From the force of her unexpected push, Steven lost his balance and fell onto the couch behind him, where he erupted into a fit of giggles.
“How could I what?” he mumbled in a squeaky voice, seeming to assume Tammy was playing some sort of game.
Tammy took a step back as Steven struggled to his feet in front of her. “You’ve stolen the money I had stashed away. That was for our fucking rent, Steven!” she screamed, feeling her anger intensify. “I hate you!” She raised her hand and slapped him hard across his cheek. Her hand stung, but it felt good to blast her rage at him.
Steven’s head whipped around, causing him to fall back onto the couch. Rubbing the red mark that was now forming on his face, he hollered back, “Fuck! I’m sorry, okay. I was sick. I just happened to stumble across the envelope and temptation got the better of me.”
“You didn’t stumble on that money. You hunted high and low for it until you found it. I’m sick of your fucking lies!” Tammy hollered before kicking the sole of her foot into his shin.
Steven winced and leaned forward to rub his leg. “Goddammit! Quit hitting me, okay. I said I was sorry. Let’s talk about this in the morning. I’ll get the money back.”
Tammy let out a sarcastic laugh. “You’ll get the money back, will you? You’re a fucking loser, Steven. I used to feel sorry for you, but now, I totally despise you and I just can’t wait till I’m free of you.”
In an instant, Steven was alert. Taking Tammy by surprise, he grabbed her arm and pulled her down within inches of his face while squeezing her arm tight and digging his nails into her skin. Tammy shuddered with fear as her body tensed up from the pain. With a piercing stare, he growled, “If you ever try to leave me and take my son away from me, Tammy, believe me, I will find you. I will hunt you down and you’ll wish you never had.” He tightened his grip around her arm. “Do you understand me?”
Tammy winched from the pain. “Yes,” she whimpered, uncertain of what he might do if she tried to argue.
Steven released his grip, leaned back against the couch and smirked. “Good. Do we understand each other now?”
Tammy rubbed her arm to ease the throbbing pain spreading over her skin. “Yes, we do.”
Wanting only the comfort of her son, she ran down the hallway with tears swelling in her eyes. Closing the door behind her, she let the tears fall. Through her watery eyes, she looked down at Matt innocently sleeping in his crib. She was relieved to find their shouting hadn’t woken him.
Seeing the rage in Steven’s eyes when he threatened her had made her realize he was more than capable of harming her. But would he hurt his own son?
Chapter 40
The next morning, Tammy was woken by the sound of Steven’s stern voice while he shook her arm. “Come on, get up. We’re going to my mother’s house.”
“What?” she asked, still in a sleepy state.
“You heard me. We’re going to my mother’s.” He ripped the covers away from her body. “So, get up and just grab what we need.”
“I can’t just leave! What about my job?”
“You’ll get another.”
“But your mother lives in Los Angeles!” She heard Matt stirring in the crib and got up from the bed. “Out of my way. Matt’s waking up,” Tammy said while gesturing with her hands for Steven to move aside. She picked up Matt and rocked him in her arms. “So, we’re going to run away again? Leave everything behind again? That’s your plan?” she asked, her voice laced with sarcasm.
“Well, do you have a better one? My mother will put us up for a while, and besides, it’s about time she met her grandson, don’t you think?”
After last night, she didn’t want to piss him off—especially in front of Matt. “Fine, I’ll start packing after I’ve fed Matt.”
“Good. I’m going out for a while. I’ll be back in a couple hours. I want you and Matt ready to leave when I get back.”
Knowing he’d probably left to score drugs with the rent money he’d stolen, it crossed Tammy’s mind to leave with Matt while he was gone. But he had taken her car, and she feared the consequences of being found if she tried to escape. For now, she’d have to go along with his plan. She would know when the time was right to leave.
While sitting in the rocking chair feeding Matt, Tammy made the difficult phone call to Connie. After two rings, a female voice answered the restaurant’s phone. Tammy recognized it as the hostess, Stacey. “Connie’s Diner. How may I help you?”
“Hi, Stacey, it’s Tammy. Is Connie available?”
