by Lucy Rains
A BROKEN JEWEL
By Lucy Rains
Dedicated to readers everywhere,
that love to get lost
in a good story.
A Broken Jewel
Part One of the JADE series
CHAPTER 1
Watch yourself.
Don’t stand out.
I repeated my mantra in my head while staring at my fingers that rested on the red track. I could hear the staggered breathing of the girls around me. While the others were revving themselves up, I was calming myself down. When the boards clapped, the sharp staccato tapping of track spikes filled the air as we shot out of the starting blocks. I pushed myself forward quickly to get ahead of the other racers, then slowly moved to the innermost lane.
I set my sights on the back of Tiff’s head, watching her golden pony tail swish from side to side. As in every race, she pulled in front of me and I fought back the ever present urge to pull in front of her.
Don't stand out.
Don't be noticed.
Tiff’s labored breathing filled the air, reminding me of the need to look somewhat strained as we raced. I released a heavy breath and let my mouth fall open slightly, relaxing my jaw. My muscles were relaxed, comfortable, our current pace not even a challenge. I shoved down the desperate urge to let myself race at a speed that would shock everyone around me.
We pulled around the corner of the track finishing the first of two laps. Coach Hovis stands to the side, yelling my name, encouraging me to pick up my speed and pull first. But I don’t. I follow Tiff, making sure my stride matches hers. No more, no less.
Tiff knew that I was close behind her as we pushed towards the end of our 800m trial run. This is our usual race routine. She leads, I follow. She increases her pace, I match it. We've done this hundreds of times. She quickens her stride, wanting to make sure she keeps her front position, and I matched her speed. Effortlessly.
Coaches and teammates cheer as we push down the last 50 meters, Tiff pulling ahead, and me letting her. I create the image of exerting my full energy as we cross the finish line, gasping for air, limbs hanging at my side. Other girls fly up beside me at the finish line, gasping and coughing. I stride ahead of my other teammates as they cool down from the race, wanting a moment of solitude. I can only feign tiredness for so long.
My wrist wipes over my forehead and I close my eyes, breathing in deeply. The late spring air of Baltimore was thick with moisture, bringing a natural glisten to my skin, and weighing down my already thick, dark hair. I sighed, glad that practice was almost over. Track was a means to an end. It was no outlet for my strength and took a great amount of patience. But I bore through it for a greater goal. Freedom.
I turned around and started walking back to where Coach Hovis had gathered the girls together for an end of practice pep talk. After a step forward, a sudden throb in my chest made me pause. My hand shot to the spot between my breasts and I pushed lightly. The throb, though not painful, was foreign and disconcerting.
I turned away from the team, hiding the blatant confusion on my face. The throb turned to vibrations, which were gentle, and deep within my core. Was it my heart? My lungs? I had never felt illness before, so I couldn’t imagine what would cause the sensation.
An unexplained energy poked at the edge of my mind. The hairs on the back of my neck raised up and I looked around me. Searching for the source of my unease.
The track was enclosed by a 7 foot chain link fence, lined with trimmed shrubs several feet tall, grown every few feet. Several meters up the fence line stood a young man with coppery brown hair. Lean, tall, and staring at me. Staring at me in a way that I had never been stared at before, especially not by a guy. Much less a beautiful one. With his arms above his head he leaned lazily into the fence. His brown leather coat worn over a plain white shirt, his torn jeans hanging loosely.
The hairs down my arm raised and my heart beat sped up. His eyes bore into mine, holding them so that I couldn’t look away. My hand continued to gently rub at my chest as I studied him.
I knew I had never seen him before. I would have remembered the thick eyebrows, the cut jawline that held beautiful lips. Lips that were pursed tightly together, almost in...distaste. Like the sight of me was somewhat unpleasant for him. I felt an emotion radiate towards me, and somehow I knew he also was confused. I focused my vision on him, wanting to see him more clearly despite our distance and then stopped. Suddenly intimidated at the hazel eyes that were boring into me. My mind was screaming that it was time to back away.
