behind his head. “That’s all right with me, ‘cause I’m not looking to settle down anyway. I kind of like having a choice on who I fuck.”
Leave it to Bram to try to put a little humor into their tense, serious conversation. Charlie snorted and poured them another round of shots.
“All I can say, Ford, is don’t fight it. Get rid of that hatred you have buried deep i
nside. Let your bear roam free and experience it with you, and just be glad you found your female. There are a whole lot of shifters who spend their lives trying to find what you stumbled upon. I tried fighting it with Ary, and it didn’t help. In fact, it made me want her all the more. I felt unstable and on edge. All I wanted to do was claim her, and there was a point when I worried I would be too rough with her and that my bear would take over too aggressively.” Ford took in his brother’s words. “Now, I look back, and I can’t see my life without her, and I am damn glad she wants me. The baby will be here in a few months, and all I keep thinking about is I’m one lucky bastard to have her accept me.”
They threw back their shots, and Ford leaned back. He knew deep down he couldn’t and wouldn’t fight the need to be with Talia, but there was that uncertainty he always carried, and he hated that ten years later he was still holding onto these unnecessary emotions.
“You need to forget about Mina and how she ruined you, and focus on the future, Ford.”
He looked at Bram.
“I can’t wait until you find your mate, Bram. Man, I’m going to give you such a hard time ‘cause I already know you’ll be crawling on your hands and knees to please her.” Charlie’s words had Ford laughing, even though he wasn’t feeling very amused at the moment. He thought about Talia and everything Charlie said.
“Charlie?” The sound of a very tired Ary pierced the air. Charlie was out of his seat and by Ary as she came walking into the kitchen. She wore a T-shirt and a pair of pajama bottoms. The swell of her belly was evident, and Ford found himself smiling at the prospect of being an uncle. It still stunned him that Charlie was going to be a father.
He’d never thought his eldest brother would settle down, but when it came to Ary, he was protective and extremely territorial. Ford could see Charlie’s bear rise to the surface every time his mate was near, and Ford knew he was the same way with Talia.