“Hey, Tammy. One second, let me transfer you to the bar.”
“Thanks.”
Tammy listened to a moment of soothing classical music while her call was transferred. “Hello, Connie speaking.”
“Hey, Connie, it’s Tammy.”
“Hi, Tammy. How’s my little man?”
“He’s fine. Listen, I hate to tell you this with such short notice…” She hesitated and took a deep breath. “I won’t be able to work for you anymore. I feel awful about it, Connie, and I’m so sorry. You’ve been so good to me.”
“Is everything okay?” Connie asked, concerned.
Tammy lied. “Yes, everything’s fine. Steven’s mother is sick, so we’re going to move in with her for a while so he can take care of her. She lives in Los Angeles.”
Connie wasn’t buying her story but didn’t want to intervene. “I’m so sorry. I’m going to miss you, but I’m going to miss little Matt even more.”
“I know, I’m going to miss you too, Connie. Is it okay if I come in later today and pick up my final check?”
“Sure, I’ll have it ready for you. And, Tammy?”
“Yes?”
“If you ever need anything, I’m here.”
Tammy read between the lines perfectly well and knew she was reaching out, but she couldn’t possibly involve her in her twisted world. “Thanks, I will.” She sighed and hung up the phone.
Tammy knew she should probably call her dad and Joanne with the disturbing news that she was moving yet again. But, not knowing the address of Steven’s mother, she decided against it. She didn’t have any answers to the concerning questions they’d probably have. Once she was settled, she’d call them with the same excuse she gave Connie.
Once Matt had fallen asleep, she placed him in his crib and began to pack.
Chapter 41
Two days later, Tammy and Steven pulled into an apartment complex in San Gabriel, a suburb of Los Angeles.
“Wow, I haven’t been here in over five years but it still looks the same,” Steven said as he parked the car and opened his door.
Tammy stepped out, opened the back door, and lifted Matt out of his car seat. “Can you grab the diaper bag from the trunk? I need to change him,” Tammy asked, her voice flat.
Once they had what they needed, Tammy followed Steven through a narrow passageway toward the apartments. Straight away, Tammy noticed the white metal bars on all the windows. “What’s with all the bars? It’s like living in a jail.”
“It’s to stop people from breaking in,” Steven answered.
“Can’t be a very good neighborhood if you have to bar up your windows.”
“It’s fine, Tammy. My mom’s lived here for over fifteen years and has never had a problem. Why do you always have to find fault with everything?”
“I’m not finding fault. I was merely observing. It’s the first place I’ve ever seen with bars on the windows. That’s all.”
He shook his head. “Whatever.”
Steven approached apartment number 102 on the first floor and banged on the metal screen door, causing it to shake and make a rattling noise.
“Steven! Not so loud,” Tammy hissed.
“She’s hard of hearing. It’s you that needs to be quiet. Jeez.”
Tammy stood behind him holding Matt, nervously anticipating meeting his mother for the first time. A few moments later, the door behind the screen opened and a frail old lady, using a cane to steady herself, peered through the mesh.<
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“Hi, Ma, it’s Steven!” he yelled.
The old lady looked confused. “Steven?”
“Yes, it’s me. Open the door.”
His mother fiddled with a few locks and latches on the inside of the door and finally managed to unlock it. Both Tammy and Steven took a step back as she pushed it open toward them. Tammy was astonished by her age; she had to be at least seventy. Then, Tammy remembered Steven telling her she’d had him when she was forty-five.
“Ma!” Steven bellowed, pulling Tammy in closer to him, causing Tammy to cringe. “This is my girlfriend Tammy, and this is your grandson Matt.”
Unable to hide her look of shock caused by their unannounced visit, Steven’s mother clasped her bony frail hands in front of her face. Tammy noticed the prominent purple veins criss-crossing her skin like a web. “Oh my goodness! Hi, Tammy, I’m Elizabeth. Come in.”
“Hi,” Tammy said softly with a kind smile.
Following Steven inside, Tammy saw it was a simple two-bedroom apartment, darkened by the closed drapes. Every available surface was cluttered with dusty knick-knacks and photos, and gaudy, gold-framed pictures of flowers and fruit bowls hung from almost every inch of the walls.
