“You were perfect.”
Chastity rubbed her back while Freya worked on evening out her breathing. After a moment, she got up and sat in the desk chair. Chastity left momentarily, and returned with a plate of food for Freya. She didn’t try to engage her in conversation; she just placed the plate in front of her and left her alone.
Freya expected to feel torn apart, to feel as if she were bleeding, yet she felt nothing. She had just done the hardest thing she would ever have to do. She had just faced her ghost head on, and made it to the other side. It was over; she might never have to see him again. He could return to being a ghost; no, he would be nothing more but another colonist.
Freya didn’t have much time to gather her thoughts, or get any work done, for that matter. A message came through that the Council was calling an emergency meeting.
Panic instantly took over her. Had the doctors found something wrong with Colin so quickly? Could he have just keeled over dead or something? Chastity came hurriedly into the office and turned on the monitor to prepare for the meeting. Freya greeted everyone, and waited for the news to be delivered.
“Madam head of State, the Council is requesting that you retract your statement delivered at your address today.”
Freya’s jaw nearly came unhinged. “I’m sorry. I don’t understand,” she stammered. “Is there news about the colonist who came through? Is he not in good health?”
“Thus far, his state of health has checked out satisfactory,” replied the male voice. “What we are referring to is where you declared that everyone who wishes to move to the colony world may do so as soon as the colonist was found healthy.” He paused again. “This was not a part of the speech that was written for you. We do not have a viable plan in place for mass migration.”
Freya nearly scoffed. The Council couldn’t change a light bulb without careful calculations. “So then we make a plan for that migration,” she replied in a sharp tone. “Of course I can appreciate that the masses can’t be moved all in one day, but we can start the process. We will send out a survey, just as we did for the population increase.”
“It is not that simple. We can’t send any part of the population who would be a burden, ones who are either too old or too young to help to build the colony.”
“As I said, we will treat this like our population increase. We will send out a survey, and only send the ones who can help to build until the infrastructure is in place to set up education centers for the youth.”
“That could take a decade, or perhaps even more. You stated that they could simply go if they want to. You didn’t mention any selection process or that there would be a wait time,” he replied.
“I think you are underestimating the intelligence of the general population. Of course we can’t send everyone who wants to go tomorrow,” she snapped back at him. Freya had always spoken to the Council with humility and respect. Something about the tone he was taking with her got under her skin. “I will, of course, be happy to give regular updates, if you feel more information about the process needs to be given. But until our colonist comes back with a clean bill of health, this is a moot point of discussion.”
There was a long pause on the other side of the monitor.
“So you are refusing your retraction then?” he asked.
“Perhaps you could be spending this time to form a proper migration plan as opposed to arguing about our lack of a plan,” she replied.
“Very well then,” he said, and the meeting abruptly ended.
“Chastity, I want you to draw up the survey. I want it ready to be sent out the moment we receive notice that Colin has cleared his medical.”
“Who am I to send it to?”
“Everyone. Every single man, woman, and child will be given the survey. Once we have the data of who wants to go, we will decipher who to send first.” Chastity nodded to Freya and took her leave.
Freya thought for a moment about how to start the screening process, yet her mind quickly wandered. Let the Council come up with their blessed plans; there was a different plan it was time for her to figure out. The plan that needs the most attention right now is how to take down the Council.
Chapter 18
There was a strange kind of peace that came over her while drifting off to sleep. She had taken on the Council, and it felt amazing. It was time to let the old ways go and open a path for a new dawn. This archaic way of life would soon be something in the history books. Those history books would need to be objectively written, which was a task she felt qualified to perform. The State was needed at a time—due to the blunders of a previous civilization, but that time was drawing near its end.
Both would need to be studied and understood. It was the only way a moderate government could stand. Her hands would be full in the months to follow, but she dreamed of what lay beyond the immediate struggle. She still held to the dream of stepping down when a new government could be properly formed and spend the remainder of her days in the garden of the State house.
She had a better sleep that night than any she could remember. Sleep had not been that delicious since her time with Colin, yet she didn’t ever revel in it as she was not hungry for it. The sun was rising as she started to stir. She must have slept for a solid seven hours. It was not just the sleep that was wonderful; she had not had a single nightmare.
As she headed to the exercise room, she noticed that the elation she was feeling the previous night was carried with her. She had stood up against the Council, and there wasn’t a damn thing they could do about it. Ursa would be proud of her. She had lived up to her end of the bargain. Everyone who wanted to live on the colony world would, and there was no need for war. They had both won, and now she felt Ursa’s soul could finally rest.
