by Ciara Knight
“Stay and make this work, Ash. I sent you away last time. This time I want to make sure that you know I want you to stay.” Mom closed her fingers around mine. “Tell me you’ll think about it at least.”
I nodded, unable to say another word. Instead, I threw my arms around her and hugged her to me. “I thought you didn’t believe in me.”
“I’ve always believed in you. I thought you didn’t want me to be in your life because I wasn’t good enough. And more than anything I wanted you to leave if that’s what you wanted, only I couldn’t face it when it happened. It broke my heart when you left.”
“I never knew, Mom.” We held each other and cried. When we finally let go, I caught a glimpse of Brent swiping tears from his eyes.
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “So much for your strong jock image.”
“Don’t tell my father.” He teased.
I stood and slid my arms around him. I didn’t care if Mom saw, if Christmas Mountain saw, if the world saw. He hugged me back and for a minute I began to think about how to find my way back to Christmas Mountain permanently. The place I swore I never wanted to return to. But was I willing to give up everything I’ve worked for, my business, my life, to move back to the town I swore I’d left forever?
“Okay, let’s go iron out the details. You want to join us at the knitting store?”
Mom shook her head. “Afraid I have to work.”
“I hope someday I can afford to let you quit. You always sacrificed for us.”
“I never thought you noticed.” Mom’s voice cracked.
“I didn’t because I was a teenager, but I’m starting to see it now.”
Without another word, Mom disappeared out the front door. Brent stroked my hair and looked down at me. “It sounds like we need to figure a few things out.”
Thirteen
Friday afternoon I stood sentry at the window of the knitting store. If I admitted it to myself, I missed Brent. I thought he would’ve called when he was on the road, but he didn’t.
“She’s got it bad, don’t she?” Mrs. Cross announced to the knitting club.
Mrs. Blakely lowered her glass from her lips. “Leave her alone before you scare her off again.”
Yep, the entire town knew my business. They always had and always would, but I didn’t care. I had nothing to hide and if I was right, neither did Brent.
“Don’t you want to join us, dear?” Mrs. Blakely asked
“No thanks.” I eyed the women all sitting around sipping their wine and acting like they were knitting. “Did Ms. King ever come to wine…I mean knit club?”
“Oh, yes, but she wasn’t a drinker. She would bring her bottle for the wine tasting, but she actually came to knit.” Mrs. Claver said with a roll of her eyes. Clearly knitting wasn’t everyone’s goals.
I turned to see them all looking at me expectantly. “I know about her illness.”
All their faces relaxed, and they resumed their knitting and drinking. By the time club was over, I watched seven women hobble out the door swearing like sailors and carrying on like teenagers. I locked the doors to the shop, thankful to finally have a chance to go visit with Ms. King.
I left the warm and inviting knitting store and walked up Main street. It had been days since I saw Ms. King and I wanted to tell her that I took her advice and that Mom, and I were so much better. With a steady pace, I made it up the hill quick and veered left onto Church Street. One look at her home and the image of her illness flooded back to me. Before I could knock, she opened the door with her normal inviting smile. Her hair and makeup were done, so perhaps she felt better. “You look nice today.”
She waved me inside and shut the door wrapping her arms around herself to stave the chill. We sat in the parlor and I saw empty cups of tea. “Oh, you had company, that’s great.”
“Yes, Emma came to see me this morning. I’m afraid I fell asleep on the couch, so I didn’t get a chance to clean up.” She reached for the tray, but I grabbed it first.
“I’ll take care of that. You sit at the counter while I wash these off. I have a ton to share with you, but first, how was Emma?”
She followed me into the kitchen without arguing, which was uncharacteristic for her, so I knew she was tired. “But even before that, how did the tests go? I heard you went to Nashville.”
“Yes, all is going well. You should call Emma. She lives close and you two should chat while you’re here. I think that would be good for both of you.” She settled onto the bar stool.
