Thirteen
Bailey and I had barely moved a muscle since we’d gotten home from school. She asked me for all the juicy details of the day, and while I didn’t have anything ‘juicy’ to share, I still told her everything. It’d been the first time in years that we had a conversation that lasted so long without exploding into an argument of some kind. I noticed how smoothly things were going after about ten minutes, but I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to jinx it.
So we sat there on my bed talking, laughing, and musing about life. Bailey spent a while painting a vivid picture of what her life would’ve been like had we never left LA, and I (silently and every bit to myself) painted a lovely picture of what life could be like if we never had to leave Sugar Creek. I wouldn’t have to quit my job, change schools before graduation, or say goodbye to Gabe. I could go to DU, and I could live out my dream. But most importantly, I wouldn’t have to face Mom again.
“Oh good, you’re both here,” Dad said, poking his head into my room that evening.
“What do you want?” Bailey asked, turning to look at him. Needless to say, she’d been just as eager to spend time with our father lately as I’d been.
“I think it goes without saying that we need to have ourselves a conversation,” he said, stopping at the door. It must’ve been his fear of being yelled out or ganged up on that caused him to hesitate, because he didn’t take another step closer. “Do you have a minute?”
“It depends what that minute entails,” Bailey spat back.
Dad finally mustered the nerve to come in. After a few hesitant steps, he made his way to the bed and sat down on the mattress next to my sister. I pulled my legs up close to my chest, careful not to let him touch me. I barely wanted him speaking to me, so physical contact was completely out of the question.
“We need to talk about California.”
“I told you I’m not going,” Bailey said, but she didn’t waste a moment to tack the word ‘yet’ to the end of her sentence. “It’s not fair for you to ask us to leave at the beginning of our senior year, Dad. We still have homecoming, prom, graduation, and Mandy has the RI program. You can’t rip us away from all of that just to take a job.”
“And what about Jones?” I added, eliciting a stare from both Dad and Bailey.
“What about him?” they both asked at the same time, and I sat a little straighter.
“It’s not fair for you to ask Bailey to end her relationship just for a stupid TV role,” I said, and that only made them stare harder. “She really likes Jones, and he really, really, really likes her. No, they haven’t been together long, but what if this relationship is just at the beginning of something that has potential to go long-term? What if you’re just asking too much of her? What if he’s the one she’s supposed to marry? He could be her soul mate, and do you really want to be the one responsible for tearing her away from her soul mate?”
“Since when do you believe in soul mates?” Bailey muttered under her breath, and then her eyes widened as I looked down at my folded hands. “Oh…”
“I just don’t think it’s fair for you to rip us away from all of the things we have going on right now,” I mumbled.
“And that’s what I came in here to talk to you girls about,” Dad said, perking up. “I know you guys can’t see it now, and all you’re seeing is the negative side to moving again, but there’s so much silver-lining to this move, I swear.”
“Other than the fact that you’ll be back on TV,” I said, finally looking at him, “Give me one reason to believe there’s anything positive that could come from this move.”
Dad remained quiet for a few long seconds.
“You know being back in LA will put us right back where we swore we’d never be again,” I said. “You’re being selfish to ask us to go back there.”
“And you’re being selfish by asking me to stay here,” he retorted. “What am I supposed to do? Give up everything I’ve ever worked for? I’d never expect you to give up something you loved. Never.”
“You’re doing that now!” I yelled, and Bailey’s hand landed gently on my wrist. I looked down at her fingers as they squeezed my arm, and a warm sensation tingled on my skin. She was holding me, protecting me, doing everything she could to silently assure me that she wasn’t going to let anything bad happen. I couldn’t remember the last time Bailey had done something that promising, but for a faint minute it felt as though my sister had become my friend again.
“Dad,” Bailey said, looking to him, “have you taken the job?”
“Nothing’s official,” he said. “I told them I needed time to talk to you girls.”
“Perfect. Then let’s be realistic here, okay?” Bailey injected about as much enthusiasm into her voice as she could, but it wasn’t much. “Nothing is set in stone. Dad and I both want to go to California, but I’m not ready yet, and neither is Mandy,” she said, looking up at our father. “So why can’t we just do the simple thing and wait?”
“Meaning?”
“If the guys in LA want you now, they’ll still want you in the long run. That gives us some time to wrap things up here,” Bailey said. “Let’s start in small increments. Six weeks. That’s plenty of time to think, to plan, and to get our thoughts in order. While we’re here, we’ll get to go to homecoming, prepare ourselves for what’s ahead, and really have some time to think this over. Mandy can wrap up her stint with RI and win that scholarship, and then we’ll reconvene and talk about how to move forward from there. Maybe with that amount of time, we’ll all have a clearer idea of what we all want.”
“I’m not going to change my mind,” Dad and I said at precisely the same time, and we watched each other for a long minute, neither of us eager to be the first to break eye contact.
“Six weeks, guys,” Bailey said. “Can we at least agree on that for now?”
Dad’s eyes flittered to the side as he looked out the window, avoiding both of our stares. He didn’t want to wait; he wanted to jump the gun, throwing caution to the wind, regardless of whatever his daughters wanted. But Dad wasn’t heartless, and despite his recent behavior, he wasn’t completely void of emotion. If it meant keeping both of his children from hating him, he’d do it. He just wouldn’t be happy about it, and I knew we’d pay for it in the long run. Dad was bitter, and he held grudges. That’s why we’d ended up in Sugar Creek in the first place.
“Six weeks,” he said. “End of story.”
Bailey and I looked at one another, knowing that a postponement of his plans was the closest thing to a compromise that we’d ever get from him. And that was okay with me. It gave me plenty of time to put a different plan in order, because I wasn’t getting back on a plane to California.
Earlier, sitting on campus with Gabe, I was too quick to give up, to let Dad have his way and accept that things weren’t going to change for the better. But Gabe was right. I had to keep fighting for what I wanted. So it was time to stand up. I’d fight, because I was staying right where I belonged, whether either of them chose to stay or not. I didn’t know how I’d do it, or where I’d even begin to find the resources to make it on my own if I had to, but I’d do it.
There were just some rules that I knew I could never, ever, ever break. Not for anyone. Not even Gabe, and especially not for my Dad. Rule #7: Always look out for number one.
Breaking Rules Page 16