Her workout was brief but thorough. She didn’t need to exercise to keep her emotions in check; it was simply out of habit that she exercised for optimal health. Once she had showered and dressed for the day, she walked to her office with a spring in her step.
The number of messages in her inbox was even more excessive than ever. She sifted mindlessly until one subject heading caught her eye: ‘Colonist Medical Report.’ Without a single thought, she dove straight into the message. Her body instantly broke into a cold sweat.
There were so many numbers; she didn’t understand numbers. His heart rate, cholesterol, neural activity, muscle function, reflexes—all broken down into data—a language in which she was not fluent. Fortunately, there was one sentence at the bottom of the report written in words.
“All tests conclude the colonist is in equal health as to the time before the departure of the spacecraft.”
Freya let out a heavy sigh, which was shortly followed by tears, and somehow she started screaming. The door to her office had been left ajar; Devina ran in first. She tried to grab her by the shoulder, but Freya just grabbed her back and started to jump up and down.
“Okay, crazy, what is going on?” Devina nearly yelled. Chastity rushed into the room.
“He’s fine,” Freya stammered. “He’s fine!” she yelled. She broke off her grip from Devina and turned to face Chastity, who, although she held an air of being completely calm, had tears running down her face. “He’s fine,” she repeated.
“I know. I have your survey ready to send on your command.”
“Who’s fine? What’s happened?” Devina cut in.
“The colonist—his medical report has cleared. The transport device is safe,” Chastity said calmly.
Devina sat down on a chair and propped her feet up on Freya’s desk. “Well, consider this my resignation then. You are going to have to find yourself a new cook.” She crossed her arms, shortly after she burst out laughing. “But seriously, when can I go?”
“There is a survey being sent out. You may fill yours in and wait in line with the others,” Chastity replied.
“Oh, come on! I deserve to go to the top of the list. I’ve got connections.” She winked at Freya.
“Well, being
that I don’t know how to cook my own food, I can’t make you any promises,” Freya replied.
Devina pretended to sulk off angry, but turned and hugged Freya at the last second before she left.
Chastity looked to Freya with a more serious tone. “I have your speech ready. I think it would be best for you to make your address immediately.”
“Wow, you wrote this already?” Freya looked over at her tablet.
“I felt optimistic, so I wrote it last night,” Chastity responded.
Freya read it over rapidly. A broad grin spread across her face. It was perfect. It said everything that needed to be said, and still gave the Council a small token.
“Let me know when you are ready,” Chastity said.
Freya nodded, and she activated the monitor. The logo for the State came up on the screen, the sight that let everyone know it was time to stop what they were doing to watch the broadcast. Chastity cued Freya to the camera, and she began the address.
“My fellow citizens. It is with great joy that I come before you today. Our medical reports have shown the transport device has been deemed a viable form of transportation between our two worlds.” She paused for a moment; her voice was beginning to crack a little. Tears welled up in her eyes, but for the first time in her life, she was crying tears of joy.
“Today you will all be sent a survey to inquire into your interest in taking part of the colonization project. All possible candidates will be given an interview where the risks will be explained. Our lead team of scientists are forming a list of the needs anticipated on our new world. Each candidate will have an opportunity to relocate as the infrastructure of the new world becomes available. It may be weeks for some of you, or months—possibly even years. It will take much strength, much diligence, all qualities I have seen of you in the past year leading up to this moment. We all have sacrificed; we all have worked past the point of exhaustion. I assure you, your efforts have been noted, and they have not been in vain.” She paused again, wiping away her tears. “You should all feel a sense of pride, as I am proud to call you my people, my great citizens of the State.”
Chapter 19
If there was a wind sweeping through the State, a flurry of excitement, Freya would have no idea. She had sealed herself inside her office. Chastity would deliver her meals, and otherwise the door was closed. There were so many messages in her inbox, so many that needed her attention, and simply not enough hours in the day to keep up on it all.
The messages were almost completely about the colonization project, which could possibly account for the fact that she did not immediately open the one email that truly needed her immediate response. As she read the message, her mind instantly rejected it. She looked at the time it was sent, the time it was currently, and then just stared at the message again. It was simply incomprehensible.
Madam Head of State,
The colonist has requested a meeting with you in your office before returning to the colony world. As he is the leader in communications on the colony world, we have agreed to his request. He will be arriving at 18:00 via the military passage directly to your office.