“Jade!” my coach yelled, jolting me out of my trance. I turned and she waved me over to join the group. I glanced back to the stranger, but only saw the brown leather jacket disappear around the shrubs.
I trotted over quickly to the group in a stupor, and stood by my friends Mia and Vicki, not hearing anything that coach was saying. The low hum in my chest dissipated into nothing and I dropped my hand. When I glanced around me I found Tiff staring at me. Her face filled with smug superiority.
“Hurdlers, and Sprinters, be here tomorrow at 10am for practice. Everyone else can take the day off.”
The group scattered and I made my way over to the bleachers to remove my spikes. Runners were heading inside the locker room, and the rest of the girls were putting away equipment from their other events. As I pulled my shoelaces apart my mind still raced around the cause of my chest vibrations, and the stranger at the fence. I didn't have time to think about it any longer when my friends found me.
Mia and Vicki plopped down on either side of me on the bleachers to pull off their own spikes.
“Girl!” Mia started as she fixed her ponytail, her short black hair tied back from her face but little wisps had pulled free. “You let her beat you again?”
I huffed, indignant, “Let her? I didn't let her.” I avoided eye contact and picked at my shoes.
“Jade, she has beat you in every race since 9th grade, practice and meets! You need to put an end to this,” she shook her head. “Her ego is suffocating me.”
I slipped my sandals on and stood up, “So do I need to beat her for a humility lesson, or because it would be beneficial for me?”
“You need to beat her,” Vicki chimed in, “because she thinks she can walk all over you and everyone else in this school.” Vicki dropped her spikes into her sports bag. “Having her lose would help knock her down a few pegs.”
I dug out my chapstick from my bag and hurriedly swiped a layer over my lips. The feeling of moisture bringing a small bout of relief. “Thanks for the pep talk. I'll run faster next time.”
Vicki stood up and rolled the sleeves of her shirt up. It was obvious from her sweat soaked yellow T shirt that she had worked hard during practice. “Faster isn’t good enough, you need to beat her.”
I rolled my eyes, “You guys are starting to sound like my mother, please stop.” I honestly didn’t care that Tiff had beat me at every race through my high school career. I didn’t care about her ego or coming in second. I had much more important things to worry about.
“Willis!” Coach Hovis barked suddenly. All three of us turned to look at her. “Get your sleeves down and take another lap.”
Vicki rolled her eyes, “Seriously? There's not a human male anywhere in the vicinity. Plus, it's bloody hot out here!”
“You of all people know the rules. Now hurry up.” Coach stated, and then walked into the locker room.
Vicki groaned and dramatically ripped her sleeves back down her shoulders “Fantastic,” she mumbled, and began a slow jog around the track in her athletic sandals.
Mia and I waited patiently for Vicki to carry out her punishment. The all girls-school had tight rules. No gum, no swearing, no nail po
lish, and no inappropriate exposure of skin. Like shoulders. These were only a few to name, and there was never any wiggle room.
We started making our way towards the locker room, water bottles and spikes in hand. We entered the bustling locker room and squeezed passed girls lined up in front of the mirrors, their fingers full of compacts, eye brushes, lip products, and everything else that isn’t allowed during the school day. Showers turned on and off in the rear of the room, locker doors slammed, lively chatter filled the air. As we stepped in front of our lockers Mia suddenly perked up beside me and grabbed my arm. “You're coming tonight, right?”
My heart sank. “Um...”
Her hand shot in front of my face holding up a finger, “You've been to only one of my parties in the past 2 years. This is my last one!”
I blew a breath out slowly, gently pushing her hand down. “Mia, you know how my mom is.”
She sighed in exasperation.“Your mom does not need to know details! Just say you're coming to hang out for the night.”
“Mia has great connections,” added Vicki, “there are going to be lots of guys there.”
