“Then there’s something I want to ask you.” He narrowed his brows. “How does it end?” After a long silence, he went on. “You know, after the part where I ask you to be my life partner?”
Several steps later, they stopped. When she turned to him, her eyes widened with a strong combination of seriousness and uncertainty. “That depends.”
“On what?”
As thunder rumbled, the sky brightened a notch. As Marcus took in the somber-looking sky, he compared it to his relationship to Hannah. The sky looked undecided on whether to rain again.
Follow your heart. Mom, when I promised you, I had no idea I’d have to change my entire life to do it.
Marcus edged his voice with seriousness. “Hannah, maybe we should go back.”
“A little rain never hurt anyone, did it? Besides, my daed says the rain’s not coming till later today. And he never mis-predicts.”
She paused, then edged her voice with seriousness. “Marcus, I don’t know how my story ends yet. How do you think it should end? Do you want to see us together forever?” She corrected, “I mean, in the story?”
The question didn’t take much thought. He offered a decisive nod. “Yeah, I do.”
In silence, they continued up the incline. As he breathed in damp air, he contemplated his situation with Hannah. The question wasn’t whether or not he wanted to marry her. He did. The issue was whether or not he could change his life to be with her.
He still wasn’t sure he could be an Amish man. Especially when it involved letting go of the deep bond with his father. But the love of cars he’d shared with his dad would never go away. Even if he joined Hannah’s faith. How much longer did he need to decide? A year from now . . . two years from now, would he know?
Stop beating yourself up. Anyone in my position would have trouble with this.
They proceeded in silence. The only sounds besides their breathing were the gentle lull of the creek that was now some distance beneath them. The sun shone bright in a cloudless blue sky, and the warmth feathered Hannah’s lashes like a soft cotton blanket on a cold winter’s night.
Light, buzzing sounds of an occasional honeybee competed with the sound of a bird chirping somewhere in the distance.
“I like to be in control of my life.”
“Like coming here?”
He nodded. “Even more important is protecting those I care about. And Hannah . . .” His voice cracked. “I can’t even begin to tell you how lost and helpless I felt when I learned about the robbery and that you were inside the store.”
She smiled a little at his honesty. She tried to stop the tears of joy that wanted to flow. “I’ve never had a friend care so much about me.”
She swatted a fly away from her face and fixed her gaze on his visage. After a slight pause, she softened the pitch of her voice to a conciliatory tone. “While everything was happening, my heart was pumping so fast, I just focused on keeping safe. But I feel sorry for the man who broke in.”
She was quick to note the surprised expression that immediately drew his brows together. “You’re kidding me.”
She softened her voice. “He’s out of a job. If he’d had faith in God, he never would have gone about getting money by robbing others.” After a slight pause, she firmed her tone. “When I’m over the shock of what happened, I’m going to talk to him, explain how different his life would be if he knew Jesus.”
What seemed an eternity later, they stood at the top of the hill. At the same time, they turned to look down at the creek. Above, thunder rumbled.
Finally, he motioned to the stones. “Let’s sit down and enjoy the view.”
When she looked up at him, he smiled, extending his hand. “Ladies first.”
She lifted the bottom of her dress enough to bend her legs and claim one of the stones. He watched as she rested her palms against the ground on both sides of her sitting place.
When she looked up at him, he took a seat on the other stone.
“I wonder how these stones ended up all the way at the top of this hill. Overlooking the best view in the world.”
Hannah turned a bit toward him. “You want to hear the story?”
He smiled in amusement. “Let me guess. It involves Old Sam.”
She laughed. “Gut try. But actually, Levi and Annie Miller, when they were just kids, carried these . . .” She pointed to the stones. “All the way up from the creek to sit on.”
“Really?”
“Um-hmm.”
He contemplated two youngsters carrying two very heavy stones up the hill. Marcus whistled. “They must’ve brought them up a little bit at a time. It must have taken them days.”
Hannah threw her hands in the air and offered an uncertain shrug of her shoulders. “I don’t know. But in the end, their efforts paid off, so we can enjoy this magnificent view.”
“I’ll have to thank them.”
“So will I.”
As the sun peeked out from underneath a cloud, Marcus blinked at the sudden brightness. He looked down for a moment, and when he lifted his chin, he turned so that his knee touched Hannah’s.
She softened the pitch of her voice. “From what I hear, they used to talk about things up here. That this was a gut decision-making place.”
Marcus narrowed his brows together, considering what she’d just said. As he looked down at the creek and at the two-story farmhouses scattered below, three things floated through his mind.
Follow your heart. You love Hannah. You’re making it too hard.
He closed his eyes a moment, struggling to hear the soft words his mother had told him. He yearned to talk to his mom this very moment. About Hannah. About how vastly different her life was from his and that he loved her anyway.
“Hannah?” After she turned to face him, he went on. “What you heard? About this being a good decision-making place?”
She nodded.
“You’re right about this being a good thinking place.”
“What’s on your mind, Marcus?”
He considered the question and didn’t respond. Because the thoughts flitting through his mind were so personal, he wasn’t sure he could talk to anyone about them. Even to Hannah.