Tammy settled herself on the burgundy couch with Matt and watched with pity as Elizabeth struggled to sit next to her. Every movement seemed to cause her discomfort and pain. Tammy turned to Steven, who seemed oblivious to his mother’s troubles, and whispered with disbelieving sarcasm. “Will you help her? I can’t believe I have to ask you to help your own mother.”
Dumbfounded by her request and feeling awkward at the idea of having to help his ailing mother, he complied reluctantly and steadied her with a hand on her arm as she slowly lowered herself onto the couch.
“Oh, he is so precious,” Elizabeth said, staring into her grandson’s eyes. “Why didn’t you call me and let me know you were coming? I would have fixed us something to eat.”
“We wanted to surprise you, Ma.” Steven paused. “In fact, we were thinking about staying for a few days.” He looked over at Tammy. “Right, Tammy?” he asked with a persistent tone.
Tammy looked away from his stare and turned to his mother. “Err, yes, if it’s okay with you, Elizabeth. We don’t want to impose on you.”
Before Elizabeth could answer, Steven had left the matching burgundy chair and was at his mother’s side. He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. “It’s no trouble. Is it, Ma? You want to spend time with your grandson, don’t you, Ma?” His leering smile made Tammy shift uncomfortably in her seat.
His mother reached up and patted her son’s hand. “Of course I do. You can stay here for as long as you want. You can have the spare bedroom. You may have to clean it up a bit, I’ve not been in there for quite some time.”
Tammy felt sorry for her. She seemed so frail and lost. Steven didn’t seem at all concerned about his mother’s failing health, only with what she could give him. Shelter, food, and—most importantly, Tammy assumed—money. “Don’t you worry about it, Elizabeth. I’ll be happy to clean the room,” Tammy said.
“Are you sure?” Steven’s mother asked.
“Yes, I’m sure. It’s the least I can do.” Tammy gave her a friendly smile. “And thank you.”
Within less than twenty-four hours, Tammy witnessed Steven coaxing money from his elderly mother. Whatever stories he told her were probably lies but, from that day forward, his mother gave him cash every morning. With money in his hand and a smirk on his face, he left, not to be seen until after dark. Insisting the car be left with her because of Matt, Tammy would stare from the kitchen window, which looked out onto the main street, and watch Steven jump into a black beat-up sedan before speeding off down the street.
His mother was oblivious to his drug use. He was an only child, and in the eyes of a mother, her son could do no wrong. Tammy was afraid to tell her, knowing it would break her heart.
Left alone all day with Matt, Tammy soon became friends with Elizabeth’s neighbor, Natalie, who was a stay-at-home mom with two young boys aged two and three. They frequently spent the afternoons together in the courtyard, letting her two boys play while Matt got some sun and fresh air. Some days, Natalie watched Matt for a couple of hours while Tammy looked for work. After a week of searching, she found a job as a waitress at a local diner.
Thrilled for Tammy, Natalie relieved one of Tammy’s biggest concerns and offered to watch Matt while she was at work.
That night, while Elizabeth and Matt were sleeping, Tammy told Steven about her successful job hunt. As usual, he’d arrived home well after ten o’clock wearing the smirk she despised. After a quick “hi,” he grabbed a beer from the fridge, took a seat on the couch, stretched his legs out on the coffee table and fixed his eyes on the television.
Dressed in her bathrobe, Tammy sat in the chair across from him. “I thought you should know I got a job today. I start tomorrow.”
“Why?” he asked, not taking his eyes off the TV.
“Well, we can’t stay here forever. I don’t want your mum supporting us. Don’t you feel bad taking money from her every day?”
Steven laughed. “It’s not that much. Besides, she loves me.”
Tammy hated his cocky laugh. “Well, it bothers me. I want to contribute.”
Steven steered his eyes away from the television. “Who’s going to watch Matt? Surely not my mother?”
“No! I wouldn’t dream of asking her. I’ve become friends with Natalie next door. Not that you would know, being away all day. Anyway, she’s going to watch him.”