I busied with washing the used tea cups and little tea pot with the roses on them. I knew she’d taken them out special for Emma the way she had for me. “I’ll do that. I’d like to speak with her about the Christmas extravaganza.”
“Sounds like you’ve agreed to stay.” Ms. King quirked an eyebrow at me. “What changed your mind?”
I placed the small, delicate tea cup upside down on the drying towel. “There were a few reasons. First, you. Ms. King, you were a mother to me when my mother and I couldn’t even be in the same room together.”
“I heard you two were doing well. I’m so happy.” And she was, you could see it in the way she tilted her head to one side and her gaze traveled upward as if to thank God.
I set the second tea cup down and then the pot before I dried my hands and settled on the stool next to her. “Me, too. I’m still not entirely clear on why we had such a rough time, but I know she let me go the morning I said I was leaving Christmas Mountain. It wasn’t because she wanted me to leave, but because she thought it was best for me. Apparently, she’d hoped I’d return sooner, but how was I supposed to know that?”
“You could have asked?”
Ms. King always stated things that were obvious to her, but we never saw until she pointed them out. It was a gift.
Ms. King didn’t look to the ceiling this time, she looked at the countertop.
“What is it?” I asked, nerves shifting and twisting in a what-are-you-keeping-from-me frenzy.
Ms. King answered with a reassuring smile. “I’m just thinking about how much time has gone by without the love of friends and family. I’m sad for you, but happy you’re working through things.”
“I am. Well, with Brent’s help. We went to my mother’s house and baked cookies for the Christmas Tree Decorating event in town.”
“I heard about that. You brought the town together for the first time in four years. I hear you and Brent, and your mom are working on a plan to revive our town and save the Christmas Mountain Community Center. It sounds like you’ll be staying awhile.”
“Yes, I think I will be. My partner wants to buy me out of our businesses, so I’m flying back in a couple of days to fight for my company, but I’ll come back as soon as I can. I haven’t had a real Christmas in eight years. Well, unless you count colored lights strung around palm trees and the boat deck Christmas?”
“And you didn’t have the people you cared about there, either.”
Yep, she had that gift alright. “Yes, of course.” I followed a crack in the countertop, my attention always had to be on something strange to process feelings and conversation. “If I admit it to myself, I think I’m looking forward to this Christmas. It’s setting up to be the best Christmas of my life.”
Ms. King patted my hand. “And what about Brent?”
“We’ve been dancing around things. But when he returns, I think I’m going to go for it. To tell him how I feel. Take a chance with someone for once in my life.”
“It’s about time.” Ms. King teased. “Seriously, I’m happy for you, but remember, work on talking to people. Start with Brent and tell him how you feel. Remember, you left last time. If you plan on spending time in Christmas Mountain and you want to see him, don’t waste any time letting him know. And then talk to Emma, Carol and Morgan and the others, keep going until you’ve initiated conversation with everyone you care about, then, and only then, will you really have the best Christmas.”
“I’ve already seen Morg
an and Lexi. Neither of them hates me at all. I mean, Morgan wasn’t happy I ran off like I did, and Lexi didn’t even mention it, but it’s Emma I’m most concerned about. She was always so perfect. Could she ever understand why I left without a word?”
I noticed her hands had swelled more than before and I wanted to ask about the tests, but I knew she wouldn’t tell me anything. The basics yes, perhaps, but I was better off getting the news from other ladies in town. There was a positive side to town gossip. I knew how much people cared about Ms. King and there was a way I could follow her advice and work on saving the Christmas Mountain Community Center and reviving the town. I’d start making those calls immediately. “Looks like you’re developing one of your brilliant ideas.” She teased. “Will it land you in jail?”
I laughed and shook my head. “Not this time. Well, you never know. Sometimes I think trouble finds me even when I hide from it. Especially here in Christmas Mountain. But for now, I’ll get started on my plan. Thanks for all your advice. It’s always solid.”