The happiness that had filled her voice was now gone and had been replaced with concern. He had to say something.
His expression was a combination of surprise and fear. He took her hands in his and squeezed them with as much reassurance as he could.
“I love you so much, Hannah.”
She leaned forward. “I love you, too, Marcus.”
He drew in a deep breath of happiness. “My parents would have loved you, too.”
A long silence ensued before she broke it in a soft, curious voice. “Tell me about your mother. What was she like?”
“She was everything wonderful all packed into one person. She was kind. She used to volunteer at a soup kitchen. It’s funny: Growing up, we didn’t have a lot. In fact, my mom stayed home with my brothers until we were all in school. She never had a new dress, but she always knew where we were.” He laughed. “She loved doing laundry.”
Hannah’s smile widened.
“And she even enjoyed ironing Dad’s shirts. Packing our lunches.” He shook his head as he recalled something he’d forgotten. “She cut cartoons out of the newspaper and stuck them in our lunch boxes.”
“She really loved you.”
The more Marcus told Hannah about his mother, the more he missed her. “She used to say that taking care of us boys was her greatest joy.”
Hannah softened the pitch of her voice. “I wish I could’ve met your mother, Marcus. I’d like to thank her. For you.”
Hannah’s statement prompted him to think for a moment. For some reason, he wasn’t expecting that.
“Your mother passed you on to me. And I consider you a wonderful, unexpected blessing in my life, Marcus. In fact, knowing you has changed me.”
Her statement stopped his thoughts for a moment. Because definitely, he recip
rocated her sentiment. “You’ve changed me, too, Hannah. And I wish you could have met my parents. They’d love you.” After a slight hesitation, he added, “Like I do.”
At that moment, Hannah inched closer to him. A long, emotional silence ensued while they sat in silence. And as the two of them looked down at Pebble Creek, everything became crystal clear to him. Satisfaction and happiness filled his chest until he wanted to shout with joy.
His decision was made.
* * *
Suddenly, the temperature dropped a few notches, and the breeze turned cooler. Automatically, Hannah crossed her arms over her lap and shivered. But what caused the goose bumps that rushed up her arms wasn’t so much the temperature as it was her indecision about a future with Marcus. She wanted to be with him.
Even more, she yearned for him to be happy. And she sensed that joining the Amish faith may be out of his reach, even if he loved her. But she kept Marcus’s promise on her mind. Follow your heart. It sounded like something Old Sam would’ve said.
“Marcus, I want to make you happy.”
Clearing an emotional knot from her throat, she released her fingers from his and sat up straighter on her stone. As she did so, large, fluffy clouds moved across the sky. Thunder sounded, and she was sure it would rain sooner than her daed had predicted. But it was important to finish this conversation. The outcome would affect the rest of both their lives. And she wasn’t about to leave it on the table.
“My love for you is real. I can feel it in every breath I take. And the only way to decide my story’s ending is to play it out in real life.”
He stared at her.
“I’ll give you my ending. But only if we replay the story.”
He parted his lips in surprise before he heeded her request. His voice cracked with emotion. “Hannah, will you be my life partner?”
She let out a breath of relief and smiled. “What your mother said . . . about following your heart . . . I truly believe she was an amazing woman to have wanted that so much for you. I’ll carry out her wish. I love my faith, but there are other churches that serve the same God. There’s only one Marcus Jackson. I’ll give up my faith to spend my life with you.”
She softened her voice. “I’ll marry you.”
* * *
Marcus took in Hannah’s words, which had been spoken with such honesty and sincerity. What she’d just said left him without words to respond. For long, thoughtful moments, he absorbed Hannah’s admission. That she would give up her faith to be with him. There it was. His solution to happily ever after. He could have everything he’d wanted. Hannah Lapp. And he wouldn’t have to join her faith to spend the rest of his life with her.
At the top of the hill, Marcus stood in great contemplation. Say something. She’s just given up her entire being to spend her life with you. She looked up at him. As he studied her, the expression in her eyes was an intense combination of jubilation and uncertainty.
Indeed, the woman had no doubt in her mind that she would give up everything for him. The look on her face was honest and true. And for some reason, he wasn’t sure what to say as he looked down at the farmhouses that dotted the landscape.
In the distance, workhorses pulled farm equipment in the fields. An occasional horse and buggy could be spotted on the narrow blacktops that paved the way through the vast area of country.
Below, Pebble Creek loomed. On both sides of them, clover patches surrounded their feet.
Somewhere close by was the very spot where Old Sam had hidden Esther’s sixtieth wedding anniversary gift. As the breeze caressed the back of Marcus’s neck, they faced each other. As she looked up at him, his breath hitched with emotion. Because the expression in her eyes was different from anything he’d ever seen.
But something wasn’t right.
Chapter Sixteen
Inside Amish Edibles, Hannah hand-sewed a corner that was too difficult to reach with her sewing machine. It was the best time of day to work on her project since the sunbeam coming in through the windows was the strongest and she could easily see her stitches.
Afterward, she took in what was nearly finished, and the corners of her lips automatically lifted into a wide, satisfied smile. She was ready to do the backing, which was the last step.