Regards,
The Council
He was to arrive in five minutes. It was too late to stop it. He was undoubtedly waiting at the checkpoint now, the place where Lewis had trained her before their mission. A numbness came over her entire body; all color drained from her. Colin was simply going to appear in her office.
Why is he doing this? Why is it necessary? Did he come to gloat? Is he going to speak of politics as though he had never known me? Would he even know about his mother, or that we had known each other?
There was a knock from under the floor. She had been staring at the screen of her tablet for five minutes. The door opened, and a military officer stepped inside.
“Madam head of State, I present to you our brave colonist who has requested a meeting with you,” he said, and saluted her. “He has passed a thorough security check.”
“I am not concerned for my safety,” she replied dryly. “I trust your capabilities.”
“Madam, he has requested a meeting in private. The security check was necessary.”
Freya let out a big sigh. She had held onto the thought that they would not be alone, and that was when the numbness turned to nausea.
“I see. I suppose you granted this request.” Her voice sounded clear and confident, a trick she was learning slowly as the head of State, how to stop letting her emotions be heard in her voice.
“Yes, Madam head of State. We see no risk, and the Council approved it.” He paused. “His name is Colin. I will take my leave now and send him in.”
“Yes, thank you. I know his name.” She looked back down at her tablet. She did not look up at him as he walked into her office; she kept her eyes fixed on the glowing screen. It wasn’t a conscious choice, to ignore him, to act as though he hadn’t just walked in, it was just all she felt capable of.
He walked in slowly. She could see him looking at her out of her peripheral vision. After a moment of hesitation, he took a seat across from her desk. She raised her eyes slightly from her tablet, but couldn’t look him directly in the eyes.
“I feel like there is some poster child joke to be made here,” he said, after a moment’s hesitation.
“You may need to update that joke; I haven’t been a child for a long time,” she replied coldly.
“Poster woman?” He gave a nervous laugh and shifted around in his seat. “I guess the joke is over. You are no longer an example of what the State wants—you are the State.”
Freya nodded to acknowledge his statement, but still had not looked directly at him.
“Why won’t you look at me?” he asked.
“What is your purpose for requesting this meeting?” She finally looked at him. Her look, most likely in combination with her tone, made him now look away.
His mouth would open, and then close again; words were failing him. His eyes began to mist up slightly; his coloring changed. “I know it has been a long time for you since I left. I get that. You have obviously moved on with your life, but it was just a few months ago for me,” he said after a long pause, now looking at the ground.
“Yes?”
His eyes traveled up to hers for a brief moment, and then returned to the floor. “You look at me like you hate me,” he said. “I think you were warmer toward me the first time I walked into our apartment,” he added with a bitter laugh.
“You still have not told me the purpose for this meeting.”
He threw his hands up in the air, got up and started to pace the room. It was so odd to her how familiar yet distant this all felt.
“This is not at all what I expected,” he said, more to himself, still pacing.
“What exactly did you expect this meeting to entail?” Her pitch rose slightly.
He finally stopped pacing and just looked at her for a moment. “You never really loved me, did you?”
Freya was taken back; he completely pierced her armor.
“Interesting concept.” She paused. “I’m not the one who left.”
Colin reacted harshly to her words; he spun around and slammed his hand down on her desk. “Is that what they told you? I left!” he yelled. His face was barely a foot away from hers; he was so close she could feel the heat of his breath. She immediately leaned back in her chair to create some space between them. The strong façade she had been keeping up started to crack; her eyes began to mist slightly. “They did, didn’t they?” he demanded.
“What would that matter now?” she said softly, refusing to look at him.
“They took me, Freya. I had no choice.” He still leaned forward, demanding she look at him. “For every single moment that I have been awake in the last twenty-two years, since that night I got the notice and left our apartment, the only thought I’ve had is how I was going to get back to you. So yes, it matters to me if they lied to make you hate me.”
A single tear escaped and fled down
her cheek. There were so many years when knowing that for certain would have meant everything to her, but there had been so many more years since that time. She could not handle how close he still was to her, that she was showing emotion. It had to end, and it had to end immediately. She rose from her seat and stepped farther away from him.
“But it doesn’t matter,” she said. “Colin, I am the head of State, and old enough to be your mother.”
“I don’t care.”
“But you should,” she said. “We were just children back then, and I am not the person you remember.”
“I never for a second thought you would stop loving me.”
“I will always love the memory of you, and the time we shared,” she said. “I look back on us fondly, which I hope you also do twenty years from now and beyond.”
The State Series Box Set Page 68