I pulled my gym bag out from locker and started piling my gear inside. Without thinking the words slipped out, “I know, that's the problem.”
Mia groaned in frustration, “What is your mom’s deal? It’s not like someone is going to spike your drink and date-rape you! My parents will be there, you can tell her to call them.”
My entire body tightened at her comment. She wasn’t helping her cause. I cleared my throat, “It's hard to explain. She thinks they're a distraction, and she really doesn't want me getting involved with anyone.”
Using my mom as an excuse came in handy. Truly, she was quite strict when it came to me being around the opposite sex. But her desire to keep me away from boys was nothing compared to my own.
Mia sighed happily as she sat down, “They are the best kind of distraction. But really, you are coming tonight, and I'm not taking no for an answer. I will drive over and kidnap you if I have to.” She smacked my back. “Last party of the year, come be social.”
I was about to protest again when I felt someone come stand behind me. I looked up to see Tiff, dressed in her sweatsuit with a Lulelemon bag draped over her shoulder. Her face set in a sappy smile.
“Can’t wait for your party tonight, Mia.” She looked down at me where I sat, her smile fading into mock concern. “Did I hear you might not come?”
I looked towards Mia and Vicki, wondering where this question would lead. “I’m not sure yet,” I say quietly.
Her eyes widen slightly “That’s too bad, this might be your last chance.”
I held her gaze, waiting for the ugly punch line.
She gestured towards me, “To actually kiss a guy before you graduate high school.”
I roll my eyes, trying to control the burn starting in my ears. Grabbing my bag I stood up, ready to run from this confrontation.
“Oh shut-up Tiff, nobody wants to hear it,” Vicki growled under her breath.
Tiff’s face twisted into a sneer, ignoring her. Her eyes ran down my body to my toes and back up to my face. “Everyone knows you’ve never even touched a guy.”
Vicki groaned and shook her head. “You're hurting my head.”
I gave Tiff a bored look, “Unlike yours, I'm glad my high school career doesn't revolve around sexual interaction with boys.”
Her eyebrows came down, her nose wrinkling, “And that's why you're a freak.”
She had no idea.
Mia pivoted around on the bench while putting on a clean shirt to look at Tiff. “Tiff, are you and Cameron suddenly study buddies? Because I’m pretty sure I saw your car parked in front of his house every night this week. And I’m extra sure Trent would be very interested to hear about how often you've been at his best friend’s house.”
“Skank” Vicki muttered quietly under her breath, yet loud enough for us all to hear.
Tiff's clear complexion turned pink, and she glared at Mia. “That’s a lie!” she hissed.
“Hey, I know what I saw.” Mia finished zipping up her bag and stood up. Her voice dropped in both volume and pitch. “Play nice, or you'll find yourself removed from the invite list for tonight, with a ruined reputation.”
Tiff shot Mia a look that could kill as she disappeared around the corner. I let out a nervous chuckle, “Nice Mia.”
“Girl, I got you.” She winked and slammed her locker shut.
“Jade,” Vicki said as she brought her gym bag over to me. “Before I forget.”
She pulled out a small tan envelope and handed it to me. I peeked inside, pleased to see the large wad of bills folded up at the bottom. I stuffed it inside my own big quickly. “Thanks. I’ll bring more inventory on Monday.”
“Your stuff sells faster each month. Are you sure you can keep up with the demand?”
I shrugged, “My mom won’t be home till Sunday, that gives me time to prep several more pieces for you.”
She nodded zipping up her own bag.
“Let’s go Vicki,” Mia urged, “I have a party to prep for.” She got up to leave but before going too far shouted back at me, “And I will see you tonight!”
Vicki gave me a quick hug and walked out to catch up with Mia.