In front of her, the poly batting was pinned to the quilt to the rollers of the frame. The different colors of blue connected into one beautiful piece that looked amazingly as if it had been born that way.
The more time she spent with the quilt, touched it, gazed at the blues, the more she thought of Marcus and the blanket his maemm had made for him. The very fabric he’d never forgotten.
At the same time, she sensed that her own quilt represented her special relationship with Marcus. Like the pieces sewn together in front of her, parts of Marcus and parts of herself had automatically blended into one beautiful relationship. It was something so unexpected. And so amazing.
As she began to roll the frame, she looked up at the window. She glimpsed Miracle. Automatically, her thoughts drifted to the fiction she’d written and the scene where Miracle’s whinny had been the turning point in capturing the thief.
As she cleaned up around the quilt, she stacked the stencils and placed them back into their plastics. The numbered pieces went into a different bag. She retrieved a few pins and stuck them into her cushion. She collected her thimbles and put them on the small table nearby.
When the work in front of her was as neat as she could make it, she thought of the last conversation she’d had with Marcus two days before. When they’d hiked up to the top of Pebble Creek and discussed where they should go from there.
For a pensive moment, she lowered her gaze to the floor and swallowed an emotional knot. Don’t be sad. I offered him what I love most so he wouldn’t have to forfeit his bond with his father. And that wasn’t easy. I’ve been praying about what to do since we met. I’ve been asking Gott how to tell my parents and my brothers without creating friction. I’m stunned that he didn’t feel it was the right thing to do. And I’m disappointed because I thought that leaving my beautiful way of life was what would enable us to spend the rest of our lives together.
When they’d proceeded to walk down the hill in silence, a huge void had filled her heart. And she worried that it would never go away. But what will become of us? Obviously, I surprised him by offering to give up what I love most for him. And obviously, he is having second thoughts about being with me.
As she gazed out at her horse, a tear slipped down her cheek. Slow steps took her to the entrance, where she opened the door and stepped outside. As she closed the door behind her, the bell rang. But she barely heard it as she went to Miracle. As her arms went around his long nose, she planted a kiss on his brown mane and looked into his large, hazel eyes. “I love you so much. You managed to make it when the odds were against you. Gott helped Dr. Zimmerman save your life.”
Choking, she nuzzled her face into his mane and tightened her grip around his nose. “I wish Gott would rescue me from the pain I’m feeling.”
* * *
That evening, after work, Marcus cruised down the country blacktop outside of Arcola. Hannah’s offer to change for him had stopped his thoughts.
As cornfields loomed on both sides of him, he enjoyed the warm air against the side of his face. The sunset displayed the most magnificent colors he’d ever seen. But the thought of their discussion at Pebble Creek distracted him from even that marvelous picture.
He slowed as he approached a stop sign. He looked both ways and proceeded. He set his cruise control at fifty miles an hour and rested his elbow on the sill of the open window.
In the distance, a horse-pulled buggy traversed a four-way intersection. In his rearview mirror, a truck headed south. His head ached, and he dragged his right hand down his face, struggling to make sense of why he hadn’t said yes to Hannah’s unbelievable, unexpected offer.
As the smell of manure filled his car, he considered the scent that he was now accusto
med to. When I first came here, I found it offensive. Now, I realize that God has His own way of providing everything we need. And most of those things don’t come in containers.
Hannah, I’m sorry I let you down. I saw the look of disappointment on your face when I didn’t respond to your offer to change for me. But I’m not disappointed in anything you did. I’m ashamed of myself.
He cleared his throat and continued onto the country road. As he passed a two-story, white house surrounded by farmland, his mother’s words floated through his head. Follow your heart. He’d promised her. And failed. But ironically, Hannah had heeded his mother’s words.
She was willing to do exactly what his mom had asked him to do. He let out a breath. And that was exactly what was wrong with the picture.
A new ache swept through him until a groan escaped his throat. At the same time, everything started to come together in his mind. As he sorted out what had happened, the pain inside him started to go away, and he slowed the car to turn it around. By the time he reached his house, reality had etched its marks inside him. I’m overwhelmed that Hannah would leave her faith to be with me. But it would never work. And I’ve got to tell her. Tomorrow.
* * *
The following morning, inside Amish Edibles, Hannah removed her quilt from its frame and folded it neatly. As she took her finished piece in her hands, she pulled it to her chest with great affection.
She closed her eyes and contemplated all the work she’d put into the quilt and that so many unconnected pieces of material could come together in a way to look so seamless and beautiful. In a way, her relationship with Marcus represented all the separate pieces.
Unfortunately, unlike the parts of the beautiful material in her hands, she and Marcus hadn’t been able to unite their differences to create a Christian relationship for the rest of their lives.
Dear Gott, please help me to accept that I won’t marry Marcus. I still love him. Why did he hesitate to commit to our future? Especially after I offered to give up my beloved way of life to be with him?
The bell on the door rang. Hannah startled as she put her quilt on the table and made her way to the front of the store, where she faced Marcus.
Promise at Pebble Creek Page 20