“You mean you actually listen to me now?” She pushed from the chair and walked with a shuffle like old Mrs. Cross. I wanted to fix her, to make her better, but I was no doctor. All I could do is focus on her request. It was time for me to go face my old friends and work on the extravaganza. It would be the best one since sixth grade if I had my way. But there was one thing I had to get first: my friendship bracelet. I only hoped Mom never threw it away. It was time I got it out and found my friends.
“I can bring soup, tea, anything you want.” I told Ms. King. She nodded.
“Thanks, but they already have a schedule to bring me meals. I get a ring at the door and when I open it there is a dish, but no one there. You know how it is.”
I remembered when Mom had pneumonia when I was in eighth grade. We had dinners arrive daily until the doctor released her. I didn’t know for a while that it was different people dropping it off. It was the small-town way. “Okay, if you need anything else, you promise to call?”
“Yes.” She leaned on the banister, so I opened the front door myself.
“Please get some rest.”
“I will, promise. I’m glad you’ll be here through Christmas, but Ash?”
“Yes?”
“What about after the holidays?”
That one question made my mind spin, my pulse hammer, and once again my life tilted on its side. I didn’t know how to answer her, so I just pressed my lips together and shrugged.
Fourteen
I slung my bag over my arm and entered the foyer of the Inn, half hoping to see Brent’s smiling face, even though I knew he was out east with his family. After taking one more glance at my phone to see if there was a text from him, I sighed with disappointment and entered the dining area. “Mr. Toni?”
“Yes?” He opened the kitchen door and greeted me with his normal boisterous welcoming voice. “Can I get you some scones?”
“I would normally love some, but I’m afraid I’m checking out.” I’d spent all night thinking about what Ms. King had said, and I wanted to get to know my family again before I headed back to Key West tomorrow. “I want to go visit with my dad. I haven’t seen him since arriving, and I know the only way I will is if I go stay at their house. My dad works all day, and I wouldn’t get to spend any time with him if I visited him at the Clavar farm, so I thought I’d spend the night with them.”
“Oh, they’d love that.” Mr. Toni wiped his hands on a dish towel.
“I hope so. It’s kind of a surprise.” I shifted between feet and straightened my bag on my arm trying to keep the nerves in check.
“They will be so happy.” He made his way to the register and processed my credit card. “You still thinking about that project you spoke about? If so, let me know what I can do to help. Not just for advertising the Inn, but the knitting store, the café, diner, all of it. It’s about time we banded together to save our town.”
“I couldn’t have said it better.” I signed my credit card slip and tucked the receipt in my purse. “I’ll keep you posted.
“Great. See you soon.” Mr. Toni shook my hand before he returned to the kitchen and I headed to Mom and Dad’s. I was excited to see my dad, it had been so long, but I knew he’d probably still be at work.
I reached their front door, knocked, rang, and looked through the side windows, but as I had suspected, they were both gone to work. Luckily, the not-so-hidden-key still remained under the planter, so I let myself in and went to drop my stuff of in my room.
I sat on my childhood bed looking at my sister’s on the other side of the room. The same pink and sage bedspread covered the mattress. Mine, the normal wrinkled, black and pink remained untouched. It was as if Mom never came in here after I’d left.
We’d always lived in close quarters with paneled walls and green shag carpet. I guess that’s why we fought so much. Who wouldn’t in a room straight from a 1980’s slasher film. One day, maybe we’d even get along. For now, I’d concentrate on my mother and father and my friends and my promise to Ms. King.
I went to the closet and stood on my tip toes to reach my ballerina music box. Dust covered the cracked, white, pleather top. I flipped open the tarnished lock and the ballerina sprung to life. She danced the way I always wished I could dance, but my flat feet were meant for hiking boots not point shoes. Inside was my friendship bracelet. The one Emma had tied on my wrist all those years ago.