“Well, it looks like you got it all figured out. Does this mean you’ll get tips every day?”
Tammy could tell he was mulling something through in his head but wasn’t going to ask. Whatever it was, it wouldn’t be good. “Yes, and it will help with diapers and stuff for Matt.” Tammy shifted in her seat. “You know, it wouldn’t hurt for you to find a job. Matt is your son too, you know?”
Steven threw back his head and scrunched his eyes closed. “Oh, don’t start with me, Tammy. I’m working on something. It takes time.”
“You always have an excuse, don’t you, Steven?” She stood up and marched towards their bedroom. “I’m off to bed.” Just like she did every night, she went to bed alone feeling nothing but hate for the man in the other room.
* * *
Now that Tammy had money coming in, she desperately wanted to get Steven away from his mother before he drained her completely. Secretly, she opened a saving account, but struggled to put much away because of Steven’s constant demands. Knowing she’d have tips after being on the floor for a few hours, he’d made it a daily habit to show up at her work and force her to give him all the money she had. He’d regularly back her into a corner and pin her against the wall, leaving Tammy with no choice but to give him some cash. She couldn’t risk causing a scene that may result in her losing her job.
During her lunch break one day, she scoured the classifieds for apartments but found they were all well out of her price range. Feeling discouraged, even more so by the pouring rain, she finished her shift, grabbed a newspaper to shield her head, and made a dash for her car.
A few blocks away, Tammy was surprised to see one of her co-workers, Judy, standing at a bus stop with no umbrella or hat. She quickly veered her car off to the side of the road and pulled up alongside of her. Tammy leaned over toward the passenger side of the car and rolled down the window. “Judy,” she hollered. “You’re getting soaked. Do you want a ride?”
Judy approached the car and peered in through the open window, her nose and cheeks flushed from the cold raindrops trickling down her face. Her flat, lifeless hair framed her face in a mangled mess. “Oh, hi, Tammy. Sure, that would be great. Thanks,” Judy said with gratitude. “If you don’t mind. I don’t live too far from here.”
Tammy reached over and pushed the door open. “Sure, no problem. Hop in.”
Judy lowered herself into the dry, warm car, relieved to be out of the rain.
“Thanks,” she said again.
“My god, Judy, you’re drenched.” Tammy turned her head and searched the back seat. “I know I always keep a towel in here. I never know when I may need one, especially when my kid is riding with me.” She scanned some more and then spotted the corner of it peeking out from under a bag. “Oh, here it is.” With one hand, Tammy pulled it up between the two seats and handed it to Judy.
Judy smiled. “Thanks,” she said and began dabbing her face.
“Where do you live?” Tammy asked while pulling away from the curb.
“Oh, not too far. About three miles down this road, at the Clifford Motel.”
“You live in a motel?” Tammy questioned. “Isn’t that expensive?”
“Actually, no, it isn’t. I pay by the week. They never asked me for a deposit and the utilities are included.”
Tammy was intrigued. “What about cooking?”
“I have a little fridge, a microwave, and a hotplate. It’s amazing what you can do when you have limited space.”
“Would you mind if I come take a look at your place? I’ve been looking for an apartment, but everything in the newspapers is so damn expensive.”
“Sure. If you don’t mind the mess. I have two kids so it gets kinda cramped.”
Tammy couldn’t hide her look of surprise. “You have two kids? I had no idea.”
“Yeah, I don’t talk much about my personal life at work.”
Tammy understood. She, too, hadn’t shared the fact that the father of her child was a drug addict, or that she was supporting him while they lived with his elderly mother in her small apartment. She wondered what else there was to know about Judy. How did she end up living in a motel? And where was the father of her children?
Chapter 42
A few minutes later, Judy instructed Tammy to pull up in front of a pale blue two-story building with white trims, scattered palm trees, and lush green lawns.
“This is it,” Judy said as the car came to a halt.
Tammy was impressed. “It doesn’t look too bad,” she remarked as she got out of the car. Closely inspecting every inch of the building and grounds as she looked around, Tammy followed Judy up the pathway and through a tall metal gate.
Reckless Beginnings Page 22