********************
I slipped into the leather seat of my Audi and closed the door behind me. I let out a shuddering breath as Tiff’s words replayed in my mind. No, not her words, her actions. The blatant attention to my awkward body. I knew it lacked womanly curves. Even though I was stronger than she would ever be, my body was the extreme epitome of what a late bloomer was. Hardly enough breast tissue to fill an A cup, hips like a 12 year old boy, and no menstruation yet. I fought off the shame that crept under my skin. I didn’t desire the curves that came with puberty to catch a guy's attention. I was happy being left alone. But my body was so different than other people in many ways, I yearned to at least look normal.
Thinking about guys though, my mind drifted to the stranger at the fence. But I stopped that trail of thought quickly, brushing it off and wanting to move on. The chest vibrations were concerning as well, but owning to the fact that my body was not typical, I decided to forget about it.
Before turning on the car, I pulled out a 32 oz water bottle and began draining it, drinking like I had just crossed the Sahara desert at high noon on a summer day in Morocco. The cold liquid quenched the ever present thirst that plagued me. When that bottle was empty I grabbed a second, and then a third. After the fourth bottle my head felt clearer, and my muscles revived. I added the empty bottles to the four that were already in my gym bag.
As I left school and drove to the nearest gas station, I contemplated my dilemma about Mia's party. Did I want to go? Only for Mia. She was a good friend to me, and had always been by my side throughout high school, despite my differences. My awkward figure, my shy nature, and my oppressive, over-controlling mother.
But there would be guys there. That posed more problems than I knew how to deal with. Mother would forbid it if she knew. And I didn’t know if I could ward off a panic attack should a guy get too close. I was socially awkward enough around people of the same gender as me, but put me around guys, I was messed up beyond my control. I told my friends that this was all due to the fact that my mother had done everything in her power to keep me away from them since middle school. Which may be true, but the biggest reason was buried in a deep dark place that no one would ever know. A place that would often haunt my dreams.
I pulled up to a pump at my regular corner store gas station. My digital dash controls blinked all status updates of the car’s current functions. I pushed the ‘engine-off’ button on the middle console and then dug out my mother’s credit card, used only for this weekly occasion. My car was luxurious and modern, with all the bells and whistles I didn’t care about. Because the most important bell of all was the GPS tracking system built into the head unit of the dash. To anyone looking in, it looked like
a standard GPS navigation system. But I knew it was more than that. It provided my mother a way to track my Audi’s whereabouts at all times.
While my car was refueling, I gave a sidelong glance at the old Ford Bronco parked in front of me. It was missing the rear window, the others mostly foggy with lack of cleaning. The once black, now greying scuffed up body of the 4X4 could use a new paint job and dent repair. But it wasn’t the vehicle that held my attention, it was the obnoxious behavior from the 4 individuals that stood around it. 2 couples, early 20s, laughing loudly, swearing with no care to who heard, hanging around the gas pump while it refueled. They looked like they hadn’t showered in weeks, and my sensitive nose agreed. One heavily tattooed, long haired guy draped an arm over a petite pixie girl, with a cigarette hanging casually out of his fingers. The other male had one tucked behind his ear. I turned my attention back to my gas pump, mentally urging it to hurry along.
When my car was done, I grabbed my envelope of cash and headed inside the gas station.
Right away, I went up to the counter, wanting to take care of my cash business. Rob, bless his old heart, gave me a toothy grin as he walked up to the counter to help me.
“Afternoon,” he greeted, a slow drawl. “Cash card again?”
I nodded and smiled. I pulled out my wallet which held $350 in cash, and then the $200 that Vicki had given me that day. I purchased a Visa cash card for $500, and pocketed the remaining change, after the fees had been paid. When the transaction was finished, I slipped my new Visa card into a secret compartment in my wallet, that held two other cards with the same amount.
Rob never asked questions. Just minded his business, and left me to my own.
Zipping up my wallet, I walked over towards the Slushie machines and let out a happy sigh. My secret guilty pleasure. Sugar and sweets were forbidden both at home and school. So, every Friday I looked forward to drowning out life with sugary bliss for a few minutes.