I took out the bracelet and held it to my wrist. The strings were faded and fraying, but it would still tie with some help.
Tap. Tap.
I jumped and held the bracelet to my chest.
The door squealed open. The old door was tired and aged like the appearance of my dad. He was worn out from working too much and sun damage from being outside all the time covered his skin. “How you doing, kiddo?”
“Hi, Dad. I thought you’d be working.” I stood and opened my arms. We weren’t really a hugging kind of family, but I aimed to change that while I was here. I’d always been awkward with people unlike Emma or Carol who always got along with all the girls, with that hugging and sometimes kissing cheeks thing.
“Mr. Toni called me, so I headed straight home. Mr. Claver even gave me paid time off.” He patted my back, but then unexpectedly squeezed me into him. A real hug. Not at all what I was expecting. “Good to have you home.”
“Thanks.” Awkward. What did I say to the man I barely saw, but admired? He was always a tower of strength a rock of a man, but now his shoulders slumped with age. “You doing okay?”
“Oh, I’m good. Great now that I get to see my baby girl. Mr. Toni said you’re going to spend the night here. Why don’t we watch a scary movie and have popcorn?”
I’d forgotten about that tradition. It lasted a few months when Dad tried to get all us kids into a room where we didn’t try to kill each other, but then he took the night job in Creekside at the factory on Fridays and that ended our family time.
“I’d love that.”
“Come on, kiddo.” He offered his arm like we were about to embark on a date and led me to the living room. It was the same recliner that still smelled like stale smoke from before the time Dad gave up the nasty habit. “I’ll make some popcorn, you relax.”
“It’s okay, Dad. You’ve had a long day. You relax in your chair, I’ll make the popcorn.”
Mom entered the room with a glow about her. One I couldn’t remember ever seeing.
“Mr. Toni called you, too?”
“Of course. I came straight home.” She headed for the kitchen before I could move. “I’ll make the popcorn, you two relax. I’m just so excited you’re here.”
I sat on the floor next to my dad and leaned against his chair and realized they had never bought anything, updated a single appliance, carpet, or furniture. They’d worked hard to put food on the table and clothes on our backs. How could I have been so blind?
Dad’s hand brushed my hair on the top of my head. “Sure is good to have you home, k
iddo.”
The sound of popping echoed from the kitchen.
“It’s good to be home.” I sat next to my dad the way I had when I was a child before we moved to Christmas Mountain when I was only ten. Before everything changed. “Dad, why did we move to Christmas Mountain?”
His hand paused. “It’s a long story.”
“I have time.”
He let out a long breath. “There were several reasons. Someday when you have kids of your own, you’ll understand.”
I sighed.
“I lost my job.” He said in a wounded tone. “Your mom was amazing, though. We downsized to this home, she went to work, did all the cooking and cleaning and sewing and transporting kids around. I didn’t know until then what an amazing wife I had.”
“But you both had to work so hard. Why didn’t you try to get another job besides helping out on the farm?”
He started stroking my head again. “Because we were happier here. Things went wrong for us. It was my fault, really. A man sometimes thinks too highly of himself. Once I’d realized my mistakes, I didn’t face them. If it wasn’t for your mother our family would’ve broken up. To think, I felt like a consolation prize when we got married.”
I scooted so that I could face him. “What do you mean?”
“Your mom was so full of life. She had the choice of any man she wanted. You remind me a lot of her. Beautiful, strong, independent. Her parents kept her home, though. She wasn’t allowed to pursue her dreams. She wanted to go to college and be a doctor, but her father said he’d never pay for a girl to go to college. I offered her the world, but then gave her nothing. We married and had kids and she stayed home. I’d promised her adventure and I gave her monotony.”
“You gave me a family and love and I wouldn’t trade our life together for any college degree.” Mom handed me a bowl of popcorn and then sat on Dad’s armrest, snuggling into his side and planting a kiss to his forehead.